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Greenshadow 10:04 AM 03-11-2011
I have a little boy that Ive been watching for almost a year now. Ive gotten to know them well and the mom and I get along great. The weird thing is some days it seems like she comes in in a bad mood and Im never sure if its something Ive done or not.
For example, she normally gets here at around 1:30-2:00, which is toward the end of nap time. Whenever I open the door and tell her that they are asleep, she kinda rolls her eyes like she doesnt like having to pick him up when he is asleep. Well, she's the one that chooses to come at that time; not me! Some days she comes and its later, like 2:30 or 3pm, and they've been up and had snack and are playing.
Today she showed up during nap time and when she came in to get him I told her that they'd only been napping for about an hour because we were playing and doing things that kept them up later. She never commented to me at all but went straight to her son and started trying to wake him up. They played in finger paints today and I took their shirts off because the smocks i usually use were not cleaned. When naptime came around, they didnt want to put their shirts back on so I didnt argue it. I pick my battles! She likes to talk to her 2 year old while she's trying to wake him up but it seems like she's really talking to me. Ever get parents like that? Anyway, she said something about him being cold because she thought he was shivering. My house is sitting at 75 degrees and Im always cold and I wasnt so he was fine. Obviously I would have put shirts on them had I felt that they were going to be cold. Then she said something after she got him up and was getting his shoes on about how she tries to come when he's not sleeping but its hit or miss....Ummm, coming between 12-2pm is right smack in the middle of naptime! How can she try to avoid naptime when she shows up right in the middle of it?
And we did a craft today and I gave it to her and she took it without even commenting on it or anything. She looked at me funny too. I dont know. I hate parents sometimes because I know they can have on days and off days but I just think its rude to not say anything to me the entire time she's in my house picking up her son.
But other times, she talks to me great and normal and tells me about her week and all that, like its nothing. I guess there's nothing to do but blow it off but its just weird....and I dont like defending myself, even if I dont say anything outloud to her at the time. I dont like feeling like Ive done something wrong.
For example, she normally gets here at around 1:30-2:00, which is toward the end of nap time. Whenever I open the door and tell her that they are asleep, she kinda rolls her eyes like she doesnt like having to pick him up when he is asleep. Well, she's the one that chooses to come at that time; not me! Some days she comes and its later, like 2:30 or 3pm, and they've been up and had snack and are playing.
Today she showed up during nap time and when she came in to get him I told her that they'd only been napping for about an hour because we were playing and doing things that kept them up later. She never commented to me at all but went straight to her son and started trying to wake him up. They played in finger paints today and I took their shirts off because the smocks i usually use were not cleaned. When naptime came around, they didnt want to put their shirts back on so I didnt argue it. I pick my battles! She likes to talk to her 2 year old while she's trying to wake him up but it seems like she's really talking to me. Ever get parents like that? Anyway, she said something about him being cold because she thought he was shivering. My house is sitting at 75 degrees and Im always cold and I wasnt so he was fine. Obviously I would have put shirts on them had I felt that they were going to be cold. Then she said something after she got him up and was getting his shoes on about how she tries to come when he's not sleeping but its hit or miss....Ummm, coming between 12-2pm is right smack in the middle of naptime! How can she try to avoid naptime when she shows up right in the middle of it?
And we did a craft today and I gave it to her and she took it without even commenting on it or anything. She looked at me funny too. I dont know. I hate parents sometimes because I know they can have on days and off days but I just think its rude to not say anything to me the entire time she's in my house picking up her son.
But other times, she talks to me great and normal and tells me about her week and all that, like its nothing. I guess there's nothing to do but blow it off but its just weird....and I dont like defending myself, even if I dont say anything outloud to her at the time. I dont like feeling like Ive done something wrong.
ninosqueridos 10:10 AM 03-11-2011
I would tell her to come after 2pm. It would probably eliminate that "oh, Little Johnny, are you so very cold?" comments and such. That would really annoy me. And I also don't allow DCPs to just come right in and wake up their kids (if they do happen to arrive during nap if they get out of work early or something). They wait by the door until *I* get their little sweet pea. 
daycare 10:14 AM 03-11-2011
Originally Posted by Greenshadow:
I have a little boy that Ive been watching for almost a year now. Ive gotten to know them well and the mom and I get along great. The weird thing is some days it seems like she comes in in a bad mood and Im never sure if its something Ive done or not.
For example, she normally gets here at around 1:30-2:00, which is toward the end of nap time. Whenever I open the door and tell her that they are asleep, she kinda rolls her eyes like she doesnt like having to pick him up when he is asleep. Well, she's the one that chooses to come at that time; not me! Some days she comes and its later, like 2:30 or 3pm, and they've been up and had snack and are playing.
Today she showed up during nap time and when she came in to get him I told her that they'd only been napping for about an hour because we were playing and doing things that kept them up later. She never commented to me at all but went straight to her son and started trying to wake him up. They played in finger paints today and I took their shirts off because the smocks i usually use were not cleaned. When naptime came around, they didnt want to put their shirts back on so I didnt argue it. I pick my battles! She likes to talk to her 2 year old while she's trying to wake him up but it seems like she's really talking to me. Ever get parents like that? Anyway, she said something about him being cold because she thought he was shivering. My house is sitting at 75 degrees and Im always cold and I wasnt so he was fine. Obviously I would have put shirts on them had I felt that they were going to be cold. Then she said something after she got him up and was getting his shoes on about how she tries to come when he's not sleeping but its hit or miss....Ummm, coming between 12-2pm is right smack in the middle of naptime! How can she try to avoid naptime when she shows up right in the middle of it?
And we did a craft today and I gave it to her and she took it without even commenting on it or anything. She looked at me funny too. I dont know. I hate parents sometimes because I know they can have on days and off days but I just think its rude to not say anything to me the entire time she's in my house picking up her son.
But other times, she talks to me great and normal and tells me about her week and all that, like its nothing. I guess there's nothing to do but blow it off but its just weird....and I dont like defending myself, even if I dont say anything outloud to her at the time. I dont like feeling like Ive done something wrong.
I have learned not to expect anything from anyone and always do your best to just kill them with kindness. I dont take things personal. I have a little boy that Ive been watching for almost a year now. Ive gotten to know them well and the mom and I get along great. The weird thing is some days it seems like she comes in in a bad mood and Im never sure if its something Ive done or not.
For example, she normally gets here at around 1:30-2:00, which is toward the end of nap time. Whenever I open the door and tell her that they are asleep, she kinda rolls her eyes like she doesnt like having to pick him up when he is asleep. Well, she's the one that chooses to come at that time; not me! Some days she comes and its later, like 2:30 or 3pm, and they've been up and had snack and are playing.
Today she showed up during nap time and when she came in to get him I told her that they'd only been napping for about an hour because we were playing and doing things that kept them up later. She never commented to me at all but went straight to her son and started trying to wake him up. They played in finger paints today and I took their shirts off because the smocks i usually use were not cleaned. When naptime came around, they didnt want to put their shirts back on so I didnt argue it. I pick my battles! She likes to talk to her 2 year old while she's trying to wake him up but it seems like she's really talking to me. Ever get parents like that? Anyway, she said something about him being cold because she thought he was shivering. My house is sitting at 75 degrees and Im always cold and I wasnt so he was fine. Obviously I would have put shirts on them had I felt that they were going to be cold. Then she said something after she got him up and was getting his shoes on about how she tries to come when he's not sleeping but its hit or miss....Ummm, coming between 12-2pm is right smack in the middle of naptime! How can she try to avoid naptime when she shows up right in the middle of it?
And we did a craft today and I gave it to her and she took it without even commenting on it or anything. She looked at me funny too. I dont know. I hate parents sometimes because I know they can have on days and off days but I just think its rude to not say anything to me the entire time she's in my house picking up her son.
But other times, she talks to me great and normal and tells me about her week and all that, like its nothing. I guess there's nothing to do but blow it off but its just weird....and I dont like defending myself, even if I dont say anything outloud to her at the time. I dont like feeling like Ive done something wrong.
I am not here for friends, I am here to run a business
Michelle 10:16 AM 03-11-2011
I would have given him a hug goodbye and "talked through him" by saying..."mommy needs to come after nap time"
Little People 10:21 AM 03-11-2011
I have a school dcm and 2 days a week she could be here at 1:00 but at our interview I told her "I don't allow pick ups during nap" and she comes at 2:15, so it gives me time to get nap mats all picked up. She will sometimes get here at 2:05, but she waits till I open my door. She is really sweet about it.
Now if a parent MUST pick up because of an emerengcy or something they will text me and I will have the child at the door. I door have an open door policy but ALL my parents are great and want their children to get the entire nap out.
Now if a parent MUST pick up because of an emerengcy or something they will text me and I will have the child at the door. I door have an open door policy but ALL my parents are great and want their children to get the entire nap out.
ninosqueridos 10:22 AM 03-11-2011
Originally Posted by Michelle:
I would have given him a hug goodbye and "talked through him" by saying..."mommy needs to come after nap time"
I would have given him a hug goodbye and "talked through him" by saying..."mommy needs to come after nap time"
Greenshadow 10:26 AM 03-11-2011
I do talk through her and I ignore the comments she makes.
Update: I called her and asked her if things are going okay today for her. I noticed she was in a funky mood and wanted to be sure everything was okay. We talked about her personal stuff but her problem is that her son screams and cries when she leaves to take him home and asks for milk and a snack and screams and throws a fit on the car ride home because she doesnt have it everyday to give him. Some days she does.
My compromise to her: Call me when you are on your way here to pick him up so I can get him up and ready to go before you get here. I can have him his sippy cup ready to go and a small snack for the ride home. Maybe that will remedy the problem.
But I let her know to come to me with issues and not just try things without communicating them with me too. We're in this together. She was so glad I called and thanked me for the call and apologized for her behavior. She said it just gets frustrating having to listen to him scream everyday when she picks him up.
Update: I called her and asked her if things are going okay today for her. I noticed she was in a funky mood and wanted to be sure everything was okay. We talked about her personal stuff but her problem is that her son screams and cries when she leaves to take him home and asks for milk and a snack and screams and throws a fit on the car ride home because she doesnt have it everyday to give him. Some days she does.
My compromise to her: Call me when you are on your way here to pick him up so I can get him up and ready to go before you get here. I can have him his sippy cup ready to go and a small snack for the ride home. Maybe that will remedy the problem.
But I let her know to come to me with issues and not just try things without communicating them with me too. We're in this together. She was so glad I called and thanked me for the call and apologized for her behavior. She said it just gets frustrating having to listen to him scream everyday when she picks him up.
nannyde 11:09 AM 03-11-2011
Originally Posted by Greenshadow:
I do talk through her and I ignore the comments she makes.
Update: I called her and asked her if things are going okay today for her. I noticed she was in a funky mood and wanted to be sure everything was okay. We talked about her personal stuff but her problem is that her son screams and cries when she leaves to take him home and asks for milk and a snack and screams and throws a fit on the car ride home because she doesnt have it everyday to give him. Some days she does.
My compromise to her: Call me when you are on your way here to pick him up so I can get him up and ready to go before you get here. I can have him his sippy cup ready to go and a small snack for the ride home. Maybe that will remedy the problem.
But I let her know to come to me with issues and not just try things without communicating them with me too. We're in this together. She was so glad I called and thanked me for the call and apologized for her behavior. She said it just gets frustrating having to listen to him scream everyday when she picks him up.
I wouldn't offer the cup and snack. It won't be long until what you have to offer isn't good enough and the fight will go to the next level.I do talk through her and I ignore the comments she makes.
Update: I called her and asked her if things are going okay today for her. I noticed she was in a funky mood and wanted to be sure everything was okay. We talked about her personal stuff but her problem is that her son screams and cries when she leaves to take him home and asks for milk and a snack and screams and throws a fit on the car ride home because she doesnt have it everyday to give him. Some days she does.
My compromise to her: Call me when you are on your way here to pick him up so I can get him up and ready to go before you get here. I can have him his sippy cup ready to go and a small snack for the ride home. Maybe that will remedy the problem.
But I let her know to come to me with issues and not just try things without communicating them with me too. We're in this together. She was so glad I called and thanked me for the call and apologized for her behavior. She said it just gets frustrating having to listen to him scream everyday when she picks him up.
Have her call you when she's five minutes out and get him ready to go. Scoot him out the door and let her take it from there.
It's JUST this generation of kids that need sippy and snack for a car ride home. If he's had a decent lunch and his ride isn't over 30 minutes he should be fine in the car till they get home. If she wants to give him special then she needs to come up with something that can keep in her car for him every day.
Blackcat31 11:59 AM 03-11-2011
^^^What she said ^^^
Crystal 12:11 PM 03-11-2011
I agree with Nannyde. There is absolutely no need for a snack and drink in the car. Get him up give, give hime some water to drink before he leaves and be done with it.
One of my biggest concerns is children eating in the car. Mom is DRIVING. God forbid a child, strapped in a carseat in the back of the car, should CHOKE while Mom is not paying attention. And even if she notices, taking time to pull over, unstrap the careseat and get the child out to do the heimlich could make it impossible to get to him in time. It scares the heck out of me!!!
One of my biggest concerns is children eating in the car. Mom is DRIVING. God forbid a child, strapped in a carseat in the back of the car, should CHOKE while Mom is not paying attention. And even if she notices, taking time to pull over, unstrap the careseat and get the child out to do the heimlich could make it impossible to get to him in time. It scares the heck out of me!!!
momma2girls 12:14 PM 03-11-2011
I actually had to place this in my contract about a yr. ago. One parent would always make her dr. appts. , etc. during nap. She used to come in , wake up my daughter, and not think nothing of it. She was so loud as well. From now on, no pick ups or drop offs, during naptime.
Cat Herder 12:14 PM 03-11-2011
Originally Posted by Crystal:
I agree with Nannyde. There is absolutely no need for a snack and drink in the car. Get him up give, give hime some water to drink before he leaves and be done with it.
One of my biggest concerns is children eating in the car. Mom is DRIVING. God forbid a child, strapped in a carseat in the back of the car, should CHOKE while Mom is not paying attention. And even if she notices, taking time to pull over, unstrap the careseat and get the child out to do the heimlich could make it impossible to get to him in time. It scares the heck out of me!!!
This is true....I agree with Nannyde. There is absolutely no need for a snack and drink in the car. Get him up give, give hime some water to drink before he leaves and be done with it.
One of my biggest concerns is children eating in the car. Mom is DRIVING. God forbid a child, strapped in a carseat in the back of the car, should CHOKE while Mom is not paying attention. And even if she notices, taking time to pull over, unstrap the careseat and get the child out to do the heimlich could make it impossible to get to him in time. It scares the heck out of me!!!
One of our worst choking cases was a child who had been "cheeking" animal crackers. Mom hit the brakes because a car stopped short, kid gasped.
It formed such a think cement like wad that it took two people with forcepts and finger sweeping to open his airway...
That was scary enough to stick with me for life....
kendallina 12:15 PM 03-11-2011
Originally Posted by Greenshadow:
I do talk through her and I ignore the comments she makes.
Update: I called her and asked her if things are going okay today for her. I noticed she was in a funky mood and wanted to be sure everything was okay. We talked about her personal stuff but her problem is that her son screams and cries when she leaves to take him home and asks for milk and a snack and screams and throws a fit on the car ride home because she doesnt have it everyday to give him. Some days she does.
My compromise to her: Call me when you are on your way here to pick him up so I can get him up and ready to go before you get here. I can have him his sippy cup ready to go and a small snack for the ride home. Maybe that will remedy the problem.
But I let her know to come to me with issues and not just try things without communicating them with me too. We're in this together. She was so glad I called and thanked me for the call and apologized for her behavior. She said it just gets frustrating having to listen to him scream everyday when she picks him up.
I think you handled it great. Open communication is what we all want, isn't it? And you did just that. I do talk through her and I ignore the comments she makes.
Update: I called her and asked her if things are going okay today for her. I noticed she was in a funky mood and wanted to be sure everything was okay. We talked about her personal stuff but her problem is that her son screams and cries when she leaves to take him home and asks for milk and a snack and screams and throws a fit on the car ride home because she doesnt have it everyday to give him. Some days she does.
My compromise to her: Call me when you are on your way here to pick him up so I can get him up and ready to go before you get here. I can have him his sippy cup ready to go and a small snack for the ride home. Maybe that will remedy the problem.
But I let her know to come to me with issues and not just try things without communicating them with me too. We're in this together. She was so glad I called and thanked me for the call and apologized for her behavior. She said it just gets frustrating having to listen to him scream everyday when she picks him up.
I do agree with Nannyde that I probably wouldn't have offered to have a snack ready for him, because that's just one more thing for you to do and it's your food and all of that. But, then again, it's really not so hard to get around a couple of crackers... So, anyways, nice job!
nannyde 12:20 PM 03-11-2011
Originally Posted by kendallina:
I think you handled it great. Open communication is what we all want, isn't it? And you did just that.
I do agree with Nannyde that I probably wouldn't have offered to have a snack ready for him, because that's just one more thing for you to do and it's your food and all of that. But, then again, it's really not so hard to get around a couple of crackers... So, anyways, nice job!
I don't like the idea of being responsible for what a kid is eating in the back seat of a car. NO food from day care.I think you handled it great. Open communication is what we all want, isn't it? And you did just that.
I do agree with Nannyde that I probably wouldn't have offered to have a snack ready for him, because that's just one more thing for you to do and it's your food and all of that. But, then again, it's really not so hard to get around a couple of crackers... So, anyways, nice job!
Live and Learn 12:29 PM 03-11-2011
If it is such a big deal to this parent that HER child have a snack and sippy cup then she should fix it herself. Apparently it is a big enough deal for her to have YOU fix the snack/sippy but not enough of a big deal to have to do it HERSELF. 
Greenshadow: You are more generous than I am.
Greenshadow: You are more generous than I am.
DBug 03:54 PM 03-11-2011
Greenshadow, I'd likely do what you did and offer to have a snack and cup ready to go at pick-up. But the others make a good point about the choking possibility.
What about waking him up and getting him dressed to leave, and then giving him a cracker or two right before dc mom arrives? That way he'll have had time to actually wake up and clear the brain fog, and get something in his tummy too. Hopefully he'd be a little happier for the ride home?
What about waking him up and getting him dressed to leave, and then giving him a cracker or two right before dc mom arrives? That way he'll have had time to actually wake up and clear the brain fog, and get something in his tummy too. Hopefully he'd be a little happier for the ride home?
Greenshadow 03:56 AM 03-12-2011
Yes thats probably what I'll do. Just have a small cup of milk for him and a couple crackers. Nothing to leave with but something to have to wake him up while mom gets here. Then mom can have something in the car to go if she wants.
Thanks guys. I hadnt thought about the choking hazard from the ride home. Good thing we dont eat in my van, as a rule anyway, just because I dont like the trash and crumbs everywhere - or the smell afterward!
Thanks guys. I hadnt thought about the choking hazard from the ride home. Good thing we dont eat in my van, as a rule anyway, just because I dont like the trash and crumbs everywhere - or the smell afterward!
kendallina 04:27 AM 03-12-2011
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I don't like the idea of being responsible for what a kid is eating in the back seat of a car. NO food from day care.
Yeh, that is a good point.I don't like the idea of being responsible for what a kid is eating in the back seat of a car. NO food from day care.