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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>New 11 Year Old Girl...
littlemisssunshine 06:41 PM 07-27-2012
So she started this Monday ad everything was great she liked it and had fun, she came to me because she would never want to go to her old daycare the little girl said he old daycare teacher would scream and hit all the kids... Anyway today she wanted to go with her mom and doesn't want to come anymOre with me.. Is there anything I can do to help her? What would you do?
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cheerfuldom 06:45 PM 07-27-2012
Originally Posted by littlemisssunshine:
So she started this Monday ad everything was great she liked it and had fun, she came to me because she would never want to go to her old daycare the little girl said he old daycare teacher would scream and hit all the kids... Anyway today she wanted to go with her mom and doesn't want to come anymOre with me.. Is there anything I can do to help her? What would you do?
did mom say what is going on with her?
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littlemisssunshine 06:50 PM 07-27-2012
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
did mom say what is going on with her?
No, the girl said she wanted to go home
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Breezy 07:06 PM 07-27-2012
Could be just tired of daycare for the week and knows tomorrow is the weekend and she was ready!
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MizzCheryl 02:57 AM 07-28-2012
Did you have to correct her any?
Could be a player? Only wants to come as long as things go her way.
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Heidi 07:12 AM 07-28-2012
She's 11, not 2. She may very well be bored, but that's the way it is sometimes.

Did you talk to mom about it? It's probably time to have a conversation without dcg present. Next thing you know, YOU"LL be the one who hits and yells!
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Truly Scrumptious 08:18 AM 07-28-2012
I agree with Clueless....sounds like a player. And the fact that mom didn't offer an explanation tells me she knows it.
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countrymom 09:29 AM 07-28-2012
I think at 11 she needs to go to a camp NOT daycare. And I know for a fact that the word "daycare" embarresses her too (I have my own that age) doesnt matter what you do, she needs to be with kids her age. Daycamps are pretty cheap and run long hours.
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youretooloud 10:25 AM 07-28-2012
Originally Posted by countrymom:
I think at 11 she needs to go to a camp NOT daycare. And I know for a fact that the word "daycare" embarresses her too (I have my own that age) doesnt matter what you do, she needs to be with kids her age. Daycamps are pretty cheap and run long hours.
Exactly. She doesn't need to be in daycare. She needs her parents to try to plan a great summer for her. I realize that in some areas, that's impossible. But, at eleven, she's too old for daycare.

At that age, I was staying home alone, and playing with friends all day. But, these days, maybe if she had camp for a few weeks, vacation for a few weeks, summer school, go visit grandparents or family for a few weeks. I would be finding a way to fill my kid's summer even if it's inconvenient for me.

I wish our area had decent summer camps, but, even though we are a huge city, there really isn't anything kids can do for the summers.

Honestly, at 11, i'd let her sleep in, and go home at lunch, then take her to a summer program for the afternoon, and pick her up again after work. Or, i'd hire a teenager to come hang out with my 11 yr old.
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Heidi 10:45 AM 07-29-2012
I was thinking about this, and agree she is too old for dc.

Maybe you could make her your helper for the rest of the summer, and "pay" her somehow?

Years ago I had a neighbor girl that age. Kind of too young to be home alone all summer, but too old for daycare. So, she was my summer helper. I didn't pay her, and her mom didn't pay me. At the end of the summer, I gave her a little gift of some sort and a thank you card.

She LOVED playing with the babies, dressing my daughter (who was a year at the time), running errands for me, pushing the stroller, etc. She'd show up at about 9:30 or 10 in the morning, and leave late afternoon. She ate with us, and if she had other plans for a day, that was fine, too.

She's a facebook friend, which is cool. She's 26 now and has a husband and little girl...
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MizzCheryl 01:00 PM 07-29-2012
I have kept kids up to 14 years old and have a 13 yr old now. I have a 15 year old that still visits for the day with sis because she loves coming. Yeah some kids may need daycamp but not always. The smaller kids can learn from the older kis and the smaller kids love them. Even the boys I have kept like the babies and the toddlers and preschoolers. They help out but I do not make them My helper. I am the only boss. At nap they lie down and have reading time for at least 30 minutes till I set up other activities and get a break.

Players want things on their terms and want "special". They will use not wanting to come to get you to do "special" for them, then your stuck keeping them happy. I just say "OK" I give them no special for complaining. If mom wants to move them it won't hurt my feelings. But when they find out the complaing doesn't get them anything special they stop.

One girl used to always say "I'm bored" I said "Do not say that. If you are bored that is because you choose to be." I do not allow her to complain.
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saved4always 01:06 PM 07-29-2012
Originally Posted by countrymom:
I think at 11 she needs to go to a camp NOT daycare. And I know for a fact that the word "daycare" embarresses her too (I have my own that age) doesnt matter what you do, she needs to be with kids her age. Daycamps are pretty cheap and run long hours.
This exactly. My 10 yo goes to camp a couple days a week while I work at the same daycare. It is called a summer camp with activities planned for her age group and she actually enjoys it. She is a "mama's girl" so I fully expected her to complain all summer, but, she has been fine with going. This could very well be what this 11 yo needs.
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MizzCheryl 01:08 PM 07-29-2012
Originally Posted by countrymom:
I think at 11 she needs to go to a camp NOT daycare. And I know for a fact that the word "daycare" embarresses her too (I have my own that age) doesnt matter what you do, she needs to be with kids her age. Daycamps are pretty cheap and run long hours.
Could be she is embarrased.
But I have to share a cute thing. I ran into a boy I used to keep at the store. He is 16 now. He was with a friend and hugged me and introduced me as his babysitter. He said hey this is my baby sitter. He stayed with me from ages 5 to 12. hehe
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saved4always 01:20 PM 07-29-2012
Originally Posted by Clueless:


Could be she is embarrased.
But I have to share a cute thing. I ran into a boy I used to keep at the store. He is 16 now. He was with a friend and hugged me and introduced me as his babysitter. He said hey this is my baby sitter. He stayed with me from ages 5 to 12. hehe
That is so cute. I love it when kids I watched from the neighborhood years ago still yell "Hi, Miss M" when my husband and I walk by.
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providerandmomof4 08:01 PM 07-29-2012
Originally Posted by Clueless:
I have kept kids up to 14 years old and have a 13 yr old now. I have a 15 year old that still visits for the day with sis because she loves coming. Yeah some kids may need daycamp but not always. The smaller kids can learn from the older kis and the smaller kids love them. Even the boys I have kept like the babies and the toddlers and preschoolers. They help out but I do not make them My helper. I am the only boss. At nap they lie down and have reading time for at least 30 minutes till I set up other activities and get a break.

Players want things on their terms and want "special". They will use not wanting to come to get you to do "special" for them, then your stuck keeping them happy. I just say "OK" I give them no special for complaining. If mom wants to move them it won't hurt my feelings. But when they find out the complaing doesn't get them anything special they stop.

One girl used to always say "I'm bored" I said "Do not say that. If you are bored that is because you choose to be." I do not allow her to complain.
I totally agree with Clueless. I've come to learn the more I cater to the older kids and feed into the "I'm bored" the more they do it. Next thing I know I'm making myself crazy trying to entertain them. I had to put a stop to it.
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