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Unregistered 01:01 PM 04-07-2021
I have a child in care who is 6. All my other children are younger. This child from the start has been a challenge. She is mean to all the other kids. She's hit kids and today kicked one hard enough to make them fall and cry. This child in particular doesn't just cry for anything either. I have talked to mom in past about her. Mom pleaded for me not to terminate because her younger sibling loves it here. She does stuff just to do it. Nobody is doing anything to her but she just likes to pick on and hurt others. My own child is in care of course and she especially likes to pick on her. What should I do? I'm going to talk with mom today at pick up, and was thinking to give her a written warning. Three strikes and your out type thing. Any advice?? Please anything helps.
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Blackcat31 01:13 PM 04-07-2021
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have a child in care who is 6. All my other children are younger. This child from the start has been a challenge. She is mean to all the other kids. She's hit kids and today kicked one hard enough to make them fall and cry. This child in particular doesn't just cry for anything either. I have talked to mom in past about her. Mom pleaded for me not to terminate because her younger sibling loves it here. She does stuff just to do it. Nobody is doing anything to her but she just likes to pick on and hurt others. My own child is in care of course and she especially likes to pick on her. What should I do? I'm going to talk with mom today at pick up, and was thinking to give her a written warning. Three strikes and your out type thing. Any advice?? Please anything helps.
ANY child old enough to understand that hitting is wrong would be terminated immediately for purposely hurting others.

If I were in your shoes, I would term today. Let mom know you can not risk other children being hurt by her 6 yr old. Using the fact that her younger child likes it there is silly... I'd even let mom know the younger one can remain enrolled but the older one needs to go.

If you don't terminate, you risk losing the other families of the children this child hurts so weigh your options; lose a 6yr old (and possibly her sibling) or risk losing other families AND possibly your reputation if word gets around.

If mom didn't address this previously (when threatened with termination) why would a 3 strikes you are out note make any difference?
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Unregistered 01:19 PM 04-07-2021
Blackcat31, yes I agree. I don't want my reputation to be bad because I give chances to children who know better. Thank you!
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e.j. 01:47 PM 04-07-2021
I agree with Blackcat and also want to add that your own child deserves to feel safe in her own home. She shouldn't have to put up with being dcg's target.
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Blackcat31 03:07 PM 04-07-2021
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Blackcat31, yes I agree. I don't want my reputation to be bad because I give chances to children who know better. Thank you!
Hang in there... This is the tough part of this job but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do to make YOUR life (and your own family's) better/safe.

You will never be sorry for putting YOUR family first!
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Sunshine69 07:31 AM 04-09-2021
I would terminate care, too.

Sorry, daycare kids arenít here to bully my kids.

Way too much liability if this child is intentionally hurting others too.
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Gemma 08:48 AM 04-09-2021
I agree with the others above
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Josiegirl 03:50 AM 04-10-2021
Sadly I agree. I recall way too many instances where I should've let a child go. By 6 they should have a bit more internal control than that.
I know dcproviders say 'outgrown the program' quite often but I feel, if all the other dcks are 4 and under, then he's done exactly that and needs to be with more children his own age.
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Tags:terminate - bad behavior, violence in child care, violent child
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