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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>4 years old, having constant accidents
jenny31052 06:17 AM 11-30-2011
I have a 4 years old that started yesterday (girl). Supposed to be potty trained. However she was only able to make it to the bathroom twice yesteday. She had 2 accidents (pee), and one this morning, 30 minutes after drop off.
I ask her every hour or less to go to the restroom, she goes, sit on the toilet, says that she doesn't need to go, then has an accident soon after.

I'm puzzled...
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Cat Herder 06:21 AM 11-30-2011
The change of routine and anxiety could easily cause it.

I'd put her back in pull-ups, discreetly (away from the other kids), and tell her that when she goes a week or two without accidents she can go back to panties at your house.

This is NOT punishment. Act like it is no big deal...happens to us all..... make it as casual as humanly possible.
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mickey2 06:43 AM 11-30-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
The change of routine and anxiety could easily cause it.

I'd put her back in pull-ups, discreetly (away from the other kids), and tell her that when she goes a week or two without accidents she can go back to panties at your house.

This is NOT punishment. Act like it is no big deal...happens to us all..... make it as casual as humanly possible.

I completely agree with this!
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Unregistered 07:22 AM 11-30-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
The change of routine and anxiety could easily cause it.

I'd put her back in pull-ups, discreetly (away from the other kids), and tell her that when she goes a week or two without accidents she can go back to panties at your house.

This is NOT punishment. Act like it is no big deal...happens to us all..... make it as casual as humanly possible.
NO WAY should you put this child in pull ups that would be taking a step backwards big time and hello she is 4 YEARS OLD. Maybe the parents need to take her to docs to see if she has a bladder infection. If she is new to daycare this could be one of the reasons also maybe she isnt comfortable yet to ask to use the bathroom and maybe afraid of her new surroundings.
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sahm2three 09:02 AM 11-30-2011
Try having a before and after school kid who is 7 who has constant accidents! Probably about 2 days a week I pick him up from school and he has had a poop accident at school. My almost 4 year old just had an accident while sitting on my couch. Ugh. I am ready for this week to be over. Sorry to hijack your post OP, hugs to you. No advice.
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Heidi 09:07 AM 11-30-2011
Put the pullups over her panties, that way she will still feel wet, but your sanity is saved. At 4, she probably WANTS to use the potty. I don't think pullups will give her license to regress, especially if she has panties on underneath. She is just distracted right now. My 3yo dcg was independent when she came here in June, but the first month, she had a few accidents. She hasn't had one for months now...

You can mention the bladder infection, but I'd be betting it's the stress of change.
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mac60 09:18 AM 11-30-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
NO WAY should you put this child in pull ups that would be taking a step backwards big time and hello she is 4 YEARS OLD. Maybe the parents need to take her to docs to see if she has a bladder infection. If she is new to daycare this could be one of the reasons also maybe she isnt comfortable yet to ask to use the bathroom and maybe afraid of her new surroundings.
No way should you allow a 4 year old to have repeated accidents in your home. Well, unless the parents are going to replace your flooring, furniture and anything else the child ruins. Seriously, unregistered, to allow a 4 yr old to freely pee in your home. YUCK! Yes, something must be going on, but it is not the childcare providers responsibilty to have her home ruined while the parents try to figure it out.
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Cat Herder 10:01 AM 11-30-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
NO WAY should you put this child in pull ups that would be taking a step backwards big time and hello she is 4 YEARS OLD. Maybe the parents need to take her to docs to see if she has a bladder infection. If she is new to daycare this could be one of the reasons also maybe she isn't comfortable yet to ask to use the bathroom and maybe afraid of her new surroundings.
That is my policy.... Agreed to and signed by parents prior to enrollment.

I must maintain sanitary conditions for infants/toddlers crawling on the floor and I cannot do that by allowing anyone to urinate/defecate on them. This is an easily PREVENTABLE route of illness transmission.

Yes, parents will be informed of the issue and IF I suspected an infection (based on symptoms that I am medically trained to recognize) that would also be brought to their attention. I offer services to Medically Brittle/ Special Needs kids from birth to age 4, but this policy benefits EVERYONE.

Potty training regression is a very common issue with changing providers (lifestyle changes in general) and is a part of our mandatory annual training.

Taking a step "backwards" for a couple weeks every now and then is not as big a risk as Coxsakie Virus in the bigger picture of GROUP CARE, IMHO. I also think that wearing absorbant material in much less humiliating than peeing down your legs drawing the attention of every other child in the room. It really is more about personal beliefs... I have never really known a kid to CARE what material they wear on their bums UNLESS an ADULT makes it a big issue.
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newtodaycare22 10:09 AM 11-30-2011
I've had this happen with a few 3 year olds when transitioning to me. Praise from the parents and myself was the key. It's a phase. Parents talked about it at home, asked the child to walk them to the bathroom in the morning (at pick up), and made a HUGE deal at the end of the day. "YOU HAD NO ACCIDENTS?! Maybe we'll go to the park for a while after dinner"

It'll pass. One of my 3.5 year olds had a phase of it for about 2 weeks and then it stopped. Everyone once in a while she still thinks back and brags to mom at pick up "MOMMY NO ACCIDENTS!" (She's now 4.5 )
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Nellie 01:34 PM 11-30-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
The change of routine and anxiety could easily cause it.

I'd put her back in pull-ups, discreetly (away from the other kids), and tell her that when she goes a week or two without accidents she can go back to panties at your house.

This is NOT punishment. Act like it is no big deal...happens to us all..... make it as casual as humanly possible.


This is good advice. Just wondering if you are in the bathroom with her? If you are, perhaps she needs privacy. Also if she is just quickly sitting and standing up right away, perhaps encourage her to sit for a little bit(I'm just pulling this out of the air).

I'd never let a kid have accidents all over the house. For the most part pee is sterile but it takes a good washing to get the smell out. Not to mention if you don't get it right away and it is dripping every where they walk and sit. I'd imagine a pull up is a lot less embarrassing than every one knowing she peed her pants. None of the other kids will ever know she has a pull up on.
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daycare 01:46 PM 11-30-2011
peeing in a pull up and no one knowing about it, is A LOT less embarrassing than everyone having to move to a different room so that the DCP can clean up the mess, then have to change the kids clothes.

I vote for the PULL UP over the Undies..

Also try leaving the bathroom light on and let her go in alone, but leave the door open enough for you to peek in if needed.

I had a 5 year old that started peeing his pants when he first came to my house because the hallway was dark and the bathroom light was always off. It scared him so he didn't want to go into the bathroom...
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Tags:coxsackie, hand foot and mouth, potty accidents, potty training advice, potty training policy
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