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Cozy_Kids_Childcare 03:10 AM 09-15-2014
Do you ever feel stuck in being a provider? I have this issue every 6-months it seems. I will put out resumes, go to interviews just to be disappointed. The pay is either way too low or the hours are awful for someone with small children. Then my husband punches holes in my plan or brings up some detail I forgot about and then I just give up hope. I know my problem with being a provider is that I have to share my daycare space with my living room. My youngest will start the pre-k program (hopefully) next fall but the hours are so crazy that I will probably have to do daycare another year or so. My other issue with stopping daycare is that when the big breaks come like Christmas and Spring I won't be able to take off the entire time. My husband will hopefully start a new job I. The coming weeks and he won't be able to take off like he did in the military. I'm scared that by time I'm able to return to the workforce I won't make the money I think another issue I have is that I miss things at my kids school all the time because I am home taking care of other peoples kids. I use to take my daycare kids to the school for special assembly things but now I have parents that don't want their kids transported which I totally understand. I can't be the only one who has this feeling. I have friends that have been doing daycare 15-22 years and they said they have all had these ups and downs and it just comes with the territory. I've been doing daycare almost 4-years so I'm still fairly green to the emotional ride of this. My older two kids get bent out of shape when I even talk to my husband about an outside job. I've thought about waiting till my youngest starts Kindergarten to substitute teach until I finish my degree then that way I'm home when they are off. Then I start thinking well if I had a separate daycare space would my feelings change. Please tell me I'm not alone.
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Play Care 03:25 AM 09-15-2014
Originally Posted by Cozy_Kids_Childcare:
Do you ever feel stuck in being a provider? I have this issue every 6-months it seems. I will put out resumes, go to interviews just to be disappointed. The pay is either way too low or the hours are awful for someone with small children. Then my husband punches holes in my plan or brings up some detail I forgot about and then I just give up hope. I know my problem with being a provider is that I have to share my daycare space with my living room. My youngest will start the pre-k program (hopefully) next fall but the hours are so crazy that I will probably have to do daycare another year or so. My other issue with stopping daycare is that when the big breaks come like Christmas and Spring I won't be able to take off the entire time. My husband will hopefully start a new job I. The coming weeks and he won't be able to take off like he did in the military. I'm scared that by time I'm able to return to the workforce I won't make the money I think another issue I have is that I miss things at my kids school all the time because I am home taking care of other peoples kids. I use to take my daycare kids to the school for special assembly things but now I have parents that don't want their kids transported which I totally understand. I can't be the only one who has this feeling. I have friends that have been doing daycare 15-22 years and they said they have all had these ups and downs and it just comes with the territory. I've been doing daycare almost 4-years so I'm still fairly green to the emotional ride of this. My older two kids get bent out of shape when I even talk to my husband about an outside job. I've thought about waiting till my youngest starts Kindergarten to substitute teach until I finish my degree then that way I'm home when they are off. Then I start thinking well if I had a separate daycare space would my feelings change. Please tell me I'm not alone.


You're not! My own kids are 8 & 9 - I'm going through the renewal process for being licensed right now which will be good for 4 years, and then I'm OUT. By that time my kids will be older and capable of being home by themselves for periods of time. I've found that the only reason I take so much of the school vacations off is because it's harder to do day care and have my family home at the same time (DH is a teacher) not necessarily because I WANT/NEED to take the time off, KWIM? If I had a separate space I might be more inclined to keep going, but with my home that's not possible.
Since my kids are older now, a few things I've been doing are volunteering at our local library, and applying for a PT job with the big library in the city closest to us. This give me "real" job experience to add to my resume.
I'm also at the age where money isn't the the big factor - I would also consider the bennies that I don't get as self employed. I would love retirement options.
I DO think there is a "grass is always greener" aspect to every job - and that no matter what you do there will be the "what if" factor. So every so often I try to do a pros/cons list - it's nice to have it in black and white.
Anyway I hope you are able to figure something out that makes you happy!!
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coolconfidentme 03:37 AM 09-15-2014
I think it goes with the time of the year for me. Feb is the hardest with being shut in & wanting to be outside more.
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DaveA 04:09 AM 09-15-2014
Originally Posted by coolconfidentme:
I think it goes with the time of the year for me.
I've noticed this also. For me it's early March. Usually lasts a couple of weeks then I'm over it.
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Cozy_Kids_Childcare 04:34 AM 09-15-2014
Originally Posted by Play Care:


You're not! My own kids are 8 & 9 - I'm going through the renewal process for being licensed right now which will be good for 4 years, and then I'm OUT. By that time my kids will be older and capable of being home by themselves for periods of time. I've found that the only reason I take so much of the school vacations off is because it's harder to do day care and have my family home at the same time (DH is a teacher) not necessarily because I WANT/NEED to take the time off, KWIM? If I had a separate space I might be more inclined to keep going, but with my home that's not possible.
Since my kids are older now, a few things I've been doing are volunteering at our local library, and applying for a PT job with the big library in the city closest to us. This give me "real" job experience to add to my resume.
I'm also at the age where money isn't the the big factor - I would also consider the bennies that I don't get as self employed. I would love retirement options.
I DO think there is a "grass is always greener" aspect to every job - and that no matter what you do there will be the "what if" factor. So every so often I try to do a pros/cons list - it's nice to have it in black and white.
Anyway I hope you are able to figure something out that makes you happy!!
Mine are 13/9/3.5. I'm only 33, but I think about retirement and at what point will my medical background experience not be enough to return to the workforce. I've been in school for three years now so hopefully I'll be able to transition into teaching when I'm done. I'm a big pro/con list person myself. There are so many positives to being able to do this job. I was telling my husband last night I wish sometimes that I could be a stay at home mom and go do the PTA thing and be "that mom". He was like you would hate it because you'd have to be around people taller than 3 feet. He thinks I would make a great teacher because I love working with kids. It's the adults i would have a hard time with.
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Cozy_Kids_Childcare 04:38 AM 09-15-2014
Originally Posted by coolconfidentme:
I think it goes with the time of the year for me. Feb is the hardest with being shut in & wanting to be outside more.
I think your right. Mine is September and usually again mid April. It's like I get bored or something. I love my kids and I think I'm a little jealous of people having freedom to go out to lunch with co-workers. They can take off to go watch their kids class assembly things and then go back to work. If I take off it disrupts everything and is a pain.
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EntropyControlSpecialist 05:40 AM 09-15-2014
I have periods of time like this, too.

I have noticed that having a particularly difficult child in care (perhaps one that I just don't mesh well with) can really amplify that feeling...so, on that note, I have been ensuring that I DON'T have a child like that in care.


Also, have you looked at somewhat shortening your hours if it is a possibility?
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Naptime yet? 07:14 AM 09-15-2014
I think it's hard to not focus on the money, but what makes you happy.

I am so done with daycare and it's only been 2 years (yup, the average). I have a plan, but my DH sounds like yours, he's alwAys throwing a wrench into it. I never wanted to do daycare long term, only until my youngest hits kindergarten, so I was planning to be done by next year anyway.

I am envious of providers who do this for years and excel at it. I am not one of them .

You are not alone.
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Blackcat31 07:35 AM 09-15-2014
I think this is more common for providers who are only in this field until their own are in school.

If it's not a job you can do long term, then short term is like a prison sentence.

Sorry you are feeling so trapped.
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Shell 07:45 AM 09-15-2014
I feel like this every once in a while. The problem is, presently I am making more at home than I ever did working (but you know how things can change at any point). There are days when I look around and think- these are the best days of my life. I think for so many of us, being home with our own kids is a priority, and we get to be present for so many wonderful things. On other days, I long for going to an appointment without having to inconvenience others- I usually put my needs below the super important dc parents I always find if there is a vacation day coming up, that helps tremendously. I am near year four of doing this, too, and you're not alone
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Cozy_Kids_Childcare 08:31 AM 09-15-2014
Originally Posted by Shell:
I feel like this every once in a while. The problem is, presently I am making more at home than I ever did working (but you know how things can change at any point). There are days when I look around and think- these are the best days of my life. I think for so many of us, being home with our own kids is a priority, and we get to be present for so many wonderful things. On other days, I long for going to an appointment without having to inconvenience others- I usually put my needs below the super important dc parents I always find if there is a vacation day coming up, that helps tremendously. I am near year four of doing this, too, and you're not alone
I think you hit the nail on the head. I hate to inconvenience my clients to the point that they have taken priority over everything else. I've even had a daycare girl here the morning of me having surgery and my mom coming to watch her and my kids while I had surgery and then my sister came over after I got home to help. Then when i wouldn't have my husband change his procedure date she was a huffy mess. It's a double edged sword this job.
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TwinKristi 09:47 AM 09-15-2014
I felt this way about a year ago. I had 1 family that was my first and she took advantage sometimes with my sick policy and at the time I didn't see it but looking back she just mowed me over. I was so sick of him being sick and getting others sick and getting ME sick and my kids having to go to the dr and miss school. It was effecting MY family so much! But at the time they were 50% of my income and I couldn't term. When I finally started posting on this forum and seeing how much she was taking advantage I used my backbone and she got mad and found a spot at her DD's preschool for him. At the same time I lost 2 more kids and was like I had 2 PT kids in Jan after winter break and it was pathetic. I got one to commit to FT at a discounted rate and advertised more. If it didn't work out I was ready to give up and find something else! I landed a new family in Feb, March, April, May and June! One has since left and one more signed on this month. I've been full or close to for months now and it's been great. I have more structure and the pay makes it worth 50hrs of work. I was working the same hours but with only 2 kids it broke down to less than $5/hr!!
Move furniture, advertise for new families, buy some new decor, toys, art supplies, etc. Fake it til you make it. When your kids are in school go back to subbing or teaching if you like that better.
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AmyKidsCo 06:55 PM 09-15-2014
I'm sorry you're feeling this way. I personally have never felt that way because I love being my own boss and I love working in my home. But I can easily see how someone could feel trapped - sometimes I get frustrated because I'm stuck at home 10 hours a day.

I hope you find a way to break out of it!
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frugalmama4 08:20 PM 09-15-2014
Good Evening and hello to all!

I have been away for sometime now...life has been way to busy in my world.

Cozy Kids : I totally know how you feel...I have been in the same boat since day one....not being able to be a 100% commit to your kids because your caring for someone else kids. I have been doing daycare for three years now...my kids are 13, 10, 7, 3, and I have my 18yr cousin living with me oh and the doggy. In the very beginning it was super hard to balance everything/one...but I'll say this year as been much better...

Changes I made in my business...
-change my hours 6:30am-5:30pm (no weekends)
-no state pay clients
-no siblings ( they expect a discount & take up multiple spots)
-very picky on who I take (mostly on the parents)...haven't had a unruly child I couldn't break.
-set goals

temporary fix: I converted the garage into the %daycare space...it was in my dining room...drove me crazy.

The best decision I made was hiring a full time assistant (she's a life saver!)...I know how in the world can I/ you afford a full time Assistant...we'll simple...I stop looking at the amount of money I was putting out and Focus on How much freedom it allows me ...best thing ever! I can clean/cook/ go have lunch with anyone of my children on any given day I want...I can due whats usually my weekend chores during the week & actually relax on my days off...

Goals- I see myself moving into a building and moving into the "true business own" position...no more having too get up at 6:00 to open the door...no more I'm sorry baby mommy can't come to your school play this time... Nope no more of being tied down with other people children. And the best part God willing I will be leaving s
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