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Old 10-12-2012, 10:55 AM
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Default Resenting Child? Potty Training

Here's the story. I have 2 children in my care that are not potty trained. One is a 2 year old girl, the other a 3 year old boy. Let me also mention that I pride myself in being "the potty training queen." i am not for traumatizing children, and pushing them into something that they are not capable of doing, humiliating them to make things faster, or anything like that. I have potty trained children in as little as 2 weeks, and some within a few months.

Since day one the 2 year olds mother was nagging me about beginning potty training, commenting on when she would bring pullups, and telling me how she wanted to potty train the child. She was also inspired by seeing a very advanced 2 year old in my care that was trained in about a week. I told her that when I saw signs of readiness in her child, and when her child was verbally able to communicate to me that she needed to go potty that I would come up with a potty training plan that would be best for the child, and would work well for daycare and at home. she stilled bothered me about it 2 or 3 times a week.

A few months pass since the child has started in my care, and I noticeed that her vocabulary was building, and that she showed more interest in the potty. I told her mother on Friday at pickup that I would begin taking the child to the potty more often, and encouraging her to pee. The mother seemed very excited. Monday at pick up, I told her mother that she did sit on the potty at each diaper change, but she had not actually peed or pooped. I explained to her that that was fine for the first day and that we would just take it slowly and go at the little girl's pace. At this point the mother said, "I don't think she's old enough. I'll just wait until later." I was a little thrown off by this, as she was the one who had been nagging me about it, and I told her that I do not like to start and stop when it comes to potty training. I like for it to be a commitment where everyone gives their best effort and support until the process is complete.

This actually upset me, and I just never brought up the subject again. I actually stopped sitting her on the seat, although she asks me frequently to go.

One day she was crying and I couldn't figure out why. After 10 minutes of trying to figure it out, I sat her on the potty and she pooped! She pooped in the potty! I told her mom and she was like..."good...". That is all she said. This little girl is more than ready to potty train. Another thing is that she is a child that has GROSS POOP! A lot of poop when she goes in her diaper! When I change her diaper, I think of her mom, and I wonder if the parents think about the provider. Sure you may be fine changing a diaper that looks like a lumberjack pooped in it, but what about the provider? She could have been very close to being trained at this point. On the other hand the 3 year old that I am currently training has parents who are completely on board. He may not be completely trained and he may be a little older than the little girl, but knowing that I have their support makes it so much easier!

Anywho.. I am venting! I also want to know if anyone else has ever felt like this, or what did you do?

Last edited by Blackcat31; 10-12-2012 at 11:02 AM. Reason: added spacing for easier reading
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Old 10-12-2012, 12:07 PM
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lil angels lil angels is offline
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I have a 3 yr old and a young 2 that I am traing. Right now and we started really hard with them both last week tues. both moms are very much ready they say. Well I am almost ready to try underwear with my 2 yr old and the 3 yr old came back to me after the weekend and we had to start over again. Mom says oh I just don't get it I don't think she understands. Oh she does but they are very busy and don't take her to the potty often. I think they just feel she should just start off by saying I have to go and be done. Well it doesn't work like that it takes some work and both of us have to do iti can't do it alone.

A lot of us get the same crap. I think parents feel its our job to do it alone and just send them home trained. Sorry it doesn't work like that.
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Old 10-12-2012, 12:16 PM
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And that's just it! That is exactly what they want! I am not Mary Poppins. I think she told me she didn't think she was ready because she felt attacked when I asked her how often she takes her at home, and her response was," Never really."
My own child was very difficult to potty trin. Very stubborn and afraid of the potty.
I knew I had to train her quick because I was working full time at the time, and had about a month window before I had to go back to work. Would you believe I spent a month inmy bedroom with a stinky potty chair, watching tv, and rooting her on, giving her stickers, rewards, high fiving. I couldn't really go anywhere, but when I did I was still on potty/reward alert. That's wht it takes as a parent. They just don't want to sacrifice the time.
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Old 10-12-2012, 12:17 PM
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littlemissmuffet littlemissmuffet is offline
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Honestly, I expect the parents to do the majority of the work at home and have them prepped to start the process here. I help the process along, and if the child is ready, it goes well and we can have a child trained within a week or two.

If the child is making little to no progress here, I stop the process and try at a later date.

Now, in a case like this where I know the child is ready and the parent is just being lazy about it, I will potty train the child for daycare. I find most kids already know that my house is nothing like being at their house so they adjust fine to being trained only here while mom/dad still keep them in dipes. But, you have to do what you feel is best for you. Good luck!
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