Unbathed Kids and Some Other Things. Help Please?

[CordiallyCranberry]

Hi there, I am not a licensed provider. I care for my cousins kids. I have a brother and sister pair. I've been caring for them for a few years and last June it turned full time.

Here are the issues I am having:

1. The girl has severe asthma. To the point where she constantly has a hacking smokers cough. Her father smokes in the bathroom at their house. It is a one floor home. The kids both stink of smoke constantly, but more importantly, this little girl more often than not has a really bad cough. I've even had to call her mother because her chest was collapsing.

2. The kids haven't been bathed in over a week. They both smell. Their nails are very long and have dirt caked under them. Sometimes they send them dressed but with the little girl, they leave me to do her hair. I don't mind doing that...I know how it is getting kids up in the morning. I have 2 of my own! So I have a bottle of detangler for her and her own comb here that I got for her here. Every single day it gets worse and worse. Today, I was gagging from the stale, dirty smell while doing her hair.

The little boy goes to preschool with my son 3 days a week. I was thinking of mentioning it to his teacher and seeing what she says to do?
Do you guys have any insight? I am not snobby by any means. My home is covered in toys and I always have kids here, so I understand a mess. But not medically being negligent to your child. And certainly not being dirty.
Do I offer to bathe them? Do I not offer and just do it and cut their nails?


These poor kids!

Also, on a completely selfish note, I don't like my kids playing with them when they are dirty. Ick!

[AuntTami]

Originally Posted by CordiallyCranberry

Hi there, I am not a licensed provider. I care for my cousins kids. I have a brother and sister pair. I've been caring for them for a few years and last June it turned full time.

Here are the issues I am having:

1. The girl has severe asthma. To the point where she constantly has a hacking smokers cough. Her father smokes in the bathroom at their house. It is a one floor home. The kids both stink of smoke constantly, but more importantly, this little girl more often than not has a really bad cough. I've even had to call her mother because her chest was collapsing.

2. The kids haven't been bathed in over a week. They both smell. Their nails are very long and have dirt caked under them. Sometimes they send them dressed but with the little girl, they leave me to do her hair. I don't mind doing that...I know how it is getting kids up in the morning. I have 2 of my own! So I have a bottle of detangler for her and her own comb here that I got for her here. Every single day it gets worse and worse. Today, I was gagging from the stale, dirty smell while doing her hair.

The little boy goes to preschool with my son 3 days a week. I was thinking of mentioning it to his teacher and seeing what she says to do?
Do you guys have any insight? I am not snobby by any means. My home is covered in toys and I always have kids here, so I understand a mess. But not medically being negligent to your child. And certainly not being dirty.
Do I offer to bathe them? Do I not offer and just do it and cut their nails?


These poor kids!

Also, on a completely selfish note, I don't like my kids playing with them when they are dirty. Ick!

If they are your cousins/cousins children, I would just bring it up directly to them. Just maybe gently say "I noticed Sally's finger nails are getting long and her hair was hard to brush this morning. Could you make sure your brushing it when it's washed" and then go from there.

If it was my family, I'd be blunt. But I'm mean lol.

[Thriftylady]

I would be blunt also. And if you really think it is neglect and it doesn't get fixed, then you may be left with no choice but to call CPS and make a report.

It WILL be hard and they WILL get embarrassed BUT it is the best thing for the CHILDREN. Their needs are more important.

[CordiallyCranberry]

Thanks. I will say something. I am notorious for being nice to people, so it isn't like me to be rude or blunt. But you are right. Thank you.

[Thriftylady]

Well being rude is different than being blunt.

[NightOwl]

I would just make the call. If you're worried about damaging your relationship with the parents, then lie. Make the call and at pick up time, tell them "oh my gosh, cps came here today. They said there was a report on your kids! What's going on??" Maybe that would take the heat off of you, but still get this addressed. Yes, it's dishonest, but if you're "too nice" or a very non confrontational person, this could work for you.