So my DCM that didn't thank me for my after hours childcare last night came today and said her and her husband have been looking for a winter coat but can't find one that would fit. Then said she didn't want him out under 32degrees. OK... I already told DCD that I'd keep him inside in a pack n play with toys since we usually go out before lunch and he's not napping at that time. "Oh, he's not going to like that!" No, probably not but I'm not going to keep all my other kids inside (unhappy) just to keep yours entertained! Either he comes ready to bundle up outside or he stays in by himself in a safe contained manner! My DC is in my walk-out basement and I can see the pack n play from our patio. (Being license exempt I can do this, as long as I am keeping the kids safe)
This is my family who also brings him every day, all day even though DCD works weekends most of the time and has days off during the week. Originally contracted to 3:30 but never picks up until 4:30 (we did change the contract, but still- I know he is at home and could pick up at 3:30). DCM brings at 7:00 on the days DCD is home even though I was told 7:00 was just when he was at work. I only have them and my 1 PT girl so I can't afford to term yet, but hoping to find another family and term sometime soon- I have it in my contract that I am here for families while they work or go to school, so working every day when he's home is just not for me. I'd rather work 5 days for someone who is working those 5 days! (I know that is not what a lot of people feel, but it makes me feel unappreciated... maybe consider giving me a day off just once?!)
OK, vent over!

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I have a 7/8 month old right now and they never bring a coat either. Actually at that age, you need a 1 pc snowsuit. That works best. I just wrap him in 2-3 blankets and have him in the stroller. 2-3 blankets is just as good as a snowsuit or coat. Babies love the fresh air, I would take him out.

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That's what I told them, but DCM said she doesn't want him out unless its 32 or higher. So I either leave him to cry in the pack n play or take him against their wishes . I don't like either but until I can afford to term those are my options!

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I'd take him out and wouldn't tell her. Seriously, if the temp isn't harmful to him, just do it. You have to do what works for you.

Shoot, here in Michigan, the child wouldn't go out all winter if we had to wait until 32 haha

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We're in NE, and there will be few days that reach 32 here as well!

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So the mom is not bringing a coat/snowsuit because she thinks that way she's controlling what you can do. What the heck is she afraid of? Like you're going to allow the baby to get frostbite. ya right. Tell her to get over it. Fresh air is good for babies. Here we are required to take them out daily unless the temp is extremely low.

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I wouldn't hide this info at all from them. I would just tell them no. "Sorry, but going outside is part of the program. We WILL be going outside. You can bring him appropriate clothing to do so, or take him back home with you today." Refuse care until you have what you need to do what you are going to do. I would never lie to a DCP.

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she can't tell you what to do in your own business!!

https://www.daycare.com/news/daycare_and_weather.html

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The Day Nurseries Act in Ontario requires two hours of outdoor time too, and I quote that to parents. 32* is still relatively warm, and kids generate heat while playing,

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Well, I guess it depends on how the conversation goes. Is mom asking every day when she picks up if her son went outside? I don't tell my parents when they pick up, oh we went outside today. If they ask, I tell them, but I don't go through every event of the day. So, guess it's not really lieing if she isn't asking ya know? I would take him out and if she asks then just say, yes, they all go out, it's not fair for the other kids to have to stay in.

Mama2Bella, what did she say when you told her that it's not fair to keep the other kids in? You did say that she said that the dcb wouldn't like being in the pack n play while the others were out, what was her other suggestion?

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I should clarify. I would not "lie" to a dcp, but like I wrote just above, when she picks up I just wouldn't go through every single thing I did during the day. If she point blank asks, then of course you have to tell her and explain your rules. When my dcp's pickup, I don't say oh we painted, we played with trains, we went outside, we ate etc. I don't go over what we did during the day including going outside unless they specifically wanted to know something. Hope that clears it up. I would not lie if asked though.

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Agree.


I would explain that per regulations,children must go out and she needs to make sure he has what he needs. It's not negotiable because that's what the regs stay.Tell her that if temps are below freezing, you will use YOUR best judgment. She's always afforded the option of staying home, but YOU have to go outside for at least a few mins at a time.

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I agree! She just said that if he was old enough to walk it would be different, but she doesn't want him just sitting outside since he's 9 months.

I did tell her we will be going outside- she knows I'm not going to stay inside just because he's not gong out. I want to tell her he needs to go out with us or be picked up, I just can't afford the term at this moment. I see her reasoning on one hand, but if she would bring the proper attire he could come out and stay warm. This isn't CA where people are not used to the cold I did look up my state's licensing regulations to see if there was anything that could back me up, but I couldn't find anything about temperatures or even going outside on a regular basis. So it's just up to me!

Today was 3 degrees and we stayed out for 30 minutes- the kids would've done longer but I decided it was time for hot chocolate (He slept in the pack n play- probably not helpful since he's not sleeping through the night at all and she complains about it, but hey- I can't control what he does in there while we're outside!)

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I was hoping our regulations stated something about outside requirements, but they don't here So I dan't have that to fall back on. It's not going to really affect me- I'm going out with everyone else regardless! One less child to bundle up I guess.

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Just thought I'd share our fun snow angels we made today! (If this works- have never uploaded pics here before!)

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I would have to say though that 3 degrees is too cold for a baby IMO. That's not even taking into account the wind chill I'm assuming. I don't typically take the kids out at all unless it's over 20. It doesn't get colder than that most times here.

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Cute pics! I am in the midwest & we were very cold today too (although not 3 degrees!) I think today's high is 25, it was 10 degrees earlier this a.m. I know at my kids' school they don't go out for recess if it is below 20. Maybe you can see what the schools in your area follow & adapt their plan. Either way the child (baby or not) needs to come in proper attire.

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I would use Lala's link above. That's what our state gives us, as well.

BUT, that one works well for me, because I have all the same age group. It differentiates infants and toddlers though. If you have a mixed age group, and are one person, I'm not sure how you can do anything but what you're doing.

As far as the napping, he's not up at night because he's napping too much. That's just silly! He needs 14-15 hours of sleep in a day. Usually, 2 naps at that age; a short one mid-morning and one longer one in the afternoon.

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I feel the same way that you do. If the parent is working or in school I am a provider for that, but I am not a babysitter. If your home, your child should be home with you. I do let my parents have time to themselves if they let me know ahead of time, but my parents don't abuse this. Most of my parents want to be with their kids when they are not working. I make it clear when I do interviews that I am here for them as a service for when they are working or going to school, not to keep the child here until I close because they are not working. I also expect no attitude when I take a personal day or paid vacations or holidays. I am a working parent just like them who values my time, my time with my family. I think your right on.

Parents don't have this take on it. they figure they are paying us good money to keep the kids till we close. Best way for a provider to hit burn out in no time. It does make us feel unappreciated and not valued.

Your daycare your rules. You need to do what is best for your group. I would have handed child back to parent and ask that they come back with appropriate clothing for child because you go outside everyday. I would not leave a child inside, licensed or not alone. Anything could happen in a split second. Child climbs out, fire, chokes etc.... anything. I would tell the parent I take all children out and I have to do what is best for the group as a whole. I need outside play clothes and whatever else the child needs for daily care.

Stick to your rules and you will fill up with clients, because you will be valued and known for consistency and truly looking out for the care of everyone, don't let a parent bully you and don't let them tell you how it is going to be, if they choose to go elsewhere they would have done that anyway most likely over anything.

A promise I made to myself when starting up was not to let money rule me in my business. Money is the reason I do this job, but no amount of money is worth me being unhappy everyday with a client, this is my life to live too and I want to go to work and have a like for my job and not the other way around. I am not saying that some days won't be hard, stressful etc..... but when everyday becomes miserable then something has to change.

Best-

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I wouldn't term, but I would tell the Mom bring a coat tomorrow for outside play or I am not going to be able to take in little kiddo. If she chooses to term let her. I wouldn't let her tell me when I could and could not go out. I would never leave a child inside and be outside. I don't care if it is the same level or not.

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3 degrees is cold. I would not bring my kids out in three degree weather. If I did it would not be for very long. I really think its personal common sense issue. A baby that is not mobile would get cold very fast in the face even bundled. I am full for going out, but I am just as for using your own judgment. Sometimes you don't have a choice and have to do what you have to do, but I would really make sure that every child was bundled if I had no choice to go out in 3 degree weather. 3 degrees verses 32 is a big difference. Do you have older kids or younger kids? My group is three and under so I would not go in 3 degree weather. Older kids would not stay out long in that weather. Maybe look into what the school system does and then go from there.

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The 3 degrees and 32 degrees are we talking C or F? Because that makes a BIG difference...

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Mom is trying to control your activities. it is not hard to find a coat, that is a lame excuse. I would go to the thrift store or kids resale shop and buy a snow suit for the child to use at daycare only and take them out anyway. $10 or $20 for a suitable clothing option is way cheaper than losing this family. If you cant lose this family, stop trying to get them to cooperate about the issue and just solve the issue on your own. I wouldnt say anything about what I am or am not doing unless they ask. I do think it is ridiculous that a child is going to and from daycare with no coat but that is their problem to handle so whatever. i also have no problem working for families that do have days off during the week provided they are paying for the daycare they are using. If she is working on the weekend, it makes sense to me that she would want some days during the week to sleep or run errands or whatever. I personally think it a little weird that she is not spending more time with her baby but this is sooooo common with daycare families that you may have to just deal with that for income's sake. its up to you though.

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I'd take him outside against her wishes.

It's YOUR program. It's YOUR house. And it's YOUR choice.

And that's exactly what I tell my parents.

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My phone said 3 degrees, but it did not feel that cold- I should check the news. It was sunny and no wind, a perfect day for the kiddos I do hate the cold, but it was nice to be outside and playing finally today! Thanks for the advice ladies

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She's in Nebraska, so it would be F I'm assuming.

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If you're interested I could send you a couple one piece suits free, just pay the shipping. I have to dig them out of the box in the garage but you could have them by next week! My friend gave me a few one pc suits for cold weather and they don't fit my DS anymore. They're super cute. Maybe that with some jammies underneath would keep him warm enough to play outside.
I personally think below 32* is too cold but I live in CA! 2* is waaaaay too cold for me. We wait until afternoon when it gets in the 40's to play outside. I don't think there's anything wrong with him being in the PNP in warm clothing. It's in many reg's that kids MUST spend at least 30 min outside if it's between 85-20* or something.

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I'm like you--I go with how it feels to be outside, not what the temp says.

Outside time is non-negotiable for me. If you don't want your kid outside, you don't want them here.

Considering where you are at this point with this parent, I'd start with working to redefine your expectations. I'd give mom some good info about the benefits of outdoor play and fresh air. Then I'd tell her that outside time is important to you and that it isn't fair to the child or the group as it is. I'd tell her you'd like to find some ways that you can both be comfortable with to get her child outside. Some ideas I did with babies:
--pad the ground to make a warmer place to play (blanket, blow-up sled w/blanket on top, wading pool)
--tote them to keep them off the ground (stroller, wagon, sled)
--wear them in a sling (this is what I did most often. They have your body warmth and you'll both stay toasty. I wore a big open-weave poncho over both of us.)
--bundle up in layers of wool and fleece and just play in the snow.

Good luck!! It's rotten feeling bossed around.

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amen!

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I love the chart. But according to the warmer temps charts, the kids here wouldn't get to go outside at all six months a year lol. Our temps are always above 90 with high humidity in the summer. Even air temps over 100.

But the cold weather chart is cool even though it doesn't take humidity into account which really affects what the temp feels like, even without wind. We have higher humidity year around.

Winter time temps frequently get to twenty and some nights even in the teens with high humidity.

Hmmm the more I think about it, I want to move somewhere warmer in the winter and cooler in the summer lol.

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Exactly. However, given that she agreed this morning, I would either text/phone mom and tell her the news, or go ahead with the PNP plan for today, and explain at pickup that this is not how it is going to work. Then tell mom how it IS going to work.

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Yep, as some awesome members regular point out... Where's that whisperer of ours... Parents can't give us permission to do the wrong thing.

Of course, there ARE personal preferences and religious preferences etc sometimes. I have no problems sharing their preferences. But in the end, it's my playground and my rules.

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DCGM picked up today and mentioned that she bought DCB a one piece snow suit, as her daughter had mentioned me asking about one. I'm curious to see if DCM brings it, admits to having it, or tells me they still don't have one tomorrow! At least he has one though!

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Did she bring it today?

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She did! It's set to be in the 30s so she said it was OK to take him outside!

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