Daycare.com Forum Force of Nature Disinfectant

Go Back   Daycare.com Forum > Main Category > Daycare Center and Family Home Forum

Daycare Center and Family Home Forum Daycare Center and Family Home owners, Directors, Operators and Assistants should post and ask questions here.

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 09-07-2017, 07:05 PM
Kplace's Avatar
Kplace Kplace is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Sep 2017
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1
Default Parent Cursed Out One Of My Teachers, Then Hung Up

Run large program. Got a rude parent and not sure what action to take. In the last 5 years we have put in a policy of suspension or immediate dismissal for rude, disruptive, or bullying behavior from parents. This is the first time it's happened since we instituted the policy.

Jonny did not have a permission slip to leave our program and state licensing requires it. One of the school teachers came down to our program ( we are in a school)stating dad sent her an email giving permission for Jonny to participate. The child missed maybe 5-10 minutes but was able to go. The dad called soon after and yells at her that our program and paper bureaucracy is ****. The teacher who did not allow his son to go to leadership program was ****. His son missed eating pizza at leadership bc our program was ****. (fyi his son did not miss eating pizza) and then hung up on her.

What to do? I personally will not tolerate anyone abusing our staff. No one should fear going to work because of a parent who might lose his top at the smallest thing.

Knowing this parent will cause holly hell with the school principal and board, how do I discipline the parent. They are a new family and it is only the second week of school. You know if this doesn't get nipped in the bud, he will continue to verbally abuse my staff.

I feel like a warning is to light but a 3 day suspension would be too much. He did not threaten her. If he did that, he would be done.

What do you all think?
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 09-07-2017, 07:10 PM
flying_babyb's Avatar
flying_babyb flying_babyb is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2017
Location: wisconsin
Posts: 905
Default

I say give them the warning and a days suspension. Remind them that if it happens again X will be the consequence. Also remind them that having the permission slip is important. What if the kid said he had to go to X and really didn't and took off? Dad would be even more mad. Sometimes it just takes that reminder to help
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 09-07-2017, 07:34 PM
hwichlaz's Avatar
hwichlaz hwichlaz is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: May 2013
Location: California
Posts: 2,044
Default

This was not rude or bullying, it was abusive. I'd expel.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 09-07-2017, 07:54 PM
kendallina's Avatar
kendallina kendallina is online now
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Ohio
Posts: 1,641
Default

I would disenroll. You said a policy was recently put in place, were consequences put in writing??
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 09-07-2017, 09:52 PM
Leigh's Avatar
Leigh Leigh is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Posts: 3,820
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kplace View Post
Run large program. Got a rude parent and not sure what action to take. In the last 5 years we have put in a policy of suspension or immediate dismissal for rude, disruptive, or bullying behavior from parents. This is the first time it's happened since we instituted the policy.

Jonny did not have a permission slip to leave our program and state licensing requires it. One of the school teachers came down to our program ( we are in a school)stating dad sent her an email giving permission for Jonny to participate. The child missed maybe 5-10 minutes but was able to go. The dad called soon after and yells at her that our program and paper bureaucracy is ****. The teacher who did not allow his son to go to leadership program was ****. His son missed eating pizza at leadership bc our program was ****. (fyi his son did not miss eating pizza) and then hung up on her.

What to do? I personally will not tolerate anyone abusing our staff. No one should fear going to work because of a parent who might lose his top at the smallest thing.

Knowing this parent will cause holly hell with the school principal and board, how do I discipline the parent. They are a new family and it is only the second week of school. You know if this doesn't get nipped in the bud, he will continue to verbally abuse my staff.

I feel like a warning is to light but a 3 day suspension would be too much. He did not threaten her. If he did that, he would be done.

What do you all think?
Follow your policy. That's what it is there for. I would not even CONSIDER suspension. I would terminate immediately. I would not allow them back for 1 more minute. You have this policy for a reason. Having a hothead parent who flips out on you or your employees is a liability. What if he had done this in front of the kids? It could happen next time. I think that you should contact this parent right away in the morning and let them know that you will NOT accept the child after school tomorrow or ever again because of his abusive behavior.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 09-08-2017, 02:06 AM
Josiegirl's Avatar
Josiegirl Josiegirl is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Right here
Posts: 10,498
Default

His response was extremely rude. And from what you said, your policy says suspension or dismissal. I'd give him one more chance, suspend him a day(or however long your policy states) and warn him if it happens again, it's dismissal from the program. Someone with that much anger doesn't sound like someone who's going to change anytime soon. And you cannot allow it to happen, especially with kids involved.
Good luck!!
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old 09-08-2017, 03:42 AM
daycarediva's Avatar
daycarediva daycarediva is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2012
Posts: 11,476
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by hwichlaz View Post
This was not rude or bullying, it was abusive. I'd expel.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Leigh View Post
Follow your policy. That's what it is there for. I would not even CONSIDER suspension. I would terminate immediately. I would not allow them back for 1 more minute. You have this policy for a reason. Having a hothead parent who flips out on you or your employees is a liability. What if he had done this in front of the kids? It could happen next time. I think that you should contact this parent right away in the morning and let them know that you will NOT accept the child after school tomorrow or ever again because of his abusive behavior.

They wouldn't step foot in my program again. DONE.
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old 09-08-2017, 05:47 AM
DaveA's Avatar
DaveA DaveA is online now
Daycare.com Member and Bladesmith
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Illinois
Posts: 4,109
Default

To me there are things that would lead me to terminate care rather then suspension/ warning.

1) A warning and even a short suspension probably wouldn't get the "Don't ever do that again" point across to the type of DCP who would treat their child's teacher like that. So it would probably happen again the first time DCP was mad enough to go off again.

2) Terminating care will give the message to your staff that you have their back. If a DCP cussed me out over their screw up and the director gave them a slap on the wrist and let them back in my room I'd start updating my resume ASAP.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:15 AM
Cat Herder's Avatar
Cat Herder Cat Herder is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 12,612
Default

"And now Johnny will miss out on this entire opportunity because Dad was an ***."

Unless he brings the class pizza, the teacher chocolates and sincerely apologizes.
__________________
- Unless otherwise stated, all my posts are personal opinion and worth what you paid for them.
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:43 AM
Blackcat31's Avatar
Blackcat31 Blackcat31 is offline
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 19,078
Default

Another vote for termination.

If you give a second chance it sends a horrible message...
(see 1, 2, 3 do you give warnings thread...lol!)

Verbal abuse is one of those things that sits in the NO TOLERANCE category.

If DCD was that concerned about making sure HIS child was allowed to participate HE should have done HIS part as a PARENT and not pass blame onto anyone else.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old 09-08-2017, 06:50 AM
laundrymom's Avatar
laundrymom laundrymom is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 4,222
Default

"Program participation is terminated immediately due to parental behavior. "
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old 09-08-2017, 07:27 AM
Pestle's Avatar
Pestle Pestle is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: May 2016
Location: Tennessee
Posts: 1,626
Default

I would terminate immediately. Otherwise, you've told this parent that he can call in and scream at you when he's made a mistake and doesn't like it. Make it clear the bridge is burned.

Your employees need to know you've got their backs. When I was in customer service, my boss sometimes stood between me and an abusive customer. Because he valued his employees more than just one customer, and because he enforced the company culture of respect, he was surrounded with loyal and hard-working employees. That's the culture you have the opportunity to build here. . . or to destroy.

Your enrolled parents need to know you're providing an environment that's a safe space for everyone. They'll lose trust in you if this gets around.

The best thing you can do for this child is demonstrate that his dad's behavior will not get results. Additionally, if this kind of verbal abuse is going on at home, affirming its unacceptability will help the child name it for what it is and avoid the dissonance that kids experience when the community gives their abusers a pass.
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old 09-08-2017, 07:37 AM
daycare's Avatar
daycare daycare is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Moderator
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Mars
Posts: 16,021
Default

I am another vote for term.

what kind of message does this send to your employee if you don't follow the rules you set? you made rules and EVERYONE follows them.

to me that says yes there are rules and even if you break them, I am not going to enforce them.

I would stand my ground and follow through with your rules.
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old 09-08-2017, 09:36 AM
Josiegirl's Avatar
Josiegirl Josiegirl is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2013
Location: Right here
Posts: 10,498
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by Pestle View Post
I would terminate immediately. Otherwise, you've told this parent that he can call in and scream at you when he's made a mistake and doesn't like it. Make it clear the bridge is burned.

Your employees need to know you've got their backs. When I was in customer service, my boss sometimes stood between me and an abusive customer. Because he valued his employees more than just one customer, and because he enforced the company culture of respect, he was surrounded with loyal and hard-working employees. That's the culture you have the opportunity to build here. . . or to destroy.

Your enrolled parents need to know you're providing an environment that's a safe space for everyone. They'll lose trust in you if this gets around.

The best thing you can do for this child is demonstrate that his dad's behavior will not get results. Additionally, if this kind of verbal abuse is going on at home, affirming its unacceptability will help the child name it for what it is and avoid the dissonance that kids experience when the community gives their abusers a pass.
Seeing the whole situation put this way, I'm changing my mind. Everything Pestle said makes perfect sense. But don't forget telling all the right agencies what went on in case dcd is the vengeful sort.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old 09-08-2017, 11:28 AM
Mom2Two's Avatar
Mom2Two Mom2Two is offline
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jan 2015
Location: U. S. A.
Posts: 1,851
Default Aggressive

Yelling, accusing, swearing...this is aggressive and intimidating behavior. It is verbal abuse. It is threatening behavior.

No teacher should have to put up with being treated this way. If dcd has an issue, he needs to learn to communicate politely, follow policy, take it up with the chain of command or whatever, not just yell at people.
Reply With Quote
  #16  
Old 09-08-2017, 11:33 AM
Ariana's Avatar
Ariana Ariana is offline
Advanced Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Jun 2011
Posts: 8,768
Default

My thoughts exactly!! Terminate. If he has to come to the premises to pick anything up consider a police presence.
Reply With Quote
  #17  
Old 09-08-2017, 12:34 PM
Baby Beluga's Avatar
Baby Beluga Baby Beluga is online now
Daycare.com Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2014
Location: USA
Posts: 3,840
Default

Another vote for term. PP's are right, if you don't term you are sending the message to DCP that is sort of behavior is okay and sending a message to your employee that you do not support them in the workplace. I too would be updating my resume.

I am interested to find out an update.
Reply With Quote
  #18  
Old 09-13-2017, 06:29 AM
Unregistered
Guest
 
Posts: n/a
Default

Another vote for termination. If a dcp called me (home provider) and spoke to me that way, boom, gone.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Tags
abusive parents, parents - disrespect, rude parents, stress, teachable moment, terminate - disrespect

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Do Your Daycare Kids Act Out at Pickup? jenh171 Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 72 12-13-2018 04:57 PM
Child's Behavior At Pick Up momatheart Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 11 07-29-2017 01:39 PM
Temination Due To Transportation W/Out Permission kelliott Parents and Guardians Forum 183 04-26-2013 09:34 AM
Ex Daycare Parent Just Showing Up At Your Door E Daycare Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 7 02-08-2013 07:51 PM
My Contract...What Do You Think? JeepGirl6 Daycare Center and Family Home Forum 14 01-21-2011 06:17 PM


All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:17 PM.



Daycare.com         Find A Daycare         List Your Daycare         Toys & Products                 About Us

Daycare.com
Please read our Disclaimer before continuing.

Topics pertain mainly to the following States:

Alabama Alaska Arizona Arkansas California Colorado Connecticut Delaware District of Columbia Florida Georgia Hawaii Idaho Illinois Indiana Iowa Kansas Kentucky Louisiana Maine Maryland Massachusetts Michigan Minnesota Mississippi Missouri Montana Nebraska Nevada New Hampshire New Jersey New Mexico New York North Carolina North Dakota Ohio Oklahoma Oregon Pennsylvania Rhode Island South Carolina South Dakota Tennessee Texas Utah Vermont Virginia Washington West Virginia Wisconsin Wyoming