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  #1  
Old 01-17-2020, 04:44 AM
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Default How Do I Respond

This is a piggy back post to my one yesterday about mom wanting to call the shots and limit travel, etc.

I am actively looking for their replacement- which I need before terming and I need to be polite and professional in the meantime.

How do I respond to her text saying baby was up early today and “if he could make it to 9:30 that would be great”. For him it is not going to happen. It would make for a miserable morning for us all. I really just need her to stop micromanaging and for some reason that little piece alone is putting a lot of stress on me (though I’m not sure why?)
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Old 01-17-2020, 05:00 AM
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"I will follow his sleep cues."

"I'm sure he will let me know when he is ready to rest."

"I don't go by the clock or set schedules. I go by the needs of the child."

"When he gets cranky I can let you know. You can come keep him up against his will until 9:30, while I work with the other children."
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Old 01-17-2020, 05:01 AM
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Go with your normal schedule.This is group care and you cannot cater to each individual child.I would reply with if "I WILL TRY".Then do what you need to do. Short and sweet reply then do your best for you and the other children.Sometimes it just takes a little time for parents to understand group care.I would always say we will see.
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Old 01-17-2020, 05:13 AM
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"If you could get him to sleep in more that would be great!"
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Old 01-17-2020, 05:21 AM
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I would just respond "Thanks!" And then stop replying through out the day.

I had a parent send a daily schedule and instructions in DCBs lunch box and she would call every day at noon to talk about how he was doing. I event started to ignored the little lists because it started stressing me out and just followed my own schedule and his cues. I eventually just stopped answering her calls and would reply with a quick text to say "busy day, is there an emergency?" If she said no, i ignored all additonal texts she sent until nap time and then would reply with just a quick text, "having a great day, see you at 5!".

She eventually stopped all together when she saw she wasn't getting any additional information or attention from me. They ended up being able to get on track and i had him for a bunch of years, they ended up being one if my better families!

All this to say, yes definitely keep looking for a replacement but it is not to late to correct the course your on and take back control. Who knows, it may even work out keepung them once you feel better about the situation!

I also saw your other post, and again it's ok to just redirect and take control. "Ok mom, i totally get you're not comfortable, Johnny will need to have alternate care on the days we do field trips. If you ever change your mind let me know. I can give you the paperwork, we'd love to have him join!"
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Old 01-17-2020, 05:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Unregistered View Post
This is a piggy back post to my one yesterday about mom wanting to call the shots and limit travel, etc.

I am actively looking for their replacement- which I need before terming and I need to be polite and professional in the meantime.

How do I respond to her text saying baby was up early today and “if he could make it to 9:30 that would be great”. For him it is not going to happen. It would make for a miserable morning for us all. I really just need her to stop micromanaging and for some reason that little piece alone is putting a lot of stress on me (though I’m not sure why?)
I would not even dignify that with a response. If she asks about it, tell her you were busy WORKING and can't always get your phone.
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Old 01-17-2020, 05:51 AM
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Answer with “will do!” Then proceed to do what is needed at daycare. Parents like this are ridiculous so I just smile and nod and then do what I need to do! Keeps conflict down when they think I am doing what they want me to do and I don’t feel resentment because I am doing what I need to do! I have a family that tells me their kid no longer naps in the morning at home and could I not nap her. Sorry but your kid is a mess if she doesn’t nap so I continue to nap her in the morning. I meet the kids needs, not the parents. Parents just get in the way of good, responsive care.
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Old 01-17-2020, 07:05 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Indoorvoice View Post
I would not even dignify that with a response.
This is what I would do.

I would just let her talk but not reply.
If she wants to give instructions on how to care for her child in your care, I would make it clear that you know what you are doing and that while input from parents is appreciated, it's rarely helpful or useful as care IN a group program is NOTHING like care at home.

I would continue to repeat something to that effect every time she brings anything up that she thinks you should do.

Just continue to tell her you got this.
She can do her time, you do yours.
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  #9  
Old 01-17-2020, 08:32 AM
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I would probably email her a copy of the class schedule and tell her that is how my program operates. Clearly she does not understand group care is not nanny care.

I believe this relationship can be salvaged with that simple education. Remember this problem won't even exist in 12 months, infant schedules are really over in the blink of an eye.
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Old 01-18-2020, 02:31 AM
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I just replied to your other post but after reading all these posters' replies, I think if you stand up to this dcm and use some of these tactics above, then maybe it'll be a learning curve for her AND for you for taking back your business. If she's new at this, she's learning what to do or not do. And of course, being a new parent(I assume?) she's protective of her nonverbal little one. I would be too. BUT she also needs to learn group care is very different than 1 on 1 care. And if you don't help her learn that, then she gets passed off onto someone else. Try standing up tactfully to her and see what happens; who knows, it could be a great thing! Worst that'll happen is she'll leave and your environment will be less stressed out.
I think having an honest discussion with her may be what's needed at the moment. Don't confuse 'polite and professional' with letting dcm have the run of your business. Good luck and stay strong!
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  #11  
Old 01-20-2020, 08:03 PM
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Due to our licensing regulations we are not allowed to interfere with infant sleep time, keep them awake till certain time, force them to sleep if not sleepy, etc. As simple as that, and it's actually true.
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