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Unregistered 12:42 PM 11-14-2013
I have a 14 month old dcg that I need help with. I provide breakfast, lunch and 2 snacks. When I go into the kitchen to prepare food she will crawl in after me and sit behind me and scream until I am finished and start feeding her. Then if I have to get up to get another child more food she will scream until I start again. She eats more than I do but weighs less than a 6 month old. Any advice?

Also mom told me she does not want me to give her snacks before a meal.
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KidGrind 12:58 PM 11-14-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have a 14 month old dcg that I need help with. I provide breakfast, lunch and 2 snacks. When I go into the kitchen to prepare food she will crawl in after me and sit behind me and scream until I am finished and start feeding her. Then if I have to get up to get another child more food she will scream until I start again. She eats more than I do but weighs less than a 6 month old. Any advice?

Also mom told me she does not want me to give her snacks before a meal.

I have one of those.

I can’t offer advice because well I am still in the thick of it. As far as the mom if snacks are part of your program, why would you deny a child a snack? I would simply tell her, “I understand your request. I am not comfortable with denying any child meals or snacks at the scheduled times."
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Willow 01:08 PM 11-14-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have a 14 month old dcg that I need help with. I provide breakfast, lunch and 2 snacks. When I go into the kitchen to prepare food she will crawl in after me and sit behind me and scream until I am finished and start feeding her. Then if I have to get up to get another child more food she will scream until I start again. She eats more than I do but weighs less than a 6 month old. Any advice?

Also mom told me she does not want me to give her snacks before a meal.
I have an open floor plan. Kitchen, dining and livingroom are all in one space unseparated except for by flooring. Call me crazy, but I train all toddlers not to leave the livingroom when I'm in the kitchen. The livingroom is their designated play space, so if they leave the carpet I simply pick them back up and redirect them onto a toy back in the livingroom. Repeat, repeat, repeat. Actually doesnt take them long to figure out at all and keeps them at a safe distance from stove, oven, knives I'm cutting with, hot and any dropped food. It's actually kind of interesting to watch the light bulb come on.....most will hit a point where they sit right on the edge and literally TOE the line as they sort out where exactly the sticking point for me is lol

I ignore screamers under all circumstances.

Unless I'm making a special meal that the older kids can help with they go back into the playroom. Allows me to keep an ear on them, an eye on the littles and my brain focused at the tasks at hand so I don't burn the grub......with a fraction of the chaos
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Margarete 01:09 PM 11-14-2013
A 14 month old needs snacks! Being denied snacks at home may be why she is so frantic about food.
Considering that she weighs less most 6 months old, and she's 14 months I would think that she is going through a growth spurt, and I wouldn't want to limit food. There were definitely times when my daughter ate more then I did, and is currently hardly eating at all... Kids will cycle, but denying food will mess with their natural ability to eat the amount their body needs.
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Willow 01:35 PM 11-14-2013
She's not being denied snacks guys, mom is asking to not let her snack right before a meal.

Many parents will immediately put kiddo up and dump a bunch of whatever on their tray to keep them occupied while they prep a meal.....is at least how I understood that.
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itlw8 01:41 PM 11-14-2013
wait until you start again ??? so she is not on table food nor does she feed herself at 14 months ???? give her part of her lunch to feed herself while you fix lunch... green beans, cheese, cheerios, and encourage her to feed herself
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Margarete 01:43 PM 11-14-2013
Originally Posted by Willow:
She's not being denied snacks guys, mom is asking to not let her snack right before a meal.

Many parents will immediately put kiddo up and dump a bunch of whatever on their tray to keep them occupied while they prep a meal.....is at least how I understood that.
That i understand. You mention that she is 14 months old and weighs less then a 6 month old, but still eats a lot. How long have you had her? I'm wondering if she has something medical going on, if this is been typical for an extended period of time... otherwise I would think it's just a cycle and will subside after she's done with her growth spurt, and continuing to know that she WILL get a chance soon to eat her fill.
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Unregistered 02:50 PM 11-14-2013
Op here-

Mom doesn't want me to give her snacks while I prepare food to keep her happy. Then she will fill up on snacks and not eat the real food. I have had her since she was 4 months old. She has always been a HUGE eater!! She wont refuse food. I have to stop feeding her otherwise she would continue to eat. She wasn't a premie but has always been extremely small and on the slower end for milestones.

I have to spoon feed her because she will put it all in her mouth and immediately try to swallow without chewing. I spoon feed her 95% of the time so she doesn't choke.
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KidGrind 03:27 PM 11-14-2013
Originally Posted by Willow:
She's not being denied snacks guys, mom is asking to not let her snack right before a meal.

Many parents will immediately put kiddo up and dump a bunch of whatever on their tray to keep them occupied while they prep a meal.....is at least how I understood that.
Thanks for correcting my interpretation.

I’d just ignore her crying until meal prep was done.
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littlemissmuffet 09:13 AM 11-15-2013
Originally Posted by Willow:
I have an open floor plan. Kitchen, dining and livingroom are all in one space unseparated except for by flooring. Call me crazy, but I train all toddlers not to leave the livingroom when I'm in the kitchen. The livingroom is their designated play space, so if they leave the carpet I simply pick them back up and redirect them onto a toy back in the livingroom. Repeat, repeat, repeat. Actually doesnt take them long to figure out at all and keeps them at a safe distance from stove, oven, knives I'm cutting with, hot and any dropped food. It's actually kind of interesting to watch the light bulb come on.....most will hit a point where they sit right on the edge and literally TOE the line as they sort out where exactly the sticking point for me is lol

I ignore screamers under all circumstances.

Unless I'm making a special meal that the older kids can help with they go back into the playroom. Allows me to keep an ear on them, an eye on the littles and my brain focused at the tasks at hand so I don't burn the grub......with a fraction of the chaos


Exactly how I handle things here. My kids know within a few days of starting that they stay in the playroom while I'm prepping meals.
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Unregistered 09:17 AM 11-15-2013
I ignore her when she screams. Today I put her in the exersaucer in the living room 5 minutes before I started lunch. She was playing and cheerful. Then as soon as I went into the kitchen she scram the whole time.
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melilley 10:37 AM 11-15-2013
I have a 15 mo old who does the same and it drives me nuts! He too can eat a ton and is so little. I also prepare the meal/snack and let him cry. Sometimes I move him to the family room because he gets so loud, but he usually comes back and is at my feet pulling at my legs and screaming again. Sometimes I ignore it and other times I keep moving him back to the family room.

Mom thinks he does it because he is anxious to eat because they think he may have reflux and knows it will hurt when he eats (that's a whole different story), but then asked if I could give him something while I make the food.? I don't do that because then the other kids want food too and there is no reason that he can't wait until they all eat. Plus, my food times with the exception of pm snack, are only 2 1/2 hours apart if that.
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countrymom 11:24 AM 11-15-2013
I have a feeling that she is fed every time she screams. Also, stop feeding her and let her feed herself. Start off by giving her one thing at a time, a pain, but she needs to feed herself.
I have a dcg who was fed by herself because the parents didn't like her getting dirty. Within a month she figured out how to eat by herself and sits with the older kids with no problem at all and shes a very clean eater.
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Willow 11:38 AM 11-15-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I ignore her when she screams. Today I put her in the exersaucer in the living room 5 minutes before I started lunch. She was playing and cheerful. Then as soon as I went into the kitchen she scram the whole time.
She's a child that has learned she needs to be rescued once you move out of her comfort "radius." Which is actually an awesome thing, it makes her problem super easy to work

If five feet it her radius, start working on expanding it by inching away doing busy work at 5'1"....then 5'2"....then back to 4'8"....then back out to 5'2" etc. No joke, spreading books all over is a great way to desensitize without directly feeding into her as she processes her emotions of whats going on. Just play with her line grabbing a book closer to her, and then further out, then closer, then even further out until she sees you can move in and out of it and nothing bad is going to happen to her.

If she responds well hand her one or sit down and read a page. Go back to picking up 10 books playing with that line and if she does well reward her again.

Not something you can use right now this very minute but it does give you something to work with. The fantastic side effect of using books as your tool, she will naturally start to calm whenever you bring them out. No exaggeration, her brain chemisty will automatically start to change if she sees you spread them on the floor around you so you can definitely use that positive association other places she gets riled.
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My3cents 11:54 AM 11-15-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Op here-

Mom doesn't want me to give her snacks while I prepare food to keep her happy. Then she will fill up on snacks and not eat the real food. I have had her since she was 4 months old. She has always been a HUGE eater!! She wont refuse food. I have to stop feeding her otherwise she would continue to eat. She wasn't a premie but has always been extremely small and on the slower end for milestones.

I have to spoon feed her because she will put it all in her mouth and immediately try to swallow without chewing. I spoon feed her 95% of the time so she doesn't choke.
I would put her in a high chair so she can watch you, and I would give her part of her lunch cut up small, a few cheerios scattered on her tray so she has to reach for them and I would talk with her while you prep. I would not give into her screaming even if you had to put up with it for a few days so she knows your not going to react to it. Smile at her, maybe do a quiet shhh with a smile, then just carry on. I wouldn't let her fill up before a meal but if you have to keep peace by starting her a bit ahead of the group with healthy options you need to do what you need to do. Group care, not one on one and do what works for you. When a parent makes a request like that. I reply with that is a good suggestion maybe I will try that. I don't offer out that I am going to do it, because I need to do what works best for me. No way would I be spoon feeding, cut her food small and give small portions. Give her a little spork to hold. When I have babies and I need to prep I give them an easy to clean toy. She is older so a spook-fork would work well.

Best-
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