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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>EBD kids
1vs7omg 08:45 PM 11-22-2011
Need some advice: got my licensed about 11 days ago, put ads up, had an interview today with a women with 2 boys (new to the lingo) who have ebd (emotional behavior disorder).
I thought out every scario with starting a daycare, this never entered my mind. I'm meeting the kids tomorrow to see how they are and I told her there would be a trial period because I'm not too sure. These would be my first kids. I also have custody of my 3yr old grandson.
I have a set rate for all ages, but I'm wondering if I should raise the rate for her and what do you think it should be? Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks
I thought out every scario with starting a daycare, this never entered my mind. I'm meeting the kids tomorrow to see how they are and I told her there would be a trial period because I'm not too sure. These would be my first kids. I also have custody of my 3yr old grandson.
I have a set rate for all ages, but I'm wondering if I should raise the rate for her and what do you think it should be? Any suggestions would be appreciated. Thanks
Lucy 09:31 PM 11-22-2011
Unless you really have a calling to work with challenging kids, this sounds to me like a lot of hard work and frustration. IF you take them (and God help you if you do) YES - raise the rate for them. And consider having a helper.
If it were me, I would run, not walk, from this scenario. But that's just me.
If it were me, I would run, not walk, from this scenario. But that's just me.
Michelle 06:35 AM 11-23-2011
Do some research on this. Also consider future kids. If you take these kids and they are having a melt down...
#1 other parents will see it and fear for their kids,
#2 your house could be damaged,
#3 you might be in a position to have to restrain the kids to protect them and others and then get blamed for "whatever" and
#4 it's easier to not take a special needs child to begin with than to term one after you have problems and deal with very mad parents, laws, and the quilt that goes along with it all... I used to be the " I can help,save,take, any child kind of provider" now I have lived and learned and you have to think of your group as a whole and do what's best for all of them.
#1 other parents will see it and fear for their kids,
#2 your house could be damaged,
#3 you might be in a position to have to restrain the kids to protect them and others and then get blamed for "whatever" and
#4 it's easier to not take a special needs child to begin with than to term one after you have problems and deal with very mad parents, laws, and the quilt that goes along with it all... I used to be the " I can help,save,take, any child kind of provider" now I have lived and learned and you have to think of your group as a whole and do what's best for all of them.
1vs7omg 06:46 AM 11-23-2011
Thank you. That's what I believe I am. I have a big heart and want to help every parent, especially low income and and single parents. That's one area I am going to have trouble in.
My policy states that she has to pay the day of and she wants me to watch them today and Friday. She has 2 kids, 6 and 8yr. so she needs to come up with $ first. She told me she gets paid on Friday but I did stand my ground and said I needed up front so we will see.
My policy states that she has to pay the day of and she wants me to watch them today and Friday. She has 2 kids, 6 and 8yr. so she needs to come up with $ first. She told me she gets paid on Friday but I did stand my ground and said I needed up front so we will see.
Unregistered 06:51 AM 11-23-2011
If you do decide to take them, I would make sure I read up on EBD. I would also ask mom to specifically tell you what some of the challenges are for caring for them. Have they been in care before? Were they termed or did they leave on their own? I would even go so far as to maybe follow up and talk with previous provider if possible.
I would also make sure I had a clear set of expectations for mom AND the boys as far as what will and won't be tolerated in regards to behavior while at daycare. How does mom discipline and what are her methods/routines at home with them.
If you ask the right questions and you really feel like you and mom can successfuly work TOGETHER, caring for the boys shouldn't be too difficult.
I am wondering though why you feel it is necessary to raise your rates after finding out the boys have EBD? Will you need to provide an assistant? or special equipment? Just curious.
I would also make sure I had a clear set of expectations for mom AND the boys as far as what will and won't be tolerated in regards to behavior while at daycare. How does mom discipline and what are her methods/routines at home with them.
If you ask the right questions and you really feel like you and mom can successfuly work TOGETHER, caring for the boys shouldn't be too difficult.
I am wondering though why you feel it is necessary to raise your rates after finding out the boys have EBD? Will you need to provide an assistant? or special equipment? Just curious.
KEG123 08:42 AM 11-23-2011
I'd for sure call the previous providers too!
SimpleMom 09:06 AM 11-23-2011
Oh boy. I wish you the best on that 
I also have a heart for that, but found out it's very tough to accomplish great overall care when I include any ebd or max 1 at a time (even that's tough). Interviews always look good. Parents have always tempered with the true nature of the issue--even when the say "yep, we have issues with XYZ. Most of the time i found they were hiding something. Can't blame them for doing that when they really need the help.
All but one time I referred them to one
ne care. The other littles picked up on the behavior and it took almost a year to fade out of that affect
I also have a heart for that, but found out it's very tough to accomplish great overall care when I include any ebd or max 1 at a time (even that's tough). Interviews always look good. Parents have always tempered with the true nature of the issue--even when the say "yep, we have issues with XYZ. Most of the time i found they were hiding something. Can't blame them for doing that when they really need the help. All but one time I referred them to one
ne care. The other littles picked up on the behavior and it took almost a year to fade out of that affect
cheerfuldom 11:23 AM 11-23-2011
Do you even know what EBD is? Are you trained to handle special needs children? I just really think that you need to be careful about bending any rules for any reason. I understand you want to help people but this is also a very serious job where you have to consider all the risks associated with taking on a special needs child.
Childminder 12:21 PM 11-23-2011
I've had 2 EBD children that were diagnosed and a couple that probably did have it. My advice to you is to RUN THE OTHER WAY! You will be a major basket case and it will put major stress on your family unless you can devote every moment to them that they are with you. Forget trying to care for any one else or your home.
Kaddidle Care 01:07 PM 11-23-2011
Is this something new? I've never heard of it.
cheerfuldom 01:09 PM 11-23-2011
Can anybody enlighten us as to what exactly EBD is? I googled it and it seems like a very "catch all" type of diagnosis. I am no expert but it seems like there is a wide variety of issues that a provider could encounter.....
Kaddidle Care 02:25 PM 11-23-2011
I found this: http://www.gallaudet.edu/clerc_cente...disorders.html
A lot of symptoms are very ADD like but include depression. Almost sounds like BiPolar.
Are the children deaf, hard of hearing and/or medicated?
How old are the children?
If they are much older than the 3 year old I would be wary.
A lot of symptoms are very ADD like but include depression. Almost sounds like BiPolar.
Are the children deaf, hard of hearing and/or medicated?
How old are the children?
If they are much older than the 3 year old I would be wary.
1vs7omg 10:35 AM 11-25-2011
Thank you for all your opinions. I have been stressing out just thinking about it and if I'm stressing out now, what's it going to be like when they are here.
The mother was supposed to come Wednesday with her boys at 9am. She never came, called me at 9:40 to tell me something came up and can she bring them over before she goes to work. Apparently, she thought no matter how they were, I was going to watch them. I told her I had to cancel an engagement so I could meet her kids at 9, but since you didn't show up, I rescheduled and I wasn't going to cancel a 2nd time. She was upset, told me she couldn't miss another day and was going to think about it.
So, after your thoughts and my own, I'm going to tell her if she calls again, I don't think it will work because like many of you said, I need to think about my grandson and any other kids I will be watching.
The mother was supposed to come Wednesday with her boys at 9am. She never came, called me at 9:40 to tell me something came up and can she bring them over before she goes to work. Apparently, she thought no matter how they were, I was going to watch them. I told her I had to cancel an engagement so I could meet her kids at 9, but since you didn't show up, I rescheduled and I wasn't going to cancel a 2nd time. She was upset, told me she couldn't miss another day and was going to think about it.
So, after your thoughts and my own, I'm going to tell her if she calls again, I don't think it will work because like many of you said, I need to think about my grandson and any other kids I will be watching.
nannyde 11:37 AM 11-25-2011
Originally Posted by 1vs7omg:
Thank you for all your opinions. I have been stressing out just thinking about it and if I'm stressing out now, what's it going to be like when they are here.
The mother was supposed to come Wednesday with her boys at 9am. She never came, called me at 9:40 to tell me something came up and can she bring them over before she goes to work. Apparently, she thought no matter how they were, I was going to watch them. I told her I had to cancel an engagement so I could meet her kids at 9, but since you didn't show up, I rescheduled and I wasn't going to cancel a 2nd time. She was upset, told me she couldn't miss another day and was going to think about it.
So, after your thoughts and my own, I'm going to tell her if she calls again, I don't think it will work because like many of you said, I need to think about my grandson and any other kids I will be watching.
Don't stress out over it. A week from now they will just a blip on your past daycare life. Thank you for all your opinions. I have been stressing out just thinking about it and if I'm stressing out now, what's it going to be like when they are here.
The mother was supposed to come Wednesday with her boys at 9am. She never came, called me at 9:40 to tell me something came up and can she bring them over before she goes to work. Apparently, she thought no matter how they were, I was going to watch them. I told her I had to cancel an engagement so I could meet her kids at 9, but since you didn't show up, I rescheduled and I wasn't going to cancel a 2nd time. She was upset, told me she couldn't miss another day and was going to think about it.
So, after your thoughts and my own, I'm going to tell her if she calls again, I don't think it will work because like many of you said, I need to think about my grandson and any other kids I will be watching.
You are going to run into prospective clients that have behavior issues and are disrespectful. You have to understand that badly behaving parents are just as common as badly behaving children. Children with emotional or mental disorders are as common as parents with emotional and mental health issues.
You have just encountered a parent that is disrespectful and ungrateful. She didn't bother calling you BEFORE the interview time and cancel or reschedule. She took 40 minutes of your time plus the pre-interview time and then had the nerve to be upset because you wouldn't do as she wished and give her another chance.
That's terribly disrespectful and entitled. It's better that she move on to another provider who allows disrespect and entitlement. She's lucky to even GET an interview when she is looking for care for TWO children with special needs. She obviously doesn't get it or is comfortable knowing that there are so many providers out there who are desperate enough to allow her to act up.
Just shake it off and move on.
