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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Help With Vegan Child
TGT09 10:36 AM 11-18-2010
I have a 3yo vegan dcg. Her family has only been vegan since May of this year so I use to feed her my normal food but now she gets food sent from home.

This year, I only have two 3yo's. My vegan dcg and a dcb whom I make lunch for.

For the past several weeks, vegan girl will not eat. She has consistently complained about not being hungry (after saying she was) after seeing her food (no offense but it is pretty gross looking). I NEVER say anything to her about how it looks, tastes, etc. If she says "I don't like it", I always say it looks good or I bet it's yummy.

Today, I set her plate down in front of her and dcb whom is having a pb&j sandwich. She immediately without touching any of it, says she's not hungry....up until the past few weeks, all summer and all school year last year I have never had a problem with her eating and she's always scarfed down food as a matter of fact.

I have approached mom (whom is one of my favorite and most helpful parents) but she almost gets defensive and I'm not sure why. I say "Sally didn't eat her lunch today" or "Sally only had a little bit of lunch today". I have even reassured her that I'm not talking "bad" about her food. Her answer has been consistently "we wouldn't send anything we knew she wouldn't eat." End of story.

I'm starting to get frustrated because that's not what I'm trying to say. I'm just simply pointing out the fact that she's not eating for me. I don't like when kids don't eat and have problems letting children up before they've finished (yes, my own problem and I'm working on it). I don't ever want kids to go hungry.

I just don't know what to do anymore or how I can verbalize to mom that she's not eating for me without her taking it the wrong way.

Please help or give me suggestions on how to handle dcg without involving dcm.

Also, I know deep down that it's mostly because she sees what dcb is eating and would rather have that. She has even asked a few times if she could have something else....which I have to tell her no. I'm still allowed to give her fresh fruit and veggies. I even hunt out non-dairy things in the store that she can eat for snack. I supply the soymilk and everything. I never give her anything else at lunch time because I'm afraid of sending the wrong message that they can "choose" what they want and don't have to eat what they don't because they can have something else.

I love this dcg and her family so terminating solves nothing here.
laundrymom 10:47 AM 11-18-2010
I would get her to the table and started eating while I was preparing his food, then serve him the veg and fruit portion of his food, then after she had eaten some give him his sandwiches or whatever is off her ok to eat list. I have 2 vegetarians, not vegams, but they eat totally seperate food fromthe other kids, we sit at the table,... eat, if they say anything I just say Im sorry you have to eat something,... Or,.. tell your mom what you dont like in this lunch, or something like that. I would tell mom that you know she eats it for her,.. but she isnt wanting it with you because the other kids have different things,.. ask her how she wants you to handle it.
TGT09 10:57 AM 11-18-2010
Yeah, I like all that. I will try it on Monday. She's the only one here tomorrow and on those days I don't normally have problems with her eating. Thanks!
Live and Learn 12:20 PM 11-29-2010
You can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink!!
As you probably know children's appetites can fluctuate a lot. I would just keep on doing what you are doing and not give her extra attention for not eating her meal. If she says that she is hungry before your scheduled afternoon snack do not feed her snack early....feel free to say...with lots of sympathy "I wish you had eaten more of your lunch" and then wait for snack time to roll around.....she will figure it out. She won't starve. She is either not hungry or looking for extra attention for not eating. Some parents turn themselves into short order cooks trying to accommodate picky eaters....not get what you get and you don't throw a fit. She is already getting a lunch packed by a loving parent full of nutritious food that the parent knows she will eat. Don't sweat can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink!
TGT09 12:29 PM 11-29-2010
Well come to find out she has been getting sick so I don't know how much that has played into it. She did a little better today. I'm kind of taking the route of what you said anyway Live and Learn. I know she's hungry but if she won't eat there is only so much I can do. I just feel bad for her.
Tags:meals, vegan
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