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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Help With Reply to Ticked DCM I Just Termed
midaycare 09:37 AM 08-03-2015
I asked dcm I my screamer girl to please pick her up at 11:30. She came and said she would call me tonight. I thought okay, cool. Then while the kids were eating, I texted her a quick text with my thoughts - basically giving her warning that I really like Janie, but it's not working out, so let's not plan on tomorrow because she is in agony while here. I suggested a very small home daycare or a nanny and said let's talk in more detail tonight. I Se t the text because dcm is a teacher and has summer off, but if she has something planned for tomorrow, I want her to have the opportunity to reschedule. Because dcg can't come back.
Dcm texted back she can't believe I am texting her while I am caring for so many kids. And, by the way, did something happen here today, because they tried another sitter last week and everything went great. She is also upset I would give her any recommendations only having seen her child a few times and only having "one year of experience" myself.
While one year of experience (almost 2) is correct, I have taught, been a school counselor, and worked with kids for a long, long time...
I don't want to regret writing something to her. So, my calm minded friends ... Help!
Dcm texted back she can't believe I am texting her while I am caring for so many kids. And, by the way, did something happen here today, because they tried another sitter last week and everything went great. She is also upset I would give her any recommendations only having seen her child a few times and only having "one year of experience" myself.
While one year of experience (almost 2) is correct, I have taught, been a school counselor, and worked with kids for a long, long time...
I don't want to regret writing something to her. So, my calm minded friends ... Help!
Thriftylady 09:43 AM 08-03-2015
This may be a situation where the less you say the better since you are admittedly worked up over it. So maybe just the blurb "sorry but this is a business decision not personal, and my decision if final" would be best. Especially where she "tried someone new" anyway. I mean apparently she was already looking, she is just mad you "dumped" her first. And who knows what the other provider really had from DCG that day.
Blackcat31 09:46 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
I asked dcm I my screamer girl to please pick her up at 11:30. She came and said she would call me tonight. I thought okay, cool. Then while the kids were eating, I texted her a quick text with my thoughts - basically giving her warning that I really like Hadley, but it's not working out, so let's not plan on tomorrow because she is in agony while here. I suggested a very small home daycare or a nanny and said let's talk in more detail tonight. I Se t the text because dcm is a teacher and has summer off, but if she has something planned for tomorrow, I want her to have the opportunity to reschedule. Because dcg can't come back.
Dcm texted back she can't believe I am texting her while I am caring for so many kids. And, by the way, did something happen here today, because they tried another sitter last week and everything went great. She is also upset I would give her any recommendations only having seen her child a few times and only having "one year of experience" myself.
While one year of experience (almost 2) is correct, I have taught, been a school counselor, and worked with kids for a long, long time...
I don't want to regret writing something to her. So, my calm minded friends ... Help!
What do you think was her point in mentioning that you are texting while caring for "so many other kids" comment was about? I asked dcm I my screamer girl to please pick her up at 11:30. She came and said she would call me tonight. I thought okay, cool. Then while the kids were eating, I texted her a quick text with my thoughts - basically giving her warning that I really like Hadley, but it's not working out, so let's not plan on tomorrow because she is in agony while here. I suggested a very small home daycare or a nanny and said let's talk in more detail tonight. I Se t the text because dcm is a teacher and has summer off, but if she has something planned for tomorrow, I want her to have the opportunity to reschedule. Because dcg can't come back.
Dcm texted back she can't believe I am texting her while I am caring for so many kids. And, by the way, did something happen here today, because they tried another sitter last week and everything went great. She is also upset I would give her any recommendations only having seen her child a few times and only having "one year of experience" myself.
While one year of experience (almost 2) is correct, I have taught, been a school counselor, and worked with kids for a long, long time...
I don't want to regret writing something to her. So, my calm minded friends ... Help!
I bet she is trying to pin the DCG's behavior on you as those statements say "she is fine everywhere else but with you so it must be you"
I would agree with her...text her back and don't mention the texting while other kids are in care comment (that was meant to get your goat in my opinion) and tell her what she wants to hear....
Text her back and say something like "DCM, I am so glad you mentioned her behavior while with another caregiver. That only further proves to me that I am not the right program to meet her needs as I have had no luck in trying any of the techniques I've been successful with in all my years of experience working with children. I think at this point, it would be best if you found another caregiver that can better meet DCG's needs. I am so glad you were able to have that other experience as it only further supports what I was already thinking. Thanks DCM! Let me know when you want to come by and get DCG's belongings"
That's how I'd move forward.
Blackcat31 09:47 AM 08-03-2015
Oh, and contact your licensor immediately to let her know what is going down. Or daycare mom will beat you too it and start making allegations about supervision etc since you are texting while caring for kids... 
Thriftylady 09:49 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
What do you think was her point in mentioning that you are texting while caring for "so many other kids" comment was about?
I bet she is trying to pin the DCG's behavior on you as those statements say "she is fine everywhere else but with you so it must be you"
I would agree with her...text her back and don't mention the texting while other kids are in care comment (that was meant to get your goat in my opinion) and tell her what she wants to hear....
Text her back and say something like "DCM, I am so glad you mentioned her behavior while with another caregiver. That only further proves to me that I am not the right program to meet her needs as I have had no luck in trying any of the techniques I've been successful with in all my years of experience working with children. I think at this point, it would be best if you found another caregiver that can better meet DCG's needs. I am so glad you were able to have that other experience as it only further supports what I was already thinking. Thanks DCM! Let me know when you want to come by and get DCG's belongings"
That's how I'd move forward.
Heh not a bad idea. You would be giving in, but you still get what you want out of it, so who cares lol. She can think she won if she wants, and you get your peace back.What do you think was her point in mentioning that you are texting while caring for "so many other kids" comment was about?
I bet she is trying to pin the DCG's behavior on you as those statements say "she is fine everywhere else but with you so it must be you"
I would agree with her...text her back and don't mention the texting while other kids are in care comment (that was meant to get your goat in my opinion) and tell her what she wants to hear....
Text her back and say something like "DCM, I am so glad you mentioned her behavior while with another caregiver. That only further proves to me that I am not the right program to meet her needs as I have had no luck in trying any of the techniques I've been successful with in all my years of experience working with children. I think at this point, it would be best if you found another caregiver that can better meet DCG's needs. I am so glad you were able to have that other experience as it only further supports what I was already thinking. Thanks DCM! Let me know when you want to come by and get DCG's belongings"
That's how I'd move forward.
Play Care 10:00 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
What do you think was her point in mentioning that you are texting while caring for "so many other kids" comment was about?
I bet she is trying to pin the DCG's behavior on you as those statements say "she is fine everywhere else but with you so it must be you"
I would agree with her...text her back and don't mention the texting while other kids are in care comment (that was meant to get your goat in my opinion) and tell her what she wants to hear....
Text her back and say something like "DCM, I am so glad you mentioned her behavior while with another caregiver. That only further proves to me that I am not the right program to meet her needs as I have had no luck in trying any of the techniques I've been successful with in all my years of experience working with children. I think at this point, it would be best if you found another caregiver that can better meet DCG's needs. I am so glad you were able to have that other experience as it only further supports what I was already thinking. Thanks DCM! Let me know when you want to come by and get DCG's belongings"
That's how I'd move forward.
Perfect!What do you think was her point in mentioning that you are texting while caring for "so many other kids" comment was about?
I bet she is trying to pin the DCG's behavior on you as those statements say "she is fine everywhere else but with you so it must be you"
I would agree with her...text her back and don't mention the texting while other kids are in care comment (that was meant to get your goat in my opinion) and tell her what she wants to hear....
Text her back and say something like "DCM, I am so glad you mentioned her behavior while with another caregiver. That only further proves to me that I am not the right program to meet her needs as I have had no luck in trying any of the techniques I've been successful with in all my years of experience working with children. I think at this point, it would be best if you found another caregiver that can better meet DCG's needs. I am so glad you were able to have that other experience as it only further supports what I was already thinking. Thanks DCM! Let me know when you want to come by and get DCG's belongings"
That's how I'd move forward.
midaycare 10:10 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
What do you think was her point in mentioning that you are texting while caring for "so many other kids" comment was about?
I bet she is trying to pin the DCG's behavior on you as those statements say "she is fine everywhere else but with you so it must be you"
I would agree with her...text her back and don't mention the texting while other kids are in care comment (that was meant to get your goat in my opinion) and tell her what she wants to hear....
Text her back and say something like "DCM, I am so glad you mentioned her behavior while with another caregiver. That only further proves to me that I am not the right program to meet her needs as I have had no luck in trying any of the techniques I've been successful with in all my years of experience working with children. I think at this point, it would be best if you found another caregiver that can better meet DCG's needs. I am so glad you were able to have that other experience as it only further supports what I was already thinking. Thanks DCM! Let me know when you want to come by and get DCG's belongings"
That's how I'd move forward.
But ... But ... I really want to give it to her ... What do you think was her point in mentioning that you are texting while caring for "so many other kids" comment was about?
I bet she is trying to pin the DCG's behavior on you as those statements say "she is fine everywhere else but with you so it must be you"
I would agree with her...text her back and don't mention the texting while other kids are in care comment (that was meant to get your goat in my opinion) and tell her what she wants to hear....
Text her back and say something like "DCM, I am so glad you mentioned her behavior while with another caregiver. That only further proves to me that I am not the right program to meet her needs as I have had no luck in trying any of the techniques I've been successful with in all my years of experience working with children. I think at this point, it would be best if you found another caregiver that can better meet DCG's needs. I am so glad you were able to have that other experience as it only further supports what I was already thinking. Thanks DCM! Let me know when you want to come by and get DCG's belongings"
That's how I'd move forward.
I have very unprofessional things I want to say right now. If only I could say them.
MrsSteinel'sHouse 10:13 AM 08-03-2015
what blackcat said.. then put down the phone and walk away.... walk. away.
Thriftylady 10:25 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
But ... But ... I really want to give it to her ... I have very unprofessional things I want to say right now. If only I could say them.
I get that, but that is also the reason not to say those things, you are just to angry and might regret it later.But ... But ... I really want to give it to her ...
I have very unprofessional things I want to say right now. If only I could say them.
midaycare 10:25 AM 08-03-2015
I did it; word for word what BC said. Except she doesn't have anything here, and dcm paid for this week & I told her not to worry about it, I would not cash the check.
Thriftylady 10:27 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
I did it; word for word what BC said. Except she doesn't have anything here, and dcm paid for this week & I told her not to worry about it, I would not cash the check.
Good! I know it sucks though. I would mail her check back.I did it; word for word what BC said. Except she doesn't have anything here, and dcm paid for this week & I told her not to worry about it, I would not cash the check.
Play Care 10:32 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
But ... But ... I really want to give it to her ... I have very unprofessional things I want to say right now. If only I could say them.
I know, but the beauty of BC's reply is that it's just soooo freaking perfect. You've made it so mom has no leg to stand on. She can't really argue back, because the she'd have to admit she's lying. But ... But ... I really want to give it to her ...
I have very unprofessional things I want to say right now. If only I could say them.She's literally backed herself into a corner.
Had you went at her guns blazing (figuratively, of course) you would have only given her more ammunition to fire back.
I'd be really surprised if she keeps up with it - you really took the wind out of her sails
e.j. 11:31 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by Play Care:
Had you went at her guns blazing (figuratively, of course) you would have only given her more ammunition to fire back.
I'd be really surprised if she keeps up with it - you really took the wind out of her sails
Had you went at her guns blazing (figuratively, of course) you would have only given her more ammunition to fire back.
I'd be really surprised if she keeps up with it - you really took the wind out of her sails
Exactly! Besides, if you really want to say those unprofessional things, you still can. Just post it here or in the Venting thread instead of sending it to her and then enjoy a calm evening and a peaceful day tomorrow!
Blackcat31 11:41 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by e.j.:
Exactly!
Besides, if you really want to say those unprofessional things, you still can. Just post it here or in the Venting thread instead of sending it to her and then enjoy a calm evening and a peaceful day tomorrow!
YES!! I'd like to hear them! Exactly! Besides, if you really want to say those unprofessional things, you still can. Just post it here or in the Venting thread instead of sending it to her and then enjoy a calm evening and a peaceful day tomorrow!
Only because it DOES feel good to get them out and it's quite therapeutic too!
Sugar Magnolia 11:50 AM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
I asked dcm I my screamer girl to please pick her up at 11:30. She came and said she would call me tonight. I thought okay, cool. Then while the kids were eating, I texted her a quick text with my thoughts - basically giving her warning that I really like Hadley, but it's not working out, so let's not plan on tomorrow because she is in agony while here. I suggested a very small home daycare or a nanny and said let's talk in more detail tonight. I Se t the text because dcm is a teacher and has summer off, but if she has something planned for tomorrow, I want her to have the opportunity to reschedule. Because dcg can't come back.
Dcm texted back she can't believe I am texting her while I am caring for so many kids. And, by the way, did something happen here today, because they tried another sitter last week and everything went great. She is also upset I would give her any recommendations only having seen her child a few times and only having "one year of experience" myself.
While one year of experience (almost 2) is correct, I have taught, been a school counselor, and worked with kids for a long, long time...
I don't want to regret writing something to her. So, my calm minded friends ... Help!
I know I'm late to this thread, I've been keeping up with your posts on this whole situation. What a mess, really sorry you are going through a tough term. Hugs to you. I asked dcm I my screamer girl to please pick her up at 11:30. She came and said she would call me tonight. I thought okay, cool. Then while the kids were eating, I texted her a quick text with my thoughts - basically giving her warning that I really like Hadley, but it's not working out, so let's not plan on tomorrow because she is in agony while here. I suggested a very small home daycare or a nanny and said let's talk in more detail tonight. I Se t the text because dcm is a teacher and has summer off, but if she has something planned for tomorrow, I want her to have the opportunity to reschedule. Because dcg can't come back.
Dcm texted back she can't believe I am texting her while I am caring for so many kids. And, by the way, did something happen here today, because they tried another sitter last week and everything went great. She is also upset I would give her any recommendations only having seen her child a few times and only having "one year of experience" myself.
While one year of experience (almost 2) is correct, I have taught, been a school counselor, and worked with kids for a long, long time...
I don't want to regret writing something to her. So, my calm minded friends ... Help!
I think I would just stop communicating with her completely at this point. Send her the check in the mail and never look back. Be calm and march on. I think you handled it fine.
midaycare 12:08 PM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
YES!! I'd like to hear them!
Only because it DOES feel good to get them out and it's quite therapeutic too!
Dear dcm,YES!! I'd like to hear them!
Only because it DOES feel good to get them out and it's quite therapeutic too!
I'm so sorry you don't fit in my program because you coddled your child for her whole life. If she did well at her other daycare, you shouldn't have moved her. And I highly doubt she did well. And my dear, Spanish teacher dcm, when someone fails one of your tests, are you the problem, if everyone else is succeeding? I think not. It is no different in child care.
For your information dcm, I get anywhere up to 5 calls per day for child care. So I think I'm doing something right, with as little experience as you believe me to have. Oh, and the state also gave me the highest STAR rating within a 40 mile radius. But, that's not important, right? What's important is that YOU take some digs at me and try to make me feel stupid and uneducated even though I have more education than you and I've also taught. Beotch!
Blackcat31 12:20 PM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
Dear dcm,
I'm so sorry you don't fit in my program because you coddled your child for her whole life. If she did well at her other daycare, you shouldn't have moved her. And I highly doubt she did well. And my dear, Spanish teacher dcm, when someone fails one of your tests, are you the problem, if everyone else is succeeding? I think not. It is no different in child care.
For your information dcm, I get anywhere up to 5 calls per day for child care. So I think I'm doing something right, with as little experience as you believe me to have. Oh, and the state also gave me the highest STAR rating within a 40 mile radius. But, that's not important, right? What's important is that YOU take some digs at me and try to make me feel stupid and uneducated even though I have more education than you and I've also taught. Beotch!
Dear dcm,
I'm so sorry you don't fit in my program because you coddled your child for her whole life. If she did well at her other daycare, you shouldn't have moved her. And I highly doubt she did well. And my dear, Spanish teacher dcm, when someone fails one of your tests, are you the problem, if everyone else is succeeding? I think not. It is no different in child care.
For your information dcm, I get anywhere up to 5 calls per day for child care. So I think I'm doing something right, with as little experience as you believe me to have. Oh, and the state also gave me the highest STAR rating within a 40 mile radius. But, that's not important, right? What's important is that YOU take some digs at me and try to make me feel stupid and uneducated even though I have more education than you and I've also taught. Beotch!
AWESOME!! I love it!!
Bet you feel better now don't you?
Baby Beluga 12:33 PM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
Dear dcm,
I'm so sorry you don't fit in my program because you coddled your child for her whole life. If she did well at her other daycare, you shouldn't have moved her. And I highly doubt she did well. And my dear, Spanish teacher dcm, when someone fails one of your tests, are you the problem, if everyone else is succeeding? I think not. It is no different in child care.
For your information dcm, I get anywhere up to 5 calls per day for child care. So I think I'm doing something right, with as little experience as you believe me to have. Oh, and the state also gave me the highest STAR rating within a 40 mile radius. But, that's not important, right? What's important is that YOU take some digs at me and try to make me feel stupid and uneducated even though I have more education than you and I've also taught. Beotch!
Dear dcm,
I'm so sorry you don't fit in my program because you coddled your child for her whole life. If she did well at her other daycare, you shouldn't have moved her. And I highly doubt she did well. And my dear, Spanish teacher dcm, when someone fails one of your tests, are you the problem, if everyone else is succeeding? I think not. It is no different in child care.
For your information dcm, I get anywhere up to 5 calls per day for child care. So I think I'm doing something right, with as little experience as you believe me to have. Oh, and the state also gave me the highest STAR rating within a 40 mile radius. But, that's not important, right? What's important is that YOU take some digs at me and try to make me feel stupid and uneducated even though I have more education than you and I've also taught. Beotch!
especially enjoyed the bold part
midaycare 01:03 PM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
AWESOME!! I love it!!
Bet you feel better now don't you?
I really do feel better!AWESOME!! I love it!!
Bet you feel better now don't you?
midaycare 01:06 PM 08-03-2015
Instead of being in a motorcycle gang, I feel like I'm in a daycare gang. And instead of beating people up, we send out bad vibes towards people.
Josiegirl 02:19 PM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
Instead of being in a motorcycle gang, I feel like I'm in a daycare gang. And instead of beating people up, we send out bad vibes towards people.
I feel like some of us probably are hiding voodoo dolls in our closets too. Instead of being in a motorcycle gang, I feel like I'm in a daycare gang. And instead of beating people up, we send out bad vibes towards people.
I love how it ended up but sorry she put you through all that crap.
childcaremom 03:07 PM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
Instead of being in a motorcycle gang, I feel like I'm in a daycare gang.
Instead of being in a motorcycle gang, I feel like I'm in a daycare gang.
Love it!
Thriftylady 05:43 PM 08-03-2015
Originally Posted by midaycare:
Instead of being in a motorcycle gang, I feel like I'm in a daycare gang. And instead of beating people up, we send out bad vibes towards people.
Hmm VROOM VROOM or SCREAM SCREAM. Ever feel like we picked the wrong gang? LOL. Although I can say from experience that motorcycles can be annoying just like parents, but it is usually when they won't start so you don't have to listen to them lol.Instead of being in a motorcycle gang, I feel like I'm in a daycare gang. And instead of beating people up, we send out bad vibes towards people.
Laurel 10:18 AM 08-04-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
What do you think was her point in mentioning that you are texting while caring for "so many other kids" comment was about?
I bet she is trying to pin the DCG's behavior on you as those statements say "she is fine everywhere else but with you so it must be you"
I would agree with her...text her back and don't mention the texting while other kids are in care comment (that was meant to get your goat in my opinion) and tell her what she wants to hear....
Text her back and say something like "DCM, I am so glad you mentioned her behavior while with another caregiver. That only further proves to me that I am not the right program to meet her needs as I have had no luck in trying any of the techniques I've been successful with in all my years of experience working with children. I think at this point, it would be best if you found another caregiver that can better meet DCG's needs. I am so glad you were able to have that other experience as it only further supports what I was already thinking. Thanks DCM! Let me know when you want to come by and get DCG's belongings"
That's how I'd move forward.
Whoo hoo, that's great!!!What do you think was her point in mentioning that you are texting while caring for "so many other kids" comment was about?
I bet she is trying to pin the DCG's behavior on you as those statements say "she is fine everywhere else but with you so it must be you"
I would agree with her...text her back and don't mention the texting while other kids are in care comment (that was meant to get your goat in my opinion) and tell her what she wants to hear....
Text her back and say something like "DCM, I am so glad you mentioned her behavior while with another caregiver. That only further proves to me that I am not the right program to meet her needs as I have had no luck in trying any of the techniques I've been successful with in all my years of experience working with children. I think at this point, it would be best if you found another caregiver that can better meet DCG's needs. I am so glad you were able to have that other experience as it only further supports what I was already thinking. Thanks DCM! Let me know when you want to come by and get DCG's belongings"
That's how I'd move forward.
Laurel
P.S. We need a clapping hands smilie. I am getting tired of this one.
Just saying....
AmyKidsCo 11:55 AM 08-04-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
YES!! I'd like to hear them!
Only because it DOES feel good to get them out and it's quite therapeutic too!
Yup! I can't count how many nastygrams I've typed up then deleted. YES!! I'd like to hear them!
Only because it DOES feel good to get them out and it's quite therapeutic too!
