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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>DCM Wants to do Away with Nap!
mamamanda 05:49 AM 07-16-2014
Dcm approached me yesterday with concerns about naptime. Apparently her children are fighting bedtime and it takes her like an hour and a half to get them to go to sleep. She is concerned b/c she now has no "alone time." Of course, she tries to put them to bed very early anyway. She is considering having me do away with nap time during the day so that bed time will be easier for her. I said no. Her children are 2 and almost 4. They both complain they are tired all morning long, are asleep within 5-10 minutes of laying down at nap, and sleep for a solid 2 hours. They would sleep more than that if I allowed it. They are exhausted.
Also, these are the same children that are not able to entertain themselves for even a few minutes during the day. It's constantly, "go play" all day long so I feel that very honestly I would not be able to maintain my sanity if they didn't nap.
If I needed yet another reason, here are 3 more. I only have 3 FT kids right now, but all of my dck are 4 or under so if these 2 don't nap I'm going to have a really hard time getting anyone else to. Having 20 minutes of "quiet time" on a blanket has proven impossible with these 2 children so there's no way they would sit quietly while others sleep anyway. And finally, I am expecting a new baby next month and am counting on nap time as some down time for the baby and myself to help us with the transition.
I told dcm I could wake them up a half hour earlier or lay them down a little bit earlier, but doing away with nap is not a possibility right now. She said we will just see how the night goes and talk about it tomorrow. Then she texted me a few minutes ago saying they will be late b/c it was such a rough night. Is it unprofessional of me to refuse to completely do away with nap time for a 2 & 3 year old? Are there actual regulations on that at all? I'm not licensed, so I don't really know what the "rules" are regarding nap. I honestly feel like if she insists on this I will have to term over it. I love these children very much, but they are very high maintenance and I have to make a lot of exceptions with them and I feel like this would put me over my ability to handle them.
Also, these are the same children that are not able to entertain themselves for even a few minutes during the day. It's constantly, "go play" all day long so I feel that very honestly I would not be able to maintain my sanity if they didn't nap.
If I needed yet another reason, here are 3 more. I only have 3 FT kids right now, but all of my dck are 4 or under so if these 2 don't nap I'm going to have a really hard time getting anyone else to. Having 20 minutes of "quiet time" on a blanket has proven impossible with these 2 children so there's no way they would sit quietly while others sleep anyway. And finally, I am expecting a new baby next month and am counting on nap time as some down time for the baby and myself to help us with the transition.
I told dcm I could wake them up a half hour earlier or lay them down a little bit earlier, but doing away with nap is not a possibility right now. She said we will just see how the night goes and talk about it tomorrow. Then she texted me a few minutes ago saying they will be late b/c it was such a rough night. Is it unprofessional of me to refuse to completely do away with nap time for a 2 & 3 year old? Are there actual regulations on that at all? I'm not licensed, so I don't really know what the "rules" are regarding nap. I honestly feel like if she insists on this I will have to term over it. I love these children very much, but they are very high maintenance and I have to make a lot of exceptions with them and I feel like this would put me over my ability to handle them.
nannyde 06:01 AM 07-16-2014
Blackcat31 06:14 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by mamamanda:
Dcm approached me yesterday with concerns about naptime. Apparently her children are fighting bedtime and it takes her like an hour and a half to get them to go to sleep. She is concerned b/c she now has no "alone time." Of course, she tries to put them to bed very early anyway. She is considering having me do away with nap time during the day so that bed time will be easier for her. I said no. Her children are 2 and almost 4. They both complain they are tired all morning long, are asleep within 5-10 minutes of laying down at nap, and sleep for a solid 2 hours. They would sleep more than that if I allowed it. They are exhausted.
Also, these are the same children that are not able to entertain themselves for even a few minutes during the day. It's constantly, "go play" all day long so I feel that very honestly I would not be able to maintain my sanity if they didn't nap.
If I needed yet another reason, here are 3 more. I only have 3 FT kids right now, but all of my dck are 4 or under so if these 2 don't nap I'm going to have a really hard time getting anyone else to. Having 20 minutes of "quiet time" on a blanket has proven impossible with these 2 children so there's no way they would sit quietly while others sleep anyway. And finally, I am expecting a new baby next month and am counting on nap time as some down time for the baby and myself to help us with the transition.
I told dcm I could wake them up a half hour earlier or lay them down a little bit earlier, but doing away with nap is not a possibility right now. She said we will just see how the night goes and talk about it tomorrow. Then she texted me a few minutes ago saying they will be late b/c it was such a rough night. Is it unprofessional of me to refuse to completely do away with nap time for a 2 & 3 year old? Are there actual regulations on that at all? I'm not licensed, so I don't really know what the "rules" are regarding nap. I honestly feel like if she insists on this I will have to term over it. I love these children very much, but they are very high maintenance and I have to make a lot of exceptions with them and I feel like this would put me over my ability to handle them.
I do not provide care to children that have outgrown nap. Dcm approached me yesterday with concerns about naptime. Apparently her children are fighting bedtime and it takes her like an hour and a half to get them to go to sleep. She is concerned b/c she now has no "alone time." Of course, she tries to put them to bed very early anyway. She is considering having me do away with nap time during the day so that bed time will be easier for her. I said no. Her children are 2 and almost 4. They both complain they are tired all morning long, are asleep within 5-10 minutes of laying down at nap, and sleep for a solid 2 hours. They would sleep more than that if I allowed it. They are exhausted.
Also, these are the same children that are not able to entertain themselves for even a few minutes during the day. It's constantly, "go play" all day long so I feel that very honestly I would not be able to maintain my sanity if they didn't nap.
If I needed yet another reason, here are 3 more. I only have 3 FT kids right now, but all of my dck are 4 or under so if these 2 don't nap I'm going to have a really hard time getting anyone else to. Having 20 minutes of "quiet time" on a blanket has proven impossible with these 2 children so there's no way they would sit quietly while others sleep anyway. And finally, I am expecting a new baby next month and am counting on nap time as some down time for the baby and myself to help us with the transition.
I told dcm I could wake them up a half hour earlier or lay them down a little bit earlier, but doing away with nap is not a possibility right now. She said we will just see how the night goes and talk about it tomorrow. Then she texted me a few minutes ago saying they will be late b/c it was such a rough night. Is it unprofessional of me to refuse to completely do away with nap time for a 2 & 3 year old? Are there actual regulations on that at all? I'm not licensed, so I don't really know what the "rules" are regarding nap. I honestly feel like if she insists on this I will have to term over it. I love these children very much, but they are very high maintenance and I have to make a lot of exceptions with them and I feel like this would put me over my ability to handle them.
ALL children here rest. I cannot force them to sleep.
Contrary to popular belief, napping for kids under 5/6 years old has NO bearing on whether they go to bed at night or not.
Unless of course, the nap occurs late in the day. Otherwise, there is NO SCIENTIFIC evidence that says children who nap at child care will fight bed time at home.
IMHO, that is a parental issue not a sleep issue. My own kids had a required bed time and regular bedtime routine each every night. Sometimes they went to sleep easily and quickly and other times they had to lay there a bit before drifting off.
Either way, the bed time routine did not waiver. THAT is what sets the tone for healthy sleep habits and good bedtime behavior.
As for you outright saying to her that you will not with hold nap time from her children, that's up to you. It's YOUR business. But that is exactly what I would do.
Indoorvoice 06:18 AM 07-16-2014
When a mom asked me to do this with her then 18 month old I just told her that my program has a rest time from 1-3. The kids are required to sit quietly and do quiet activities or they can sleep, but the sleeping part is up to them. Just like you can't force a child to sleep, you can't force a child to stay awake.
CraftyMom 06:21 AM 07-16-2014
No way I would do away with nap for that age, or any kid in my group (I only take 5 and under now)
Sounds like mom needs a better night time routine. Her kids are fighting and not settling down, how is that your issue? Mom needs to figure out her own issues
Sounds like mom needs a better night time routine. Her kids are fighting and not settling down, how is that your issue? Mom needs to figure out her own issues
Angelsj 06:28 AM 07-16-2014
I actually have several who do not nap. I even let them watch a movie. However, do NOT get up, move around or bother me during that time. If they have to use the restroom, they may go and then go lay back down.
I would just tell her no. This is our break time; rest break is not an optional activity.
I would just tell her no. This is our break time; rest break is not an optional activity.
daycarediva 06:37 AM 07-16-2014
You arent requiring them to sleep, you are providing an appropriate rest period. If they fall asleep they are obviously tired and need to rest. It's also group care so you have to do what's best for the group as a whole. My only suggestions to mom would be to get a better bedtime routine and a good bedtime that stays consistent. Also, waking them at the same time each day, regardless of when they went to bed.
She's trying to make it do that her kids are do tired they are in bed right after dinner. No parenting at its finest.
My only offer would be to bump nap time 30minutes earlier in the day so they are awake earlier (if it would work for you).
All of my kids are required to rest, even my OWN SA kids. My 5 & 6 yo's fall asleep half the time. My own 6yo has NO issue taking a 90m nap and then falling asleep at 8:30.
She's trying to make it do that her kids are do tired they are in bed right after dinner. No parenting at its finest.
My only offer would be to bump nap time 30minutes earlier in the day so they are awake earlier (if it would work for you).
All of my kids are required to rest, even my OWN SA kids. My 5 & 6 yo's fall asleep half the time. My own 6yo has NO issue taking a 90m nap and then falling asleep at 8:30.
mamamanda 06:43 AM 07-16-2014
Ok. I will just stand by my "no." Good to know I'm not being unfair. The "sleep fairy" visited them last night leaving chocolate & bracelets so apparently they went to bed easier. They asked my ds if sleep fairy came here too. I answered for him & said, "Ds doesn't need the sleep fairy. He just goes to sleep in his own bed b/c he's a big boy." Hopefully that will be the end of it. Lol Always some struggle.
CraftyMom 06:49 AM 07-16-2014
I had a dcm pick her daughter up early yesterday, right before nap. Dcg will sleep here for 3 hours easy.
Mom just told me they went straight home and they BOTH slept for 3 solid hours. Mom was going on and on about how refreshed she herself felt after her long nap, and how they both went to bed at their normal bedtime with no trouble and she feels great today.
Even adults benefit from an afternoon nap!
Mom just told me they went straight home and they BOTH slept for 3 solid hours. Mom was going on and on about how refreshed she herself felt after her long nap, and how they both went to bed at their normal bedtime with no trouble and she feels great today.
Even adults benefit from an afternoon nap!
MissAnn 08:14 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by altandra:
When a mom asked me to do this with her then 18 month old I just told her that my program has a rest time from 1-3. The kids are required to sit quietly and do quiet activities or they can sleep, but the sleeping part is up to them. Just like you can't force a child to sleep, you can't force a child to stay awake.
What quiet activities do you offer? I want my kids to lay down. They can bring books but they have to lay down with them. I also play audio books all through nap. Wondering about quiet activities.....not sure I want to incorporate that though.When a mom asked me to do this with her then 18 month old I just told her that my program has a rest time from 1-3. The kids are required to sit quietly and do quiet activities or they can sleep, but the sleeping part is up to them. Just like you can't force a child to sleep, you can't force a child to stay awake.
MissAnn 08:25 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
You arent requiring them to sleep, you are providing an appropriate rest period. If they fall asleep they are obviously tired and need to rest. It's also group care so you have to do what's best for the group as a whole. My only suggestions to mom would be to get a better bedtime routine and a good bedtime that stays consistent. Also, waking them at the same time each day, regardless of when they went to bed.
She's trying to make it do that her kids are do tired they are in bed right after dinner. No parenting at its finest.
My only offer would be to bump nap time 30minutes earlier in the day so they are awake earlier (if it would work for you).
All of my kids are required to rest, even my OWN SA kids. My 5 & 6 yo's fall asleep half the time. My own 6yo has NO issue taking a 90m nap and then falling asleep at 8:30.
I've suggested a better routine to some of my parents. They seem to take offense. They ALL say their child just does not require as much sleep as other kids. I tell them that sleep begets sleep.....that kids (and people) do not sleep well when they are overtired. One particular mom said her daughter is up till midnight. Here....she takes an hour to fall asleep. This cannot be "how much sleep she needs"......it's not enough...she gets up at 7:00. Last night I read on Facebook from her babysitter that she just loves her "little night owl".....she was UP, PLAYING and LAUGHING at midnight! Well....ya got to put the kid to bed if you want her to sleep. I just tell the moms they don't have to go to sleep...they can read books or listen to audiobooks I have playing. You arent requiring them to sleep, you are providing an appropriate rest period. If they fall asleep they are obviously tired and need to rest. It's also group care so you have to do what's best for the group as a whole. My only suggestions to mom would be to get a better bedtime routine and a good bedtime that stays consistent. Also, waking them at the same time each day, regardless of when they went to bed.
She's trying to make it do that her kids are do tired they are in bed right after dinner. No parenting at its finest.
My only offer would be to bump nap time 30minutes earlier in the day so they are awake earlier (if it would work for you).
All of my kids are required to rest, even my OWN SA kids. My 5 & 6 yo's fall asleep half the time. My own 6yo has NO issue taking a 90m nap and then falling asleep at 8:30.
Anyone have some good literature for parents to read? Not a whole book...they would never do that.
MissAnn 08:26 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by CraftyMom:
I had a dcm pick her daughter up early yesterday, right before nap. Dcg will sleep here for 3 hours easy.
Mom just told me they went straight home and they BOTH slept for 3 solid hours. Mom was going on and on about how refreshed she herself felt after her long nap, and how they both went to bed at their normal bedtime with no trouble and she feels great today.
Even adults benefit from an afternoon nap!
I had a dcm pick her daughter up early yesterday, right before nap. Dcg will sleep here for 3 hours easy.
Mom just told me they went straight home and they BOTH slept for 3 solid hours. Mom was going on and on about how refreshed she herself felt after her long nap, and how they both went to bed at their normal bedtime with no trouble and she feels great today.
Even adults benefit from an afternoon nap!
daycare 08:38 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by mamamanda:
Ok. I will just stand by my "no." Good to know I'm not being unfair. The "sleep fairy" visited them last night leaving chocolate & bracelets so apparently they went to bed easier. They asked my ds if sleep fairy came here too. I answered for him & said, "Ds doesn't need the sleep fairy. He just goes to sleep in his own bed b/c he's a big boy." Hopefully that will be the end of it. Lol Always some struggle.
WTH??? Sleep Fairy...............I can't stand parents these days...Ok. I will just stand by my "no." Good to know I'm not being unfair. The "sleep fairy" visited them last night leaving chocolate & bracelets so apparently they went to bed easier. They asked my ds if sleep fairy came here too. I answered for him & said, "Ds doesn't need the sleep fairy. He just goes to sleep in his own bed b/c he's a big boy." Hopefully that will be the end of it. Lol Always some struggle.
Just knock it off and go to bed already. Put your smart phone down, tivo your tv programs and get off the computer.
goes to show that mom has no self control and no ability to prioritize her life.
Blackcat31 09:02 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by MissAnn:
Anyone have some good literature for parents to read? Not a whole book...they would never do that.
I give this to all my parentsAnyone have some good literature for parents to read? Not a whole book...they would never do that.
http://parentchildhelp.com/PDF/brochure.pdf
CraftyMom 09:42 AM 07-16-2014
Do you mind if we use the brochure BlackCat?
Indoorvoice 09:46 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by MissAnn:
What quiet activities do you offer? I want my kids to lay down. They can bring books but they have to lay down with them. I also play audio books all through nap. Wondering about quiet activities.....not sure I want to incorporate that though.
I have to preface this by saying that I have really lucked out with kids that just "get" quiet time and understand it's non-negotiable. They don't test me on this. I probably wouldn't be able to allow the activities that I allow with just any child. I turn on soothing music and the kids are allowed to pick 3 things to take with them on their cot. I have books, puzzles, mini felt boards with felt pieces, lacing boards, large beads to string, and file folder games to choose from. They know they can only pick 3 and that they cannot switch. Once they are bored with their choices, too bad so sad. They also know that if any of the activities become loud, that they lose it. Most play for 10 or so minutes and then fall right asleep. I have one dcb3 that will play quietly the whole 2 hours. He doesn't nap at home either. But I'm fine with that because he does great and I go about my business without having to direct him at all.What quiet activities do you offer? I want my kids to lay down. They can bring books but they have to lay down with them. I also play audio books all through nap. Wondering about quiet activities.....not sure I want to incorporate that though.
Blackcat31 09:46 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by CraftyMom:
Do you mind if we use the brochure BlackCat?
It isn't mine Do you mind if we use the brochure BlackCat?
....I got it from a training a while back so feel free to do whatever you'd like.
Naptime yet? 09:58 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by daycare:
WTH??? Sleep Fairy...............I can't stand parents these days...
Just knock it off and go to bed already. Put your smart phone down, tivo your tv programs and get off the computer.
goes to show that mom has no self control and no ability to prioritize her life.
WTH??? Sleep Fairy...............I can't stand parents these days...
Just knock it off and go to bed already. Put your smart phone down, tivo your tv programs and get off the computer.
goes to show that mom has no self control and no ability to prioritize her life.
Chocolate?!? Why not leave them Pixie Straws and tell them it's magical fairy dust???
CraftyMom 10:07 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by Naptime yet?:
Chocolate?!? Why not leave them Pixie Straws and tell them it's magical fairy dust???
I was thinking "Ok, they are having trouble settling down at night...so let's have the sleep fairy bring them chocolate! That will solve it!" Chocolate?!? Why not leave them Pixie Straws and tell them it's magical fairy dust???
midaycare 10:55 AM 07-16-2014
The Sleep Fairy?
Being a parent is work. My 6 year old has a looooong bedtime routine, but we love it. It's our special time together.
I am one of the rare people that naps do affect. If I nap, I can't sleep at night. The same with my DS. He stopped napping around age 2 or 2.5. But he did quiet time every day. I think once in a great while he fell asleep at daycare. But I never asked his home daycare provider not to give him a nap or rest time. Little bodies need that! Plus, it was her business, so ... her rules.
Being a parent is work. My 6 year old has a looooong bedtime routine, but we love it. It's our special time together.
I am one of the rare people that naps do affect. If I nap, I can't sleep at night. The same with my DS. He stopped napping around age 2 or 2.5. But he did quiet time every day. I think once in a great while he fell asleep at daycare. But I never asked his home daycare provider not to give him a nap or rest time. Little bodies need that! Plus, it was her business, so ... her rules.
daycarediva 11:06 AM 07-16-2014
I wish that brochure listed recommended sleep times for children younger than SA!
I have one dcm who says kiddo can get by on 6-7 hours and is 'just fine'.
Yup, because falling asleep anytime he sits for more than a few minutes is NORMAL.
I have one dcm who says kiddo can get by on 6-7 hours and is 'just fine'.
Yup, because falling asleep anytime he sits for more than a few minutes is NORMAL.
nannyde 11:08 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
I wish that brochure listed recommended sleep times for children younger than SA!
I have one dcm who says kiddo can get by on 6-7 hours and is 'just fine'.
Yup, because falling asleep anytime he sits for more than a few minutes is NORMAL.
Recommended times only apply to normal kids not gifted kids. I wish that brochure listed recommended sleep times for children younger than SA!
I have one dcm who says kiddo can get by on 6-7 hours and is 'just fine'.
Yup, because falling asleep anytime he sits for more than a few minutes is NORMAL.
My3cents 11:15 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by mamamanda:
Ok. I will just stand by my "no." Good to know I'm not being unfair. The "sleep fairy" visited them last night leaving chocolate & bracelets so apparently they went to bed easier. They asked my ds if sleep fairy came here too. I answered for him & said, "Ds doesn't need the sleep fairy. He just goes to sleep in his own bed b/c he's a big boy." Hopefully that will be the end of it. Lol Always some struggle.
tons of info on this subject here do a search for nap, nap time issues-Ok. I will just stand by my "no." Good to know I'm not being unfair. The "sleep fairy" visited them last night leaving chocolate & bracelets so apparently they went to bed easier. They asked my ds if sleep fairy came here too. I answered for him & said, "Ds doesn't need the sleep fairy. He just goes to sleep in his own bed b/c he's a big boy." Hopefully that will be the end of it. Lol Always some struggle.
welcome
no way would I allow a parent to tell me a child I have full time with me is not going to have a rest time because they want time to themselves at night
no way, not here, not now- know no how............NO
kids need rest, providers need a break and its not a true break because we don't shut off at break time we are still working.
NO NO NO
I am not willing to put up with little lulu being a monster the second half of the day- parent wants this they need to hire a nanny not group daycare
best
DaisyMamma 11:22 AM 07-16-2014
Originally Posted by mamamanda:
Dcm approached me yesterday with concerns about naptime. Apparently her children are fighting bedtime and it takes her like an hour and a half to get them to go to sleep. She is concerned b/c she now has no "alone time." Of course, she tries to put them to bed very early anyway. She is considering having me do away with nap time during the day so that bed time will be easier for her. I said no. Her children are 2 and almost 4. They both complain they are tired all morning long, are asleep within 5-10 minutes of laying down at nap, and sleep for a solid 2 hours. They would sleep more than that if I allowed it. They are exhausted.
Also, these are the same children that are not able to entertain themselves for even a few minutes during the day. It's constantly, "go play" all day long so I feel that very honestly I would not be able to maintain my sanity if they didn't nap.
If I needed yet another reason, here are 3 more. I only have 3 FT kids right now, but all of my dck are 4 or under so if these 2 don't nap I'm going to have a really hard time getting anyone else to. Having 20 minutes of "quiet time" on a blanket has proven impossible with these 2 children so there's no way they would sit quietly while others sleep anyway. And finally, I am expecting a new baby next month and am counting on nap time as some down time for the baby and myself to help us with the transition.
I told dcm I could wake them up a half hour earlier or lay them down a little bit earlier, but doing away with nap is not a possibility right now. She said we will just see how the night goes and talk about it tomorrow. Then she texted me a few minutes ago saying they will be late b/c it was such a rough night. Is it unprofessional of me to refuse to completely do away with nap time for a 2 & 3 year old? Are there actual regulations on that at all? I'm not licensed, so I don't really know what the "rules" are regarding nap. I honestly feel like if she insists on this I will have to term over it. I love these children very much, but they are very high maintenance and I have to make a lot of exceptions with them and I feel like this would put me over my ability to handle them.
Not unprofessional at all. Actually she will have a hard time finding a daycare that will keep them up during rest time. There's no way I would do it.Dcm approached me yesterday with concerns about naptime. Apparently her children are fighting bedtime and it takes her like an hour and a half to get them to go to sleep. She is concerned b/c she now has no "alone time." Of course, she tries to put them to bed very early anyway. She is considering having me do away with nap time during the day so that bed time will be easier for her. I said no. Her children are 2 and almost 4. They both complain they are tired all morning long, are asleep within 5-10 minutes of laying down at nap, and sleep for a solid 2 hours. They would sleep more than that if I allowed it. They are exhausted.
Also, these are the same children that are not able to entertain themselves for even a few minutes during the day. It's constantly, "go play" all day long so I feel that very honestly I would not be able to maintain my sanity if they didn't nap.
If I needed yet another reason, here are 3 more. I only have 3 FT kids right now, but all of my dck are 4 or under so if these 2 don't nap I'm going to have a really hard time getting anyone else to. Having 20 minutes of "quiet time" on a blanket has proven impossible with these 2 children so there's no way they would sit quietly while others sleep anyway. And finally, I am expecting a new baby next month and am counting on nap time as some down time for the baby and myself to help us with the transition.
I told dcm I could wake them up a half hour earlier or lay them down a little bit earlier, but doing away with nap is not a possibility right now. She said we will just see how the night goes and talk about it tomorrow. Then she texted me a few minutes ago saying they will be late b/c it was such a rough night. Is it unprofessional of me to refuse to completely do away with nap time for a 2 & 3 year old? Are there actual regulations on that at all? I'm not licensed, so I don't really know what the "rules" are regarding nap. I honestly feel like if she insists on this I will have to term over it. I love these children very much, but they are very high maintenance and I have to make a lot of exceptions with them and I feel like this would put me over my ability to handle them.
If they won't go to bed as early as she tries then she needs to put off bedtime for an hour.
and by the way when do you get alone time if you give up your nap time from them? when will you clean, eat your lunch and prepare for afternoon activities?