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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>OT: Would You Take Your 3 Years Old To Your College Graduation?
jenny31052 08:43 PM 05-04-2013
So, I'm graduating in a month, and debating whether or not I want to take my 3 1/2 years old to the ceremony. I'm pulling strongly towards a "no way", but a couple of people, including my mother, are telling me to bring him,saying after all the work and sacrifices I did to get a degree while working, and raising a kid pretty much on my own (husband is military and was gone A LOT), he should be part of it.

I'm afraid that, other than not understanding why we're there, he will be so bored, and restless, that me and my husband won't fully enjoy this moment. I'm afraid my husband will be outside trying to keep him busy, while I walk up to get my diploma - my husband is also supposed to take pictures.... The ceremony will last about 2 hours, and I have to be there an hour before, so is going to be a long time for him to be there..

What would you do?
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SilverSabre25 08:53 PM 05-04-2013
If at all possible, I would definitely NOT take him. He will be so bored. Maybe you can have a friend watch him and bring him by after the graduation for pictures, or plan to do pictures off site somewhere. Bringing him won't be fair to you, to your husband, or more importantly, to him.
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jenny31052 08:56 PM 05-04-2013
Thanks,
that's what I think... I actually have a babysitter set up already (haven't told my mother yet, lol) , but I was battling within some guilty feelings...
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MarinaVanessa 08:57 PM 05-04-2013
I would talk to the family members that have told you to have him attend and suggest that they care for him while they attend the ceremony so that you can enjoy your graduation ceremony and your husband can enjoy your graduation too and take photos without having to worry about your DS being bored and having to walk him out.

If none agree to watch him then decide for yourself what you prefer to do without letting their opinions influence your decision. It's easy to say what other people should do if you don't have to be the one to put any effort into it KWIM.

Maybe get a sitter to bring along?
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Starburst 09:11 PM 05-04-2013
I would say no, because most young kids cannot sit still for too long and when they get bored they get fussy; which is distracting to not only you and your family but the other people who have worked hard and all of their families who have to hear it (they may be really upset if they cannot hear the name of the person they can to see).

Plus big graduations can get really loud, which can frighten or upset young children, and who ever has him will have to step out to sooth him may miss seeing you or he will just sit there being miserable for 2 hours (and making everyone else {family and strangers} miserable by distracting them from the event). So it's just as much for him as it is for you. You can always see if you can have a sitter meet you there for after.
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Sunshine74 10:23 PM 05-04-2013
Originally Posted by MarinaVanessa:
I would talk to the family members that have told you to have him attend and suggest that they care for him while they attend the ceremony so that you can enjoy your graduation ceremony and your husband can enjoy your graduation too and take photos without having to worry about your DS being bored and having to walk him out.

If none agree to watch him then decide for yourself what you prefer to do without letting their opinions influence your decision. It's easy to say what other people should do if you don't have to be the one to put any effort into it KWIM.

Maybe get a sitter to bring along?
I really like this idea of having the sitter or a family member watch him there and be available to walk him around if needed (especially during the long speeches) He could surprise you and do well. And he might get a kick out of watching you walk across the stage and cheering for you. But you know your child better then we do, and if you think he won't do well, don't bring him. I know 3 1/2 year olds who would do fine, and ones who wouldn't.
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Patches 02:52 AM 05-05-2013
My DS was about 3 1/2 at my college graduation ceremony and it was a mess! I won't go into the story but I ended up in tears at the end of the night (granted, I was a little emotional being 39 weeks pregnant ) and it really ruined the moment for me. I would definitely say leave him with a sitter or get a sitter to come along with you.....and congratulations
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Cradle2crayons 07:44 AM 05-05-2013
I agree with PP... If your mom is so insisting you bring him, then ask HER tombe responsible for him. I would want my child there but understand why they shouldn't go as well. I've never had anybody who watched my kids while I did anything so I guess I just got used to taking them along. But a graduation is different.

If mom says no, then ask the sitter. Maybe they would agree. If mom and sitter says no, then you have to decide what's better for everyone involved.
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Blackcat31 08:09 AM 05-05-2013
I would do as Silver suggested.

Congratulations on your graduation!!!!!
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jenny31052 08:17 AM 05-05-2013
Thanks for the replies... I will stick to my original plan and have the sitter coming to the house; she's a fun girl so I'm sure he will a better time hanging out with her...

My Mom and family would die to be able to be with our son during graduation, but they live overseas, so it's not an option for us it's just going to be me and my husband and a couple of close friends.

Thanks again!
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AfterSchoolMom 11:05 AM 05-05-2013
I did!


It depends on your child and their attention span, and how long the ceremony will be. At the very least, you could get some photos together with you in your cap and gown! My son is 12 now and really enjoys seeing them.

Congrats to you!!
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Play Care 04:51 AM 05-06-2013
When my mother graduated with her BA several years ago, I saw a lot of young children in the audience. A lot of the mom's had their kids names on their caps, which I thought was awesome. I saw one young child holding a sign for their mom, etc.

That said, the *only* way I would bring a young child is if I also had someone there to run interference - and it probably would NOT be a family member, as you know they would get annoyed if they wanted to watch and the child did not

Congrats!!!
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