I am unlicensed and babysit in my home. I only accept 3-4 children per day. Nothing big. Anyhow I have a five year old autistic boy and his two year old sister come part time. The five year old goes to a preschool program for two hours per day. Both children are still in diapers which isn't too bad but when the boy goes #2 it is very difficult to change. He hits me. My previous background in social work gives me the education to know what services are available in our area for this child. The mother wants the services but says she doesn't have time to get them in place. This boy attacks my children by choking them and hitting them. I explained to her that she would need to find somebody else because I am sorry about her situation but I cannot put other children at risk of being injured. She came here crying that life is so unfair and everything. It was a mess. I explained to her that if she would follow through with services he could have a behavior specialist that could work with the child and the adults in his life on how to properly care for him and teach discipline based upon his individual needs. See, up until now she made me think that I was causing this behavior and on this day admitted that this is an ongoing issue at school and at home. I told her that if she follows through with getting the appropriate services for her child I would be willing to go to meetings and learn how to properly care for her son. I was charging her 13 for the boy and 18 for the girl. I went to raise the rates across the board and gave two weeks notice that the rate will increase to 20 per day. Since the boy will he here all day 11 hours and the girl too. I felt that I earned this if going to meetings on my time, changing big boy diapers and getting beat up. She stated that she was not willing to pay this because I am not a preschool. This mother is a nurse practitioner and lives in rural America. She admitted that she can afford it but my care is not worth it because I do not have staff here and that if I hired someone she would pay me this amount. This is a person that puts me down that my house is smaller than hers. I have a 3 bedroom two bath cape cod on three acres and fenced in yard with play equipment. I only take 3 to 4 children. The boy has done damage to my home and the 2 yr old is obviously lost in the mess and is starving for attention. She is a very difficult child and her mother states that just because her child is more difficult she shouldn't have to hear about the problems I have with her. So, anyway I found out through the father that they decided not to try to get the behavior specialist. They would start the behavior specialist in the fall when school starts up again. I am back at square one. She told me that she can't find anyone to watch him because they will not accept a five yr old in diapers. I want to get rid of her because she again isn't following through. I am scared to take the child one more time. I have no clue if he is going to hurt me or the other children but with the proper guidance it could work. When he is here I have him with me at all times. I do not give him the opportunity to hurt another child. This also means that I give him all my attention and really can't accept other kids while he is here. Would I be awful if I didn't give her notice. I can't sleep at night in fear of what the next day will bring. I am a very sensitive person and I know as soon as I tell her she will go off on me and say bad things in this small town. I am afraid she will make me look like I am insensitive to his special needs. Could someone tell me what to say to her or how to handle this?

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