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Old 12-04-2010, 02:01 PM
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Default Refusal To Listen...WWYD?

We have a 3 yr old in our care who just refuses to listen to anything, no matter what it is lately. No matter if we're telling her what to do or what not to do. She'll be running around indoors along with some others. I remind them all, "walking feet". She continues running. I repeat, "walking feet", she ignores me. I physically stop her and tell her more firmly, "we can't run inside". She grins at me and continues to run... she often has "accidents" in her pants, so we remind everyone to go potty at certain times. She ignores us. So we'll directly tell her more firmly, "go potty". "No! I don't need to!" Two minutes later, she's wet her pants. At nap time, "Time to put our books down. It's nap time." 3 yr old, who may not even have a book at that moment, but the others do (and they lay them down as told), she gets up and grabs a book then. We'll tell her again that it's time to put it up, and she ignores us. Or just smiles, like she thinks we'll just laugh about it. But obviously I'm not laughing, nor have I ever when she doesn't listen. If she gets put in time-out for some reason, she'll jump up and grab a toy to play with as soon as our back is turned. We get after her and take it from her. She just grins again, in that defiant "I don't care what you say" look. Lately her listening has gotten so bad that I don't know what else to do but put her in a time out when she refuses to listen. But as soon as I talk to her about why she was placed there (because she wasn't listening), she gets up and just a minute later she's doing something that I ask her not to, or remind her of the rule. And she'll ignore me. We do the count down thing and everything (letting the children know that in 5 minutes it's time to wash hands or whatever. Then we tell them it's time for x). But 3 yr old doesn't pay any attention whatsoever. I don't know what else to do! I'm getting so frustrated with her refusal to listen, and I know nothing at home has changed, so there's nothing like that that could be causing her to ignore us more than usual. But seriously, she refuses to listen even when it's something she should like doing. Like "lets put our shoes on so we can go outside". Of course she doesn't. So everyone is ready to go out and she's still going around playing without shoes on. "why don't you have shoes on? We're all ready to go out." She grins, shrugs, and says, "I couldn't find them". I know she didn't even look because they're sometimes right in obvious sight. There is no way she couldn't have not been able to find them, if she'd just looked. Of course they aren't where they were supposed to be because she won't listen and put them back where they belong when she takes them off. I don't have time with all the other children and everything else to do to follow along behind this girl and make sure she does what she's supposed to, of course. And I know it's developmentally appropriate to expect certain things out of her, like putting her shoes on, because she used to. She knows how to do the stuff we ask of her. She just chooses not to. ideas anyone before I pull my hair out? Talking to parents doesn't change anything. Already tried.
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deaf child, won't listen, wwyd

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