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  #1  
Old 03-22-2011, 04:41 AM
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Default Parents Want To Decrease Nap Time

I have a 3yr old DCG who is here 6a-6pm Tues/Wed. I have had her since she was 4 months old. She has always been a great napper. She has always taken 2-3, even 4 hr naps. Even now at her age, she will sleep 3 hrs easily. Now her parents want me to wake her up after 1 hr. I have always been more of the believer that a child should wake up on there own, and if they are napping, they need the sleep. 12 hrs is a longgggggggggggg day, and the thought of having her up and about for 11 hrs of the 12, makes me nuts. So what should I do? Do I listen to the parents wishes and get her up after only an hr and deal with her crankiness the rest of the day, or do I just let her sleep and wake her maybe after 2 hrs? The parents dont have to deal with her, I do, and I feel for her, 1 hr is not enough.
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Old 03-22-2011, 04:48 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by legomom922 View Post
I have a 3yr old DCG who is here 6a-6pm Tues/Wed. I have had her since she was 4 months old. She has always been a great napper. She has always taken 2-3, even 4 hr naps. Even now at her age, she will sleep 3 hrs easily. Now her parents want me to wake her up after 1 hr. I have always been more of the believer that a child should wake up on there own, and if they are napping, they need the sleep. 12 hrs is a longgggggggggggg day, and the thought of having her up and about for 11 hrs of the 12, makes me nuts. So what should I do? Do I listen to the parents wishes and get her up after only an hr and deal with her crankiness the rest of the day, or do I just let her sleep and wake her maybe after 2 hrs? The parents dont have to deal with her, I do, and I feel for her, 1 hr is not enough.
Do you have something in your policy about how long nap time is? That should cover you. If the girl is there for 12 hours, you're right, that IS a long day. She should be napping for more than an hour. Especially since she can be a long napper. That could be a real shock for her. 2 hours is not unreasonable!
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Old 03-22-2011, 04:50 AM
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Tell them what they want to hear and go on with your day. If you are spending 12 hours a day with the child, you do know what is in the best interest of that child, even though you are not the actual parent. Plus, get 1 up, and they all end up awake. Your business your rules.
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Old 03-22-2011, 04:52 AM
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Sleep begets sleep. They probably want you to shorten her nap so that she'll sleep better at night. However, if you shorten her nap, she will probably sleep WORSE at night. Well-rested children rest well at night. I wouldn't shorten her nap, certainly not all the way down to one hour! At most, I would get her up after 2.5 hours or so.
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Old 03-22-2011, 04:54 AM
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WHY do they want to shorten the nap? My dcps could shorten their child's nap when their child is home with THEM. I cut naps off at 3 hours, but not before then. I wake them up after three hours mostly so I can change them, give them some time to wake up, have their afternoon snack and get ready to go home.
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Old 03-22-2011, 05:14 AM
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I would cut her back slowly...probably 2.5 hours, then 2 hours. If I were to cut one of my daycare boys back to 1 hour on the first try, I'd be guaranteed a kick in the jaw, LOL!!! Kidding....but he wouldn't be happy at all.
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Old 03-22-2011, 05:15 AM
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I don't provide services to children who don't need a full afternoon nap. That's 2.5 hours here and I set the time.

If they have outgrown nap they have outgrown my program.
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Old 03-22-2011, 05:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by mac60 View Post
Tell them what they want to hear and go on with your day. If you are spending 12 hours a day with the child, you do know what is in the best interest of that child, even though you are not the actual parent. Plus, get 1 up, and they all end up awake. Your business your rules.
ditto this !!
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Old 03-22-2011, 05:25 AM
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I would just agree with the parents and not say anything. You are looking for a battle with them. I will gaurentee they want her to go to bed early thats why they want her nap shortened. And I'm not sure with you all, but most of the kids don't fall asleep right away so how would you do that. Everyday she would be getting up at a different time. I set my nap from 1-3.30pm and I'm schedual and the kids always wake up happy and well rested. also, 12 hours is really long.
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Old 03-22-2011, 06:45 AM
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When I get a request like that I answer...that won't work for me. I refuse to spend a day with a cranky 3 year old, just so they can take him home and shove dinner in him and put him to bed. I also don't wake them up early for anyone. I don't think it is fair for the parents to set their own child up for misbehaving. Being tired leads to misbehaving. I would be up front and tell them she is tired and needs the rest.
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Old 03-22-2011, 09:41 AM
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just telling the parents what they want to hear is a bad idea IMO. they'll know the naps are long by what time their child goes to sleep at night. it's obvious. my MIL also believes "kids should sleep if they're tired and should wake up when they're ready" which would be awesome if she were the one dealing with them at bedtime. i've picked my son up before at 5 or 6pm to find him sleeping and she'd tell me, "he's only been asleep about 20 minutes" but when 10 or 11pm rolled around and he was still bright eyed and bushy tailed it was pretty obvious that was a flat out lie. i think you should either compromise with them (maybe 1.5 hour nap) or tell them NO and let them decide what they want to do.
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Old 03-22-2011, 09:54 AM
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I know a lot of you will not agree with this BUT, I have just told parents what they want to hear. If the child is tired and need sleep then they will sleep. If they aren't tired then they'll wake up.( I always leave books for the older ones to look at quietly if they wake earlier than their peers) Naps should be over by 3pm, kids will always be tired for bed. The problem isn't how long they are napping (as long as it's within the 1-3 time frame), its a consistent bedtime routine and not giving in to the 20 requests for a drink, another hug, another story.
I always find it funny when parents tell me how well "little johnny" is sleeping at night now that his naps are shorter. All a frame of mind thing. Sorry to all the moms, but if you expect a bad night, you will get one.
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Old 03-22-2011, 10:12 AM
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I had a similar request for a 2 yr old. They wanted to switch his 3 hr nap to 2 and schedule it at 10am bc that is when they lay him down during the day. I started out telling them that this wouldn't work with a group setting that all the kids need to be down all together and I needed my time for lunch and clean up time. It's important that I have my time for my self also...
We did try it out for a wk and it just wasn't working out so I posted on here about my dilemma...everyone gave me really good advise and encouragement to stick to my gut on this one. The following week I told DCM that that nap time wasn't working out on so many levels and that I don't mind giving him just a 2 hr nap but not at 10am...it messes to much with my schedule I have set down for the kids. DCM didn't quite know what to say but when DCD picked up he picked up way early and first thing that came out of his mouth was "Is he still sleeping"...as DCB runs a crossed to the gate to DCD smiling...I gave him a look that said "Of course he's a wake"...I wouldn't lie to them about nap time. But I am also not going to put his child down at 10am. The end of the week I had a talk with DCD about our signed agreement and a few other things and ever since then things have been pretty good.
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Old 03-22-2011, 10:16 AM
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this is what I have in my policy:

Crucial physical and mental development occurs in early childhood, and naps provide much-needed downtime for growth and rejuvenation. Naps also help keep kids from becoming overtired, which not only takes a toll on their moods but may also make it harder for them to fall asleep at night. Not to mention that it is a major requirement for good health
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Old 03-22-2011, 10:20 AM
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I am in the minority here.
I have limited nap times for some kids. There are some kids that I know spend time with their parents after dinner, they don't just shove them in bed at 7. If that's the case, and they still have trouble getting them to sleep at a reasonable hour, I will limit a nap.
I have kiddos that can sleep for 3 to 31/2 hours, and I'm sure that can keep them up at night. If that is the case, I will just have them be the last to lay down, let them read books quietly for a while, and wake them up after they have slept for at least an hour. If they don't want to wake up though, they can still sleep. I would never force a child to stay awake or to wake up. If it doesn't work our for me and the child, I would tell the parents I gave it a try and it didn't work.
I think it's reasonable for them to ask for naps to be limitedto a couple hours only , especially is she sleeps for 3 or even 4 hours.
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Old 03-22-2011, 10:24 AM
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I have this in mine:

Please keep in mind that the children have a very busy and active day here so they may require more sleep than you’re used to at home on the weekends. Children under 5 require an average of 12-13 hours of sleep for each 24 hour period. I am a firm believer in children getting enough sleep on a daily basis since sleep deprivation in children manifests as hyperactivity, restlessness, trouble settling and a general lack of control with their emotions.
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Old 03-22-2011, 10:26 AM
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I have this in mine:

Please keep in mind that the children have a very busy and active day here so they may require more sleep than you’re used to at home on the weekends. Children under 5 require an average of 12-13 hours of sleep for each 24 hour period. I am a firm believer in children getting enough sleep on a daily basis since sleep deprivation in children manifests as hyperactivity, restlessness, trouble settling and a general lack of control with their emotions.
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Old 03-22-2011, 10:33 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Meyou View Post
I have this in mine:

Please keep in mind that the children have a very busy and active day here so they may require more sleep than you’re used to at home on the weekends. Children under 5 require an average of 12-13 hours of sleep for each 24 hour period. I am a firm believer in children getting enough sleep on a daily basis since sleep deprivation in children manifests as hyperactivity, restlessness, trouble settling and a general lack of control with their emotions.
I love this...can I steal it....lol
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Old 03-22-2011, 10:38 AM
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i would talk with the parents. if you really feel she needs more sleep at your house, maybe that's what you should do. maybe she could start out reading or coloring and then transition into a nap part way through nap time. this way the others will sleep and she will wake on the latter end of the day with better energy to get through the rest. I would't lie about how long she's napping...trust me the parent's WILL know then your relationship will suffer--and that's not a good mix.If they won't work with you on it then it might not be a good fit anymore. there are centers and some home daycares that have open policies for naps ( not many homes, but some) that might work better for them.
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Old 03-22-2011, 10:55 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Zoe View Post
Do you have something in your policy about how long nap time is? That should cover you. If the girl is there for 12 hours, you're right, that IS a long day. She should be napping for more than an hour. Especially since she can be a long napper. That could be a real shock for her. 2 hours is not unreasonable!
I have nothing in my policies about naps...

Also, she is the only one I have left, because I am getting out of the business. When she leaves, that will be it, I'm done. So her naps wouldn't disrupt anyone else.

I have been dianosed with Insomnia, and S.A.D, and have been dealing with a slipped disc in my back since 2007, and had surgery for a heal spur in April 2010 that I am still having complications with, so I am just not up to the challenages of childcare right now. I have no strength, no energy and am sooo tired all the time, so to me the thought of having her up 11 hrs just makes me cringe. I need my rest too. I have had her since she was 4 months old, so I probably know her better than her parents do, whom are divorced anyway, so she is getting different schedules depending on where she goes. She goes to another DCP on M, TH & Fri, so I have no idea how she is doing with her schedule either.

I dont mean to be selfish, but I am leaning towards the "dont tell the parents and just do what I want" plan. She is only here 2 days a wk anyway, and if they are not going to worry about me dealing with a cranky 3 yr old, why should I worry about them?

To make it worse, the Mom stays wherever..she does not have a home since she moved out of her husbands house a yr ago. They sleep at whomevers house will take them in for the night, and the mom only wants to be left alone without having to take care of DCG anyway. The Dad is a workaholic, and works 70 hrs a wk, and though I would say he is the most stable person she has in her life, I'm sure he is tired at night too. DCG is dealing with enough disruptions in my opinion, and I feel with her life circumstances, she needs this rest.
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