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Ariana 10:07 AM 02-25-2016
You will never regret handling yourself with dignity and class 
KidGrind 02:33 PM 02-25-2016
Originally Posted by spedmommy4:
I think a few more things need to be taken into consideration here:
In rereading the post, the dcm didn't say Tasha's name, the little one did. Tasha and the other provider were only able to figure it out because they knew each other and the little boy said Tasha's name.
Yes, it's infuriating that dcm is talking trash but, if dcm isn't using Tasha's name directly, there wouldn't be anything Tasha could legally do. And, if Tasha writes a letter to dcm, it could make dcm mad enough to escalate the situation to Yelp reviews. Just my two cents but, in your shoes, I would leave it alone . . .
Thank you for writing this, I misread!!! I thought the mother mentioned the provider’s name not the child.I think a few more things need to be taken into consideration here:
In rereading the post, the dcm didn't say Tasha's name, the little one did. Tasha and the other provider were only able to figure it out because they knew each other and the little boy said Tasha's name.
Yes, it's infuriating that dcm is talking trash but, if dcm isn't using Tasha's name directly, there wouldn't be anything Tasha could legally do. And, if Tasha writes a letter to dcm, it could make dcm mad enough to escalate the situation to Yelp reviews. Just my two cents but, in your shoes, I would leave it alone . . .
If the mother didn’t say your name, I wouldn’t reach out to her. Let her tell her tall tales, most providers will know there is a different side to that story.
Tasha 06:48 PM 02-25-2016
And I feel a lot better. DCM called her to ask if/when they could start and my friend turned her down. She flat-out told her that I was a friend of hers, and that she knew she was lying. She also told her, "I'm going to give you a piece of advice,'' that it was going to be hard to find a provider if she continues to trash her previous one, that it sends up a big red flag.
I am very grateful to my friend. She said she wasn't going to take her anyway because the hours weren't a good fit, but I still appreciate the way she handled it.
She also told me exactly how my name came up during the interview. She asked DCM why she was leaving her provider, and DCM started saying ''she'' and the DCB said, ''I go to Miss Tasha.'' And DCM said, yes honey, you used to go there.
I am very grateful to my friend. She said she wasn't going to take her anyway because the hours weren't a good fit, but I still appreciate the way she handled it.
She also told me exactly how my name came up during the interview. She asked DCM why she was leaving her provider, and DCM started saying ''she'' and the DCB said, ''I go to Miss Tasha.'' And DCM said, yes honey, you used to go there.
Nurse Jackie 09:10 PM 02-25-2016
I'm sorry you had to go through this. While reading this thread I thought I was watching a soap opera. In the end I'm glad things turned out in your favor. I bet she's emailing someone right now talking about how she knows you really have a smug look on your face now. Hopefully she sends this email to the right recipient 
Josiegirl 02:16 AM 02-26-2016
Originally Posted by Ariana:
You will never regret handling yourself with dignity and class
I love that! So many times I wish I had used that. You will never regret handling yourself with dignity and class
Josiegirl 02:21 AM 02-26-2016
Oh Tasha, I am SO glad your friend said that to her!!! She needs to receive a gift of chocolate!
I was completely on the fence of how I would handle something like that. I would have wanted to give dcm a piece of my mind and thought your original letter was exactly what I'd want to do but knew being the bigger person was probably the route to go. I'm really glad it worked out the way it did for you! Did your friend tell you what dcm's reaction was? Oh to be the fly on the wall....
I was completely on the fence of how I would handle something like that. I would have wanted to give dcm a piece of my mind and thought your original letter was exactly what I'd want to do but knew being the bigger person was probably the route to go. I'm really glad it worked out the way it did for you! Did your friend tell you what dcm's reaction was? Oh to be the fly on the wall....
lovemykidstoo 04:54 AM 02-26-2016
Originally Posted by Tasha:
And I feel a lot better. DCM called her to ask if/when they could start and my friend turned her down. She flat-out told her that I was a friend of hers, and that she knew she was lying. She also told her, "I'm going to give you a piece of advice,'' that it was going to be hard to find a provider if she continues to trash her previous one, that it sends up a big red flag.
I am very grateful to my friend. She said she wasn't going to take her anyway because the hours weren't a good fit, but I still appreciate the way she handled it.
She also told me exactly how my name came up during the interview. She asked DCM why she was leaving her provider, and DCM started saying ''she'' and the DCB said, ''I go to Miss Tasha.'' And DCM said, yes honey, you used to go there.
That is perfect. What did she say I wonder?And I feel a lot better. DCM called her to ask if/when they could start and my friend turned her down. She flat-out told her that I was a friend of hers, and that she knew she was lying. She also told her, "I'm going to give you a piece of advice,'' that it was going to be hard to find a provider if she continues to trash her previous one, that it sends up a big red flag.
I am very grateful to my friend. She said she wasn't going to take her anyway because the hours weren't a good fit, but I still appreciate the way she handled it.
She also told me exactly how my name came up during the interview. She asked DCM why she was leaving her provider, and DCM started saying ''she'' and the DCB said, ''I go to Miss Tasha.'' And DCM said, yes honey, you used to go there.
Thriftylady 05:04 AM 02-26-2016
I am so glad your friend handled this in this way! I agree send her some chocolates or flowers or something for not being afraid to speak the truth!
Rockgirl 06:19 AM 02-26-2016
That is a good friend you have!
spedmommy4 06:23 AM 02-26-2016
Honestly, I think that dcm needed to hear that from another person. And I am betting the experience dcm just had with your provider friend was both eye opening (in terms of how small the childcare community is) and humbling. She will either take it to heart and learn from her mistakes at this point or she is going to continue have a hard time finding home based childcare.
Tasha 09:39 AM 02-26-2016
Originally Posted by Josiegirl:
Oh Tasha, I am SO glad your friend said that to her!!! She needs to receive a gift of chocolate!
I was completely on the fence of how I would handle something like that. I would have wanted to give dcm a piece of my mind and thought your original letter was exactly what I'd want to do but knew being the bigger person was probably the route to go. I'm really glad it worked out the way it did for you! Did your friend tell you what dcm's reaction was? Oh to be the fly on the wall....
She didn't really react, my friend said. After she gave her the ''advice,'' she just said a curt ''thank you'' and hung up.Oh Tasha, I am SO glad your friend said that to her!!! She needs to receive a gift of chocolate!
I was completely on the fence of how I would handle something like that. I would have wanted to give dcm a piece of my mind and thought your original letter was exactly what I'd want to do but knew being the bigger person was probably the route to go. I'm really glad it worked out the way it did for you! Did your friend tell you what dcm's reaction was? Oh to be the fly on the wall....
She didn't deny lying. I really do owe her something nice. We're not even close but she really did me a favor. I don't think she even realizes how big a favor it was.
sleepinghart 06:21 AM 03-05-2016
Originally Posted by Tasha:
I'm sorry, didn't mean to just drop off the map ...
A scratch on my daughter's leg turned into a deep infection, and that has consumed me for the last day or so. But now she's doing a lot better, thank goodness.
So back to the topic at hand. Yes, I did hear from DCD again. After I told him I wouldn't be able to meet with him, he wrote me back that he understood but wants me to please reconsider taking them back. He said that his house is basically in an uproar because his son doesn't understand why he can't come back to my house and play with his friends, and that his wife knows that she really screwed up, and feels terrible. And that she's under a lot of stress at work (I know the feeling) and that she really doesn't think I'm a bitch (ha).
It was such a nice note that it made me want to cry. I feel pretty emotional right now because I'm so tired so I definitely won't be responding until I can collect my thoughts. If I do at all. I feel bad because you guys have all be so nice telling me that I've been so professional, and here I am wavering!
I just don't know how it would work to take them back.
MV, I know exactly what you mean. I need a nap too. One that lasts about 12 hours!
I'm sorry, didn't mean to just drop off the map ...
A scratch on my daughter's leg turned into a deep infection, and that has consumed me for the last day or so. But now she's doing a lot better, thank goodness.
So back to the topic at hand. Yes, I did hear from DCD again. After I told him I wouldn't be able to meet with him, he wrote me back that he understood but wants me to please reconsider taking them back. He said that his house is basically in an uproar because his son doesn't understand why he can't come back to my house and play with his friends, and that his wife knows that she really screwed up, and feels terrible. And that she's under a lot of stress at work (I know the feeling) and that she really doesn't think I'm a bitch (ha).
It was such a nice note that it made me want to cry. I feel pretty emotional right now because I'm so tired so I definitely won't be responding until I can collect my thoughts. If I do at all. I feel bad because you guys have all be so nice telling me that I've been so professional, and here I am wavering!
I just don't know how it would work to take them back.
MV, I know exactly what you mean. I need a nap too. One that lasts about 12 hours!
I wouldn't say anything to DCM...my thing would be really wanting her to know that I knew what she said to your provider friend about you though. Did you ever respond to DCD's email you referenced above? If not, I would respond to this-
"and that his wife knows that she really screwed up, and feels terrible..."
..with something that says that she apparently has not learned a lesson nor does she apparently feel bad about it as she has been bad-mouthing you as well as telling lies about you once again. I would be very polite in the email and just say it very matter-of-factly...as professionally as possible(..you're just making sure he understands your decision not to take DCB back and exactly why you cannot)
. Telling Dad that you know is as good as telling DCM that you know. ...Best wishes
!