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  #1  
Old 08-27-2012, 11:16 AM
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Default Napping A 2.5 Year Old...She Should Still Nap At Day Care, RIGHT?!

I am sure that there was a thread about this before but I don`t like hijacking. ;-)

I'm having some issues with my 2.5 year old DCG. She's my full-timer. She's very high energy and she's here from 7am to almost 6pm.

She's wearing me out. she's just constant stomping around, go-go-go. I mean, she's a great kid, but I am not allowed to nap her.

My issue with this is that she very obviously needs a nap. If I tell her it's quiet time, she lays down and is always the first one to fall asleep. She then sleeps longer than any of the other kids, and I have to physically wake her up. Whether I only let her sleep 30 minutes or 2 hours, the result is the same, she doesn't go to bed for her parents until anywhere between 9pm and midnight.

I don't know what to do. She gets very rascally as the day goes on if she doesn't nap. there have been times on days when I don't nap her that she just passes out. The other day at around 3pm she fell asleep in the middle of climbing up onthe couch. Seriously. Mid crawl. One leg touching the floor supporting herself. Then another day she fell asleep on the floor while playing with blocks. Both times where she passed out asleep was during the other kids' nap time. I have to nap them in different rooms away from the living room, which is the play area, because she's just too loud when she's awake.
My daughter is the oldest child, just turned 3, then this DCG is 2.5, and the other kids are between 14 months and 23 months.

Any suggestions? Her parents have been up and down with me on this and went from, "she needs something of a nap, please wake her up after 30 minutes" to "Don't let her nap at all anymore, we don't get any sleep". it's ridiculous. Suggestions?
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Old 08-27-2012, 11:55 AM
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too bad.
I require nap. if you arent in kindergarten you sleep here, its in my policies. if someome brought a kid like that I wouldnt do it, but thats just me. I would send them away. as it is I work over ten hours a day, during nap I clean at least one hour and then relax at least onw hour.
if your intent on keeping her maybe she can have an afternoon movie?
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Old 08-27-2012, 11:58 AM
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put her on a schedule that works for you. if that doesnt work for the parents, then they need to find a new daycare, period.

I believe 95% of us, if not more, do not offer "no nap" care unless a child is school age.

I would never keep a kid that many hours personally, and certainly never provide childcare with no daily nap
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:08 PM
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why can't you nap her? Sister.....let me tell you something....lol

if your policy is that all kids nap, then that is what this child needs to do..

I know there are some kids (like my own) who will stop napping at even this early of an age. BUT if she is falling asleep, then she needs a nap.

If you are consistent and the parents are also, this child will learn to follow the routine and nap for you daily. I would not be waking a child after 30 min of sleep. (right after they just fell into deep sleep) wheee we...No way...

What is your policy on napping??
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:09 PM
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Toddlers

From ages 1 to 3, most toddlers sleep about 10 to 13 hours. Separation anxiety, or just the desire to be up with mom and dad (and not miss anything), can motivate a child to stay awake. So can simple toddler-style contrariness.

Parents sometimes make the mistake of thinking that keeping a child up will make him or her sleepier for bedtime. In fact, though, kids can have a harder time sleeping if they're overtired. Set regular bedtimes and naptimes. Though most toddlers take naps during the day, you don't have to force your child to nap. But it's important to schedule some quiet time, even if your child chooses not to sleep.

Establishing a bedtime routine helps kids relax and get ready for sleep. For a toddler, the routine may be from 15 to 30 minutes long and include calming activities such as reading a story, bathing, and listening to soft music.

Whatever the nightly ritual is, your toddler will probably insist that it be the same every night. Just don't allow rituals to become too long or too complicated. Whenever possible, allow your toddler to make bedtime choices within the routine: which pajamas to wear, which stuffed animal to take to bed, what music to play. This gives your little one a sense of control over the routine.


http://kidshealth.org/parent/general/sleep/sleep.html#


I am thinking that she either has a poor bedtime routine, (or poorly enforced) AND/or she is overtired. I had this happen with one dcb and finally had to explain to Mom that there is NO WAY to safetly put all of the other kids down in one room (and read to them all) and leave dcb in the other room with the SA non nappers. I told her that I would take dcb in the napping room with me, and he would get the benefit of listening to the story, and then IF he fell asleep, he would be staying asleep. A kid who isn't tired/doesn't need a nap just WONT NAP. Plain and simple. My ds is 4 and doesn't need a nap, he goes into the napping room, cuddles with a blanket and a pillow on a mat, listens to a few stories and never falls asleep. He then comes out of the nap room with me to play quietly with the SA kids.

If she is there at 7, the latest she is getting up in the morning is at 6:30. If she is awake from 6:30-6:30pm with NO NAP she is way overtired. They need to set a bedtime and stick with it (even on weekends) There is noooo way sleeping from 12-6:30 is good for any kid.
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:10 PM
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Oh I see so you have her for 11 hrs a day with no nap. Then parents take her home and can put her to bed without any time with them. I wouldn't want to go home and go to bed either if I never saw my mom and dad. Just to get up and have to go back there again in the morning. What ever that is a parenting problem and if they don't like your schedule it sounds like they might need another provider.
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:10 PM
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Originally Posted by cheerfuldom View Post
put her on a schedule that works for you. if that doesnt work for the parents, then they need to find a new daycare, period.

I believe 95% of us, if not more, do not offer "no nap" care unless a child is school age.

I would never keep a kid that many hours personally, and certainly never provide childcare with no daily nap

Agree 100%

This part especially. To me that's borders on, if not is, unethical. I get that everyone needs to make a living but for criminey's sake, at least one of them could find another job or different hours so they could stagger the amount of time she's away from them both.

That goes beyond doing daycare, you're raising the child near on your own at that point. What a shame....



Being away from mom and dad that many hours a day it's no wonder she refuses to go to sleep....she'd never see them otherwise!
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:10 PM
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So I would be asking Mom to get on board with you and try a regular nap routine at your house and a regular bedtime routine at home for two weeks. No deviations. I would bet it vastly improves dcg's sleep and behavior!
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:16 PM
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First of all the child obviously NEEDS a nap. You need to have a talk with the parents about this. I hate the when parents say their child won't do something and I see it more and more. They need to set a bedtime routline with her and MAKE her lay down. When/if she gets out of bed they should (without any words) pick her up and put her back in bed (rinse and repeat) and it should only go for a week at the most ( in my experience more like 1 night) and she will stay in bed and sleep. It just irks me "little Johny wouldn't come to daycare unless I gave him a cookie" ummm...you're bigger than him, pick him up and put him in his carseat. I can't believe these parents don't want her to take a nap, if she falls asleep during play she must be a hellion come 6 pm when you don't let her sleep. When did we go from a society where children listen to adults to adults who listen to children?
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:25 PM
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Either let her nap, but tell the parents she didn't nap, (they will miraculously be able to get her to sleep) Or tell the parents "She's taking a nap, because I can't handle her moods anymore".

Plus, honestly, it's just cruel to keep a child up from nap just to convenience the adults in her life. They should just get her up earlier in the morning so she's not so wound up.
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:32 PM
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I totally agree with you all, 100%. Really though, they are not the sort of people to do hands-off child rearing. they have no bedtime routine, they have admitted to me that at bedtime they put her in the car and drive around with her until she falls asleep. I mean *come on*.

If she doesn't nap here, she usually falls asleep by 6:30pm.

the parents have told me that it's "okay to nap her, just make sure to do it before lunch time". If she sleeps before lunch, she has permission to sleep however long she wants, be it 30 minutes or 3 hours. After lunch, it's a whole different ball game. BUt the thing is, I am NOT having two separate nap times. Until recently, my son was napping twice a day completely opposite of the other kids, I finally got him on the same name schedule. I am not doing two nap times again.

I feel like I've been up and down with this family. They don't get the separation anxiety thing because she appears to be very well adjusted and "loves coming here".
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:42 PM
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Yeah, when she started coming here and her parents said she didn't nap, I said it was my rule that all kids at least lay down quietly and read books for 20 minutes. If they fall asleep in those 20 minutes, then they needed a nap.

They were fine with that, but as it turned out, she was konking out within 2 minutes, not 20. She even fell asleep before my own daughter, 6 months older than her, who still naps 2 hours every day and is asleep by 8-9pm. I told them this and they were shocked, because she doesn''t nap at home on the weekends and sure, she is a nightmare right around midday, they said, but it only takes 30 minutes of driving to get her to sleep rather than 2 hours!

I have tried napping her and on those days I don't even mention that she napped. They know the difference. They always report the next morning that she didn't go to sleep unti lmidnight, or that she was up all night with nigh terrors, or whatever. I mean, I feel bad that they can't get her to sleep but I agree with you all, nearly 11 hours here with no nap at 2.5 is pretty outrageous...especially since my 3 year old still naps.

I have tried making the living room a calm, quiet place for her on the days where I say, "okay kid, you're not getting a nap". I pull the curtains and make it dark, I put on tv so she can just quietly watch, but she is SOOOO squirrely that I am constantly reminding her that she's being too noisy. She's loud no matter what QUIET activity we do. ARGH.
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Old 08-27-2012, 12:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom View Post
put her on a schedule that works for you. if that doesnt work for the parents, then they need to find a new daycare, period.

I believe 95% of us, if not more, do not offer "no nap" care unless a child is school age.

I would never keep a kid that many hours personally, and certainly never provide childcare with no daily nap
I agree with Cheer too!

You need to do what works for your child care program. You will NEVER please everyone with special requests and such so simply nap her when your nap time is and let the parents deal with the rest of her time.

What in the world do her parents do that she is with you for so long?
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Old 08-27-2012, 01:17 PM
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Yeah, when she started coming here and her parents said she didn't nap, I said it was my rule that all kids at least lay down quietly and read books for 20 minutes. If they fall asleep in those 20 minutes, then they needed a nap.

They were fine with that, but as it turned out, she was konking out within 2 minutes, not 20. She even fell asleep before my own daughter, 6 months older than her, who still naps 2 hours every day and is asleep by 8-9pm. I told them this and they were shocked, because she doesn''t nap at home on the weekends and sure, she is a nightmare right around midday, they said, but it only takes 30 minutes of driving to get her to sleep rather than 2 hours!

I have tried napping her and on those days I don't even mention that she napped. They know the difference. They always report the next morning that she didn't go to sleep unti lmidnight, or that she was up all night with nigh terrors, or whatever. I mean, I feel bad that they can't get her to sleep but I agree with you all, nearly 11 hours here with no nap at 2.5 is pretty outrageous...especially since my 3 year old still naps.

I have tried making the living room a calm, quiet place for her on the days where I say, "okay kid, you're not getting a nap". I pull the curtains and make it dark, I put on tv so she can just quietly watch, but she is SOOOO squirrely that I am constantly reminding her that she's being too noisy. She's loud no matter what QUIET activity we do. ARGH.
Do not base your decision off what the parents are telling you she is doing at home.....mainly because you cannot also be reacting to whatever current complaint they have about what she did the night before. Keep her on your routine each and every day. If her nights get more consistent, great and if not, thats not your problem. The parents have multiple issues going on at home, the biggest being that they admittedly have no bedtime routine. You cant fix everything but you can change what is happening at your house. Do not offer TV to an overstimulated and exhausted child....thats the worse thing you can do IMO. stop trying to "keep her quiet" during nap time and just put her down for a nap. PNP in a room by herself, darkened as much as possible, white noise or calming music, close the door and let her calm herself and go to sleep, period. I wouldnt worry about what the parents say later. Unless you are wiling to do this current craziness each and every day till kindergarten, you need to get a plan and change things now. Dont react to whatever her morning is like....naps are the same time, the same way, the same length every day no matter what.
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Old 08-27-2012, 01:21 PM
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Originally Posted by cheerfuldom View Post
Do not base your decision off what the parents are telling you she is doing at home.....mainly because you cannot also be reacting to whatever current complaint they have about what she did the night before. Keep her on your routine each and every day. If her nights get more consistent, great and if not, thats not your problem. The parents have multiple issues going on at home, the biggest being that they admittedly have no bedtime routine. You cant fix everything but you can change what is happening at your house. Do not offer TV to an overstimulated and exhausted child....thats the worse thing you can do IMO. stop trying to "keep her quiet" during nap time and just put her down for a nap. PNP in a room by herself, darkened as much as possible, white noise or calming music, close the door and let her calm herself and go to sleep, period. I wouldnt worry about what the parents say later. Unless you are wiling to do this current craziness each and every day till kindergarten, you need to get a plan and change things now. Dont react to whatever her morning is like....naps are the same time, the same way, the same length every day no matter what.
totally agree! I had a mom who complained about naps interfering with night time. she was full of poop!! Her DD never went to bed until 9-10pm whether she napped here or not. The problem was the routine at home. Frequently the mom would take the kids to the park at 8pm. A 2 yr old at a park at 8pm is not normal nor is it conducive to sleep.

You need to tell her that these are the rules, like it or lump it. This is what I did! In the end the kid got the sleep she needed, just not at home.
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Old 08-27-2012, 01:23 PM
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Quote:
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They were fine with that, but as it turned out, she was konking out within 2 minutes, not 20. She even fell asleep before my own daughter, 6 months older than her, who still naps 2 hours every day and is asleep by 8-9pm. I told them this and they were shocked, because she doesn''t nap at home on the weekends and sure, she is a nightmare right around midday, they said, but it only takes 30 minutes of driving to get her to sleep rather than 2 hours!
Here is where I believe the TRUE problem is. At the age of 2.5 yrs old, she still does not know how to self sooth and calm her body down at night! Her parents have trained her to fall asleep in the car, and from what they've told you, they do it EVERY night to get her to fall asleep. The problem is NOT whether she has napped or not, the problem is that she won't fall asleep at night unless she's in a car, in motion!!

The reason she falls asleep sooner on no-nap days is because she is UTTERLY exhausted and she hasn't developed the skills to calm her body down and fall asleep by herself at night. Once they buckle down and teach her how to fall asleep by herself and self soothe, their sleep issues at home will go away- nap or not.
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Old 08-27-2012, 01:25 PM
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i think that we have all been in your shoes when we first started doing daycare...just wanting to please the parents..... Like everyone is saying you have to do what works for you at your house.

I used to have a mom that came every morning to tell me that her kid would not go to sleep until midnight???? They asked me to stop napping and to please the parents I did. The child was so far behind all of the other kids, becuase he was so tired all of the time. I eventually got tired of trying to please the family and turned to education to teach them that their 2.5 year old needed a nap. maslow's hierarchy of needs ring a bell....

its the first one on the pyramid....... you start from the bottom up, meaning the foundation..... Print this out for them and show it to them... Sometimes this works with families that if they see it from an educated stand point they will listen...Not saying that you are uneducated by any means, I am saying that if you show them proof.....I attched some links below hope you can open them...


http://www.google.com/imgres?imgurl=...9QEwBA&dur=101


http://www.business2community.com/bl...-sites-0257200
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Old 08-27-2012, 01:28 PM
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I have had these parents and as much as I hate to do it I tell them either child naps or you find a daycare where they don't require it. They will usually deal with it for a bit and then pull at about 3 years old to send them to "a real preschool". I do not think the centers do anything to keep the child awake either but I don't get into that with them. They will figure that out when they get there.
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Old 08-27-2012, 01:56 PM
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so what do they do on the weekends. find out their routine on the weekend. I agree with the other posters, nap this child. If she is coming to you at 7am what time is she getting up at. I also have a feeling that she has no face time with her parents so she is excited to be with them when they pick her up. I couldn't keep her that long.
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Old 08-27-2012, 02:01 PM
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so what do they do on the weekends. find out their routine on the weekend. I agree with the other posters, nap this child. If she is coming to you at 7am what time is she getting up at. I also have a feeling that she has no face time with her parents so she is excited to be with them when they pick her up. I couldn't keep her that long.
this is exactly what the other family was like too...ZERO face time..it was sad, but it was what it was. We can't change the parent, even though I know we wish we could.

the kid was with me all day long 11 hours and the parents didnt want to have to deal with anything at all. They just wanted to come home from work and put the kid to bed. Some people don't realize how much work being a parent is. Notice I said SOME...

nap nap nap....lol
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Old 08-27-2012, 02:12 PM
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My daycare, and if a parent tells me no nap, they would not stay long here.
This reminds me of one of my moms told me just 2 weeks ago- Honestly it's ok if you do not lay her down at all, all day long, it is perfectly fine with us!!! Are you kidding me??? This little girls is 9 months old!!!! She doesn't like to be laid down!! THe parents hold her while she is sleeping or co-sleep with her.
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Old 08-27-2012, 03:36 PM
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The center where I work now has nap for 2 1/2 hours for toddlers (18 mos. to 3 years). It is right on our schedule in the parents manual that has to be signed when they enroll. Everyone usually falls asleep in that first half hour. If they wake early and there are still some sleepers, I let them look at books on thier cots but they still need to stay quiet because they all nap in the same room.

I really need them to nap (or at least rest quietly)...that is the only time I have when I can plan our activities for future days. I am hourly so I am trying not to do too much planning outside of work hours....doesn't always work out for me, but I am trying to get to that point where it gets done while I am at work.
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Old 08-27-2012, 04:45 PM
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I say, very matter of factly TELL the parents that their child will lay down and nap when the other children nap or they will need to make other child care arrangements.

Personally, I allow no napping, BUT ONLY if the child CLEARLY does not NEED one and ONLY at MY discretion. The parents have no input into my daily schedule with the children. If they want that, then they will need to find another caregiver.
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Old 08-27-2012, 05:35 PM
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Kids actually sleep better at night when they are not overly tired. My policy is all kids nap! I put them down early, by 12, and wake them by 3. I have several kids that I have 12 hours a day. If they are here before 7 I try to get them to sleep a little longer in the mornings too
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Old 08-27-2012, 05:38 PM
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Kids actually sleep better at night when they are not overly tired. My policy is all kids nap! I put them down early, by 12, and wake them by 3. I have several kids that I have 12 hours a day. If they are here before 7 I try to get them to sleep a little longer in the mornings too
soooooo true....sleep begets sleep...
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Old 08-27-2012, 06:48 PM
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I agree with everyone here. I have had parents say the same thing, but I always reply that ALL the children lay down at the same time and that I don't "make" them sleep, but they do need to rest. If they fall asleep, then they need it. I don't think it's that unusual to have a child for 10 -11 hrs a day. Most of my kids come at 7:30 and are here until 5:30. You figure that they drop them off and have to commute and be at work from 8-5. What I never understand when I've had this happen is if you pick up your child at 5:30 or in your case 6:00, by the time they get home it's 6:00/6:30, they have dinner, bath, etc, do they not want any time with the child? They want to be home and do all of that and have them in bed by 8:00? If they are driving their DD around at midnight to get her to sleep, they need to reevaluate their parenting. That is ridiculous. They have no control over her.
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Old 08-27-2012, 07:52 PM
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the parents have told me that it's "okay to nap her, just make sure to do it before lunch time". If she sleeps before lunch, she has permission to sleep however long she wants, be it 30 minutes or 3 hours.
Well that's simple then - feed her lunch at 3:00 p.m. .

Oh, and I agree with everyone else - she naps or they find new care.
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Old 08-27-2012, 07:57 PM
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soooooo true....sleep begets sleep...
I agree with this and the part about them not teaching their child to go to sleep without doing it in the car. They started that routine so they are stuck with it.

I even have it in my policies that I will not wake a child at certain intervals to "help with evening routines". That got put on paper after a mom said she allowed her almost 3 yr old to stay up until 11 and then nursed her to sleep. "She wouldn't go to bed any earlier." I let her sleep as long as she wanted (usually a traditional 2 2.5 hour nap time) and I skirted the issue with mom.

If they don't allow their kids to nap here, they are in the wrong place.
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Old 08-27-2012, 08:12 PM
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Originally Posted by Crystal View Post
I say, very matter of factly TELL the parents that their child will lay down and nap when the other children nap or they will need to make other child care arrangements.

Personally, I allow no napping, BUT ONLY if the child CLEARLY does not NEED one and ONLY at MY discretion. The parents have no input into my daily schedule with the children. If they want that, then they will need to find another caregiver.
thats how I run it here too, Its up to my discretion whether or not a child needs a nap. I'm not going to keep a child up because the parents want them to go to bed early, what about me, when would I get a break, eat my lunch (in peace)
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Old 08-28-2012, 05:39 AM
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Originally Posted by nanglgrl View Post
First of all the child obviously NEEDS a nap. You need to have a talk with the parents about this. I hate the when parents say their child won't do something and I see it more and more. They need to set a bedtime routline with her and MAKE her lay down. When/if she gets out of bed they should (without any words) pick her up and put her back in bed (rinse and repeat) and it should only go for a week at the most ( in my experience more like 1 night) and she will stay in bed and sleep. It just irks me "little Johny wouldn't come to daycare unless I gave him a cookie" ummm...you're bigger than him, pick him up and put him in his carseat. I can't believe these parents don't want her to take a nap, if she falls asleep during play she must be a hellion come 6 pm when you don't let her sleep. When did we go from a society where children listen to adults to adults who listen to children?
I hear this so much. She won't lay down, she won't sleep, she won't eat...etc. Who is in charge here, you or your 3 year old??
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Old 08-28-2012, 08:00 AM
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I wonder if this would work:

If she naps at like, 9am for 2-3 hours, she is still okay to go to bed at around 8pm. Pretty reasonable, and they don' have to drive her around at that point, either.

So I'm wondering if it might be worthwhile to start out napping her at that time of morning, and slowly, slowly, moving it to my regular nap time? Honestly, I don't want to lose this girl over naps. A child or parent would have to do something pretty drastic to be termed by me. I live in a small community and I am very lucky to have the business I have. It took me a long time to find this full time family that has a child that fits in well with everything (mostly) here. I've had kids that have done nothing but kick and scream, bite and slap, cry and pout, so if this is the worst of it, I will not consider terming. But she so obviously needs a nap it's not funny. I can tel when she's tired, every time I have to tell her no, it doesn't matter what degree of no either, it can be something as gentle as "please give that toy back to X", she slumps her shoulders and goes storming off. BUt not tired she actually listens and doesn't act up when I try to discipline her.

It's 11am, I've had her napping now since 9:30. Let's see if what her mom says is true about it being okay to nap as long as she wants before lunch!
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Old 08-28-2012, 11:23 AM
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So the parents don't have any problem getting her to bed if she doesn't take a nap? What time does she go down for them then and do they need to drive her around?
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Old 08-29-2012, 06:00 AM
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Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo View Post
So the parents don't have any problem getting her to bed if she doesn't take a nap? What time does she go down for them then and do they need to drive her around?
If she doesn't take a nap, she basically passes out on the couch anywhere between 6:30 and 8pm. Mostly closer to 6:30pm. If she naps, she doesn't go to sleep until close to midnight and they then have to drive her around.

I think I've mentioned that Mom admitted that she has no bedtime routine (obviously). Now she has been realizing that both her daughters (her other daughter is 6) are having night terrors.

I mentioned how she napped early yesterday and her mother said that was good. She said, after reading how to deal with night terrors, she is now implementing a bedtime routine...no driving around...nice, calm, relaxing evening, no "extra work" to try to tire the kids out before bed (dad has been taking them outside and trying to drain them with running around just before bed). Anyway, she says she read that you either need to nap, or don't nap, but not to flip flop. So she actually said to me thta she'd prefer her to nap. But she is still stuck on the nap "before lunch". I'm allowed to let her nap as long as she needs, but this means that it screws up my morning outdoor time. At least while indoors we don't have to be quiet while she sleeps, nothing can wake that child!
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Old 08-29-2012, 06:30 AM
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So if she doesn't nap she's sleeping by 6:30? Doesn't she pick her up about 6:00? Does this mom not want to spend any time with her? Pretty much she's falling asleep as soon as she gets home. Great that she changed her mind on the nap. I would have her nap with the other kids. That's crazy to have to juggle 2 different naptimes for you. I think that consistancy is the key here. As long as she's not waking up from her nap at 5:00, I don't see where that should be a problem. Just sounds like the problem is again inconsistancy and lack of structure at home.
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Old 08-29-2012, 06:47 AM
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Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo View Post
So if she doesn't nap she's sleeping by 6:30? Doesn't she pick her up about 6:00? Does this mom not want to spend any time with her?
Yeah, she gets picked up most days at 5:45.

I think someone asked what her parents do that she's here so much. Her mom just opened an esthetic business in her home. She's trying to get as many new clients as she can to build her business so she books in a huge time block to accommodate people. But to her credit, she drops her off later in the morning if she doesn't have any clients first thing (very rare) and picks her up between 3-4pm if she doesn't have clients in the afternoon/early evening.

BUT, most days, her dad drops her off in the morning at 7 when he goes to work and picks her up at 5:45 when he's off work. He drives a company delivery truck so he has to go home first and get their car to pick her up.

It's not that they don't WANT to see her. They adore her. They just don't want to consistently put her to bed at midnight...that much I can understand. But they need to have a more consistent home life.
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Old 08-29-2012, 07:05 AM
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wow they have a hectic life sounds like. I"m sure they love her to pieces, I just don't get sometimes when parents complain about how their child goes to bed when they are only awake like 1 1/2 hours after getting home and that includes dinner. We usually kept our kids up until 9 or 10 after getting home at 5:30. I can't imagine putting them to bed like at 7:00 like some parents do. You're absolutely right though, they have no consistancy. I definately have learned that that is the key to child raising with my own children. I wasn't consistant for a long time and it bit me in the rear. Now I am more consistant and I am seeing improvement. I wish you luck. Sounds like you are doing a great job at trying to make everyone happy!
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Old 08-29-2012, 08:30 AM
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Tell them what they want to hear, then do what works for you and your group. It has happened, and been mentioned many times before, tell the parents what they want to hear, and the problem miraculously goes away, when in fact, nothing really changed in the schedule. At 2 1/2, she should be napping in the afternoon, period. She needs to lay down for the nap period and if she falls asleep, good, if she doesn't, she needs to lay their quietly for the time period allotted and not be disruptive. The rules are quiet simple. Good luck.
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Old 08-29-2012, 09:05 AM
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I agree with this and the part about them not teaching their child to go to sleep without doing it in the car. They started that routine so they are stuck with it.


I don't agree with this. She is capable of being trained to sleep in a crib or bed. It is going to take a few nights of consistency but it can be done. We do it as daycare providers all the time. The key is not to give in. Parents often make more out of bed time then need be. Simple, this is what we do. I also don't agree with giving the child choices for pj's etc...complicates what you want to be a smooth transition and gives open to melt downs. The child is already tired and that is why it is bed time. Line it up, do it and be consistent. I find this works best. When the child is older, and ahead of time before tired sets in if you want to let them pick out the night story yes, great.

I am sorry but I feel kids are given way too many choices at young ages when what they want and need most is an adult to know so they can build trust, choices will come later in life when they are mentally able to handle emotions and understanding better. I am not hard with this and to just one side but I am not on the free range of whatever you want, whatever you do is ok. If you don't want a nap you don't have to have a nap----- no way. Direction.....passing down of the know how, not expecting the know nothing to teach what the should know, should know.
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