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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Do I Look Suspicious?
Kabob 09:00 AM 06-25-2014
So, I am open again after having my baby. I have one child enrolled and I'm enjoying the peaceful days so far and starting fresh, so to speak.

Of course, that also means doing interviews again...

One parent I interviewed for part time care is looking for daycare because her current one became too expensive for her. It's a center and she switched from a home daycare because she wanted a preschool curriculum. I don't offer a curriculum...we learn through play. She seemed fine with that and her child seemed well behaved. She said she wanted to enroll here but now she emailed asking for my husband and I to provide our full names and birthdays so she can run a background check on us.

Would it seem suspicious of me to tell her we already had that done as part of the licensing process (just had it done again in April)? I just don't feel comfortable giving out our birthdays (neither does dh)...plus, I am much younger than my husband (13 years apart) and people tend to be very weirded out by my age (I'm fairly young) especially compared to my husband so I'm always reluctant to share any kind of info about this with my daycare families...the less personal it gets, the better.

I just got a judgmental vibe from dcm and she kind of seems overly concerned about me possibly taking sick days or vacation days and so forth...just sounds like she had a bad experience in the past...

Am I just being overly nervous?
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Little Buttons 09:08 AM 06-25-2014
I wouldn't give out my personal information either! I would provide her with the information to look up you state license and the requirements to have a childcare license in your state. I have had my identity stolen even though I am very cautious and it is not fun!! I also agree that the less personal it gets the better. My husband is 15 years older than me and I completely understand your reservations because so many are very quick to judge lol!
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Butter Biskets 09:09 AM 06-25-2014
I don't think you are being overly nervous at all. I am seeing red flags already too. The background check is probably just her being over paranoid, but the concerns and perceived judgement from her is what I would be concerned about. That is just my opinion though.
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Leigh 09:14 AM 06-25-2014
I encourage families at interviews to contact licensing if they have any questions about my qualifications or background. I don't know what licensing will tell them, but I do explain that background checks have been done, as well as the training required in my job.
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2grls4us 09:16 AM 06-25-2014
Maybe you could spin it to where you can sound like your helping them out and cooperating at the same time.Something like we just had those done in April by our state ageagencies I'd hate for you to pay for a background check when they've already done them. You may see a copy of it if you'd lke. Or even just say your a private person and do not feel comfortable giving out that type of information if she would feel more comfortable with medting your husband or any assistant s that you use you'd be happy to set something up?

Just my thoughts?
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Kabob 09:36 AM 06-25-2014
Originally Posted by Little Buttons:
I wouldn't give out my personal information either! I would provide her with the information to look up you state license and the requirements to have a childcare license in your state. I have had my identity stolen even though I am very cautious and it is not fun!! I also agree that the less personal it gets the better. My husband is 15 years older than me and I completely understand your reservations because so many are very quick to judge lol!
I also had my identity stolen fairly recently...they got my social security number and everything all because my bank sent a document through the mail with my social security number on it and someone stole it from my mail box...fortunately the police caught him but the damage was done. So that too is always on my mind...

And yes, people always look at us strangely and make rude comments about our age difference...doesn't bother me what strangers think but I just never delve into my personal life with my daycare families beyond what they need to know for daycare purposes. I just haven't ever had this question come up before since most people know and trust that licensing has taken care of this concern...

Originally Posted by 2grls4us:
Maybe you could spin it to where you can sound like your helping them out and cooperating at the same time.Something like we just had those done in April by our state ageagencies I'd hate for you to pay for a background check when they've already done them. You may see a copy of it if you'd lke. Or even just say your a private person and do not feel comfortable giving out that type of information if she would feel more comfortable with medting your husband or any assistant s that you use you'd be happy to set something up?

Just my thoughts?
She already met my husband and children. I asked her to bring her husband but he chose not to attend so I told her that if she was interested, she needed to schedule a second interview with her husband present to go over my handbook and such.

Maybe I'll just offer my licensor's number and offer to show my background clearances? I also thought of suggesting it as a way to save time and money...just wasn't sure if I sounded creepy.
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TwinKristi 11:12 AM 06-25-2014
I wouldn't provide that information for anyone else. I have already provided it PLUS my fingerprints for a state agency which runs my information through a local and national DOJ & FBI database. If that's not good enough then I would say "See ya!" That's personal information that isn't required. I appreciate their desire to make sure we "check out" but I wouldn't give that to anyone else. What if things go bad and then they have that info? I mean, it's just setting yourself up for a potential issue. If anything I would like to do background and credit checks on MY potential clients who may stiff me for thousands of dollars, bounce checks, file fraudulent insurance claims, etc. It goes both ways. In fact, you could counter that you're willing to share some of the information when they provide YOU with even MORE information to run a credit and background check.
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SignMeUp 11:42 AM 06-25-2014
Our background checks have our SS# and driver's license #.

Show it to them = No Way

Give them info to do their own = Heck No

Direct them to licensing IF you want to proceed.

I could understand this request coming from a family who has used a nanny in the past, or who does not understand how FCC works. But otherwise, not so much.
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AmyKidsCo 12:41 PM 06-25-2014
I wouldn't give out my personal information either, especially since you've already had them run. You could copy it for her, and black out SSN, etc.
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2grls4us 01:12 PM 06-25-2014
I only receive a letter stating they did not find anything on my background check or finger printings. So I would be willing to share that, but no not anything with socials or personal ID.
Good luck and congrats on your new baby!
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KiddieCahoots 01:22 PM 06-25-2014
I agree with everybody else.
That licensing has done that, and can accommodate her curiosity is quite enough.
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Kabob 03:08 PM 06-25-2014
Originally Posted by TwinKristi:
I wouldn't provide that information for anyone else. I have already provided it PLUS my fingerprints for a state agency which runs my information through a local and national DOJ & FBI database. If that's not good enough then I would say "See ya!" That's personal information that isn't required. I appreciate their desire to make sure we "check out" but I wouldn't give that to anyone else. What if things go bad and then they have that info? I mean, it's just setting yourself up for a potential issue. If anything I would like to do background and credit checks on MY potential clients who may stiff me for thousands of dollars, bounce checks, file fraudulent insurance claims, etc. It goes both ways. In fact, you could counter that you're willing to share some of the information when they provide YOU with even MORE information to run a credit and background check.
I never thought of it this way. Now I feel less crazy for worrying about this. Apparently I am not alone.
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Blackcat31 03:15 PM 06-25-2014
Originally Posted by Kabob:
I never thought of it this way. Now I feel less crazy for worrying about this. Apparently I am not alone.
You can refer parents to the licensing look up site for ALL providers in the state.

It lists any citations or correction orders a provider may have on file.

If you do not have this link, let me know and I will get it for you.
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Michelle 03:46 PM 06-25-2014
Also, I am pretty sure that licensing does a more thorough background check than an average citizen can do.
We are cleared by DOJ,FBI, child abuse index report and any public arrest record made in al 50 states!
I am sure it will be a lot better than what she can pull up.

Also, good old fashioned " mommy instincts" are better than any background check
trust me, I know this first hand
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Kabob 03:54 PM 06-25-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
You can refer parents to the licensing look up site for ALL providers in the state.

It lists any citations or correction orders a provider may have on file.

If you do not have this link, let me know and I will get it for you.
Thanks for the idea! I included the link for her in my response. It doesn't show anything interesting, but at least it helps show I have nothing to hide...

Although... I'm thinking more and more either she doesn't have experience with a licensed daycare (due to trying to save money...I apparently am the first licensed daycare she ever visited besides a center) or she thinks I'm her employee. The second option would not work out for her...

I hope she doesn't take it personally that I don't want to get personal.
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jenboo 04:16 PM 06-25-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
You can refer parents to the licensing look up site for ALL providers in the state.

It lists any citations or correction orders a provider may have on file.

If you do not have this link, let me know and I will get it for you.
Is this for every state? If so, can I get it please
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TwinKristi 05:02 PM 06-25-2014
Originally Posted by jenboo:
Is this for every state? If so, can I get it please
No it's not... CA doesn't even have one! It's in the works I hear but not all states do this! They should, but they don't!
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originalkat 07:28 AM 06-26-2014
I would NEVER provide my clients with personal information to do a background check. That is hilarious that she thinks she has the right to do so. This WHY WE ARE LICENSED!!!! The background checks are done by the state. Period. If that is not sufficient for her then run along.
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craftymissbeth 07:40 AM 06-26-2014
If she goes to a center does she require full names and birth dates of every single staff member who can come in contact with her child? While I understand making sure you have the safest provider and environment possible for your child, but this is going too far. If there was anything on your record then you wouldn't be licensed.

I use Google, Facebook, and KBI registered offender registry to "background check" my potential parents. We can also send in a request to DCF (along with $10) to do our own child abuse registry check. I don't need their personal information to get all of that, either.

ETA: parents are free to do all the searching on me they want, but they have to do it using my first and last name.
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Unregistered 08:29 AM 06-26-2014
The way I see that is I am already registered and have had a background check done. Anything parents need to know about me is online. The next step is for me to background check the clients. They are strangers and I know nothing about them AND let them in my home around my childcare....
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Unregistered 08:35 AM 06-26-2014
The way I see that is I am already registered and have had a background check done. Anything parents need to know about me is online. The next step is for me to background check the clients. They are strangers and I know nothing about them AND let them in my home around my childcare....
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Kabob 09:01 AM 06-26-2014
Originally Posted by craftymissbeth:
If she goes to a center does she require full names and birth dates of every single staff member who can come in contact with her child? While I understand making sure you have the safest provider and environment possible for your child, but this is going too far. If there was anything on your record then you wouldn't be licensed.

I use Google, Facebook, and KBI registered offender registry to "background check" my potential parents. We can also send in a request to DCF (along with $10) to do our own child abuse registry check. I don't need their personal information to get all of that, either.

ETA: parents are free to do all the searching on me they want, but they have to do it using my first and last name.
Good point. I'm going to assume she didn't know I was background checked already as she replied with a short response saying she's ok with that and then asked more questions regarding how strict my scheduling policy is...good questions to ask now rather than just assume like a previous family did...worried about how uncertain she is but better for her to decide I'm not the daycare for her beforehand rather than deciding I'm not a good fit after I've already invested more time and energy into this...

Side note, I honestly didn't think to check facebook before (since I only use it to keep in touch with relatives). This turned out to be a good learning experience.
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LysesKids 05:57 PM 06-26-2014
I had a parent ask me for the same stuff 4 years ago... I told her the state did a background check and that I was not giving my personal info to her or her mom to do another one ( she wanted past employment & credit info too... ummm NO); she quit 2 days in because I locked the front door when I had to pee (babies were napping); she hired a nanny
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Tags:background check, giving personal info out, licensing look up, parent background check, personal information, references
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