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Unregistered 12:51 PM 06-16-2011
I'd like some opinions on this...
My daycare provider has friended me on facebook. She posts often about how (in roundabout ways) she doesn't like her job. The job I pay her to do! The job that allows her to stay home with her daughter...something I'd trade anything to be able to do! I know it's not easy...no job is. But I wouldn't be complaining to my boss about my job! I like my paycheck, thank you!
I'm so irritated and frustrated and I don't know what to do. It's hurtful and very unprofessional in my eyes. Do I say something? If I do, I worry that she will just fester and be angry with us. But by ignoring it, my husband and I are growing increasingly annoyed with her. And now I worry my child (and the others) isn't well cared for if shes busy posting on facebook all the time.
So what do I do? Has anyone else had a similar situation? How did you handle it?
My daycare provider has friended me on facebook. She posts often about how (in roundabout ways) she doesn't like her job. The job I pay her to do! The job that allows her to stay home with her daughter...something I'd trade anything to be able to do! I know it's not easy...no job is. But I wouldn't be complaining to my boss about my job! I like my paycheck, thank you!
I'm so irritated and frustrated and I don't know what to do. It's hurtful and very unprofessional in my eyes. Do I say something? If I do, I worry that she will just fester and be angry with us. But by ignoring it, my husband and I are growing increasingly annoyed with her. And now I worry my child (and the others) isn't well cared for if shes busy posting on facebook all the time.
So what do I do? Has anyone else had a similar situation? How did you handle it?
cheerfuldom 12:56 PM 06-16-2011
It sounds very unprofessional. I think you have to weigh what exactly she is saying. She should not be online all day and should not be making specific comments about kids or parents. However, if she is venting to friends in a general way (like "had a long day, now I am ready for a nap") than I would unfriend her and give her the space to do that. I understand why you would have mixed feelings on this but from the provider's standpoint, she does need some outlets and it may be best for the two of you not to use FB as a means of communicating.
Crystal 12:59 PM 06-16-2011
Facebook is dangerous.
I would ask her about it. I'd ask her if there is anything that she needs to make her job more enjoyable. I'd ask her if she feels that her unhappiness with her work affects her care of the children. I'd be ready to remove my children from her care. I'd be freindly, but direct.
Now, sure, we all have bad days....but when we begin to complain on a regular basis, then it is time for some self-reflection and an honest assessment of where we stand in our career. If we aren't happy, then it is time to try something new....and that goes for ANY job......not just the some times unthankful job of child care.
I beleive that if a provider is at the point that they are complaining to the parent about their work with children, then they are on serious burnout and need to take a break. I'd either offer to help her, or move my children.
I would ask her about it. I'd ask her if there is anything that she needs to make her job more enjoyable. I'd ask her if she feels that her unhappiness with her work affects her care of the children. I'd be ready to remove my children from her care. I'd be freindly, but direct.
Now, sure, we all have bad days....but when we begin to complain on a regular basis, then it is time for some self-reflection and an honest assessment of where we stand in our career. If we aren't happy, then it is time to try something new....and that goes for ANY job......not just the some times unthankful job of child care.
I beleive that if a provider is at the point that they are complaining to the parent about their work with children, then they are on serious burnout and need to take a break. I'd either offer to help her, or move my children.
GG~DAYCARE 01:03 PM 06-16-2011
I am friends on fb with some of my parents. I never post about my daycare day!!! Oh how I would love to say something like " Boy, am I glad this week is over. The kids have been bonkers all week!" I don't because of the same thing. I don't want my parents to feel it is their child that made me so tired or that maybe I am getting too old for my job! I agree, unfb friend her. If this is the only thing you see wrong going on than unfriend her today. Good luck!!
Unregistered 01:11 PM 06-16-2011
Thanks for your replies!
I totally understand that everyone needs to vent...I do, you do, we all do! But there is a time and a place and certain people to do it with. She should have made a seperate account for work and one for freinds where she can complain away and none of us would know...
She never names names, but she's always complaining about it being Monday, how she needs more long weekends, vacations, "Hopeless" dreams of a day off, and this is a beauty: "Wish there was one day where I didn't have to listen to a child cry and scream for what seems like hours!! Ahhhh- I need a day off!!"
I mean, come on!
I totally understand that everyone needs to vent...I do, you do, we all do! But there is a time and a place and certain people to do it with. She should have made a seperate account for work and one for freinds where she can complain away and none of us would know...
She never names names, but she's always complaining about it being Monday, how she needs more long weekends, vacations, "Hopeless" dreams of a day off, and this is a beauty: "Wish there was one day where I didn't have to listen to a child cry and scream for what seems like hours!! Ahhhh- I need a day off!!"
I mean, come on!
grandmom 01:18 PM 06-16-2011
I agree with you. I'd be upset too.
Unfriend her.
Unfriend her.
Live and Learn 01:28 PM 06-16-2011
I would speak to your daycare provider.
Communication is everything.
BTW. She isn't all that smart.....IMO she is biting the hand that feeds her. That usually doesn't end well.
Communication is everything.
BTW. She isn't all that smart.....IMO she is biting the hand that feeds her. That usually doesn't end well.
Ariana 01:36 PM 06-16-2011
I'm friends with my DCM's as well and make sure I don't do this!! It's pretty unprofessional IMO. Is it possible that she's just a big complainer and isn't really serious about it? I have FB friends that complain constantly, it's annoying!!
Unregistered 01:42 PM 06-16-2011
Ohhh, she's serious! It's pretty much the only thing she complains about.
Now see, I could unfriend her....but then I have no idea what smack she's talking. I kind of want to know now! It will only hide the problem from me instead of making it go away.
Would the providers out there be angry with the parents if they brought something like this up? My child is there all day with her...I don't want him to suffer any backlash or ill will that she would possibly have with us!
She's totally biting the hand that feeds her...it just amazes me.
Now see, I could unfriend her....but then I have no idea what smack she's talking. I kind of want to know now! It will only hide the problem from me instead of making it go away.
Would the providers out there be angry with the parents if they brought something like this up? My child is there all day with her...I don't want him to suffer any backlash or ill will that she would possibly have with us!
She's totally biting the hand that feeds her...it just amazes me.
Michael 01:51 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Ohhh, she's serious! It's pretty much the only thing she complains about.
Now see, I could unfriend her....but then I have no idea what smack she's talking. I kind of want to know now! It will only hide the problem from me instead of making it go away.
Would the providers out there be angry with the parents if they brought something like this up? My child is there all day with her...I don't want him to suffer any backlash or ill will that she would possibly have with us!
She's totally biting the hand that feeds her...it just amazes me.
As long as your employee is doing her job and not slandering you I would not worry about it. This person has obviously not learned how to manage her image. The world has changed and she should be using the web in a better manner.Ohhh, she's serious! It's pretty much the only thing she complains about.
Now see, I could unfriend her....but then I have no idea what smack she's talking. I kind of want to know now! It will only hide the problem from me instead of making it go away.
Would the providers out there be angry with the parents if they brought something like this up? My child is there all day with her...I don't want him to suffer any backlash or ill will that she would possibly have with us!
She's totally biting the hand that feeds her...it just amazes me.
sharlan 01:53 PM 06-16-2011
I am friends with former clients on fb. I would never post anything anywhere (fb, forum, etc) that I would be embarrased or afraid to say in person to anybody...
First you need to talk to her and question what she has posted. If she tells you that she's burned out, it's time to find new daycare.
First you need to talk to her and question what she has posted. If she tells you that she's burned out, it's time to find new daycare.
momofthree 01:53 PM 06-16-2011
I think you should confront her about her status on fb. You should try to help her like saying talking to her, bring her some coffee, thank you verbal or by email. Providers appreciate these things. Yes it might be unprofessional but that is the only way she can vent or maybe she is reaching out there to get help. It might not be the kids but alot of it can be the parents not you but some of her parents that she has, maybe late for pick up, not paying her on time. So try to talk to her.
Live and Learn 01:59 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by Michael:
As long as your employee is doing her job and not slandering you I would not worry about it. This person has obviously not learned how to manage her image. The world has changed and she should be using the web in a better manner.
As long as your employee is doing her job and not slandering you I would not worry about it. This person has obviously not learned how to manage her image. The world has changed and she should be using the web in a better manner.
Technically the daycare provider is not the parent's employee. If they were, the parent would have to pay social security, workman's comp, minimum wage, etc.I understand what you are saying though.
Op: that would totally bug me.
I would speak to her and be prepared to look for a new daycare. The same dc provider who is stupid enough to post on FB how much she doesn't like her job is also the same dc provider who will flip out if you try to speak to her as an adult about it.
daycare 02:01 PM 06-16-2011
I hate FB
introduce her to this site so that she can vent to people who understand...
You never vent to the people who pay you....
introduce her to this site so that she can vent to people who understand...
You never vent to the people who pay you....
Blackcat31 02:10 PM 06-16-2011
OP, as a daycare provider, I wish all parents who had an issue or concern over something would come directly to me with those concerns. If I have an issue with a parent and I need for change to happen, I go directly to that parent. Venting is a fabulous outlet for release of stress and tension, however, it doesn't really solve anything....kwim? My advice would be to simply explain your concerns to your provider/friend.
In her defense, she may never have even considered how her posts (vents) read to others and would appreciate your bringing it up. Of course, bringing your concerns to her in a positive way will help. Maybe try saying that you just wanted to share your concerns with her because others may view it as unprofessional and you would hate for her to be thought of that way when you value her services....
In her defense, she may never have even considered how her posts (vents) read to others and would appreciate your bringing it up. Of course, bringing your concerns to her in a positive way will help. Maybe try saying that you just wanted to share your concerns with her because others may view it as unprofessional and you would hate for her to be thought of that way when you value her services....
Auntie 02:13 PM 06-16-2011
I have parents that are my friends on fb and I would NEVER EVER complain about my job or kids on fb. That is just WRONG. FB is not my diary. My boss is also on my FB.
I have this board to come to where missery loves company, LOL just kidding.
Like you understand we all need to vent and FB IS NOT the place for it.
I have this board to come to where missery loves company, LOL just kidding.
Like you understand we all need to vent and FB IS NOT the place for it.
Country Kids 02:14 PM 06-16-2011
Recommend for her to use this site! She may be just feeling frustrated and yes FB isn't the place but seriously when you do not talk to any adults for 9+ hours a day you just want to talk. Her feelings probably are legitamate and she just wants to get some steam off. This is another instant of if you haven't walked in our shoes please try and understand where a provider is coming from. Yes, you are a client but I would unfriend her on FB. Have you ever gone a full day with having multiple children crying or the same one crying over and over. Alot of providers don't get to leave their home and sometimes that means you are stuck at home for 50+ hours a week. That is something clients just don't understand. We are literally with our work the entire time we are working (no walk away breaks) and then we live where we work also. So please try and understand where she is coming from and see if there is anything you can help her with. If she brings up a concern about your child, seriously listen to it and work with her. Don't just brush it off.
GG~DAYCARE 02:17 PM 06-16-2011
Try replying to one of her posts with "having a rough day?" Maybe than she will realize how it comes off on fb. Like I said, I would never post stuff I will regret later. I type and sometimes I just delete the whole post after I read how silly it sounds!
cheerfuldom 02:18 PM 06-16-2011
If you think that she is the kind of person to take out her anger or frustration out on a child, you need to remove your child. You need to find someone you can trust. There are always going to be issues that need to be discussed with any provider. You should be able to go to them without fear that they will retaliate on an innocent child to get back at you. I am not saying that I believe she would do this only that you need to trust your provider. If this isn't someone you trust than find someone you can instead of stewing about an issue you feel you can't discuss openly.
Auntie 02:25 PM 06-16-2011
Maybe make a post to one of her comments encouraging her as a provider.
OR you could post to her post: you would never know you are this stressed out when I pick up. Or do you need me to come pick up so and so?
OR you could post to her post: you would never know you are this stressed out when I pick up. Or do you need me to come pick up so and so?
jen 02:37 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by Michael:
As long as your employee is doing her job and not slandering you I would not worry about it. This person has obviously not learned how to manage her image. The world has changed and she should be using the web in a better manner.
What??As long as your employee is doing her job and not slandering you I would not worry about it. This person has obviously not learned how to manage her image. The world has changed and she should be using the web in a better manner.
Unprofessional yes, maybe even grounds to move on...but please, please don't give parents the idea that we are their employee!
Michael 02:42 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by jen:
What??
Unprofessional yes, maybe even grounds to move on...but please, please don't give parents the idea that we are their employee!
I was talking in general terms in regards to FB. I am not going to go back and rewrite it. What??
Unprofessional yes, maybe even grounds to move on...but please, please don't give parents the idea that we are their employee!
DEBBIES DAYCARE 02:56 PM 06-16-2011
Facebook is not a forum to vent about any job. I have known more than one person making comments about a bad day at work and was fired or reprimanded. It was very inprofessional and childish to state her "business" on FB.
I never encourage parents to feel I work for them or they are my boss. I have more than once in casual conversation reminded some that I am self employed and they purchase a service I offer.
I never encourage parents to feel I work for them or they are my boss. I have more than once in casual conversation reminded some that I am self employed and they purchase a service I offer.
wdmmom 03:01 PM 06-16-2011
I have 2 accounts...1 for daycare parents only and 1 personal account. The one where I can say I feel like ripping my hair out, can't wait til Friday and ready for beer-thirty.
I keep both separate. All DCP are welcome to the DC account so they can view photos, the lunch menu and upcoming events.
On the flip side...I hate seeing my dcp's posts about taking the day off but bringing their kid to daycare and lying about why they are late picking up when it's clear you went tubing down the river, you didn't get caught up on a phone call at work. What happened to honest parents. If you're taking the day off to paint the kitchen, you're taking the day off to paint the kitchen...why lie?!
I keep both separate. All DCP are welcome to the DC account so they can view photos, the lunch menu and upcoming events.
On the flip side...I hate seeing my dcp's posts about taking the day off but bringing their kid to daycare and lying about why they are late picking up when it's clear you went tubing down the river, you didn't get caught up on a phone call at work.
What happened to honest parents. If you're taking the day off to paint the kitchen, you're taking the day off to paint the kitchen...why lie?!
daycare 03:12 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by wdmmom:
I have 2 accounts...1 for daycare parents only and 1 personal account. The one where I can say I feel like ripping my hair out, can't wait til Friday and ready for beer-thirty.
I keep both separate. All DCP are welcome to the DC account so they can view photos, the lunch menu and upcoming events.
On the flip side...I hate seeing my dcp's posts about taking the day off but bringing their kid to daycare and lying about why they are late picking up when it's clear you went tubing down the river, you didn't get caught up on a phone call at work. What happened to honest parents. If you're taking the day off to paint the kitchen, you're taking the day off to paint the kitchen...why lie?!
lmao sorry I got a good laugh out of your post!I have 2 accounts...1 for daycare parents only and 1 personal account. The one where I can say I feel like ripping my hair out, can't wait til Friday and ready for beer-thirty.
I keep both separate. All DCP are welcome to the DC account so they can view photos, the lunch menu and upcoming events.
On the flip side...I hate seeing my dcp's posts about taking the day off but bringing their kid to daycare and lying about why they are late picking up when it's clear you went tubing down the river, you didn't get caught up on a phone call at work.
What happened to honest parents. If you're taking the day off to paint the kitchen, you're taking the day off to paint the kitchen...why lie?!
youretooloud 03:24 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by GG~DAYCARE:
Try replying to one of her posts with "having a rough day?" Maybe than she will realize how it comes off on fb. Like I said, I would never post stuff I will regret later. I type and sometimes I just delete the whole post after I read how silly it sounds!
Great idea!Try replying to one of her posts with "having a rough day?" Maybe than she will realize how it comes off on fb. Like I said, I would never post stuff I will regret later. I type and sometimes I just delete the whole post after I read how silly it sounds!
That's what I would do too.
But, in her defense, it sounds like maybe she IS having a rough day. I have kids that can make my whole day miserable, and it's just a really hard day. A little compassion really goes a long way.
Last spring, I had a VERY difficult child... we were all just trying to get through summer until a spot in a special needs school opened up. I had a mom that just "got it" bring me a large tea from starbucks and tell me her daughter wanted to get it for me. But, I knew it was the mom's idea, and I knew they were just trying to make my day a little brighter.
Unregistered 03:49 PM 06-16-2011
I would say nothing as I would want to know how she was really feeling and thinking about her job. I would not want her to start pretending all was sunshine and roses all of a sudden. I would keep an eye on things, and if she seems on the road to burn out, then I would start looking elsewhere.
Plus, I would kill he with kindess the next couple of weeks, it may swing her out of the slump she is in. Say thank you, and show that you appreciate her. Bring her a coffee, tea,cookies,flowers from you garden, or some other small gesture. Pick up your child early one day if possible. See if she mentions any of these kind gestures on facebook.
Plus, I would kill he with kindess the next couple of weeks, it may swing her out of the slump she is in. Say thank you, and show that you appreciate her. Bring her a coffee, tea,cookies,flowers from you garden, or some other small gesture. Pick up your child early one day if possible. See if she mentions any of these kind gestures on facebook.
Unregistered 04:01 PM 06-16-2011
I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
Michael 04:07 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
She might just be a chronic complainer; her way of letting off stress. She should keep it to herself but she obviously needs an audience for it to work.I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
sahm2three 04:10 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
If it is her personal account, I say it is her business. Now if she were complaining on her business account, that would be another thing. We are all entitled to complain about our days/jobs/whatever. No one has a great day every day, do they? I know I sure don't. This job is HARD. We don't have coworkers to vent to. All we have is little people running around barking orders at us all the live long day, lol. I say cut her some slack. Maybe it is therapeutic for her. As long as she isn't naming names, who cares?! Just my 2 cents.I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
Ariana 04:16 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by GG~DAYCARE:
Try replying to one of her posts with "having a rough day?" Maybe than she will realize how it comes off on fb. Like I said, I would never post stuff I will regret later. I type and sometimes I just delete the whole post after I read how silly it sounds!
I think this is a great idea! Say something about it to let her know you're reading it. Then maybe say something that day when you pick up the kids like "it sounds like you're really stressed, I hope my kids aren't causing you too much trouble...we could try and find another provider" etc etc. (I don't know if you'd feel comfortable 'threatening' to pull your kids but it could help make her realize what she's doing).Try replying to one of her posts with "having a rough day?" Maybe than she will realize how it comes off on fb. Like I said, I would never post stuff I will regret later. I type and sometimes I just delete the whole post after I read how silly it sounds!
I think if you feel uncomfortable and don't consider this just 'innocent complaining' you might want to consider moving your kids
MyAngels 04:24 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
I may have a somewhat different perspective on this. I have had my home daycare for 19 years now, and thinking back to the days when I first started out, I can remember feeling isolated, unhappy and stressed. However, I never let that affect how I related to the kids that I cared for at the time. I always took my responsibility to those children and families very seriously. It took a bit of time for me to realize what an excellent career choice I had made. I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
Your provider may be exactly the same way, but the only way you will know for sure will be to talk with her about it. If she doesn't take that in the spirit that it is intended, then you may have the answer as to whether she is the right provider for your child. If you aren't able to bring yourself to talk with her about it and are having doubts about the quality of care, then you should at least pop in at some unexpected times so that you may have a better idea of what's going on when you are not around.
I knew there was a reason I never signed up for Facebook
.
wdmmom 06:11 PM 06-16-2011
Originally Posted by daycare:
lmao sorry I got a good laugh out of your post!
I'm glad! lmao sorry I got a good laugh out of your post!
I've dealt with one chronic Facebook mom who clearly forgets that we're friends.
No, you didn't get stuck on a call late from work when it says you went home from work at 930am, went out for lunch with your girlfriend, and went out of town to hang out with an old high school buddy. DUHHHHHHH. People must think I was born at night. (Which is true.) It just wasn't last night.
MamaBear 07:17 PM 06-16-2011
I would unfriend her.... I have a FB page for my daycare families and another for my personal use. If I ever do vent, I for sure would never do it on the daycare FB page. I would just unfriend her on FB so you dont have to see it.
I unfriended one of my daycare parents on FB before because I didnt like her posts... So it could go both ways. She would tell me she was heading to work and then update her FB status minutes later with things like "Ugh so glad to have a break from my kid ~ now time to go home and go back to bed" or other random posts like that. She'd pick up late and lie about how busy she was at work. I think she didnt realize that I could see her updates. So it was better for me to just unfriend her on FB then to get ticked off seeing her postings.
Good luck!
I unfriended one of my daycare parents on FB before because I didnt like her posts... So it could go both ways. She would tell me she was heading to work and then update her FB status minutes later with things like "Ugh so glad to have a break from my kid ~ now time to go home and go back to bed" or other random posts like that. She'd pick up late and lie about how busy she was at work. I think she didnt realize that I could see her updates. So it was better for me to just unfriend her on FB then to get ticked off seeing her postings.
Good luck!
Meyou 04:31 AM 06-17-2011
I have daycare parents on my facebook and the worst thing I have ever posted was "The munchkins are revolting! I'm outnumbered!" That was a particularly bad day and that was a big vent for me. A few parents saw it and asked how bad it was and I just said I needed a little vent because it was a trying day. No biggie for my famliies but I would NEVER post anything that could hurt feelings or be connected to any particular child or about feeling trapped by my job. It's rude and unprofessional.
jen 05:29 AM 06-17-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
Personally, I wouldn't post anything that my parents could read, but to be honest, I don't really think the "three days of freedom" thing is a big deal. I don't think you completely understand how difficult it can be for a provider even to run to the bathroom. That said...I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
Children are our most precious gift so it makes sense that you are taking this personally. However, this is a business and you need to treat it as such. If you went to the store and you didn't like the service or the attitude of the people who work there you would probably move on. I suggest you sit down with the provider, putting all personal feelings of hurt, dismay, etc. aside and try to determine where the provider is coming from. If you don't like the answer give your notice and find a service provider with whom you feel more comfortable.
Daycare is hard and it isn't for everyone. People who are doing it to stay home or bring in a paycheck despite the fact that they don't enjoy it aren't going to be good providers in the long run. Which isn't to say that we don't do it to be home or earn a paycheck, you just have to not hate it.
Cat Herder 06:10 AM 06-17-2011
Just a few months ago I posted "Provider down!!! Bring Chocolate!!" and 3 of my clients actually did at pick-up (I had 3 1yo's weaning from the bottle at once)....
I would send her a personal FB message and just ask " Would you prefer I find another provider? Your posts make me feel bad and I don't want my kids to be the source of your unhappiness."
It may be the jolt she needs or the sign you are waiting for.
Good luck, hun. The whole situation stinks, IMHO.
)....I would send her a personal FB message and just ask " Would you prefer I find another provider? Your posts make me feel bad and I don't want my kids to be the source of your unhappiness."
It may be the jolt she needs or the sign you are waiting for.
Good luck, hun. The whole situation stinks, IMHO.
Unregistered 07:40 AM 06-17-2011
I have been in this situation and I did exactly what a previous poster mentioned - I replied to her status update so everyone could see and said something like "Oh no! What did (my children) do?" She got very defensive, saying "Oh, not your kids...yada yada yada" and then never posted those kind of statuses again! It worked! Ha!
PeanutsGalore 09:28 AM 06-17-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I have been in this situation and I did exactly what a previous poster mentioned - I replied to her status update so everyone could see and said something like "Oh no! What did (my children) do?" She got very defensive, saying "Oh, not your kids...yada yada yada" and then never posted those kind of statuses again! It worked! Ha!
This sounds like it may be a good idea! To the OP: I don't think this person is hating on her job. Daycare is not a job like any other, and if she's kind of new to this profession (ie: started it in order to stay home with her first child), it's a huge adjustment. Whereas in almost any other job, you have SOMEONE to vent on in order to avoid having to do it in front of your boss in a professional way, with in-home daycare, you have NOBODY to talk to. All day long. Couple that with not being able to take a bathroom break, or a lunch break, or a snack break in any sort of reliable way, and yes--sometimes having children screaming all day long, it's stress on a totally different level than what you can understand unless you've done it. And you love the children, of course, but they're not yours. And yes, it does make a difference. Nobody loves a child like a mama or papa. I have been in this situation and I did exactly what a previous poster mentioned - I replied to her status update so everyone could see and said something like "Oh no! What did (my children) do?" She got very defensive, saying "Oh, not your kids...yada yada yada" and then never posted those kind of statuses again! It worked! Ha!
Not excusing her unprofessional behavior, but I don't think venting about looking forward to time off when you don't have to listen to children screaming all day is an indication that she doesn't like her job. She's just looking forward to her time off, like everyone does when a 3-day weekend is coming up.
If it makes you uncomfortable because of the unprofessionalism, I would address that with her, either in a roundaabout way by posting on her fb comments, or if that doesn't work, by talking to her directly. IMO, the fact that she doesn't seem to understand that she shouldn't be posting what she's posting to whom she's posting it is more of a concern than what she's actually saying. But not a huge deal (IMO) since a lot of people don't really get that in this day and age.
You aren't her boss, but you are her customer and have every right to air your concerns, especially since this is your child we're talking about. And as a customer, your money can always walk elsewhere if she doesn't address your concerns. Good luck!
jen 09:40 AM 06-17-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
Just a few months ago I posted "Provider down!!! Bring Chocolate!!" and 3 of my clients actually did at pick-up (I had 3 1yo's weaning from the bottle at once)....
LOL!! That was really cute and funny! You have great clients!Just a few months ago I posted "Provider down!!! Bring Chocolate!!" and 3 of my clients actually did at pick-up (I had 3 1yo's weaning from the bottle at once
)....
Unregistered 10:17 AM 06-17-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
Why do you stay? Surely you'd rather have your child somewhere else where the provider actually likes what she's doing for a living. I've been following your posts and updates all along. Personally, if my child was at a daycare and I found out the daycare provider was complaining regularly about her job on FB or to me as the customer, I wouldn't want my child there. If you owned a business, would you hire employees that hate their job? Would you keep an employee that complains publicly constantly about their job? Your child is one of the most important people in your life. I certainly wouldn't have trust anymore, because there's a big difference between complaining to your friends privately and complaining regularly publicly on FB, even after parents are writing back to her. If you think that her attitude isn't reflecting on your children during the day, you're wrong. No one who hates their job puts on a brave, happy face and performs at 100%. Daycare providers are people you don't want hating their jobs. What is talking to her going to get you? She'll just unfriend you or hide it. Her attitude isn't going to change overnight just because you sympathize with her or ask her if you can help. You're not her therapist, you're the customer. She needs to get it together or find some other type of work.I'd like to thank everyone for their insight!
I know it's a very hard job to do, I give all daycare providers huge kudos for what they do. Kids are fun, but they're incredibly difficult at times too. I know the days are long, you're at home all day, and you can't really have an in depth conversation about current events with a 3 year old. I have 2 kids, I work full time outside of the home...I'm busy too. My job is stressful as well. I work customer service for a large corporation, I deal with my fair share of jerks everyday. I don't whine about it to where my boss can hear me though. That would be very unprofessional on my part, and would probably get me fired. But you grin and bear it and remember why you went into that profession in the first place. For her, it was so she could be home with her baby. Now she seems to have no interest in anyone but her baby. Her post tonight was that she has a long weekend coming up and can't wait for "three days of freedom".
The other parents and I post when she complains....ask her if so and so is having a bad day, how can we help, can I come lend a hand etc, but it gets brushed off or excused away. It's depressing to think that the woman I have entrusted the care of my child with could really have no interest in her job.
So, I don't know. I'm kind of at a loss for words now. I'm sad, angry, hurt, dumbfounded....I need to talk to her....maybe she somehow can't see how what she says would affect the parents. I don't want to start trouble if she can't see what she's doing is wrong.
Unregistered 11:40 AM 06-17-2011
Thanks everyone.
The whole situation just stinks, and those of you who hate fb - I do too! It always seems to cause problems. Too bad it's so addictive ;P
So trying to be super nice and to see if she could post something positive about her day, we brought her a coffee this morning. So far no updates, but I'm waiting for it, whether it be good or bad. We also only bring my child 4 days a week, and she gets paid for a full week. That's a nice bonus right there, right?
I know kids aren't easy to work with all day - I have a 6 year old and a 3 year old (granted it's not a houseful, but I do know where you are coming from). I know it's hard...when I'm not at work, I'm on the job as mom. I know there are times you can't take a break or eat a meal sitting down. Or go pee by yourself.
My confidence in her is completey shaken now. If the complaining wasn't that often, I could brush this off easily. But it's so frequent....and it's not a recent slump, she's been posting like this since October (just recently "friended" me), and complaining more and more regularly.
Why do I stay? She's one of the very few in my area that I can actually afford. But I think it may be time to think about moving on. I just want my lil guy to be loved during the day.
Garh!
The whole situation just stinks, and those of you who hate fb - I do too! It always seems to cause problems. Too bad it's so addictive ;P
So trying to be super nice and to see if she could post something positive about her day, we brought her a coffee this morning. So far no updates, but I'm waiting for it, whether it be good or bad. We also only bring my child 4 days a week, and she gets paid for a full week. That's a nice bonus right there, right?
I know kids aren't easy to work with all day - I have a 6 year old and a 3 year old (granted it's not a houseful, but I do know where you are coming from). I know it's hard...when I'm not at work, I'm on the job as mom. I know there are times you can't take a break or eat a meal sitting down. Or go pee by yourself.
My confidence in her is completey shaken now. If the complaining wasn't that often, I could brush this off easily. But it's so frequent....and it's not a recent slump, she's been posting like this since October (just recently "friended" me), and complaining more and more regularly.
Why do I stay? She's one of the very few in my area that I can actually afford. But I think it may be time to think about moving on. I just want my lil guy to be loved during the day.
Garh!
jen 12:10 PM 06-17-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Thanks everyone.
The whole situation just stinks, and those of you who hate fb - I do too! It always seems to cause problems. Too bad it's so addictive ;P
So trying to be super nice and to see if she could post something positive about her day, we brought her a coffee this morning. So far no updates, but I'm waiting for it, whether it be good or bad. We also only bring my child 4 days a week, and she gets paid for a full week. That's a nice bonus right there, right?
I know kids aren't easy to work with all day - I have a 6 year old and a 3 year old (granted it's not a houseful, but I do know where you are coming from). I know it's hard...when I'm not at work, I'm on the job as mom. I know there are times you can't take a break or eat a meal sitting down. Or go pee by yourself.
My confidence in her is completey shaken now. If the complaining wasn't that often, I could brush this off easily. But it's so frequent....and it's not a recent slump, she's been posting like this since October (just recently "friended" me), and complaining more and more regularly.
Why do I stay? She's one of the very few in my area that I can actually afford. But I think it may be time to think about moving on. I just want my lil guy to be loved during the day.
Garh!
OK...here is your issue. Daycare providers who charge less then the going rate always end up stressed. This is a hard (yet rewarding) field and if you aren't being paid appropriately, it just ends up with one burnt out provider. Thanks everyone.
The whole situation just stinks, and those of you who hate fb - I do too! It always seems to cause problems. Too bad it's so addictive ;P
So trying to be super nice and to see if she could post something positive about her day, we brought her a coffee this morning. So far no updates, but I'm waiting for it, whether it be good or bad. We also only bring my child 4 days a week, and she gets paid for a full week. That's a nice bonus right there, right?
I know kids aren't easy to work with all day - I have a 6 year old and a 3 year old (granted it's not a houseful, but I do know where you are coming from). I know it's hard...when I'm not at work, I'm on the job as mom. I know there are times you can't take a break or eat a meal sitting down. Or go pee by yourself.
My confidence in her is completey shaken now. If the complaining wasn't that often, I could brush this off easily. But it's so frequent....and it's not a recent slump, she's been posting like this since October (just recently "friended" me), and complaining more and more regularly.
Why do I stay? She's one of the very few in my area that I can actually afford. But I think it may be time to think about moving on. I just want my lil guy to be loved during the day.
Garh!
What she should do is raise her rates so that they are comparable; that way she will feel adquately rewarded for her efforts and won't be so quick to complain.
JenNJ 02:02 PM 06-17-2011
I am going against the grain here and give it to you straight - find a new provider. If she is knowingly friends with you on FB and still cannot control her grumbling, she is really unhappy and in need of a new job. There are too many great providers out there to stay with anyone who makes you uncomfortable or unhappy.
I know I take it to the extreme in that I NEVER post about anything work related, BC I find it unprofessional no matter what job you have. But in this job, it is not only unprofessional but hurtful to the families of the little ones. She should find a new outlet for her venting that does not include her clients.
If I was her client, I would find a new provider and give notice.
I know I take it to the extreme in that I NEVER post about anything work related, BC I find it unprofessional no matter what job you have. But in this job, it is not only unprofessional but hurtful to the families of the little ones. She should find a new outlet for her venting that does not include her clients.
If I was her client, I would find a new provider and give notice.
youretooloud 02:45 PM 06-17-2011
If it makes you feel any better at all, I am going to be a lot more cautious when I talk about the job on facebook from now on. Even if I'm joking, it could come across as grumbling.
So, while it doesn't help YOU, it's been enlightening to me.
So, while it doesn't help YOU, it's been enlightening to me.
Unregistered 02:58 PM 06-17-2011
Shes complaining tonight that the downside of running an in home daycare is that her one year old is going to other kids and grabbing toys and saying "mine" and she doesn't think a one year old should know that. WTF, man. They're kids, they do that. They pick up on stuff that other kids do.
I'm so close to going off on her right now! Grrr!
I'm so close to going off on her right now! Grrr!
youretooloud 03:08 PM 06-17-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Shes complaining tonight that the downside of running an in home daycare is that her one year old is going to other kids and grabbing toys and saying "mine" and she doesn't think a one year old should know that. WTF, man. They're kids, they do that. They pick up on stuff that other kids do.
I'm so close to going off on her right now! Grrr!
It does sound sortof extreme. Your kids are probably fine, but perhaps it wouldn't hurt to look around for someone else. Just call around, or look at websites to see if you get a better feel anywhere else.Shes complaining tonight that the downside of running an in home daycare is that her one year old is going to other kids and grabbing toys and saying "mine" and she doesn't think a one year old should know that. WTF, man. They're kids, they do that. They pick up on stuff that other kids do.
I'm so close to going off on her right now! Grrr!
You could also talk to her... but, honestly, it's good to see what she's really thinking too.
morgan24 03:18 PM 06-17-2011
I don't think that facebook is the place to vent about the children you are caring for. I wouldn't take any chances, I would find a new provider.
cheerfuldom 03:46 PM 06-17-2011
She sounds like someone who is just really unprepared to take care of a group of kids. The fact that she is complaining that her 1 year old says "mine" shows that she probably has little to no experience with that age. EVERY kid does that especially in a group dynamic. I am guessing that she is a little over her head with this daycare or like others said, just a big complainer.
Unregistered 03:49 PM 06-17-2011
Thank you, you guys are great! I really appreciate all the responses you've given me!!
This is a train wreck...I can't help but wait and watch and she what she says next.
So I think it's time to seriously start looking (not that I haven't been over the last few days) for a new provider. this rubs me in all the wrong ways. I get it, your kid is perfect and all the others are just a pain in your butt.
This is a train wreck...I can't help but wait and watch and she what she says next.
So I think it's time to seriously start looking (not that I haven't been over the last few days) for a new provider. this rubs me in all the wrong ways. I get it, your kid is perfect and all the others are just a pain in your butt.
PeanutsGalore 04:01 PM 06-17-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Shes complaining tonight that the downside of running an in home daycare is that her one year old is going to other kids and grabbing toys and saying "mine" and she doesn't think a one year old should know that. WTF, man. They're kids, they do that. They pick up on stuff that other kids do.
I'm so close to going off on her right now! Grrr!
I'm with Cheerfuldom on this one...she's in over her head. Reality check: kids will start the "MINE!" thing even if they live in a bubble.Shes complaining tonight that the downside of running an in home daycare is that her one year old is going to other kids and grabbing toys and saying "mine" and she doesn't think a one year old should know that. WTF, man. They're kids, they do that. They pick up on stuff that other kids do.
I'm so close to going off on her right now! Grrr!
If this is the only issue and you're otherwise comfortable with the care, I'd have a heart to heart with her. Really. Otherwise, look elsewhere, because she's got some growing to do.
lulu 04:16 PM 06-17-2011
I've been on here so much I figured I better register! 
Thanks again!
Thanks again!
youretooloud 04:17 PM 06-17-2011
Keep in mind though. Whatever you decide to do, understand that we ALL complain. But, we do it on a place like this where other providers can give us a reality check. Or sympathy... whatever the situation needs.
In her recent public ranting, she'd say that here, and we'd nicely point out that her 1 yr old is in a normal developmental phase, and isn't destined to sit in the principal's office the rest of her childhood. She will indeed move on to another phase that is preprogrammed in her.
What she might really need is a place to vent. We all need a place to vent. Otherwise, we'd be very unhappy, and we'd get walked all over by the parents.
Maybe you could have this thread deleted, then send her a facebook message to invite her to this board. OR, give us her info, and we'll invite her. I know that I became a much happier person when I discovered the internet and online venting.
In her recent public ranting, she'd say that here, and we'd nicely point out that her 1 yr old is in a normal developmental phase, and isn't destined to sit in the principal's office the rest of her childhood. She will indeed move on to another phase that is preprogrammed in her.
What she might really need is a place to vent. We all need a place to vent. Otherwise, we'd be very unhappy, and we'd get walked all over by the parents.
Maybe you could have this thread deleted, then send her a facebook message to invite her to this board. OR, give us her info, and we'll invite her. I know that I became a much happier person when I discovered the internet and online venting.
littlemissmuffet 06:36 PM 06-17-2011
Wow. I'd have been gone YESTERDAY!
As a PP mentioned, someone who thinks it's unusual for a one year old to say "mine" to any toy, piece of furniture, piece of food, room, piece of clothing, ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING IN A HOUSE... is absolutely inexperienced with young children. I hear the kids say "mine" about eight thousand times a day in this house - and I assure you, nothing in this house is anybody's but MINE!
She's inexperienced, and exhibiting favoritism for her own child directly to her clients. That is terribly worrisome to me.
Updating Facebook statuses while I am paying you to be interacting with and caring for my child... I don't think so.
Venting on Facebook about needing freedom... she feels trapped. She probably thought taking in some kids for cash would be easy while she's home with her own little one and she's quickly finding out the reality of how INVOLVED and ATTENTIVE this job requires one to be. It's probably much more than she anticipated, and she's already burning out. She probably wants the money, but doesn't want to earn it.
Does she ever post positives?
I LOVE my job, I LOVE my dcks and everyone on my Facebook knows it via my statuses. I don't have any parents on my Facebook, for the record, so I am posting genuinely. If she can so boldly vent about how much she seemingly dislikes (perhaps even HATES) her work, your child is better off as far away as possible. Trust me. Give your notice. NOW.
I agree with the PPs who suggested that a thank you goes a long way, it certaintly does, but seriously, we do this for the kids... at least I do. The kids give me enough thanks. Being able to be home is enough thanks. You know? This chick sounds like she got into this biz for all the wrong reasons and your children will be the ones who pay for it... the best thing you can do for them is pay for a better daycare where you TRUST a HAPPY provider.
We all have hard days... but hers seem more frequent than is "normal" - that's indication right there that something is wrong.
As a PP mentioned, someone who thinks it's unusual for a one year old to say "mine" to any toy, piece of furniture, piece of food, room, piece of clothing, ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING IN A HOUSE... is absolutely inexperienced with young children. I hear the kids say "mine" about eight thousand times a day in this house - and I assure you, nothing in this house is anybody's but MINE!
She's inexperienced, and exhibiting favoritism for her own child directly to her clients. That is terribly worrisome to me.
Updating Facebook statuses while I am paying you to be interacting with and caring for my child...
I don't think so.Venting on Facebook about needing freedom... she feels trapped. She probably thought taking in some kids for cash would be easy while she's home with her own little one and she's quickly finding out the reality of how INVOLVED and ATTENTIVE this job requires one to be. It's probably much more than she anticipated, and she's already burning out. She probably wants the money, but doesn't want to earn it.
Does she ever post positives?
I LOVE my job, I LOVE my dcks and everyone on my Facebook knows it via my statuses. I don't have any parents on my Facebook, for the record, so I am posting genuinely. If she can so boldly vent about how much she seemingly dislikes (perhaps even HATES) her work, your child is better off as far away as possible. Trust me. Give your notice. NOW.
I agree with the PPs who suggested that a thank you goes a long way, it certaintly does, but seriously, we do this for the kids... at least I do. The kids give me enough thanks. Being able to be home is enough thanks. You know? This chick sounds like she got into this biz for all the wrong reasons and your children will be the ones who pay for it... the best thing you can do for them is pay for a better daycare where you TRUST a HAPPY provider.
We all have hard days... but hers seem more frequent than is "normal" - that's indication right there that something is wrong.
kimmi 05:21 PM 06-19-2011
One of my parents just friended me on facebook. I have been watching her son for about 2 years now. So today im going through all her pictures of the kids and come across one that was taken last summer. Her son was at daycare (my house) and was running down the sidewalk and tripped and fell flat on his face. One side of his face was all scraped up and she took a pic of it and put it on her facebook and said "dcb met the sidewalk at daycare today =(" and then i was reading the comments and all but one was like ohh poor baby. He will be okay mom, and comments like that. But one guy said "you shouldve made the daycare ladies face meet the pavement! WOW, that hurt my feelings! It wasnt my fault he fell running, he was 3 at the time =(
Unregistered 10:27 AM 06-20-2011
Originally Posted by kimmi:
One of my parents just friended me on facebook. I have been watching her son for about 2 years now. So today im going through all her pictures of the kids and come across one that was taken last summer. Her son was at daycare (my house) and was running down the sidewalk and tripped and fell flat on his face. One side of his face was all scraped up and she took a pic of it and put it on her facebook and said "dcb met the sidewalk at daycare today =(" and then i was reading the comments and all but one was like ohh poor baby. He will be okay mom, and comments like that. But one guy said "you shouldve made the daycare ladies face meet the pavement! WOW, that hurt my feelings! It wasnt my fault he fell running, he was 3 at the time =(
That is sad One of my parents just friended me on facebook. I have been watching her son for about 2 years now. So today im going through all her pictures of the kids and come across one that was taken last summer. Her son was at daycare (my house) and was running down the sidewalk and tripped and fell flat on his face. One side of his face was all scraped up and she took a pic of it and put it on her facebook and said "dcb met the sidewalk at daycare today =(" and then i was reading the comments and all but one was like ohh poor baby. He will be okay mom, and comments like that. But one guy said "you shouldve made the daycare ladies face meet the pavement! WOW, that hurt my feelings! It wasnt my fault he fell running, he was 3 at the time =(
I think that I would be feeling the way that you felt too. This is why I make it a point not to have clients as friends because of the chance that something like that were to happen. Accidents happen and even though we are watching the kids closely, they still have accidents. As far as the guy making the comment about making the daycare lady's face meet the pavement...some people are just ignorant and make comments that make them sound like cavemen. Still, I'd have hurt feelings too.
Mom_of_two 12:12 PM 06-20-2011
I would not be comfortable with that provider. Agree with pp's!!
I am friends on Facebook with two out of three of my families. I enjoy it, because it is nice for them to see more of my world, and for me to get to know them better as well. I do not 'friend' families myself, but if one brings it up I encourage them to find me. Some people may not Want a more friendly relationship with me, and that is totally ok, too!! Their choice, so I never initiate.
I do not talk about work at all, EVER on FB!!! Except maybe to say 'great day with the kids' or 'lots of fun outside today' or share pics of my Own kids (never share other people's kids pics.)
We all have bad days at work. It is not appropriate to vent to clients. Plus, sounds like there are other issues altogether going on as well. Good luck.
I am friends on Facebook with two out of three of my families. I enjoy it, because it is nice for them to see more of my world, and for me to get to know them better as well. I do not 'friend' families myself, but if one brings it up I encourage them to find me. Some people may not Want a more friendly relationship with me, and that is totally ok, too!! Their choice, so I never initiate.
I do not talk about work at all, EVER on FB!!! Except maybe to say 'great day with the kids' or 'lots of fun outside today' or share pics of my Own kids (never share other people's kids pics.)
We all have bad days at work. It is not appropriate to vent to clients. Plus, sounds like there are other issues altogether going on as well. Good luck.
LittleD 03:17 PM 06-20-2011
Some people just need SOMETHING to complain about. I have a fb friend like that. Everyday is a new rant. I'll call and ask if everything is ok, and she says "yes, why wouldn't it be?"
Unregistered 09:11 AM 06-21-2011
test...I've tried posting several times logged in, but my posts aren't showing. ?? Are they stuck in moderator land?
Unregistered 11:24 AM 06-21-2011
Okay, so I guess I can't post when I'm looged in. Anywho.....
I responded (nicely) to her "mine" update saying with til she gets older and brings home all sorts of great words and stories from school. She's in for a surprise then!
I think littlemissmuffet hit the nail right on the head. I rarely hear anything positive, aside from how super awesome/smart/cute/brilliant her kid is. I'd love to see something like "took a nice walk with the kids" once in a while, you know?
As much as we don't want to move him, we think it's time to start looking for another provider. Which is sad. She should know better than to post stuff like that on fb.
I responded (nicely) to her "mine" update saying with til she gets older and brings home all sorts of great words and stories from school. She's in for a surprise then!
I think littlemissmuffet hit the nail right on the head. I rarely hear anything positive, aside from how super awesome/smart/cute/brilliant her kid is. I'd love to see something like "took a nice walk with the kids" once in a while, you know?
As much as we don't want to move him, we think it's time to start looking for another provider. Which is sad. She should know better than to post stuff like that on fb.
greenhouse 09:44 AM 06-22-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Thanks for your replies!
I totally understand that everyone needs to vent...I do, you do, we all do! But there is a time and a place and certain people to do it with. She should have made a seperate account for work and one for freinds where she can complain away and none of us would know...
She never names names, but she's always complaining about it being Monday, how she needs more long weekends, vacations, "Hopeless" dreams of a day off, and this is a beauty: "Wish there was one day where I didn't have to listen to a child cry and scream for what seems like hours!! Ahhhh- I need a day off!!"
I mean, come on!
#1 she shouldn't have friended you. #2 being a day care provider, or even just a mom of young kids can be overwhelming. I don't see anything too heinous about wishing for more vacation. If she was saying "I hate these little brats!!" then that is different. Is the care excellent? Does she seem overtaxed in person? Don't read too much into FB vents about being tired from watching small children for 10 hours a day. If the tone of the posts gets hateful or something like that then I would worry. Still can't believe she would friend a client. That's totally asking for trouble. GL.Thanks for your replies!
I totally understand that everyone needs to vent...I do, you do, we all do! But there is a time and a place and certain people to do it with. She should have made a seperate account for work and one for freinds where she can complain away and none of us would know...
She never names names, but she's always complaining about it being Monday, how she needs more long weekends, vacations, "Hopeless" dreams of a day off, and this is a beauty: "Wish there was one day where I didn't have to listen to a child cry and scream for what seems like hours!! Ahhhh- I need a day off!!"
I mean, come on!
Unregistered 10:51 AM 06-22-2011
She just came back from a few days off (Monday & Tuesday) and today she posted that she's already in need of another vacation. C'mon, she's been back a few hours and she's already whining. It just makes me think she does not like her job!!!
The care is okay, but she doesn't come close to the level of care he got with his old provider (she had to close to care for her elderly MIL).
I saw today she has a seperate fb account for her daycare. She just doesnt use it.
The care is okay, but she doesn't come close to the level of care he got with his old provider (she had to close to care for her elderly MIL).
I saw today she has a seperate fb account for her daycare. She just doesnt use it.
Blackcat31 10:58 AM 06-22-2011
Personally, I would find alternate care and then explain exactly why you are leaving so she understands that although the job may be stressful and difficult at times, posting (ie whining, complaining and/or bitching) on facebook is completely unprofessional. You leaving and pointing out why may help future families she enrolls. Good luck!
jen 11:25 AM 06-22-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
She just came back from a few days off (Monday & Tuesday) and today she posted that she's already in need of another vacation. C'mon, she's been back a few hours and she's already whining. It just makes me think she does not like her job!!!
The care is okay, but she doesn't come close to the level of care he got with his old provider (she had to close to care for her elderly MIL).
I saw today she has a seperate fb account for her daycare. She just doesnt use it.
We can (and did) offer you lots of advice and support. She just came back from a few days off (Monday & Tuesday) and today she posted that she's already in need of another vacation. C'mon, she's been back a few hours and she's already whining. It just makes me think she does not like her job!!!
The care is okay, but she doesn't come close to the level of care he got with his old provider (she had to close to care for her elderly MIL).
I saw today she has a seperate fb account for her daycare. She just doesnt use it.
At this point, you are doing EXACTLY what she is doing...just complaining without doing anything. If she is unhappy doing daycare, she should either address the problems that are making her unhappy or quit. If you are unhappy with your provider, you should address the problems or move on.
Unregistered 11:35 AM 06-22-2011
I have a list of approx 50 providers I am sifting through, which I started gathering last week, so yes I am doing something about it. I just came on to give out an update since I had so many responses to my original post.
Unregistered 05:50 PM 06-22-2011
And jen, I think you should also understand that making the decision to move my son is not one to be taken lightly. Or the decision to confront her, which I would have to think would not end well. I didn't think I was coming off as complaining in my posts, I was merely trying to tell everyone what was going on. I literally have been dumbfounded by what she has been saying and I thought this was the place to share it. I have expressed my appreciation for all of the replies in almost every post I have made. Hearing all the different POV's has been great, coming from the providers themselves. I'm glad to hear most of you would not tolerate that kind of unprofessionalism.
littlemissmuffet 08:39 PM 06-22-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
And jen, I think you should also understand that making the decision to move my son is not one to be taken lightly. Or the decision to confront her, which I would have to think would not end well. I didn't think I was coming off as complaining in my posts, I was merely trying to tell everyone what was going on. I literally have been dumbfounded by what she has been saying and I thought this was the place to share it. I have expressed my appreciation for all of the replies in almost every post I have made. Hearing all the different POV's has been great, coming from the providers themselves. I'm glad to hear most of you would not tolerate that kind of unprofessionalism.
This IS the place to come and share these things! Don't let anyone scare you off. And jen, I think you should also understand that making the decision to move my son is not one to be taken lightly. Or the decision to confront her, which I would have to think would not end well. I didn't think I was coming off as complaining in my posts, I was merely trying to tell everyone what was going on. I literally have been dumbfounded by what she has been saying and I thought this was the place to share it. I have expressed my appreciation for all of the replies in almost every post I have made. Hearing all the different POV's has been great, coming from the providers themselves. I'm glad to hear most of you would not tolerate that kind of unprofessionalism.
I am glad you came back with updates... lots of people post their situation and ask advice or for some input then we never hear back on the outcome or end result. I think also that these types of topics will help other providers who are making the same mistakes - seeing things from a parent's perspective!
I hope that you find the right person to care for your son! Let us know.
CheekyChick 04:01 AM 06-23-2011
Call me paranoid, but her being so blatant about her being unhappy in her job is a HUGE red flag. Unfriending her doesn't solve the problem - it just hides it from your eyes. I would address this issue with her immediately. If she doesn't have a good excuse for her behavior - find another provider.
MyAngels 04:26 AM 06-23-2011
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
This IS the place to come and share these things! Don't let anyone scare you off.
I am glad you came back with updates... lots of people post their situation and ask advice or for some input then we never hear back on the outcome or end result. I think also that these types of topics will help other providers who are making the same mistakes - seeing things from a parent's perspective!
I hope that you find the right person to care for your son! Let us know.
I agree with this This IS the place to come and share these things! Don't let anyone scare you off.
I am glad you came back with updates... lots of people post their situation and ask advice or for some input then we never hear back on the outcome or end result. I think also that these types of topics will help other providers who are making the same mistakes - seeing things from a parent's perspective!
I hope that you find the right person to care for your son! Let us know.
.It's not easy finding a new provider, but this experience will help you find someone perfect for your family. Good luck!
Unregistered 06:17 AM 06-23-2011
Thanks guys!
This is definitely not an easy situation to deal with, but I think it's in our sons best interest to move him...and will give us peace of mind that he is being loved during the day.
I have a couple leads on some new providers, so hopefully one of them will work out. I'll keep you posted!
This is definitely not an easy situation to deal with, but I think it's in our sons best interest to move him...and will give us peace of mind that he is being loved during the day.
I have a couple leads on some new providers, so hopefully one of them will work out. I'll keep you posted!
Cat Herder 07:11 AM 06-23-2011
Originally Posted by littlemissmuffet:
This IS the place to come and share these things! Don't let anyone scare you off.
I am glad you came back with updates... lots of people post their situation and ask advice or for some input then we never hear back on the outcome or end result. I think also that these types of topics will help other providers who are making the same mistakes - seeing things from a parent's perspective!
I hope that you find the right person to care for your son! Let us know.
I don't think Jen was trying to scare her off. I think she was telling her the truth. First she offered support/sympathy, now she wants Mom to step up with a plan. This IS the place to come and share these things! Don't let anyone scare you off.
I am glad you came back with updates... lots of people post their situation and ask advice or for some input then we never hear back on the outcome or end result. I think also that these types of topics will help other providers who are making the same mistakes - seeing things from a parent's perspective!
I hope that you find the right person to care for your son! Let us know.
It is not her style to be mean...she is one smart cookie who has a gift for seeing through the clutter to see the issue at hand.
I like her posts very much for that reason. IMHO, THAT is what we are here for...EMPOWERMENT, not to enable the bad patterns to continue, YKWIM?
Sometimes we need a pat on the head; sometimes we need a foot to the arse....
Unregistered 08:02 AM 06-23-2011
And I can appreciate that...but was I expected to find a new provider in 24 hours or something? I posted looking for opinions Thursday afternoon, new provider Friday? Again, this was a huge decision to make, weighing all the pros and cons of the situation. Confront/not confront, ignore it/move on, etc. I don't know if you have ever had to interview DCP's before, but it's INCREDIBLY hard to find someone that you trust 100% to essentially be 'mom' while you're gone all day at work (insert working mom's guilt here). There's some skeevy people out there!!
I honestly do appreciate all of the responses! Hearing the DCP point of view has been very helpful in making a decision.
I honestly do appreciate all of the responses! Hearing the DCP point of view has been very helpful in making a decision.
jen 09:09 AM 06-23-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
I don't think Jen was trying to scare her off. I think she was telling her the truth. First she offered support/sympathy, now she wants Mom to step up with a plan.
It is not her style to be mean...she is one smart cookie who has a gift for seeing through the clutter to see the issue at hand. I like her posts very much for that reason.
IMHO, THAT is what we are here for...EMPOWERMENT, not to enable the bad patterns to continue, YKWIM?
Sometimes we need a pat on the head; sometimes we need a foot to the arse....
Thank you!! I really wasn't trying to scare her off! You just get "it"! I don't think Jen was trying to scare her off. I think she was telling her the truth. First she offered support/sympathy, now she wants Mom to step up with a plan.
It is not her style to be mean...she is one smart cookie who has a gift for seeing through the clutter to see the issue at hand.
I like her posts very much for that reason. IMHO, THAT is what we are here for...EMPOWERMENT, not to enable the bad patterns to continue, YKWIM?
Sometimes we need a pat on the head; sometimes we need a foot to the arse....
I happen to be a huge fan of yours, you know!
Cat Herder 09:26 AM 06-23-2011
Originally Posted by jen:
Thank you!! I really wasn't trying to scare her off! You just get "it"!
I happen to be a huge fan of yours, you know!
Well Thank You!! Thank you!! I really wasn't trying to scare her off! You just get "it"!
I happen to be a huge fan of yours, you know!
Even when I am overly literal or the days I have too much caffeine and am a smart alec??!!!
We do have a great group here...
MyAngels 09:31 AM 06-23-2011
I feel a group hug coming on...
Cat Herder 09:48 AM 06-23-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
And I can appreciate that...but was I expected to find a new provider in 24 hours or something? I posted looking for opinions Thursday afternoon, new provider Friday? Again, this was a huge decision to make, weighing all the pros and cons of the situation. Confront/not confront, ignore it/move on, etc. I don't know if you have ever had to interview DCP's before, but it's INCREDIBLY hard to find someone that you trust 100% to essentially be 'mom' while you're gone all day at work (insert working mom's guilt here). There's some skeevy people out there!!
I honestly do appreciate all of the responses! Hearing the DCP point of view has been very helpful in making a decision.
I don't think I saw anything stating that you had decided to pull him, 100%, until after Jen said that.And I can appreciate that...but was I expected to find a new provider in 24 hours or something? I posted looking for opinions Thursday afternoon, new provider Friday? Again, this was a huge decision to make, weighing all the pros and cons of the situation. Confront/not confront, ignore it/move on, etc. I don't know if you have ever had to interview DCP's before, but it's INCREDIBLY hard to find someone that you trust 100% to essentially be 'mom' while you're gone all day at work (insert working mom's guilt here). There's some skeevy people out there!!
I honestly do appreciate all of the responses! Hearing the DCP point of view has been very helpful in making a decision.
Maybe I missed it as well? If so I am so sorry. I really appreciate hearing a parents view as well. I wish many more would register and stick around.
I did interview with providers in the past and yeah it was awful (I am a PITA Mom). You have an opportunity here that you may not see. If you register you can private message providers here and get some honest help finding a good one in your area...
Who knows each others reputations or habits better??? We could all learn from one another. YKWIM? Please stick around.
Cat Herder 09:48 AM 06-23-2011
Originally Posted by MyAngels:
I feel a group hug coming on...
If women could come together to build each other up we could rule the world.....I feel a group hug coming on...
jen 09:58 AM 06-23-2011
I think I feel a song coming on...I'm just not sure if it's the Lion King...
"Can you feel the love tonight..." OR Michael Jackson...
"We are the world, we are the ones who make a brighter day..."
"Can you feel the love tonight..." OR Michael Jackson...
"We are the world, we are the ones who make a brighter day..."
jen 09:59 AM 06-23-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
Well Thank You!!
Even when I am overly literal or the days I have too much caffeine and am a smart alec??!!!
We do have a great group here...
ESPECIALLY then!Well Thank You!!
Even when I am overly literal or the days I have too much caffeine and am a smart alec??!!!
We do have a great group here...
MyAngels 10:44 AM 06-23-2011
Originally Posted by Catherder:
If women could come together to build each other up we could rule the world.....
Agreed - I have already convinced my entire family that I do, in fact, rule the world If women could come together to build each other up we could rule the world.....
. I'm just trying to figure out how I can expand my "kingdom" to the rest of the world .
Blackcat31 10:53 AM 06-23-2011
"They say that man is mighty;
He governs land and sea,
He wields a mighty scepter
O'er lesser powers that be.
But a mightier power and stronger
man from his throne has hurled
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world."
~ William Ross Wallace
He governs land and sea,
He wields a mighty scepter
O'er lesser powers that be.
But a mightier power and stronger
man from his throne has hurled
For the hand that rocks the cradle
Is the hand that rules the world."
~ William Ross Wallace
Unregistered 11:28 AM 06-23-2011
I'm sorry if I didn't say for sure that I was going to pull him...jeez, maybe I didn't....both my head & heart are seriously pulled in about 5 different directions trying to figure out what is best for him. We're looking for new providers...I'm trying to figure out if we could afford me being at SAHM...could I get a part time job instead...if I could just not ever sleep, I could work 3rd shift and be home with him all day. And mop the floors and get all the laundry done, too. Problem solved, and my house will be squeaky clean! :P
You guys are a great group! It's nice that you have this forum to share bits of your day and to get the support and help of others in your shoes!
To ask an OT question...have you guys found that being a DCP has been (like parenthood) "the toughest job you've ever loved"? If you had a chance to do it all over, would you choose this as your career again?
You guys are a great group! It's nice that you have this forum to share bits of your day and to get the support and help of others in your shoes!
To ask an OT question...have you guys found that being a DCP has been (like parenthood) "the toughest job you've ever loved"? If you had a chance to do it all over, would you choose this as your career again?
lulu 11:35 AM 06-23-2011
Oooh! I can post when I'm logged in again!
Yay! Haha - it's the little things that make me happy.
Yay! Haha - it's the little things that make me happy.
Cat Herder 02:38 PM 06-23-2011
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
To ask an OT question...have you guys found that being a DCP has been (like parenthood) "the toughest job you've ever loved"? If you had a chance to do it all over, would you choose this as your career again?
I would. To ask an OT question...have you guys found that being a DCP has been (like parenthood) "the toughest job you've ever loved"? If you had a chance to do it all over, would you choose this as your career again?
It is the only job that allows me to: 1. Be with my kids before and after school while still meeting my financial obligations.
2. Have a quiet lunch with my husband on his 2-3 days off per week (24/72 hour schedule), while our kids are in school. (Naptime)
3. Have 100% family time on weekends (and nights) since all the housework and laundry is done during the week.
4. Be free of downsizing or forced overtime (up to 72 hours straight at times). No fuel, uniform or shift meal costs. Sleep in my own bed at night.
5. Be home for emergency weather school closings. Not have to get my kids out or find emergency care (my other job is mandatory attendance).
6. Be able to care for elderly parents during bed rest/rehab periods.
7. Be able to make my own schedule, rules and payscale.
I am sure I could think of a million other things if I had enough time. For me it is the ONLY way I could be the wife, mother, sister and daughter I set out to be.
Country Kids 04:14 PM 06-23-2011
I would do it again but only while my children were little. It hasn't worked that well not that they are older at least not this year. The last 2-3 years I was able to do preschool only in the mornings and have afternoons off! I actually worked my childrens school schedules and it was fabulous. Well with the economy I have had to go back to full time and I am absolutely grateful I was able to get full time children but my own children/husband/my health are really suffering from it. I'm actually thinking of working in the schools so that I can be with my own children more on their days off/summer and not feel the guilt of not being able to spend time with them or do things with them. I don't have a helper anymore-due to health reason on her part I had to let her go and she had been her 12 years so I really have a hard time allowing someone else in my home when I'm not here.
It is a great career and I have had great parents! My whole life though I have always wanted to be a wife and SAHM and that only. I am very happy when I have been able to do that and find myself very overwhelmed trying to work full-time, be a wife, mom, etc. My husband had even noticed the difference in me. So hats off to those who are able to find the balance in it but I never have. I would love to hear from those who have and how they have done it.
It is a great career and I have had great parents! My whole life though I have always wanted to be a wife and SAHM and that only. I am very happy when I have been able to do that and find myself very overwhelmed trying to work full-time, be a wife, mom, etc. My husband had even noticed the difference in me. So hats off to those who are able to find the balance in it but I never have. I would love to hear from those who have and how they have done it.
Unregistered 06:05 PM 06-24-2011
Don't confront....
Do listen to your instincts, but also realize that ignorance isn't bliss. You may know a lot less about how your new provider really feels.
Do ask how's it going Every Day.
Do ask if there is anything she needs and offer to help in any way.
Do keep your ears and eyes open and talk to your kiddo about their day.
Do look for a new spot, but also be realistic about the fact that you have a good view of this one. Are there any other issues, really?
I have totally dodged a few DCPs for their FB profiles.
Do listen to your instincts, but also realize that ignorance isn't bliss. You may know a lot less about how your new provider really feels.
Do ask how's it going Every Day.
Do ask if there is anything she needs and offer to help in any way.
Do keep your ears and eyes open and talk to your kiddo about their day.
Do look for a new spot, but also be realistic about the fact that you have a good view of this one. Are there any other issues, really?
I have totally dodged a few DCPs for their FB profiles.
Unregistered 07:20 PM 05-06-2013
What was the outcome of your situation???
Patches 09:31 PM 05-06-2013
2011! Really?!