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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Sad Sight At Dinner Tonight
sharlan 07:18 PM 09-09-2011
We took the two granddaughters out to dinner tonight.
Young couple with 2 kids sat next to us. Boy was about 5, girl about 7. The boy sat with his back to his dad and played with his video game thingy (DS?). Every so often, the dad would reach over and stick a bite of mac & cheese into his mouth, same with the soda. The kid never took a single bite of food or drink by himself, never said a word to anyone. The girl laid down on the bench seat, playing with her game. The mom would stick a bite of food or drink into her mouth every so often. The mom did speak to the girl a few times, but she never sat up or took a bite of food on her own. Every so often, the parents would pull out their cell phones and check their e-mails (I could see Dad's).
Another family comes in with 3 young teen girls, father immediately sets up his iPad on the table and starts playing his game. If anyone talked to him, he'd shake his head or grunt. The girls talked back and forth, but spent a lot of time texting on their phones.
Similar sights at other tables.
What in the world ever happened to FAMILY dinner time?
Young couple with 2 kids sat next to us. Boy was about 5, girl about 7. The boy sat with his back to his dad and played with his video game thingy (DS?). Every so often, the dad would reach over and stick a bite of mac & cheese into his mouth, same with the soda. The kid never took a single bite of food or drink by himself, never said a word to anyone. The girl laid down on the bench seat, playing with her game. The mom would stick a bite of food or drink into her mouth every so often. The mom did speak to the girl a few times, but she never sat up or took a bite of food on her own. Every so often, the parents would pull out their cell phones and check their e-mails (I could see Dad's).
Another family comes in with 3 young teen girls, father immediately sets up his iPad on the table and starts playing his game. If anyone talked to him, he'd shake his head or grunt. The girls talked back and forth, but spent a lot of time texting on their phones.
Similar sights at other tables.
What in the world ever happened to FAMILY dinner time?
nannyde 07:27 PM 09-09-2011
Yup
Distracted kids with distracted parents.
It's very sad.
Distracted kids with distracted parents.
It's very sad.
GG~DAYCARE 07:37 PM 09-09-2011
Family dinner starts at home!!! If its not done at home no one knows how to react when out to dinner!!
sharlan 07:38 PM 09-09-2011
I may not have been the perfect parent, but there was nothing at the table besides us. I don't allow any toys at the table. My eldest granddaughter knows better than to bring any type of electronic into a restaurant. I even leave my cell out in the car.
Crazy8 07:39 PM 09-09-2011
That is ridiculous!! I guess you could say we are a techie family - we have ds's, ipod touches, iphones, cell phones, kindles, laptops, etc. (and I want an ipad for xmas, LOL) but we would NEVER allow them at the dinner table or anywhere where interaction with other people should be a priority. I know some people are against them entirely, I am not one of those people but yeah, what you saw tonight is just ridiculous.
And my kids have recited the "no toys at the table" rule long before those toys were of the electronic kind. LOL! If my little one comes to the table with a little figure in hand my other two are sooo quick to say "no toys at the table".
And my kids have recited the "no toys at the table" rule long before those toys were of the electronic kind. LOL! If my little one comes to the table with a little figure in hand my other two are sooo quick to say "no toys at the table".
sharlan 07:55 PM 09-09-2011
My 15 yo granddaughter has all that electronic stuff, too - lap top, mini notebook, iPad, droid cell phone, DS, PSP, gameboy, iPod, etc. BUT she knows better than to bring any of it into a restaurant or the dinner table. She knows it will find it's way into Grandma's safe.
I am not tech savy, don't have any of that, cell phone only, but I'm not against them. There is a time and place for everything and the FAMILY dinner table is not it.
I am not tech savy, don't have any of that, cell phone only, but I'm not against them. There is a time and place for everything and the FAMILY dinner table is not it.
Kaddidle Care 10:04 PM 09-09-2011
Originally Posted by sharlan:
We took the two granddaughters out to dinner tonight.
Young couple with 2 kids sat next to us. Boy was about 5, girl about 7. The boy sat with his back to his dad and played with his video game thingy (DS?). Every so often, the dad would reach over and stick a bite of mac & cheese into his mouth, same with the soda. The kid never took a single bite of food or drink by himself, never said a word to anyone. The girl laid down on the bench seat, playing with her game. The mom would stick a bite of food or drink into her mouth every so often. The mom did speak to the girl a few times, but she never sat up or took a bite of food on her own. Every so often, the parents would pull out their cell phones and check their e-mails (I could see Dad's).
Another family comes in with 3 young teen girls, father immediately sets up his iPad on the table and starts playing his game. If anyone talked to him, he'd shake his head or grunt. The girls talked back and forth, but spent a lot of time texting on their phones.
Similar sights at other tables.
What in the world ever happened to FAMILY dinner time?
Well.. at least nobody was disturbing your dinner. I halfway expected this to be a post about dinner out and the children misbehaving running about the restaurant, etc.We took the two granddaughters out to dinner tonight.
Young couple with 2 kids sat next to us. Boy was about 5, girl about 7. The boy sat with his back to his dad and played with his video game thingy (DS?). Every so often, the dad would reach over and stick a bite of mac & cheese into his mouth, same with the soda. The kid never took a single bite of food or drink by himself, never said a word to anyone. The girl laid down on the bench seat, playing with her game. The mom would stick a bite of food or drink into her mouth every so often. The mom did speak to the girl a few times, but she never sat up or took a bite of food on her own. Every so often, the parents would pull out their cell phones and check their e-mails (I could see Dad's).
Another family comes in with 3 young teen girls, father immediately sets up his iPad on the table and starts playing his game. If anyone talked to him, he'd shake his head or grunt. The girls talked back and forth, but spent a lot of time texting on their phones.
Similar sights at other tables.
What in the world ever happened to FAMILY dinner time?
I'd rather have this going on around me rather than hearing a bunch of screamers at dinner.
That said I've seen groups of teen girls at the mall, walking together yet none are talking to each other. They are all on their phones texting. Crazy world.
melskids 02:16 AM 09-10-2011
i just met up with two guy friends from high school. i have not seen them in 15 years, so i was excited to meet up with them one night at the local diner in the town where we all used to live.
neither one of them took their eyes off of their dang iphones the whole time. i did all the talking and they did all the grunting in response. i know guys dont like to talk, but geesh. i would have thought after 15 years, they'd have something to say to me.
my sister and BIL do it to. whenever they come home to visit, their faces are shoved in their laptops the entire time. drives me crazy!
neither one of them took their eyes off of their dang iphones the whole time. i did all the talking and they did all the grunting in response. i know guys dont like to talk, but geesh. i would have thought after 15 years, they'd have something to say to me.
my sister and BIL do it to. whenever they come home to visit, their faces are shoved in their laptops the entire time. drives me crazy!
safechner 06:32 AM 09-10-2011
I admit that I do focus on my cell phone for doing text or play the games all day at my husband's parents' house for Thanksgiving or Christmas. It was so boring and I don't talk anyone very much. If my girls want to talk to me and I listen and talk to them but not my in laws. I stopped talk to my husband's parents anymore because the way they act forward to my daughter who has PDD-NOS on Autism Spectrum. My husband only want to see his grandmother which is fine with me. I know it is sad but oh well...
iheartkids 06:43 AM 09-10-2011
I will be the first on here to admit we slack in the family meal time. I am guilty of letting my family take their plates into the livingroom to eat. We are also guilty of eatting in front of the computer.
As far as eatting out, we would let DD take her DS to keep her occupied while we waited for our food but once the food came it went into my purse. Now that she is 10 she barely ever takes it and she likes to play the games and such on those little coloring sheets. Often she is crabby about having to go to a restaurant and sit and eat because she is a play outside kind of girl. She hates having to leave her neighbor friends and SIT for dinner. Whenever she complains and whines about going out to eat I tell her "this is the ONLY time I can get us all sitting face to face during dinner...so don't ruin it for me!"
Like I said, I will raise the guilty hand but I am very proud to say my kids are not video game junkies!
As far as eatting out, we would let DD take her DS to keep her occupied while we waited for our food but once the food came it went into my purse. Now that she is 10 she barely ever takes it and she likes to play the games and such on those little coloring sheets. Often she is crabby about having to go to a restaurant and sit and eat because she is a play outside kind of girl. She hates having to leave her neighbor friends and SIT for dinner. Whenever she complains and whines about going out to eat I tell her "this is the ONLY time I can get us all sitting face to face during dinner...so don't ruin it for me!"
Like I said, I will raise the guilty hand but I am very proud to say my kids are not video game junkies!
MyAngels 07:36 AM 09-10-2011
Originally Posted by Kaddidle Care:
That said I've seen groups of teen girls at the mall, walking together yet none are talking to each other. They are all on their phones texting. Crazy world.
Probably texting each other That said I've seen groups of teen girls at the mall, walking together yet none are talking to each other. They are all on their phones texting. Crazy world.
.
Kaddidle Care 09:10 AM 09-10-2011
You're probably right there! 
Michael 03:55 PM 09-10-2011
Originally Posted by melskids:
i just met up with two guy friends from high school. i have not seen them in 15 years, so i was excited to meet up with them one night at the local diner in the town where we all used to live.
neither one of them took their eyes off of their dang iphones the whole time. i did all the talking and they did all the grunting in response. i know guys dont like to talk, but geesh. i would have thought after 15 years, they'd have something to say to me.
my sister and BIL do it to. whenever they come home to visit, their faces are shoved in their laptops the entire time. drives me crazy!
I like my smart phone but I can't believe your make friends did not have more to talk about after 15 years. Are they married to their phones?i just met up with two guy friends from high school. i have not seen them in 15 years, so i was excited to meet up with them one night at the local diner in the town where we all used to live.
neither one of them took their eyes off of their dang iphones the whole time. i did all the talking and they did all the grunting in response. i know guys dont like to talk, but geesh. i would have thought after 15 years, they'd have something to say to me.
my sister and BIL do it to. whenever they come home to visit, their faces are shoved in their laptops the entire time. drives me crazy!
dEHmom 08:47 AM 09-12-2011
I think the ds's for the kids were too keep them quiet.
My 2 oldest 5 and 7 yrs have ds's and the purpose of them is that they are portable. however, i do not EVER allow them to leave the house. The kids are timed with them, and they do not leave the living room. They are not allowed to play games when company is here, or if it's not approved by me or my dh first.
Honestly, my kids never play the ds for more than 5 mins even though I allow 15-20 mins.
It is sad. My kids have eaten out at restaurants many many times with us, and I have to say that 100% of the time, at least 1 person, usually an elderly person, will walk out of their way to tap me on the shoulder and say they are such well behaved and beautiful children. i know that was a total brag, but how can I not share that???
My 2 oldest 5 and 7 yrs have ds's and the purpose of them is that they are portable. however, i do not EVER allow them to leave the house. The kids are timed with them, and they do not leave the living room. They are not allowed to play games when company is here, or if it's not approved by me or my dh first.
Honestly, my kids never play the ds for more than 5 mins even though I allow 15-20 mins.
It is sad. My kids have eaten out at restaurants many many times with us, and I have to say that 100% of the time, at least 1 person, usually an elderly person, will walk out of their way to tap me on the shoulder and say they are such well behaved and beautiful children. i know that was a total brag, but how can I not share that???
melskids 08:53 AM 09-12-2011
Originally Posted by Michael:
I like my smart phone but I can't believe your make friends did not have more to talk about after 15 years. Are they married to their phones?
well, both of them are still single...so what's that tell ya?!I like my smart phone but I can't believe your make friends did not have more to talk about after 15 years. Are they married to their phones?
.....and they kept checking the score of some stupid game. Figures. LOL
Blackcat31 09:00 AM 09-12-2011
Yup, the world is definitley changing....
I grew up in a world where there were no church nurseries. I was required to sit silently in a pew with my parents and pay attention.
I grew up in a time where going to the grocery store with my mom was the treat. I didn't get one at the store.
I grew up in a time where if (which was rarely) we went to a restaurant, I sat in my chair and was quiet while I silently prayed that the waitress would have a kid menu so I could draw or play word search while I waited for my food.
I grew up in a time where if the principal or teacher called my house and told my parents I was naughty, they believed them. They never even asked for my side of the story because it was irrelavent.
I grew up in a time where if I didn't get up by 6 am on Saturday morning, I missed the cartoons and would have to watch ABC's Wide World of Sports or go outside and play.
I grew up in a world where going outside was the best thing ever!! If I stayed inside too long, my mom would find work for me to do.
I grew up in a world where I could tell we were nearing my grandma's house (2 hours away) because of the shape of the tree tops.
I grew up in a world that was not centered around me but rather I was a part of.
I am glad I grew up in the world I did.
I grew up in a world where there were no church nurseries. I was required to sit silently
in a pew with my parents and pay attention. I grew up in a time where going to the grocery store with my mom was the treat. I didn't get one at the store.
I grew up in a time where if (which was rarely) we went to a restaurant, I sat in my chair and was quiet while I silently prayed that the waitress would have a kid menu so I could draw or play word search while I waited for my food.
I grew up in a time where if the principal or teacher called my house and told my parents I was naughty, they believed them. They never even asked for my side of the story because it was irrelavent.
I grew up in a time where if I didn't get up by 6 am on Saturday morning, I missed the cartoons and would have to watch ABC's Wide World of Sports or go outside and play.
I grew up in a world where going outside was the best thing ever!! If I stayed inside too long, my mom would find work for me to do.
I grew up in a world where I could tell we were nearing my grandma's house (2 hours away) because of the shape of the tree tops.
I grew up in a world that was not centered around me but rather I was a part of.
I am glad I grew up in the world I did.
melissa ann 09:35 AM 09-12-2011
My kids are 4 1/2 and almost 7, we have never allowed any games, toys etc at the table for any meals. The sames goes for going out to eat. Would it really kill the kids to just sit patiently waiting for their food to arrive? My kids know if they don't behave, then we don't go out. Period. End of discussion.
We use the time waiting for our food talking about our day.
We use the time waiting for our food talking about our day.
Michelle 09:36 AM 09-12-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Yup, the world is definitley changing....
I grew up in a world where there were no church nurseries. I was required to sit silently in a pew with my parents and pay attention.
I grew up in a time where going to the grocery store with my mom was the treat. I didn't get one at the store.
I grew up in a time where if (which was rarely) we went to a restaurant, I sat in my chair and was quiet while I silently prayed that the waitress would have a kid menu so I could draw or play word search while I waited for my food.
I grew up in a time where if the principal or teacher called my house and told my parents I was naughty, they believed them. They never even asked for my side of the story because it was irrelavent.
I grew up in a time where if I didn't get up by 6 am on Saturday morning, I missed the cartoons and would have to watch ABC's Wide World of Sports or go outside and play.
I grew up in a world where going outside was the best thing ever!! If I stayed inside too long, my mom would find work for me to do.
I grew up in a world where I could tell we were nearing my grandma's house (2 hours away) because of the shape of the tree tops.
I grew up in a world that was not centered around me but rather I was a part of.
I am glad I grew up in the world I did.
so totally awesome!!!!!Yup, the world is definitley changing....
I grew up in a world where there were no church nurseries. I was required to sit silently
in a pew with my parents and pay attention. I grew up in a time where going to the grocery store with my mom was the treat. I didn't get one at the store.
I grew up in a time where if (which was rarely) we went to a restaurant, I sat in my chair and was quiet while I silently prayed that the waitress would have a kid menu so I could draw or play word search while I waited for my food.
I grew up in a time where if the principal or teacher called my house and told my parents I was naughty, they believed them. They never even asked for my side of the story because it was irrelavent.
I grew up in a time where if I didn't get up by 6 am on Saturday morning, I missed the cartoons and would have to watch ABC's Wide World of Sports or go outside and play.
I grew up in a world where going outside was the best thing ever!! If I stayed inside too long, my mom would find work for me to do.
I grew up in a world where I could tell we were nearing my grandma's house (2 hours away) because of the shape of the tree tops.
I grew up in a world that was not centered around me but rather I was a part of.
I am glad I grew up in the world I did.
littlemissmuffet 09:37 AM 09-12-2011
Very sad.
My hubs and I are pretty anti-technology. Don't get me wrong, we have a computer, a tv, a home phone, some video games... but for the most part, we live our daily lives communicating with the world FACE TO FACE. We don't watch much television, as we prefer going out to the movies. I don't really use the internet as a way of keeping in touch with people - I use it mostly for work purposes and research. We don't have cellphones and have no intention of ever having them, or giving our child one - we have a home phone, and we use that as our primary means of communication, along with paper letters and face to face communication. We both play video games from time to time.
We also have a rule that everyone sits at the table for supper - doesn't matter what's going on, or what time of day supper is - we all sit down and enjoy some nice, quality time together... nothing but good food and good conversation.
My hubs and I are pretty anti-technology. Don't get me wrong, we have a computer, a tv, a home phone, some video games... but for the most part, we live our daily lives communicating with the world FACE TO FACE. We don't watch much television, as we prefer going out to the movies. I don't really use the internet as a way of keeping in touch with people - I use it mostly for work purposes and research. We don't have cellphones and have no intention of ever having them, or giving our child one - we have a home phone, and we use that as our primary means of communication, along with paper letters and face to face communication. We both play video games from time to time.
We also have a rule that everyone sits at the table for supper - doesn't matter what's going on, or what time of day supper is - we all sit down and enjoy some nice, quality time together... nothing but good food and good conversation.
Michelle 09:50 AM 09-12-2011
I know I'm bad for admitting I using my cell phone at restaurants but one of my favorite things to do is text all my older kids ages 18-23 some of the jokes from my 8 year olds kids menu.. we have the best time because they are all in college and living all different places and I love it when they text me back right away with their answers or idk, lol. It's like they are at the table with us and my 8 year old loves it!
They usually have their friends around and their friends will usually join in on the fun. It's kinda my little way of having fun with my 4 oldest kids that I don't see much.
Also, I like to take pictures of something interesting at a restaurant (like a painting or fireplace) and send it to my dh and tell him if he wants to come eat with us he has to find us!!
We have so much fun doing that! and no , I don't let him drive from place to place... he texts me his answers and he's usually right the first time.
Kinda my version of scavenger hunt.
They usually have their friends around and their friends will usually join in on the fun. It's kinda my little way of having fun with my 4 oldest kids that I don't see much.
Also, I like to take pictures of something interesting at a restaurant (like a painting or fireplace) and send it to my dh and tell him if he wants to come eat with us he has to find us!!
We have so much fun doing that! and no , I don't let him drive from place to place... he texts me his answers and he's usually right the first time.
Kinda my version of scavenger hunt.
sharlan 10:08 AM 09-12-2011
Originally Posted by melissa ann:
My kids are 4 1/2 and almost 7, we have never allowed any games, toys etc at the table for any meals. The sames goes for going out to eat. Would it really kill the kids to just sit patiently waiting for their food to arrive? My kids know if they don't behave, then we don't go out. Period. End of discussion.
We use the time waiting for our food talking about our day.
Would it really be so hard for the parents to engage in a conversation with the kids? Yes, I realize we are with kids all day and don't want to deal with them at mealtimes, but too bad, that's life.My kids are 4 1/2 and almost 7, we have never allowed any games, toys etc at the table for any meals. The sames goes for going out to eat. Would it really kill the kids to just sit patiently waiting for their food to arrive? My kids know if they don't behave, then we don't go out. Period. End of discussion.
We use the time waiting for our food talking about our day.
IMHO, it's really sad when a parent can't chit chat, color on the menus, or whatever with the kids while they're waiting for their food.
I feel that we're becoming a generation that's going to wonder in 30 or 40 years what happened to our families. We're going to be sitting in our rockers with no family members around. Remember those kids you didn't have time to communicate with, be a part of their lives, well, guess what, they don't have time for you now? You forgot to teach them how to be an important part of your life.
sharlan 10:09 AM 09-12-2011
Originally Posted by Michelle:
I know I'm bad for admitting I using my cell phone at restaurants but one of my favorite things to do is text all my older kids ages 18-23 some of the jokes from my 8 year olds kids menu.. we have the best time because they are all in college and living all different places and I love it when they text me back right away with their answers or idk, lol. It's like they are at the table with us and my 8 year old loves it!
They usually have their friends around and their friends will usually join in on the fun. It's kinda my little way of having fun with my 4 oldest kids that I don't see much.
Also, I like to take pictures of something interesting at a restaurant (like a painting or fireplace) and send it to my dh and tell him if he wants to come eat with us he has to find us!!
We have so much fun doing that! and no , I don't let him drive from place to place... he texts me his answers and he's usually right the first time.
Kinda my version of scavenger hunt.
Ok, you're interacting with your child, not ignoring them so that you can check your important e-mails and chat with your friends.I know I'm bad for admitting I using my cell phone at restaurants but one of my favorite things to do is text all my older kids ages 18-23 some of the jokes from my 8 year olds kids menu.. we have the best time because they are all in college and living all different places and I love it when they text me back right away with their answers or idk, lol. It's like they are at the table with us and my 8 year old loves it!
They usually have their friends around and their friends will usually join in on the fun. It's kinda my little way of having fun with my 4 oldest kids that I don't see much.
Also, I like to take pictures of something interesting at a restaurant (like a painting or fireplace) and send it to my dh and tell him if he wants to come eat with us he has to find us!!
We have so much fun doing that! and no , I don't let him drive from place to place... he texts me his answers and he's usually right the first time.
Kinda my version of scavenger hunt.
renodeb 11:21 AM 09-12-2011
I see a lot of that when we go out to dinner. Its really sad. Now I have to admit that I do allow my teenage son (almost 15) to bring his phone but he is plugged in to everyone else and he puts it away when the food comes.(he is the oldest kid and gets bored dealing with his sister and cousins. I know, I know still doesnt make it ok but he is a great kid and very sweet and totally aware of everything around them. When the whole family goes out (11 of us with grma/grpa aunts , niece then they dont bring any thing cause theres enough going on with out needing a device. My kids time is very limitied with those devices b/c of school and sports etc.
Debbie
Debbie
SandeeAR 11:35 AM 09-12-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Yup, the world is definitley changing....
I grew up in a world where there were no church nurseries. I was required to sit silently in a pew with my parents and pay attention.
I grew up in a time where going to the grocery store with my mom was the treat. I didn't get one at the store.
I grew up in a time where if (which was rarely) we went to a restaurant, I sat in my chair and was quiet while I silently prayed that the waitress would have a kid menu so I could draw or play word search while I waited for my food.
I grew up in a time where if the principal or teacher called my house and told my parents I was naughty, they believed them. They never even asked for my side of the story because it was irrelavent.
I grew up in a time where if I didn't get up by 6 am on Saturday morning, I missed the cartoons and would have to watch ABC's Wide World of Sports or go outside and play.
I grew up in a world where going outside was the best thing ever!! If I stayed inside too long, my mom would find work for me to do.
I grew up in a world where I could tell we were nearing my grandma's house (2 hours away) because of the shape of the tree tops.
I grew up in a world that was not centered around me but rather I was a part of.
I am glad I grew up in the world I did.
Yup, the world is definitley changing....
I grew up in a world where there were no church nurseries. I was required to sit silently
in a pew with my parents and pay attention. I grew up in a time where going to the grocery store with my mom was the treat. I didn't get one at the store.
I grew up in a time where if (which was rarely) we went to a restaurant, I sat in my chair and was quiet while I silently prayed that the waitress would have a kid menu so I could draw or play word search while I waited for my food.
I grew up in a time where if the principal or teacher called my house and told my parents I was naughty, they believed them. They never even asked for my side of the story because it was irrelavent.
I grew up in a time where if I didn't get up by 6 am on Saturday morning, I missed the cartoons and would have to watch ABC's Wide World of Sports or go outside and play.
I grew up in a world where going outside was the best thing ever!! If I stayed inside too long, my mom would find work for me to do.
I grew up in a world where I could tell we were nearing my grandma's house (2 hours away) because of the shape of the tree tops.
I grew up in a world that was not centered around me but rather I was a part of.
I am glad I grew up in the world I did.
Hey I grew up in that world too! I'm so glad I did too! The best thing I remember was being able to ride my bike all over the place. Even by myself!!! Wish my kids had grown up in that world too.