Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Would You Be Tempted To Term For This?
momofboys 10:37 AM 06-21-2012
I had a DCP drop off this A.M. & mention that the other week little Billy hurt his foot on our outdoor slide. Mind you, when said "incident" occurred child was stepping up our 2 step slide (child is 3 1/2) and he stepped backward down the step to get off the slide & turned his foot to the side. There was nothing wrong with his foot, he was able to use it, walk & run on it to play, he never complained,etc. And there still is nothing wrong with his foot 2 weeks later. Not sure why parent is bringing this up but parent said to me this morning that I needed to monitor his child better because "if we had to incur any hospital/emergency room bills it would be all out-of-pocket expenses for us with our insurance." The way he said it was like you better watch my child & make sure NOTHING happens to him while in your care.
All I said was accidents do happen & your child is always watched but it irritates me to no end - this family's kids always come to care with bumps/scrapes/bruises, etc. They are exploring children & I would expect nothing else but it makes me feel like I need to be on pins & needles with this family & make sure nothing ever happens or concerned that if something happens at home they will say it happened here. So frustrating. Would you do anything?
Not that it is pertinent but this family is not poor - the dad & mom both work in the medical field so an ER visit would not bankrupt them. Not that their financial status matters but the DCD made it sound like if they had to incur any out of pocket expenses they would be done for.
All I said was accidents do happen & your child is always watched but it irritates me to no end - this family's kids always come to care with bumps/scrapes/bruises, etc. They are exploring children & I would expect nothing else but it makes me feel like I need to be on pins & needles with this family & make sure nothing ever happens or concerned that if something happens at home they will say it happened here. So frustrating. Would you do anything?Not that it is pertinent but this family is not poor - the dad & mom both work in the medical field so an ER visit would not bankrupt them. Not that their financial status matters but the DCD made it sound like if they had to incur any out of pocket expenses they would be done for.
EntropyControlSpecialist 10:39 AM 06-21-2012
I would initiate a discussion about their expectations for daycare. If the are looking for one-on-one supervision so that their precious does not ever get a boo boo then they need to hire a nanny with superpowers.
It's unrealistic to think that you can protect a child 100% of the time. That is, unless the parents bring precious a bubble to roll around in while in your care.
On a funny side note, I had a child bump into something and get a mark on their face. Not a cut or scratch, but a mark (1/4" red mark). Mom told us that we should have/could have used neosporin on it.
The following morning, the mother arrives, whips out the neosporin, and applies it liberally to the child's mark. My husband said he was glad I was there when it was done, because he would have said, "OH! I did not know that creams help with bruising!"
It's unrealistic to think that you can protect a child 100% of the time. That is, unless the parents bring precious a bubble to roll around in while in your care.
On a funny side note, I had a child bump into something and get a mark on their face. Not a cut or scratch, but a mark (1/4" red mark). Mom told us that we should have/could have used neosporin on it.
The following morning, the mother arrives, whips out the neosporin, and applies it liberally to the child's mark. My husband said he was glad I was there when it was done, because he would have said, "OH! I did not know that creams help with bruising!"
KBCsMommy 10:50 AM 06-21-2012
I termed a child over this type of situation before. DCM would call me almost everyday after pick up. DCG was 8 mo when I termed. But DCM would call or text, "did you see a scratch on her hand?" " was baby warm today because her face is red" " what happend to her today she is fussy, i know something had to have happend". It was very frustrating too and I felt that she did not trust me with her infant , but wouldn't come right out with it.
I finally termed when DCM posted on facebook to her 500 fb friends that " DCG has learned to pull hair, and she learned it from DAYCARE!! Other kids are pulling her hair, and now she is doing it to me". TERMED the very next day
DCG was 8 mo. Here 2 days a week, for 6 hours a day with 2 naps. She had very little awake time and the other kids were busy with other things.
I feel families that make remarks like this are liability. If ANYTHING happens to their precious they will not hesitate to take action. Nevermind that you have kissed boo boos and cuddled them since they were infants.
I finally termed when DCM posted on facebook to her 500 fb friends that " DCG has learned to pull hair, and she learned it from DAYCARE!! Other kids are pulling her hair, and now she is doing it to me". TERMED the very next day
DCG was 8 mo. Here 2 days a week, for 6 hours a day with 2 naps. She had very little awake time and the other kids were busy with other things.
I feel families that make remarks like this are liability. If ANYTHING happens to their precious they will not hesitate to take action. Nevermind that you have kissed boo boos and cuddled them since they were infants.
Willow 10:52 AM 06-21-2012
I wouldn't appreciate the sue happy implication in that.
Do you have anything in your policies that state you are not responsible for any costs incurred for injuries requiring medical attention?
If you do I'd make sure to review that with them, and then let them know if it's not acceptable them that's ok, but then maybe they need to find a new provider who's more in line with their expectations (which, good luck, because as most of us have hearts made of gold the rest of us isn't). I'd make sure this review is well documented, possibly do the whole thing via email so you have record of them stating they either understand *they* are financially responsible for treatment of any injuries or are moving on instead.
Do you have anything in your policies that state you are not responsible for any costs incurred for injuries requiring medical attention?
If you do I'd make sure to review that with them, and then let them know if it's not acceptable them that's ok, but then maybe they need to find a new provider who's more in line with their expectations (which, good luck, because as most of us have hearts made of gold the rest of us isn't). I'd make sure this review is well documented, possibly do the whole thing via email so you have record of them stating they either understand *they* are financially responsible for treatment of any injuries or are moving on instead.
momofboys 11:04 AM 06-21-2012
Originally Posted by Willow:
I wouldn't appreciate the sue happy implication in that.
Do you have anything in your policies that state you are not responsible for any costs incurred for injuries requiring medical attention?
If you do I'd make sure to review that with them, and then let them know if it's not acceptable them that's ok, but then maybe they need to find a new provider who's more in line with their expectations (which, good luck, because as most of us have hearts made of gold the rest of us isn't). I'd make sure this review is well documented, possibly do the whole thing via email so you have record of them stating they either understand *they* are financially responsible for treatment of any injuries or are moving on instead.
I do - the emergency form I have parents sign blatantly states that for any incident that occurs parents will bear responsibility for payment to the ER/doctor, etc. Of course they could turn around & sue me no matter what is said. It just makes me sad - I love these kids but I am not sure I want to deal with parents who make such belittling comments. I know I need to toughen myself up & not let things bother me but I didn't type everything that was said & it honestly hurt. Just the comments about the $$$ burned me up especially. My gosh, who tries to allow a little one to get hurt & if someone got hurt God-forbid that it happened here. I guess I should start questioning the bumps & bruises they get at home & asking them why they aren't watching their kids closerI wouldn't appreciate the sue happy implication in that.
Do you have anything in your policies that state you are not responsible for any costs incurred for injuries requiring medical attention?
If you do I'd make sure to review that with them, and then let them know if it's not acceptable them that's ok, but then maybe they need to find a new provider who's more in line with their expectations (which, good luck, because as most of us have hearts made of gold the rest of us isn't). I'd make sure this review is well documented, possibly do the whole thing via email so you have record of them stating they either understand *they* are financially responsible for treatment of any injuries or are moving on instead.
. I just feel like I need to get rid of them if I hear anything else like this from this dad.
momofboys 11:05 AM 06-21-2012
Originally Posted by Willow:
I wouldn't appreciate the sue happy implication in that.
Do you have anything in your policies that state you are not responsible for any costs incurred for injuries requiring medical attention?
If you do I'd make sure to review that with them, and then let them know if it's not acceptable them that's ok, but then maybe they need to find a new provider who's more in line with their expectations (which, good luck, because as most of us have hearts made of gold the rest of us isn't). I'd make sure this review is well documented, possibly do the whole thing via email so you have record of them stating they either understand *they* are financially responsible for treatment of any injuries or are moving on instead.
I wouldn't appreciate the sue happy implication in that.
Do you have anything in your policies that state you are not responsible for any costs incurred for injuries requiring medical attention?
If you do I'd make sure to review that with them, and then let them know if it's not acceptable them that's ok, but then maybe they need to find a new provider who's more in line with their expectations (which, good luck, because as most of us have hearts made of gold the rest of us isn't). I'd make sure this review is well documented, possibly do the whole thing via email so you have record of them stating they either understand *they* are financially responsible for treatment of any injuries or are moving on instead.
I think I will do exactly that via e-mail, I will try to keep all emotion I am feeling out of the e-mail. Anyone want to help me write one?
jojosmommy 11:21 AM 06-21-2012
Yes, this would tempt me to term. I would have a sit down with mom and ask her what she really meant.
I had a mom tell me (after a bounced check) she wasn't sure she could trust me with her kid anymore. I whipped out the term letter and told her never to come back. "Surely if you don't trust me you wont be bringing your child back here."
I had a mom tell me (after a bounced check) she wasn't sure she could trust me with her kid anymore. I whipped out the term letter and told her never to come back. "Surely if you don't trust me you wont be bringing your child back here."
cheerfuldom 12:15 PM 06-21-2012
I know these types of parents, ugh.
Send an email with a copy of your accident policy. Let them know that you cannot guarantee that Junior will never have any accident in your care, although you do everything possible to prevent that. If they are no longer okay with the accident policy and what you will or wont do if Junior gets hurt, they are always welcome to look for different childcare. Remind them about your exiting policy (two weeks notice). Finish up with the assurance that Junior is doing well at your daycare, you are happy with the arrangement in every other way, but you want to make sure they are aware of what you are and are not liable for so they can then make an educated decision about the future in daycare.
Send an email with a copy of your accident policy. Let them know that you cannot guarantee that Junior will never have any accident in your care, although you do everything possible to prevent that. If they are no longer okay with the accident policy and what you will or wont do if Junior gets hurt, they are always welcome to look for different childcare. Remind them about your exiting policy (two weeks notice). Finish up with the assurance that Junior is doing well at your daycare, you are happy with the arrangement in every other way, but you want to make sure they are aware of what you are and are not liable for so they can then make an educated decision about the future in daycare.
wahmof3 12:31 PM 06-21-2012
I agree with PP, yes, send a copy of your accident policy.
BUT I would also have to re-evaluate our business relationship. I am learning that when a DCP "threatens" like this (whatever the reason: in your case saying you be responsible to cover medical treatment) the family IMO starts to become a liability. I would not want to feel like I am walking on eggshells KWIM? I would probably start looking to replace.
Please keep us posted
I reread the OP: Was the parent saying You, the provider, would have to pay or it would be all out of pocket expense for them?? Either way, I would still have to re-evaluate things.
BUT I would also have to re-evaluate our business relationship. I am learning that when a DCP "threatens" like this (whatever the reason: in your case saying you be responsible to cover medical treatment) the family IMO starts to become a liability. I would not want to feel like I am walking on eggshells KWIM? I would probably start looking to replace.
Please keep us posted
I reread the OP: Was the parent saying You, the provider, would have to pay or it would be all out of pocket expense for them?? Either way, I would still have to re-evaluate things.
momofboys 03:20 PM 06-22-2012
Originally Posted by wahmof3:
I agree with PP, yes, send a copy of your accident policy.
BUT I would also have to re-evaluate our business relationship. I am learning that when a DCP "threatens" like this (whatever the reason: in your case saying you be responsible to cover medical treatment) the family IMO starts to become a liability. I would not want to feel like I am walking on eggshells KWIM? I would probably start looking to replace.
Please keep us posted
I reread the OP: Was the parent saying You, the provider, would have to pay or it would be all out of pocket expense for them?? Either way, I would still have to re-evaluate things.
The parent was letting me know he would be out $$$$ b/c if the child got hurt in my care he'd have to pay to meet his deductible I guess. I get it - but accidents happen! My SA son (5th grader at the time) got hit with a swinging tennis racket during gym class at school last year (total accident - other child did not see him). Well it made a gash in my son's face above his eye. It was an accident plain & simple. Did I ask the school or the other child's family to reimburse me for the fees I paid to take my child to urgent care for stitches? NO! It was an accident & these things happen. Frustrating but part of life.I agree with PP, yes, send a copy of your accident policy.
BUT I would also have to re-evaluate our business relationship. I am learning that when a DCP "threatens" like this (whatever the reason: in your case saying you be responsible to cover medical treatment) the family IMO starts to become a liability. I would not want to feel like I am walking on eggshells KWIM? I would probably start looking to replace.
Please keep us posted
I reread the OP: Was the parent saying You, the provider, would have to pay or it would be all out of pocket expense for them?? Either way, I would still have to re-evaluate things.
wahmof3 03:35 PM 06-22-2012
Originally Posted by momofboys:
The parent was letting me know he would be out $$$$ b/c if the child got hurt in my care he'd have to pay to meet his deductible I guess. I get it - but accidents happen! My SA son (5th grader at the time) got hit with a swinging tennis racket during gym class at school last year (total accident - other child did not see him). Well it made a gash in my son's face above his eye. It was an accident plain & simple. Did I ask the school or the other child's family to reimburse me for the fees I paid to take my child to urgent care for stitches? NO! It was an accident & these things happen. Frustrating but part of life.
Couldn't agree with you more!!! The whole comment made by the DCP just rubs me the wrong way. The parent was letting me know he would be out $$$$ b/c if the child got hurt in my care he'd have to pay to meet his deductible I guess. I get it - but accidents happen! My SA son (5th grader at the time) got hit with a swinging tennis racket during gym class at school last year (total accident - other child did not see him). Well it made a gash in my son's face above his eye. It was an accident plain & simple. Did I ask the school or the other child's family to reimburse me for the fees I paid to take my child to urgent care for stitches? NO! It was an accident & these things happen. Frustrating but part of life.
I guess if the DCP doesn't trust me enough the business relationship is going nowhere. That said, I have also learned that communication is major in this business, so maybe if you confront (I hate confrontation) the DCP about this and ask what was really meant it could clear things up.
I hope you find a solution that works
momofboys 03:40 PM 06-22-2012
I agree about the confrontation/communication - I am working on a letter (in another post) & am having trouble finding the words. I want to say it isn't acceptable to yell at me about something & if I am ever confronted like that it is grounds for immediate termination. It's okay to ask me about something or be concerned but raise your voice to me, leave me in tears all in front of my kids - NO!