Daycare.com Forum
dEHmom 07:12 AM 11-24-2011
OYE! Same boy I posted about yesterday, who's always been such a good, sweet little boy, is 1.5 yrs, entering the "terrible 2's" and yesterday all day it was
NO!
and
"Mine!"
I can't handle that. I think I want to skip ages 1.5 through to 3 from now on. It's the worst phase I think, and I don't have the patience for it.
You tell him something and he flat out says "NO!" and he'll go up to another kid and grab something and scream "MINE!"
Help me please!!!!!!
p.s. The food issue I've decided to feed him seperately, or move him away a bit so he cannot reach other kids food.
NO!
and
"Mine!"
I can't handle that. I think I want to skip ages 1.5 through to 3 from now on. It's the worst phase I think, and I don't have the patience for it.
You tell him something and he flat out says "NO!" and he'll go up to another kid and grab something and scream "MINE!"
Help me please!!!!!!
p.s. The food issue I've decided to feed him seperately, or move him away a bit so he cannot reach other kids food.
AnneCordelia 08:06 AM 11-24-2011
My playroom is large and I can move bookshelves to seperate areas. I have 4 1yos here and when one of them cannot play nicely with the others then they are seperated into a section with toys of their own to play with. Is there a way to seperate him (are you allowed?) until he can play nicely?
I'm always careful to distinguish for them that all the toys here are MINE and I am kind to SHARE with them.
I'm always careful to distinguish for them that all the toys here are MINE and I am kind to SHARE with them.
Ariana 09:34 AM 11-24-2011
It's funny because my daugter is now in this stage and it was like overnight she became a "mine" demon!! I also just read an article in Scientific American MIND psychology edition about this very phenomena. It persists througout our life actually and this is where it all begins. It's largely a North American thing because we're very object oriented. How many adults do you know who are very possessive about objects? My husband and his last car come to mind 
I try to pay attention to who had what first and then I will set up a timer and tell them "you each have 2 minutes" and then they trade. There are lots of tears at first but they eventually get used to it. I also find that by the time the 2 minutes is up they've already dropped the toy anyway!! I will also sometimes tell them "you need to wait until she's finished with it" if it's a toy that's not in high demand and will only be played with for a short period of time. I have also begun to talk to my daughter about how grabbing toys makes the other person feel "they feel sad" etc just so she understands it's not the right thing to do. Unfortunately it's an ongoing process and hopefully by the time they are 3 they've learned to share somewhat. I was having this struggle last year with a DCG who had just turned 2. Now that she's 3 she's much easier to get along with!!
I try to pay attention to who had what first and then I will set up a timer and tell them "you each have 2 minutes" and then they trade. There are lots of tears at first but they eventually get used to it. I also find that by the time the 2 minutes is up they've already dropped the toy anyway!! I will also sometimes tell them "you need to wait until she's finished with it" if it's a toy that's not in high demand and will only be played with for a short period of time. I have also begun to talk to my daughter about how grabbing toys makes the other person feel "they feel sad" etc just so she understands it's not the right thing to do. Unfortunately it's an ongoing process and hopefully by the time they are 3 they've learned to share somewhat. I was having this struggle last year with a DCG who had just turned 2. Now that she's 3 she's much easier to get along with!!
dEHmom 01:38 PM 11-24-2011
yeah it's totally normal phase and I get that. Kids go through many phases lol some are just worse than others.
I ended up packing the kids up after nap and lunch, then headed for a walk to my friends daycare. they all played fairly well, but then this boy had a full blown tantrum!!!! he dropped to the floor kicking and screaming and it was a loud scream, not a cry even, just a scream. I have no idea if something else is going on with him. I know he appears to be coming down with a cold. So I hope that's all it is, and I hope by monday he's better. I cannot believe this is the same child. We packed up immediately went home, and it was back to naps for all the babies. Actually my youngest ds is asleep right now too! bonus! my older ds is playing his video games, so it's very nice and quiet right now. i swept, mopped, did dishes, and now i'm relaxing with a coffee and daycare.com.
although my dd is about to storm through the door in 10 minutes.
I ended up packing the kids up after nap and lunch, then headed for a walk to my friends daycare. they all played fairly well, but then this boy had a full blown tantrum!!!! he dropped to the floor kicking and screaming and it was a loud scream, not a cry even, just a scream. I have no idea if something else is going on with him. I know he appears to be coming down with a cold. So I hope that's all it is, and I hope by monday he's better. I cannot believe this is the same child. We packed up immediately went home, and it was back to naps for all the babies. Actually my youngest ds is asleep right now too! bonus! my older ds is playing his video games, so it's very nice and quiet right now. i swept, mopped, did dishes, and now i'm relaxing with a coffee and daycare.com.
although my dd is about to storm through the door in 10 minutes.
Country Kids 02:00 PM 11-24-2011
Oh my goodness! I was reading your post and thinking she has a house full today and so does her friend!!! They are gung ho about doing childcare today. Then I realized you are in Canada so not celebrating Thanksgiving. I totally forget there are others on here from other countries that don't have the same holidays as us.
Ariana 02:40 PM 11-24-2011
Originally Posted by Country Kids:
Oh my goodness! I was reading your post and thinking she has a house full today and so does her friend!!! They are gung ho about doing childcare today. Then I realized you are in Canada so not celebrating Thanksgiving. I totally forget there are others on here from other countries that don't have the same holidays as us.
LOL! Yeah ours was in October. Funny though that we still get all the "black Friday" sales going on up here too eventhough it's not "our" Thanksgiving Oh my goodness! I was reading your post and thinking she has a house full today and so does her friend!!! They are gung ho about doing childcare today. Then I realized you are in Canada so not celebrating Thanksgiving. I totally forget there are others on here from other countries that don't have the same holidays as us.
dEHmom 03:26 PM 11-24-2011
Originally Posted by Ariana:
LOL! Yeah ours was in October. Funny though that we still get all the "black Friday" sales going on up here too eventhough it's not "our" Thanksgiving
mostly because they are trying to keep many of us from going south for shopping and spending all the money down there. LOL! Yeah ours was in October. Funny though that we still get all the "black Friday" sales going on up here too eventhough it's not "our" Thanksgiving
don't forget too that most debit machines don't work on black friday, they all crash.
dEHmom 03:27 PM 11-24-2011
Originally Posted by Country Kids:
Oh my goodness! I was reading your post and thinking she has a house full today and so does her friend!!! They are gung ho about doing childcare today. Then I realized you are in Canada so not celebrating Thanksgiving. I totally forget there are others on here from other countries that don't have the same holidays as us.
hahha yeah we had our thanksgiving already last month. gives us more time to have a break from turkey before christmas rolls around.Oh my goodness! I was reading your post and thinking she has a house full today and so does her friend!!! They are gung ho about doing childcare today. Then I realized you are in Canada so not celebrating Thanksgiving. I totally forget there are others on here from other countries that don't have the same holidays as us.
nannyde 03:43 PM 11-24-2011
I don't allow the word "mine" or the "mine" body language. I own all the toys and we don't allow children to take toys from the other kids or hoard toys.
When the kids understand that they don't own any of the toys and that we will supervise the other kids behavior to insure they are not having things taken from them or no one kid can "resource guard" any of the toys then that disapears from their language here.
They usually come up with it at around eighteen months. We catch it right when it starts and let them know that we don't allow that word or the actions that come with it. If they persist with it the toy is removed from their play and they are physically redirected to go to play with something else. We use "no mine" and "leave it" when we are telling them to let go of the toy and go onto something else. We use "leave it" when they are trying to bogart a toy or vulture a toy they want.
Within a week or so they learn that that word doesn't have any meaning here so they don't use it. It doesn't net in them having a toy to themself or getting a toy from another kid. It looses it's value so it goes away.
It's a normal behavior and is very easily stopped.
When the kids understand that they don't own any of the toys and that we will supervise the other kids behavior to insure they are not having things taken from them or no one kid can "resource guard" any of the toys then that disapears from their language here.
They usually come up with it at around eighteen months. We catch it right when it starts and let them know that we don't allow that word or the actions that come with it. If they persist with it the toy is removed from their play and they are physically redirected to go to play with something else. We use "no mine" and "leave it" when we are telling them to let go of the toy and go onto something else. We use "leave it" when they are trying to bogart a toy or vulture a toy they want.
Within a week or so they learn that that word doesn't have any meaning here so they don't use it. It doesn't net in them having a toy to themself or getting a toy from another kid. It looses it's value so it goes away.
It's a normal behavior and is very easily stopped.
dave4him 05:58 PM 11-25-2011
I try to the distraction method, which only works so well since my boy wants whatever his sister has even if its the same toy
countrymom 05:20 AM 11-26-2011
I want to add, that because I live so close to the detroit border my kids now tell people they have 2 thanksgivings, one in october and one in november and the one in november is called black friday, omg they kill us.
2ndFamilyDC 08:09 AM 11-28-2011
Originally Posted by dEHmom:
NO!
and
"Mine!"
I can't handle that. I think I want to skip ages 1.5 through to 3 from now on. It's the worst phase I think, and I don't have the patience for it.
NO!
and
"Mine!"
I can't handle that. I think I want to skip ages 1.5 through to 3 from now on. It's the worst phase I think, and I don't have the patience for it.
I agree with you, only for me it is 12mths to 20 mths.
Only thing is it is hard to get any kids over 2 1/2, they are already
established in a daycare.
dEHmom 12:15 PM 11-29-2011
Thanks ladies!
So I haven't heard the word mine in a few days! yay!
So I haven't heard the word mine in a few days! yay!
Sunchimes 03:19 PM 11-29-2011
One of my kids came in this morning after 10 days off. Her mom was so excited because "she really started talking while she was gone". Sure enough, the first words out of her mouth were Mine!!
I've always said that I love 2 year olds the best. The first time you ask them if they want a cookie and they stomp that little foot and scream NO, I'm in love. Of course, the dcks are just moving into that. I'll see if it's still true when I have 2 or 3 for 12 hours a day. I may change my mind.
I've always said that I love 2 year olds the best. The first time you ask them if they want a cookie and they stomp that little foot and scream NO, I'm in love. Of course, the dcks are just moving into that. I'll see if it's still true when I have 2 or 3 for 12 hours a day. I may change my mind.