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DaveA 04:12 AM 03-27-2015
I got an invitation in the mail to my DCB's 1st birthday party. I NEVER go to things like this. I don't hang out with my DC families on personal time. I did it ONCE and it was "interesting" (I think I posted about that). Now I get to tell a way too happy DCM I won't be there. Yippee

Do you all go to things like this? Or do you keep personal and professional lives separate?
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Unregistered 04:49 AM 03-27-2015
They can be awkward little affairs, can't they? I politely decline and mention that we'll have a small celebration on Friday. I used to attend these things, but explaining who you are, having the child keep running to you, small talk with second cousins, "working" on a Saturday....((shudder)) I would, however, recommend attending a couple of these for providers who have a hard time implementing their policies. You get to see that...yes...the child DOES do that at home and the people who unapologetically track mud in your house are going to ask you to remove your shoes. You'll start Monday with clearer eyes and a firmer backbone.
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AuntTami 05:49 AM 03-27-2015
I would just explain to her that while you whole heartedly appreciate the invite, you have to decline. It's a fine line between keeping a daycare family as clients or crossing into the friend world and once you've crossed the line, there's no going back. In an effort to keep your relationship strictly professional, you'll hAbe to decline but you'll be doing a simple celebration for him at daycare.
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Meeko 06:23 AM 03-27-2015
I thank parents who invite us, but explain that I cannot attend ALL the kids birthdays, and so to be fair, I don't attend any.

The truth is I don't wish to go to any of their parties. But the "fair" argument works for those who ask.
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Blackcat31 06:30 AM 03-27-2015
Originally Posted by DaveArmour:
I got an invitation in the mail to my DCB's 1st birthday party. I NEVER go to things like this. I don't hang out with my DC families on personal time. I did it ONCE and it was "interesting" (I think I posted about that). Now I get to tell a way too happy DCM I won't be there. Yippee

Do you all go to things like this? Or do you keep personal and professional lives separate?
VERY separate.

Here is my standard reply....

"DCM, thanks for inviting me to Johnny's birthday party. While I appreciate the invite, I just want you to know that I wont be attending. I find that I can not always commit to being at a daycare child's celebration depending on the day/time etc and if I can't go to all of them, I go to none of them so that there are never any hurt feelings among the kids and/or families. I am sure you understand. We will however make sure to have a celebration here so that Johnny knows I know it's his birthday."
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Blackcat31 06:31 AM 03-27-2015
Originally Posted by Meeko:
I thank parents who invite us, but explain that I cannot attend ALL the kids birthdays, and so to be fair, I don't attend any.

The truth is I don't wish to go to any of their parties. But the "fair" argument works for those who ask.
Meeko was typing the same time I was....

Her reasons are the same as mine.
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hope 07:45 AM 03-27-2015
I do. I only care for three families so we are all a bit close. Some parties I enjoy, some are work for me and my family. It is cute to meet the people that the little ones talk about all the time. My own children are still young enough that I can engross myself in their play and conversation if I want to avoid being the daycare lady. I have no problem declining the invitation if I have other plans.
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jenboo 08:09 AM 03-27-2015
I always go. I had some families I was close to and some that I weren't.
I still went either way.
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Unregistered 11:11 AM 03-27-2015
I do not except one family but they are family friends before they had kids.
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cara041083 11:16 AM 03-27-2015
I don't go to birthday parties, but I do get them a small gift and we have a treat for snack time to celebrate the birthday child.
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Shell 11:26 AM 03-27-2015
I go, but only because my kids are young and are invited as well.

If my kids were older/ grown, I think I would have the same opinion as Meeko and BC.
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KIDZRMYBIZ 11:48 AM 03-27-2015
I went when my kids were little, too, because those were their friends. It did muddle the line between personal and professional. And the worst is when the birthday kid wants to only sit in my lap, and shun the from-out-of-town grandma! So now that my kids are older SA, I don't go anymore. I would just make an excuse of a prior commitment. I haven't actually been invited to one in about 2 years now though, so maybe DCFs realize that I might not be interested or it might not be appropriate to invite me now that my kids aren't little.
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mommiebookworm 12:33 PM 03-27-2015
I go, because my daughter is still young and these kids are her friends. But, not all my daycare kiddos have parties. So we do a treat at snacktime and small gift.
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NoMoreJuice! 05:23 PM 03-27-2015
I always try to go to bday parties I am invited to. I dearly love my families and my kids, and it's so great to see them in a more relaxed setting! We are all going to a Royals game mid april, and I have tailgating games and snacks planned for the kids. Can't wait! There have been a few times I wasn't able to make it to a bday party for scheduling reasons, but I send a small gift with my apologies. Regardless of party situations, we always have a celebration at daycare.
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finsup 06:22 PM 03-27-2015
I go, but its mostly because my son gets invited and for some reason parents all attend birthday parties now lol. When I was little you got dropped off at the host's house and picked up in a few hours. But yeah I want him to be able to go and it hasn't been an issue (yet lol).
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Josiegirl 03:55 AM 03-28-2015
I used to attend when invited, probably 15 years or so ago. Dance recitals, birthday parties, that sort of thing. I usually don't anymore. Like someone said, if you go to one then you're invited to everything, and I'm just not a social person to begin with. A lot of those things leave me feeling very awkward.
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Unregistered 12:24 AM 03-31-2015
I'd go as I get quite close to lots of my families. I would draw the line there. Dance recitals, etc. no way!

I'd go only if it worked in my schedule. I would not go out of my way to attend. If I was extra busy, had to squeeze it in, etc. I'd say I was busy.

We also have a small celebration here. Crown, pick from birthday box ($ store items), &birthday bear at their spot at the table.
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lovemykidstoo 05:55 AM 03-31-2015
I was reading this yesterday and was thinking that I was so lucky that I don't get invited to dck's parties. I was a long time ago and I went and it was so awkward because I knew noone but the parents. I'm just not great at making conversation with people I don't know at all. Then yesterday happened. One of my dcb's brother is turning one soon and he was talking about it and said that momma had an invitation for me. Crap! I am hoping it's on a night that I already have plans lol. Not that I don't love this family because I do but it's hard for me socially.
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Blackcat31 06:29 AM 03-31-2015
Originally Posted by lovemykidstoo:
I was reading this yesterday and was thinking that I was so lucky that I don't get invited to dck's parties. I was a long time ago and I went and it was so awkward because I knew noone but the parents. I'm just not great at making conversation with people I don't know at all. Then yesterday happened. One of my dcb's brother is turning one soon and he was talking about it and said that momma had an invitation for me. Crap! I am hoping it's on a night that I already have plans lol. Not that I don't love this family because I do but it's hard for me socially.
.....and as the child care provider, guess who always seems to get stuck "watching" or entertaining all the kids at the party while the adults that do know each other socialize?
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lovemykidstoo 06:33 AM 03-31-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
.....and as the child care provider, guess who always seems to get stuck "watching" or entertaining all the kids at the party while the adults that do know each other socialize?
Exactly!!! His birthday is April 16 and mine is Apriil 18, so I'm thinkiing that's my out is that I can say that I already have plans for my own birthday. I'm sure his party will be on the weekend and my birthday is on Saturday.
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Unregistered 05:02 PM 03-31-2015
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
.....and as the child care provider, guess who always seems to get stuck "watching" or entertaining all the kids at the party while the adults that do know each other socialize?
The kids always run to me saying my name! I love it! But I do spend my time with the adults. I will not work on my day off!
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