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  #1  
Old 11-27-2012, 10:58 PM
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Default How long do you let parents "hang out"?

How long do you let parents "hang out" when they come to pick up their kids, and do you have a blurb in your handbook about it?

I've been in the buisness for 6yrs now, most families come pick up their children, ask how their day was etc and are on their way. But I've been running into more and more families that upon arriving to pick up their child for the day who want to "hang out", talk etc for 15, 20 or even 30min. Some of the families even have older siblings they are bringing with them. I've tried for the most part ignoring them and continuing on with my buisness and caring for the children but its like they just don't get it. I should mention that these parents are picking up their children well before closing time which i think may be one reason why they think its okay for them to stay for soo long. think that I will need to add a blurb into my handbook about this. I have something about length of time parents can stay at drop off (no more than 5mins) but never thought I needed to include pick up.
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Old 11-28-2012, 04:22 AM
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I'm very interested on what others will advise you in this matter. I have a couple that between drop off and pick up., spend in my daycare close to 1 hour per day!!!! Its driving me absolutely crazy!!! Its their first child, overly protective, extremely demanding family. At first I did not say nothing thinking they would soon see there is nothing to hide or be suspicions about in my home... but its been 3 months and they're getting worst by the week!!! ...to the point of using my bathroom and laying down on the kids play bed. HELP!!!! "Dear Santa, I need for Christmas a back bone "
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  #3  
Old 11-28-2012, 06:02 AM
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I do not let parents hang around at all. When they arrive at pick up I give them a brief run down on how the dck day went and that is it. I have a dcg who behaves really badly when her mother comes. She will throw things on the floor, tear my books intentionally, curse, hit the other kids, hit at me and whatever else the dcm let her get away with.
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Old 11-28-2012, 06:10 AM
AnneCordelia AnneCordelia is offline
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No hanging out at all.
I tell them that the others Will act out with another adult in the house and I need to give them my attention, so thanks for understanding that I need drops and pick ups to be quick. If its the last child then its easy to say, "I'm done for the day...have a good evening!"
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  #5  
Old 11-28-2012, 06:37 AM
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I have a couple of little routines I do to help people get on their way. In the morning I have the children say "Have a good day" to their parents. If the drop-off is going on too long I'll say "Okay dckid, why don't you tell mom or dad to have a good day so they can get on their way," (hint hint.)

Whenever I say goodbye to the kids at night I give them high-fives and a knucks. So if the pick-up starts to drag on I ask the dckid for high fives and knucks and then usually say something like "could you be a helper and hold the door for mom" or something to that effect to get them moving.

I've never understood the extended pick-up. If it was me I'd want to get my kid and go. Don't they have dinner to make, baths to do, etc. etc. etc
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  #6  
Old 11-28-2012, 06:40 AM
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no hanging out at all although I have a few parents try it. i do both pickups and dropoffs at the door and dont even let parents come in usually. I would never let parents hang around for an hour a day....gosh, what a nightmare.
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  #7  
Old 11-28-2012, 06:45 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AnneCordelia View Post
No hanging out at all.
I tell them that the others Will act out with another adult in the house and I need to give them my attention, so thanks for understanding that I need drops and pick ups to be quick. If its the last child then its easy to say, "I'm done for the day...have a good evening!"
This is what I try to do. It's tough, but you need to be firm.
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  #8  
Old 11-28-2012, 07:06 AM
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In the morning after mom/dad takes off their coats and shoes I take the child and say lets go play! Bye mom bye dad see you tonight and walk away leaving them stand there.

At the end of the day I did have parents picking up & after me handing over their kid and them doing the hoochie kootchie thing for about 2 minutes and telling the kid how they missed them all day they would then stand by the door and talk while the kid would run off and do all kinds of things I never permitted. They would say nothing! Climbing on things, up on my couches where they are not allowed during the days, touching things that they know they are not allowed to touch, even trying to get into my fridge and cupboards!)

They would stand there and talk while I was chasing their kid around continually taking them away from stuff and wishing they would just leave! I am tired by this time of day and I am done with chasing your kid around, leave already!!!!! Parents are oblivious and sometimes so stupid!! Plus your kid is NOT like this during the day!


Now I have gated off an area right by the door so that I can put the child down over the gate. The area is about the size of a pack n play maybe a bit bigger about 4 x 4 feet square so there is no room for the kid to move or run around.

Parents leave MUCH more quickly now because when their kid is hanging off of THEM and causing them grief rather than me it is a different story!
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  #9  
Old 11-28-2012, 07:15 AM
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My cubbyroom is separated by a half door so parents don't come past that area of my child care but there are times when a parent will sit down on the bench and want to hang out.

It doesn't happen too often as almost all my families arrive and pick up within the same 60 minutes and the cubby room isnt big enough for everyone to be in it at the same time.

I have a section in my handbook about quick and efficient drop offs/pick ups but it isnt in reference to parents just wanting to hang out. It's more about making the drop offs/pick ups quick for the child's benefit since long drawn out goodbyes etc are tough on kids.

Here is what my HB says:

Transition times such as drop off and pick-up can be a difficult time for children. Please try to make these times as short as possible. If there are things you need to discuss with me, please call and set up a time where we can talk uninterrupted. If your child is experiencing any separation anxiety issues, please rest assured that I will do everything necessary to welcome your child and make their transition from parent to childcare a comfortable and pleasant one. If your child does not calm down and join the rest of the group within a reasonable amount of time, you will be called to assist or pick up if necessary.

Behavior for some children during these times can result in needing to be disciplined. Should this occur, you will need to be the one in charge. As your child's parent, you need to be the ultimate authority. If it becomes necessary for me to step in and discipline your child, alternate drop off/pick up routines will be discussed.
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  #10  
Old 11-28-2012, 07:18 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Blackcat31 View Post

Transition times such as drop off and pick-up can be a difficult time for children. Please try to make these times as short as possible. If there are things you need to discuss with me, please call and set up a time where we can talk uninterrupted. If your child is experiencing any separation anxiety issues, please rest assured that I will do everything necessary to welcome your child and make their transition from parent to childcare a comfortable and pleasant one. If your child does not calm down and join the rest of the group within a reasonable amount of time, you will be called to assist or pick up if necessary.

Behavior for some children during these times can result in needing to be disciplined. Should this occur, you will need to be the one in charge. As your child's parent, you need to be the ultimate authority. If it becomes necessary for me to step in and discipline your child, alternate drop off/pick up routines will be discussed.
Love this!
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  #11  
Old 11-28-2012, 08:21 AM
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To be honest, it really depends on the parent. I enjoy sitting and enjoying the company of some and don't mind them hanging out for as long as 30 mins. Others, I just about toss the child out the door.
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Old 11-28-2012, 08:29 AM
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I had a family that had very long, difficult pickups. There were 3 of them under the age of 5. We did goodbye outside for a long time. Once the 5 year old went to kindy this year, I thought it would be better as he seemed to be the instigator. So I offered to let them have another go at saying goodbye inside. Big mistake. On day one she brought him inside with her and he took his shoes off (!!) and ran inside to play. Are you kidding me? So as he ran by, I said to him that he was here to pick up his sisters and to head back over to the entryway. Put his shoes back on and wait quietly for his sisters to get ready to leave. He then began to cry (!!)

The next day, he came in and took off his shoes and I reminded him it was goodbye time and he was not staying at daycare. He began to goof around and roll around on the floor, flinging his sisters backpack and generally behaving like a pest. I said to his mom at this point that if he couldn't behave himself he couldn't come inside. (I understand leaving him in the car alone might be a safety issue) So I recommend she let him sit on my front step, well within eyesight of her and me.

Now he stays in the car. Goodbyes have been fine, although the middle has started to act up at goodbyes, so we may switch back to goodbye outside.

For me, this time of day can be a challenge, so I tolerate quite a bit of ruckus in general, although no deliberate rule breaking. But families that refuse to take charge need an alernative plan, like goodbye outside.
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Old 11-28-2012, 08:30 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sharlan View Post
To be honest, it really depends on the parent. I enjoy sitting and enjoying the company of some and don't mind them hanging out for as long as 30 mins. Others, I just about toss the child out the door.
Ditto on this...

I have some parents that I like to talk with and enjoy getting to know. These are the ones that can control their kids and have no issues putting their child in check if needed.

Others, I hand the kids and run for the hills, saying good-bye as fast as I can to get them out of here.

I also have my parents pick up times spread out over 15min increments so that they are not here at the same time picking up.

I also wanted to share this from my PBH:


Per licensing, State and insurance, all children on the daycare premises will count towards capacity. Children that are not enrolled in the Daycare (siblings, friends or other family) will not be permitted to play on the premises at any time. ***X DC will not be responsible for children not enrolled. When dropping off or picking up, you must stay with your non enrolled child at all times. Should you need to talk with the provider for an extended period of time, please schedule an appointment to talk at a later time. Please be aware that ***DC does not cater to infants and therefore do not provide an infant safe environment.

Last edited by daycare; 11-28-2012 at 08:34 AM.
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Old 11-28-2012, 08:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sharlan View Post
To be honest, it really depends on the parent. I enjoy sitting and enjoying the company of some and don't mind them hanging out for as long as 30 mins. Others, I just about toss the child out the door.
I would have to say this is how I handle it, too. I always tell them if I am running somewhere after the day is done. I enjoy chatting with some of them, and we are friends, so sometimes it is a nice break for a quick adult chat.
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Old 11-28-2012, 09:02 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Achelea View Post
In the morning after mom/dad takes off their coats and shoes I take the child and say lets go play! Bye mom bye dad see you tonight and walk away leaving them stand there.

At the end of the day I did have parents picking up & after me handing over their kid and them doing the hoochie kootchie thing for about 2 minutes and telling the kid how they missed them all day they would then stand by the door and talk while the kid would run off and do all kinds of things I never permitted. They would say nothing! Climbing on things, up on my couches where they are not allowed during the days, touching things that they know they are not allowed to touch, even trying to get into my fridge and cupboards!)

They would stand there and talk while I was chasing their kid around continually taking them away from stuff and wishing they would just leave! I am tired by this time of day and I am done with chasing your kid around, leave already!!!!! Parents are oblivious and sometimes so stupid!! Plus your kid is NOT like this during the day!


Now I have gated off an area right by the door so that I can put the child down over the gate. The area is about the size of a pack n play maybe a bit bigger about 4 x 4 feet square so there is no room for the kid to move or run around.

Parents leave MUCH more quickly now because when their kid is hanging off of THEM and causing them grief rather than me it is a different story!
yup, make it their problem. my parents leave quickly because otherwise they are stuck in my front yard, chasing kids in the freezing cold LOL

if you make things too comfy, they will come in and chill out while you are still on duty. i also dont allow siblings into the house or daycare room at all!
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  #16  
Old 11-28-2012, 10:10 AM
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Yesterday i had a set of parents want to hang out forever. Their kids were trying to go upstairs, in the cupboards, throwing toys, dragging kitchen chairs (the kid ones) into the living room and tearing books. The parents did nothing. The little girl was swinging a chair around and almost hit my baby in the face, and they laughed.

I charge until they walk out the door, because I'm still taking care of their kids.
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Old 11-28-2012, 10:15 AM
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The kids ALWAYS break rules in front of parents for some reason. The other day I had kids run over to my Christmas tree and start taking ornaments off of it, and picking up the presents under it, while walking on the carpet with their shoes on... all in front of the parents. What gets me more, is that the parents really didnt say a word.

None of them do that during the day. It is a game of, "Let's see what I can get away with in front of mom and dad."

And the longer they linger the worse the kids are.
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Old 11-28-2012, 10:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bunnyslippers View Post
I would have to say this is how I handle it, too. I always tell them if I am running somewhere after the day is done. I enjoy chatting with some of them, and we are friends, so sometimes it is a nice break for a quick adult chat.
I'm in this camp, too. But, if I have somewhere to be, or it's dragging on too long, I just say "Sorry, I can't visit today...too much going on!"
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