I have a little peanut here who gets diaper rash badly, and often. DCM seems to think this is in some way negligence on my part. Any time it has happened before, I get a whole lot of attitude and instructions on how to prevent it, right down to letting her go without a diaper to let air get at her (this baby is 13 months old and crawling everywhere...I can't let her go without a diaper.

Yesterday, she dropped off, explaining that DCG was on antibiotics that make her poop constantly, for an infection. She then said, "I don't care what you do, she CAN NOT GET A RASH THIS TIME." I literally changed this little one every 30 minutes, all day long, regardless of poop being present. Slathered desitin on like wallpaper paste, at every change.

Same drill today, except today, she looks like she is getting a rash. I know DCM is going to be angry, and will give me a HUGE attitude. Any idea on how to handle this? I know it is coming, and feel pretty helpless. I seriously couldn't have been more diligent. This baby just has super sensitive skin!!!! So not in the mood for the attitude.

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I find Vaseline helps best as a barrier and I'd show Mom a log of every diaper change. The other option, which is what I'd be tempted to do with an attitude like that is tell mom you cannot guarantee she won't get a rash pooping that frequently and you cannot take that amount of time away from the thee kids in your care so the child needs to stay home until her stomach is no longer unsettled.

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I would absolutely not put up with this garbage. I would let mom know what I am doing and then what her accusations are doing to our working relationship. If she really thinks that you are purposefully neglecting a child, she needs to find new daycare. either she trusts you to do what you can or she doesnt. there is no way i would get all stressed out about a mom being upset over this.

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THIS!

Antibiotic poops are notoriously acidic, I have one dcb who seems sensitive to desitin and his rashes have improved since we have nixed it. I would toss on yogurt, or a liquid maalox mixed with cornstarch to neutralize the acid and tell Mom that you will do what you can to prevent but that diaper rashes are a part of being in diapers, if she doesn't like that, then she can keep LO home until her diahrea has improved!

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If she is on an antibiotic then that could be a Yeast infection, I don't know that you can make that go away with desitin.

I would change every hour, apply cream and keep a log. I cannot do any more than that and there is no way I would let a baby go without a diaper.

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If its that bad all of the time, she can get a rx from her pedi for nystatin cream. I had a baby once whos rash only responded to that.

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I know how you feel, whenever my DCK's get a rash I feel SO bad but I do diaper changes really often and it's not negligence on my part. Some kids ARE prone to more rashes. There are a lot of things that could contribute to this: diet, the brand of diaper, or just simply sensitive skin. The bad thing is antibiotics can make this worse or cause yeast infections so the fact that this DCM knows she is having more frequent bowel movements and has said that to you-ouch! Maybe try something other than desitin like aquaphor? I also recommend lots of yogurt. Since this is an ongoing issue there could be other things to factor in like the baby not having enough "good" bacteria, a good probiotic would be something she could discuss with her Dr.

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Exactly this.

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Do you send home any type of daily note? I do and make a note of all diaper changes and any issues - I have two boys in my care that can *look* at a piece of fruit and get diaper rash so I feel your pain! That way every change, diaper cream use, etc is all documented.

When mom comes in today head her off at the pass - "Mom, we have changed Susie 47 times today, and slathered her up with diaper cream. We still noticed some redness and at this point I'm concerned she may have an allergy that is causing the redness. What has the doctor said about this?" If mom says she hasn't brought it up, make it clear that this is something that needs be mentioned. Maybe you pushing for a doctor's visit might get her to realize that you are not the enemy.
And I'd be sure to be shocked, SHOCKED that this is something so serious but yet she hasn't done anything about it "Gee, I'm kind of suprised given how badly Susie's bottom can get you haven't mentioned it to the doctor, the only time I ever saw a child's bottom get this bad, they wound up having dairy allergies."

At the end of the day though, if I were doing all I could do to prevent something and a parent was pissy with me, I might pull the old "you seem unhappy here, maybe you will be happier somewhere else" card.

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I'd bag every single diaper and hand them to her at pick up so she can see and smell how many times you changed her during the day.

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I agree with the Vaseline. I put Desitin on and then slather on a ton of Vaseline.

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Thanks everyone! I will try the desitin and vaseling. I actually did document how many times I changed her today. Between 7:30 and 2:30 - 16 times so far today, and at 9 of those were poop!!!!! Holy cow!

I know she will give me the attitude. Just another beautiful day in the neighborhood!

I knew you would all help me get some guts. Thanks again ~

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Be blunt and stop letting mom push you around.

It is not reasonable or realistic for mom to expect you to change baby's diaper every half hour or let her run around with no diaper.

Via email:

Dear mom,

Just dropping a line to discuss baby's pretty consistent diaper rash. You're probably as concerned and frustrated as I have been about it lately!

I'm not sure if it's an issue with sensitive skin, allergies, teething or what but I went so far as to change her every half hour applying barrier creams liberally around the clock the last couple of days and that still doesn't seem to be helping much. Changing her that often has also been quite a hindrance when it comes to taking care of the other children in my care. There is diaper changing protocol I have to follow that is far more involved than just taking a diaper off and on and I'm finding myself spending nearly the entire day in the bathroom! For obvious reasons, I just can't continue to accommodate that. Per licensing regulations I also cannot allow her to run around with no diaper. While it might work wonderfully at home, with her being in that go go go stage it simply wouldn't be sanitary here.

I'm not sure if you have any other ideas or if her doctor has suggested anything else I can try? At this point I'm wondering if this is an issue with an allergy to dairy, her brand of diapers, her wipes, the barrier cream itself, even her med? If the med itself is causing the issue will giving her some sort of probiotic help to rebalance her system?

I am really not sure what else to do at this point. Some children just have very sensitive skin and there's not much I can do about that here aside from applying barrier cream during regular changes. Unfortunately I sense that you're thinking that her diaper rashes are my fault and I'm very concerned about that. I hope I am just being silly about that but hope you know you can always be honest with me. If there is a problem let's sort it out! Feel free to drop a line back or we can simply talk more about this at pick up.

Provider"

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I would send her home. That is WAY to much pooping at daycare. She could easily get dehydrated and Mom needs to be one-on-oneing her to make sure she doesn't.

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Individually.

Bonus points for counting them out in front of her and exclaiming that even you didn't realize how many there were.

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I have a boy that pop 3 to 4 times a day almost every day (been with me for 3 months). His rash sometimes is so bad that I cannot even use wipes to clean him and I have to give him a bath every diaper change instead. I have to check his behind every 10 minutes because his poop will go unnoticed (don't stink like the others) and he will get a bad rash if not changed immediately. Also this boy is the heaviest kid I ever had and all the diaper changing and bathing is giving me back and arm pains every day. I'm SOOO tired of this problem! But my mom is very sweet and struggles with the same issue...so at least that helps ...

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Holy cow, that IS way too much pooping! Please send that child home! That is so disruptive to everyone elses day.

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She needs her own adult

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I agree with this. I would also have a little fun with this. Really play up the diaper rash. Be VERY concerned, perplexed. At least three times as concerned as she is about this. Make up a detailed dietary assessment and stool sample form for her to have at home. She must have the entire thing filled out for the week before the child is allowed in care for the next week, for your "research" into this very serious problem. Save the diapers, pass them to her out the door, and make sure she counts them. You have no idea what's going on because you take this rash very seriously and change her this often. There must be something going on at home, because you are SURE that they change her that often at home and are feeding her nothing but good things. Make HER write out dietary assessments at home, make charts and pie graphs in fun colors so you can figure this out together because you are so concerned about this. Have her analyze the stool samples in each diaper at home and mark it on a chart. Have her analyze these things on her own time and then see how important being condescending to you is. And then, after weeks of "analyzing" I would let her know that I still couldn't figure it out, so she will need to get a doctor's note before allowing her back in care since she has an undiagnosed problem and there is just too much liability with a serious case such as her daughter's. I fully believe in keeping "high and mighty" parents busy with busywork. They're leaving in June anyway, right? They are treating you badly because they think they can. Why not have a little fun? I would.

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Wow, just read the responses that posted while I was posting. She pooped 9 times? That IS serious, agreed with the others. She shouldn't be there. I wouldn't let her back in without a doctor's note saying she is okay to be back.

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Does she ever come with a diaper rash from over the weekend? I would be checking her 1st thing when she gets there so if that happens you can be the one to mention it to mom instead of the other way around.

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Lots of good advice here. I especially like the bagging up the diapers idea & sending home.

I've got a little guy who has very sensitive skin & he responds to either Desitin Extra Strength mixed with Maalox or athletes foot cream depending on what's causing it (either yeast or just irritation).

Antibiotics can cause and/or exacerbate both the rash and diarrhea.

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lol! gotta give you one for that, lady!

Not saying I'd do it...but it's fun to dream...

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There's a DCG in my center that always seems to have horrible and very painful diaper rashes and her mom comes in screaming every morning that she isn't changed often enough. We made every effort to keep DCG changed and dry but it still wasn't enough. Then we noticed a pattern. Every Monday, mom would come in complaining about us allowing DCG to keep getting diaper rashes. Then, on the mornings where DCG is one of the first children to school, mom would complain about DCG getting diaper rash the day before. That's when we finally figured out that DCG always comes in early with the previous nights diaper full of poop. When mom brings her early, she rushes to DCGs class to change her in order to "complain" about we aren't taking care of her. After she was shown the video of her doing this, she stopped for a while

. She started back with the complaints a few weeks later so we asked if we could take a pic of the rash each time they changed her so mom would have the actual time of the diaper change. She said yes but it backfired on her. She now had proof that DCG was being changed like she asked and proof of the rash clearing as the day went on.

After a few more weeks of this, mom had a new complaint-we are using to many diapers a day and she can't afford to buy them that often. Well lady, you wanted her changed every 30 mins so who's diapers were we supposed to use. Some people

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^^ what a piece of work.

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that is an awesome idea!

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then mom didn't read the instructions that the pharmasicst gave her, I would see if you can print her out another one. Antibiotics is natorious in giving kids diarrhea, its horrible. I found that no matter what you do, its hard to control. Don't use any powders because they will make it worse.

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Not only do antibiotics often cause diarrhea, but they can also lead to things like yeast infections. It's pretty common for our babies to break out in diaper rashes when it happens. For an active diaper rash make sure to be using the purple tube. Vaseline or the blue tube can help make a barrier.

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Antibiotics are known to increase amounts of candida albicans yeast in the body. Uncontrolled yeast can present as thrush & cause nasty nearly incurable, painful diaper rash. I wonder if the parents have talked to their doctor about this possibility. If it's not thrush, maybe the baby has a sensitivity to a chemical in the diaper or ointment. I know cloth isn't for everyone, but it generally reduces the amount of diaper rash. If cloth is impractical for the family & you, maybe a more natural ointment? Coconut oil is amazing & useful for so many things. CJ's Butter & Grandma Els are also good choices. Good luck!

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Oh, I'm not joking. I have done this before and would totally do it again. The OP is closing in June. She really has nothing to lose. These parents are treating her like the dirt they have scraped off their shoe. I know it is not just this issue that they are giving her trouble about. I totally and unequivocally believe that this is the best way to deal with condescending, snotty people like this. It works, trust me and they are caught WAY OFF GUARD by this approach. It's hilarious.

That being said, 9 poops and 16 diaper changes is ridiculous and wouldn't be allowed to stay in my care anyway until they got checked out and ok'ed by a doctor. But if the kid was a normal pooper and just had a lot of rashes, and I knew I was doing my job, then I would recommend this to the OP.

Unfortunately she posted the other info while I was slowly typing my first response, so I missed it!

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What is this child eating?

tons of fruit?
Juice?

Try bag balm, sounds like a citric acid issue- very common at this age. Alternate your diaper creams, Desitan, Butt paste, Whatever works best for this child.

I would tell the parent, it is pretty common, and that you change her often and never leave her in a soiled diaper, you can't air her out for sanitary reasons but to definitely do this at home when she can. Explain to her that this would be happening at home and that it is not from lack of good care. First time Mom? You can also mention maybe taking her to the Dr. to see if another prescription would work better for her or if it something besides diaper rash.

Best-

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I agree with all the advice I have read so far.

Antibiotics can do this to the little bum bums! Don't let a parent make you feel that your not doing your job- especially if you know that you are.

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vaseline is good but bag balm works better- esp for acid

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your changing her that much??? No, no way, I agree with this above--- If a child had nine poops in a day that would be cause to send home. Mom needs to figure out what is going on with that and get her to the Ped.

Don't be afraid to talk to your parents. That is part of this job. A parent should not be allowed to make you feel the way she has been to you. You are the only one that can change that. Start there--- beyond backbone, you have to be able to communicate to the parent and with confidence. 16 changes is way too much diaper time for a day. Your making my bum ache at the thought of being changed that much.....
wish you luck

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How did pick up go?

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Nan,

I already thought this and knew you would pipe in with this

That is Moms very wish, but most likely not her pocket books wish-

I say make it known to this mom that you take care of other children and you are not a one on one daycare. That is a Nanny and you don't offer that service. I would do this nicely.

I would also not bag up and give her the diapers---- I would want to and it would be screaming in my head to do this but No- Gross, not sanitary, and not something I want to deal with or even come down to on that level.......gives a whole knew meaning to poop deck-

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make sure to update us on this

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Yes, how did pick-up go?

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It went ok. I explained to her that I am aware of the risk of diaper rash with her little one, and that I did everything in my control to prevent it from happening. She expressed her concern, but really...I am ONE woman!!!! The little one is on a really strong antibiotic for a blood infection - cellulitis. The frequent poops were expected, but the rest of it is just a headache.

I am a really good communicator, and I typically do all right with it. This dcf, though, is really unrealistic in their expectations. I am just tired!!!

56 more days!!!

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I would TOTALLY bag up and give her the diapers. It's not unsanitary, they'd be bagged. I wouldn't be going "down to that level" This Mom is basically accusing the provider of not changing the child enough. No matter what the provider says Mom is not going to beleive her and will continue to blame her UNTIL she SHOWS her that she IS changing her frequently.

Gross, Yes. But, Mom needs a wake up call.

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My daughter also gets a diaper rash whenever shes on an antibiotic & i use a mixture of 1/3 desitin max strength,1/3 lotrimin,& 1/3 triple antibiotic ointment-works like a charm.

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I have one like that except mom is great. it got worse when dcg was eating cuties this winter AND I was also serving manerine oranges some days. We started talking and both dut her WAy back on any citrus fruits.

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I see your point, but if I have to babysit the parent then I would just not rather have them as clients. Been there and done that. Being an adult I am able to verbally tell the parent how many times I have changed the child, if the parent needs more then that they are not the right fit for me. I don't want to go to that level. I want them in the trash can. She can do a diaper count if she would like, but I am not playing games with the poop diapers- IF I have to Micro manage this adult parent at this level- no I am not going to do that. I might be willing to write down every time I changed the child and if it was a one or a two- especially an infant, or new client but if I have been working with this adult she is going to either trust that I am giving good care, see that I am giving good care or find someone else to hassle like this...She wants a Nanny at daycare pay---- Nooooooooooo Crystal it would be going through my head to this ..........but No I am not going to actually hand her a bag with soiled diapers. Actually most likely other things would be going through my head..........silly me

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citric acid really does a number on kids.........and most wipes have citric acid in them too

I am an adult and I can't combine sauce with oranges, orange juice. It just doesn't like me. I break out in hives.

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Don't suffer those last days, tell her how it is at your home. Nicely of course but stop letting her make you feel the way that you do. This can be carried on and out of the daycare world and into other avenues of your life. Explain to her that your a group care not a one on one care home. If she wants that service maybe a Nanny would be a better fit for her. This will help her in the long run too.
Best-

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Take the strings out of tea bags, wet 3 of them and throw them in her diapers...then invoice mom for the teabags! These work awesome to reduce diaper rash!! I use them on my kids when they have very red bums. I put them in at night and by morning it is mostly dried up!

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Just a suggestion here....I was told no cornstarch on the bum when you have a rash while taking an antibiotic. The diaper rash is more likely than not a yeast infection and the corn starch actually "feeds" the yeast and causes it to get .worse. I know some people will use powder on the bum as well.......please check to see if your powder is made with corn starch in it

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Also known as Utter (or is it spelled udder) Balm, or Butt Cream or Butt Paste. And it does work.

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There could be other underlying issues than just negligence. It could be the diapers (I've had this happen), or what she is eating. The Desitin could also not work for her. Has she taken her to the doctor for this concern? If not, I would recommend her to do so. I do agree keep a very detailed description for this child to give to mom at the end of the day.

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This is one of the reasons I do not put anything on a rash without the parent's knowledge/consent. I know many of us have years of experience when it comes to diaper changes (and probably more than most of the parents) but it could come back to bite you if a parent is already upset about a rash and it turns out what you were using to "treat" it was actually making it worse

I also missed the part where the child had 9 BM's. I agree that they would have been sent home.

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Egads, my husband almost died with cellulitis. He was in a near coma and in the hospital for a week. She should thank her lucky stars they have her on an antibiotic for her particular cellulitis. It can be tricky.

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yeast, exactly! Pediatrician can prescribe a medicated paste/ointment for it.

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I would not take a picture of a baby's diaper rash regardless of having the parent's permission. Too many potential problems could come from that one.

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One of my DCG's just had a bad rash.The DR.suggested putting vaseline on diaper then desitin on baby this worked pretty quickly.

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I'm sure the info is still relevant but this thread is from early 2013...just in case anyone is expecting OP to reply.

OP is no longer an active member.

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