I have a first interview scheduled right now and so far , no show. How long do you wait? The interview was for 5:15/5:30 and it's 5:30 on the nose right now.

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Well my recent experience was I waited 15 or 20 minutes and then called to be told "oh I forgot to call you" they rescheduled for the next day and then called and said "oh we changed our minds we don't need childcare". I guess go ahead and call them and join the circus I live in lol.

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I'm stubborn. I refuse to call them. I figure they want me, they should keep their appointment. Our subdivision is very confusing, so I'm hoping maybe they're just driving in circles. I do have things to do tonight though, so I hate to sit here and wait too long. What's the norm 15 minutes?

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ugh just pulled in 10 minutes late.

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I would wait 30 if I was going to wait, but would hope if they are confused they would call. To me the fact they haven't called rules that out.

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Great opportunity to explain the importance of being punctual.

I can NEVER resist commenting on a person's lateness as it is a sign of disrespect in my book.

I "get" running late, but I don't understand running late without notifying the party waiting for you.

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Maybe they were lost. I went somewhere on Sunday that I already knew where it was and still ended up taking a wrong turn and not finding the parking area making myself 10 minutes late. It happens. Hopefully there are no other red flags.

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Now that they showed up, is anyone willing to share what they say when people are late? I always feel like I come off rude, or mean, or snotty when I comment.

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If they don't mention it, I usually say something like "I allocate 30 minutes for interviews, since we got to a late start, please forgive me for talking faster than usual and stop me if you have any questions."

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I say something like, did you have a hard time finding me? You should've called! Nice and sweet of course. It shows that I noticed they were late without being b!tchy about it. If there is a red flag during the interview, I don't enroll. Tardiness plus one red flag is enough for me.

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Interview done. I asked her as she came in if she got lost and she says "oh no not at all". Have no idea which way this will go. She said that she's also on a waiting list for a center. Her husband was working, so he didn't come, but she said his concern was how I keep the other kids from her and how did I keep them separate. I told her that it's all about supervision and the kids don't leave my eyesight. She mentioned that he had said to her, how do you know they're not watching tv all day. I do have a husband and 2 kids, so I told her that sometimes they may come here in the morning and Good Morning America might be on the TV, but it does not mean that I'm sitting watching it, that my husband does live here and he may be watching it. Who knows. We'll see.

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Sounds to picky for me. I mean my husband is a truck driver and home for 34 hours each week if we are lucky. If he is at home and wants to watch TV, I am not telling him no!

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Exactly. I told her also that this is my home first and daycare second and that if my 2 kids or husband want to watch tv, then they would watch tv and that it did not mean that me or the kids were watching it all day. I also told her that yes, they do watch Mickey Mouse or Bubble guppies or something similar when I am making lunch. Our livingroom/dining and kitchen are all one open space, so that way I know where they are and what I'm doing when I'm cooking. Go to a center honey where 1 caregiver is watching your infant and 3 other ones. See how often she's held. (no offense to centers)

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What does she mean by "how I keep the other kids from her and how did I keep them separate"?

Is her husband afraid the other kids will----oh no no no-----touch little precious? I don't understand this (unless it's illness or bad behavior related). Does he know centers are allowed higher ratios?

Oh sorry, I didn't realize it was an infant, must have been posting at the same time....

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The baby is 6 weeks old now, but wouldn't be coming for another month. I don't know, when she was talking about it, she was looking around like I would keep the baby in the living room and the kids in teh playroom. Ok, that's fine, but how am I supposed to watch them all then? Are you going to like it when she's 2 and in the playroom and I'm in the livingroom watching someone else's infant? The way she acted, it was that he was afraid that the kids would be hanging on her and mauling her. Because I allow that.

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Uhhh exactly. I would pass on that family no matter what just because of that comment.

I cannot guarantee complete separateness nor would I want to.

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I don't like when a parent, mom or dad, doesn't come but the parent interviewing keeps saying what the parent NOT THERE is worried about That is a red flag for me!!!!!! The things the mom said the dad was concerned about was probably her concern, not his.

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Exactly. Lots of red flags with this one.

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Some people just have no idea. They really don't know much about parenting a 6wk old let alone 6-8 children of all ages plus our own. How do you keep the kids away from her? Hmmmm, maybe you're right there caring for the children and wouldn't allow it. LOL "Where will she be when you're changing everyone else's diapers or washing hands and prepping/serving food?" would be a more appropriate question I guess.

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Maybe you said, but I assume this is their first child? Are they fairly young? Mid 20's-ish?

Please put yourselves in their position. This is their first experience with a baby. This is their first experience putting a baby in a virtual "stranger's" hands. Maybe their baby is the first in both families, and they don't have any frame of reference for how childcare works. Maybe they've heard stories of negative childcare situations and they're just being diligent. Maybe they just wanted to see how you'd react and respond to the tougher questions -- to see if you came across like you have a plan and have your stuff together, or if you just stammered and stuttered out your answer.

I don't know.. I just think (PLEASE, no offense to anyone!) that you're all being a little too hard on them. Just my opinion. YOU (not speaking of anyone in particular here ) have done this for years and years. YOU know that you are a safe environment for all your clients' kids. YOU know that their baby will receive the best care that you are capable of giving her. But THEY don't know ANY of that.

I don't blame them AT ALL for asking the tough (or even dumb) questions. Maybe the questions came off as "duh... I'm not going to let the toddlers maul your baby!!", but they're just trying to set their minds at ease and make sure they have the BEST care for their baby. Who wouldn't want that???

Heck, I had a mom 15 years ago who asked "You don't shake them, do you?" Yes, it's a silly question, but I really can't blame her for being scared. First babies are rough!!! Oh, and I watched the baby for 13 years!!! Still friends with them.

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I think that you are not far off on your comments. I guess what started a negative opinion is first of all being late and secondly, if dad had so many concerns, why did he think it not important to be there. Yes he was working, but she could have scheduled a time for him to be there too. She also had questions about my husband because he is self-employed. She wanted to know how much he was working from home. I was also bothered by the fact that she kept mentioning the center that she was on a waiting list for. She said she was going to call and see how far back on the list she was. This kept bothering me because i felt like last ditch option and the second they called her, she would be gone.

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I would be offended also. I get the new parent thing, but I always figure if they are showing signs of not trusting me or not really wanting their kids to be here, I am not going to enroll them. I just don't like not being trusted. I also would hate feeling like the last ditch thing and then knowing that I was going to get the boot when the desired spot opened. Not saying it wouldn't happen anyway but don't keep rubbing it in.

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Yes, I get what both of you are saying. But we need to realize that the way it comes off to US is from our experience with multitudes of interviews over many years. This is their FIRST time. They don't know the protocol. They don't know that certain questions or statements might offend you or put up red flags, and are therefore "taboo".

In terms of the center vs. home daycare... I think a lot of people would assume and believe that a commercial center would be more accountable. In other words, there are many employees who see what the other employees do on a daily basis. At a home daycare, there is usually just you. No accountability in some parents' eyes. And I'm sure they've heard stories of home providers who watched tv and ate bon-bons, or sat the kids in front of cartoons all day. I'm not surprised by a general mistrust of private home daycare. I think it's a very valid concern, and one that should be brought up. Also, the parents don't think about licensing. They don't know what we went through to get ours, nor what we go through to keep it. If they knew what we know, they wouldn't need to ask those questions. But they simply don't know.

Listen, I'm not trying to defend or validate their feelings. I just try to give people the benefit of the doubt and see things from THEIR perspective. No offense to anyone at all. Honest! I took a chance on the skittish mom who asked if I shake the babies. LOL. She was my best and favorite client, and the baby, as I mentioned, is now grown up, a freshman in high school, and still a great friend. There was an issue when the girl was about 3 yrs old where the dad got really upset thinking I wasn't upfront about an outbreak of lice. (I won't go into the story, but I did everything I was supposed to do). And the mom, although she tried to be "understanding", pretty much went along with dad on the issue. It stung, but I overlooked it and it all turned out fine.

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