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Parents and Guardians Forum>Question About Teachers Alone with Children
HRH 10:18 AM 08-28-2007
My child is 17 months old. She is in a classroom with two full time teachers, and about 8-10 children. Teachers are scheduled to arrive at 7:00 each day. However, recently, they have not been there at 7:00, 7:05, 7:10, or even later. When this happens, one of the owners/operators (the husband) fills in and watches after the class. So he is alone with the children until a teacher arrives.

My wife and I (and others ) are not happy at all. I know many will point out that it is wrong to think a man is more likely to abuse--I know studies will back you up on that thought. But my main question is this......should one person be alone with all the children. But I will go ahead and ask, would any of you have a problem with this man taking care of a class of almost all, baby girls?

I addressed this situation with the wife, and she was very defensive as usual, and did not even apologize for her staff's tardiness.
Unregistered 02:00 PM 08-28-2007
Yes I would be concerned, not only because of the male part, but because that's too many children for one person too watch. Where is the wife when he's alone with these children? Why aren't the other workers there at the appointed time for work? How high is the staff turn over rate at your daycare? I would be very concerned and I wouldn't leave my child until the regular worker/workers came in. If you do that, it won't take long for the owner too get her staff in line.
Unregistered 03:26 AM 08-29-2007
Thanks for the reply and support. The male owner (husband) actually called me at home last night, beginning with "I hear you have some concerns about me being in the room".

I once again got defensive answers, justifying their stance on only having one person (him) in the whole building from 6:30-7:00. We are frustrated, and will at least look into other options.

He said that there is no need for any staff to be there at that point. I, of course pointed out that that was his opinion.
Kathy 11:43 AM 08-29-2007
I wonder what the ratio for family/home daycare is in your state. You did not say what state you reside in. I would like to check what your statesí guidelines are. It may be that he is considered an adequate caregiver as long as he has a high school degree and no criminal record. I viewed several statesí requirements on and it seems fairly simple to be a caregiver in many states.
Unregistered 03:38 AM 08-30-2007
Alabama. And they told me he has a masters degree in Human & Family and Development.
Kathy 12:09 PM 08-30-2007
He sounds well qualified to watch the children. Alabama state reads "Child Care Workers or Teachers: Must be at least 19 years old and have high school diploma or GED"

I guess at some point we need to trust our instincts which is hard these days with all the bad news stories we hear.
jmom 07:41 AM 09-24-2007
I think that is an odd opinion since you have obviously done background checks on the staff/owners at the daycare???? At least I would have hoped that you have. If someone is a child predator I can guarantee you that they don't have to be a teacher in the center to come in contact with your child. If you are questioning the owner/director then you really should just take your child out of the center.
Kathy 11:33 AM 09-24-2007
I believe the original post is from a parent who is concerned and not the owner/director. I think a background check should always be applied to any childcare worker in a center but how does a parent know if a family/home daycare operator has a bad background? Does the state check when licensing them? All states donít require registration for family daycare businesses. I don't think parents are getting on the web and paying the $49 for a background search are checking either. The responsibility should not shift from the state or operator to the parent. I guess all good parents could do background checks on all daycare personnel and why not check out our friends while we are at it. I mean where does it stop?

At some point we need to be aware of the daycare and surroundings, watch the manner of those involved, talk with other parents and neighbors and use our instincts.
Unregistered 12:49 PM 10-04-2007
In our state, all family members 18 or older must have a criminal background check and pass. That check and having a high school diploma or equivelant makes him qualified. It is their business, if you don't like it, find somewhere you are comfortable to take your little one, otherwise, trust your provider. That's what you had to do when you enrolled your child. My husband is a stand in a lot of times for me. None of the parents here have a problem with it. And he is the sweetest, gentelest man I know, and the children love him.
Unregistered 03:11 AM 10-13-2007
In my state, and in most others I am sure, if you are a childcare center, or home daycare, that has a certificate of compliance every staff person has to have a criminal and child abuse clearence, thats a regulation. Just because he is a man doesnt mean he is a preditor. Some of my best teachers were men. In my state if there are 2 or more children in the facilty there must be at least 2 staff people. So if he is in ratio, he is allowed to be in the classroom caring for children alone, just as long as somewhere in the daycare there is another person. If he has alot of kids alone and is over ratio with no other staff people there at all, then that is against least in PA it is.Hope everything works out for you.
Unregistered 08:30 PM 11-12-2008
It seems like he's qualified to watch the kids, especially for a short time before the other satff arrive. If this were a woman with the same qualifications, there probably wouldn't be an issue. If a woman watches children she's being the typical motherly woman, when a man is good with kids, he MUST be a pervert! Come on! Is your husband good with your kids? Is he molesting them?! If you have kids come over later and spend the night with your kids, will you worry if you have to leave them alone in the house with him? Probably not, because believe it or not, some men just like kids for the same reason women do, and it's not because he's a child molester. Men can be great role models for kids, and let's face it, a lot of kids need a good guy in their life! Why not sit in a day or two and watch how he interacts with the children instead of assuming he can't handle it? Seriously, it's people like you that scare good men away from children - they're afraid someone like you is going to accuse them of doing something they would never do, so they stay as far away from children as possible when that MAN could've been a great teacher to them!
lilbiddapopcorn 03:14 PM 11-16-2008
I just don't understand...just because he's a man he can't be alone with girls? Did it ever occur to you that one of the women might be a pedophile? I just don't get this type of thinking....child molesters don't just become child molesters one day because they were left alone with little girls. Maybe he genuinely likes kids. Maybe he's a good guy and you're insinuating that he's attracted to children, and yea! That'd make me defensive too! I mean, can you blame these people for being defensive? After all, he is qualified, and you're only targeting him because he's male. That's not right. I hope for the daycare owners' sake you DO take your kids out because they deserve parents who appreciate that their daycare providers have that kind of education and commitment to children.
momof3 06:13 AM 12-11-2008
I sometimes think men can be better with kids than women. They are more laid back and fun, while we women are usually stressed out and highstrung. I personally requested my son have the only male teacher in the second grade this year. He had had a pretty incompetant teacher for first grade (a woman) who has been teaching for 30+ years, so she is not required to meet the current BOE standards. He has been the BEST teacher my son has had so far. I know this is a school setting, but really what's the difference, he's alone with these kids most of the day. He is patient, and fun, and the kids really relate to him. He's married and has kids in college. Maybe you should get tom know him a bit better to feel comfortable. ***However, if you have a gut feeling about him for some reason, and he is the owners husband. Then maybe you should go elsewhere where you are more comfortable.
Tags:biased, gender - one sided, male providers, men in daycare
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