So have a dcg (4yo) who has been coming here for a little over a year. I have never had a child mope so much. She loves laying on the floor dramatically and making annoyed whining noises. I move her to the "baby area" a rug with some soft toys whenever she does this. She had gotten better for a while, but recently - the whining and drama is driving me crazy. I don't let her see how much she gets to me, but man I don't like this kid. I am really trying to give extra positive attention and verbal affection when she is doing well, but its super hard. She is super smart, very verbal but emotionally acts out like a 2yo. I wouldn't think it so weird for an only child, but she has a younger brother who is so happy and easy. I Rinse and Repeat the "baby area" but she is staying in there for up to 15 min, refusing to go play toys once she has calmed down.

Suggestions? Words of hope lol. I have one more full year with this kid before Kindy. Great family. I know they aren't enabling her. They have really good logical consequences and follow through.

Reply

I wouldn't ignore it. Why should it drive you crazy? I'd tell her firmly that "I don't like it when you lie on the floor and make those noises so stop it. Do you understand me?" Then I'd sit her at a table and give her an activity of MY choice. If she is smart, is she challenged enough? Give her something like her own box of art supplies or some play dough and let her play by herself. If you have one of those kiddie tape recorders, I'd be tempted to let her whine into that and then sit her in time out and have her listen to it. Not sure if that is PC though.

Reply

I don't completely ignore it. I mainly ignore her "look how unhappy I am" face. She has lost the privilege of lying down other than nap time. I will assign her areas to play when she is having trouble but hasn't melted down yet, she will often just sit there with a look of despair

I have her practice saying "Yes Ms CC" instead of the whine noise EVERY SING TIME. Its 20 times a day. It just doesn't seem to be getting better after weeks

Reply

I used to have a dcb4 who would whine and throw himself on the floor, banging his fists.
It would annoy me to no end.
One day, I was in such a good mood that when he started the behavior, I really didn't want to let it get me down, so I decided to copy him.
Yep, both of us on the floor, banging our fist, yelling "waaaa".
Of course, I had a smile on my face and the other preschoolers around us were just laughing away at the sight of me on the floor.

I guess, the point is, I took away his power he had by doing that. Instead of it being a source of whining, trying to get his way, it ended up being funny (albeit by a bit of mockery).
The next time he even attempted to start it again, I interrupted and said "oh, are we doing this again, should I get ready?" and he stopped. Cold.

Reply

I'm probably not the best person to give advice because my own 5 yo some is like this however here's what I've done and it has worked for most kids (Except for my own *sigh*)

"Are we growing up, or are we growing down?" A common phrase I say when any of the kids throw a fit over something. It's just a reminder that tantrums are not acceptable as a way to get what they want.

If that doesn't work then I send them to the "thinking chair" which is just a small chair on a small rug away from the group and off to one side of our main play space. It's close enough that they're in the same room but far enough to be out of reach and not so close within hearing that my ears start to bleed from the whining.
"Hey little Suzie, I can see that you're having a hard time now that it's clean up time. If you're not going to clean up then you can go sit in the Thinking Chair" and you won't be able to play with [name of toy]"

Recently this method backfired and the child was happy to sit on the small rug crying and whining until the end of time so I removed the chair and had the child stand instead and he didn't like that, it was too much work to have to stand and too much of an inconvenience so he stops and just rejoins our group. It's not exactly a time out, it's more like a place that any child can go to if they need some "me" space to think about stuff and to process their emotions. When the child has a hard time to the point that they're bothering the other kids and it's affecting the general mood of the group then I do send them there to give them time to decompress.

Reply

Unfortunately the one I had like this only got worse as she got older and I had to term. I tried being respectful and giving attention, ignoring, sending her to bed, taking away privelages...everything. I wish I had better advice for you.

Reply