So I'm a member of a couple of FCC or education based groups on Facebook and one really bothers me. It seemed ok when I first got the invite and joined (its a private group with over 400 members). I rarely check in on the group and honestly don't know why I'm still on it but when I do check in it seems like there's some Provider posting pictures of DCKs (mainly babies) screaming or acting up. It really bothers me. It is a private group so its not like all their friends see but no one really knows anyone else there and there is 400+ of them! I think its highly inappropriate to be posting photos of DCKs online! Especially when the captions is a rant about the DCK with things like "spoiled brat," "bad baby" or "whiner" (DCK is crying in picture) I posted something about it being inappropriate recently and my post was deleted so obviously the admin disagrees with my opinion. I'm not going to be a member any longer, but it really bothers me!

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Wow. Highly unprofessional. I wonder how the parents of those kids would feel? Yikes.

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Can you report it? I doubt any of the providers in the group have permission to post photos like that of their children especially in a negative light.

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I'd totally do it, I'm just not sure where/how to report on fb. I clicked the report option from the drop down menu but then it wants you to classify it to report it and it only gives nudity, scam, violence type options.

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Some people think that just because they have permission to take pictures and post pictures of people's kids on advertisements that they have permission to post it where every the please. This is very unprofessional! And I am sure that parent's would not give permission if they knew providers where sharing these pictures of their kids at a bad timing and calling them "bad kids", Heck if I was a DCP and I found out about this I would pull my kid out ASAP! You should report it say that they don't have permission to post these pictures on that page (maybe you can pretend to be a DCM) before you leave the group.

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You can report it, report it as violation of copyrighted material and explain in the section it gives you that it isn't the persons child they are posting photos of, and in a very negative way, etc.

I am so saddened by these 'providers' and even more upset with the children in their care, and the parents who have no idea what the provider really thinks.

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Totally goes against state regulations

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If you'd be willing to pm me a link to the group I'll totally join and make your voice a chorus

I'm sure others here would be more than happy to do the same.

As long as we don't identify that we're all coming from here maybe they'll get the message that it's incredibly unethical and lots of providers from all over think it's in incredibly poor taste.

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Count me in if you need voices

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Ha ha, I was thinking the same thing! Count me in I am actually very curious as to what group this is! PM me too!

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I'd like to know too as I'm members of a few groups as well and never seen this sort of thing. Please message me the details.

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I figured out how to report the pictures after my last post.

I saw a comment on the most recent crying baby about how the poster was going to post a video of DCK crying, so I just reported the whole group itself to Facebook for posting photos/videos of other people's children that are not authorized. The poster of photo that had my comment deleted is an admin too so maybe that's why my comment disappeared. I found the provider started it on the list of admins and sent her a message. I didn't get any response so far but the pictures are gone (I left two unreported so I could see if the pictures we're removed, the reported ones are removed from my view after I report them), either she or fb took them down.

It's listed as a "secret group" so you can't search for it, you have to be approved by an admin. I remember seeing daycare provider's group became "secret" on my newsfeed but didn't think anything about it, red flag now! I didn't even know this was possible option for groups. I learned a lot about Facebook today too!

Edit: No response via message but apparently in the time since I've typed this and then logged in to fb I've been booted from the secret club .

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Good riddance eh?!!

Providers like that make the rest of us look just terrible. If parents want to rant about their kids like that it's one thing, but the people who are supposed to be caring professionals certainly have no business spreading that kind of ugliness in regards to someone else's child!!!

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Oh, this is just......ick! I can't even wrap my brain around such behavior!

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I agree! Those parents would be livid! I'll admit I looked through the "likes" and friends of the providers posting those pictures before I reported them so I could see if I could find a parent and try to invite them to the group... that would have created some fireworks! But I wasn't able to find any that I knew for sure were parents, let alone the parents of that specific child.

I think what got me the most was all the comments on the photos, most agreeing with the provider's description of the child and passing along sympathies for the provider I wanted to reach through the screen and take the kids!

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WOw.. those are terrible things to say. I would never (seriously) use the word brat.

I belong to a few on facebook also. One is way over the top sappy and overachieving. They say things like "I used the last few dollars I had to my name to buy the little darlings some new cups for the water table, even though it means I couldn't afford to buy the medicine I needed for myself" Or "He's been so sick...poor muffin...I feel so bad for him, that I held him for the last three hours while he puked down my bra". (I don't post there ever...my dedication is much lower)

The other page is more like "He puked ONCE, and I put him in his carseat and left him on the doorstep" Or "I need new cups for the kid's watertables, but then I saw this bottle of wine, and got that instead".

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Man, that is so sad and unprofessional - I'm glad you reported them.

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For some reason this has really been bugging me. I know they booted you, Lyss, but I assume the group is still there, right?

I am not a huge Facebook user and only have family on my page so I wouldn't do any good for me to do this by myself, but what if everybody here who thinks this should stop put something on their page like this:

Did you know that there are "secret" groups consisting of mostly daycare providers on Facebook? These groups are posting pictures of the children in their care in distress and making all kinds of comments, including calling them "brats" and the like. How would you feel if this was your child, grandchild, niece or nephew? Hit "share" if you think this type of thing should not be allowed.

What do you think? Could it work? Are there any downsides?

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Please don't do this. Parents are already suspicious of child care providers, especially in home providers. This would just make it harder for those of us doing what we are supposed to do find good clients. Don't get me wrong, I think that type of behavior is unprofessional, unethical, etc. But the OP reported the group so hopefully they will shape up. I also think providers who behave that way eventually get what's coming to them - unprofessional behavior is rarely confined to "private" groups - it spills over to public places. Let them hang individually.

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I understand what you're saying, but I can't help but wonder how the families of these kids would feel.

I don't feel like sweeping something like this under the rug or hoping somehow that it will get resolved by someone else is the right thing to do.

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I'm in!

Edit: Just saw they kicked you out. That's just horrible that somebody wold do that and now I bet the pictures are going to go right back up. Sad...

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I agree.

I think planting a seed of suspicion for parents about daycare providers and Facebook will make EVERYONE providing child care with a FB page look bad.

I think PlayCare is right about providers who do this kind of thing, they don't just reserve the bad/unprofessional behavior for secret FB pages.

I believe in Karma and most people get what's coming to them one way or another.


@MyAngels~ I TOTALLY understand where you are coming from but I think that there has to be a more PRO-active way to deal with this sort of thing.

Maybe ALL child care providers should post some sort of open post about how much they respect/appreciate/value/love/care for (whatever word works) about their childcare children/families etc. (??)

I don't know what the right answer is but I do think sometimes fighting fire with fire isn't the best approach IMHO.

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I wonder how many of these "secret" groups there are (not just daycare related - total number)?

I wonder if just contacting Facebook would help at all?

I see what you two are saying about giving the profession a bad name, but I honestly don't think just ignoring something like this and hoping that some day, somehow they get theirs is appropriate, either.

It's hard enough for adults to control their digital footprint in this day and age, but these are children who have no control over the actions of their providers who are supposed to be protecting them and instead are exploiting them for what? I few laughs, a comment from a stranger? And we all know that Facebook owns that content, not the person who posted it, so now it lives on in perpetuity.

I don't know. I can't remember who here said it, but I'm beginning to agree that yes, Facebook is evil .

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Although I agree with your statement, I think it could negatively affect those of us who use Facebook to share sensory activities, field trips, etc. Parents may just choose not to sign the waiver at all and it would limit us. Unfortunately, a poor few can ruin a good thing for everyone else.

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I know, it's hard to not want to do something about it and I do agree that something should be done however, the exploitation of kids by their own parents is a rampant and super sad thing now days with FB, I-phones, web-sites etc etc.

Seems people measure themselves as a parent now days by how many times they post a picture of their own child doing something extremely common or mundane but post a comment like their child is the first and only to ever have done such a thing....

I agree 200% Facebook IS evil when people do that sort of thing.

It seems society no longer cares when anyone, children, pets, family, friends, complete strangers are humiliated, shamed or made fun of as long as it garners a couple 's for the poster.

There are pet-shaming sites, people of Walmart sites, Jacka$$ type sites and the list goes on and on.....Just browse Facebook, Twitter, Instagram or Youtube and you can't help but see these types of things everywhere now.

I don't have the answer as to what should or could be done, I just know that making a statement to parents about "secret pages" about their kids will get everyone all worked up and untrusting of any daycare provider and if a tidal wave of backlash is gonna come down on a few unprofessional jerks who shouldn't be in the business in the first place, I think that it will hurt a lot of good providers who have done nothing wrong but now have a ton of untrusting parents upset with them.

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I imagine they would feel pretty terrible
But I think by posting something like you suggested it would open up a huge can of worms that would have nothing to do with the specific issue. Suddenly everyone and their brother would be posting about how horrible day care/providers are. On some of the parenting forums I frequent many of the parents state empathically that they would NEVER send their kids to in homes because of reasons like this.
I like Black Cat's suggestion about posting positive things about the children/day care. Focus on the good and highlight it.

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Wow! Not much more I can say. I hope they keep the pics down, but I'm sure since they have now booted you, they probably put them back up

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Look, I don't condone the group's behavior. I think the OP made the right call reporting the group and photos.

That said, here are the BIG downsides of doing an action like the one described above. First of all, there are a lot of secret groups on many public forums, INCLUDING this one. We have both an off-topic for members only AND a secret group that you have to have a certain number of posts be a member for six months to join. Both are not accessible to every Jane and Johnny randomly searching through the internet.

Some daycare providers haven't found this place yet and do use facebook to network with their colleagues. I am part of my local areas' secret daycare page. The only photos we share are crafts/activities we are planning and our spaces. However, we do also chat frankly about issues of non-payment, lateness, disrespect, etc, and oftentimes our usernames on Facebook are our REAL NAMES. If those groups were public and current clients could link us by our names while we are asking real questions like we do here behind anonymous usernames, then it is a whole different ballgame and really bad news for a provider who might just need a little support. If you cut off ALL secret groups, many would not have a support system. I am lucky to have a few forums to get ideas from, but not all of the ladies are doing the same, I know that for a fact. Please do not let a few bad apples spoil the bunch.

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Misery loves company, and that secret group sounds like a bunch of rotten apples....its too bad people like that just conglomerate together and feed off of each others negative energy

But just happy we can feed off each others positiveness

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Even though I totally understand where myangels is coming from I agree with this ^ post, could totally see a parent remembering a post like that and refusing to sign a photo waiver. I use my photos for a scrapbook that I let potential DCPs browse through during interviews and its left out for DCPs to view so they can see what we've been up too. I've noticed that they seem to think whatever they see us doing at the end of the day, playing one easy to clean activity waiting by the door , is what we've been doing all day but the photos show what we were actually up to! I hate to have to stop doing that because no one wants to sign a photo waiver.

I did report the group and the pictures but beyond that there is nothing more I can do. I'm sure they are back up and going on their merry way, I wouldn't at all be surprised if there is a post on there right now about how rude I was Oh well, hopefully Karma will get them.

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The secret groups are not all bad. I belong to several, and none of them are like the description in the OP. One is about old nostalgia. But, it happens to be a group of us who met about ten years ago on another board. The old board closed down suddenly, and over the last ten years, some of us have managed to stay in touch through email or Yahoo.. then one member made a facebook page, made it secret, and then started inviting the old members, and having them invite anybody they kept in touch with. It's a secret, because it's really just for the members of this old board. We don't really want just any random person with a photo of their old record collection. We just want to pick up where we left off.

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Okay, okay, you guys have convinced me not to speak openly to my whole (gasp) 20 Facebook peeps about these shady "secret" groups .

I hope you're right and this mystical "karma" that's been spoken of strikes all of these unethical providers, though I guess I'll never know, since they're so "secret."

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Maybe Facebook will get to my report and keep an eye on them I think obviously if they are posting things like the then they can't be providing the best care IMO, maybe the parent's will realize it soon.

I understand the secret group appeal and really don't think its that big of a deal, just being secret doesn't equal bad IMO its how they use it. Heck I try to keep my profile as secret as I can from people I don't know (and some I do ) so I can understand wanting a secret group. I just didn't realizes that was an option. I'm sure there are many people using regular groups and private groups for not so ethical ways.

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I will join too. Maybe we can find out where some of these providers are located and report them to their licencing department...

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