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  #1  
Old 03-15-2021, 12:24 PM
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Default How Does This Sound

I have someone contact me, I told them that I was going to have an opening in June after school gets out and dcm delivers the baby but... (then I found out that the child is a non-napper and I just termed a non-napper) She knows that she would be replacing another family so how does this sound...

Thank you for your patience, I just got word back from my current client. It looks like their last day has been pushed back and it will not be until late August. Sorry about any inconvenience this may have caused you. If something changes, I will be sure to let you know.

Thank you for understanding.
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Old 03-15-2021, 01:40 PM
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I would not say anything about the other family b/c what if this lady responds & says she's willing to wait until late August? I would just say "I've had a change in availability & unfortunately I won't be able to accommodate your family at this time." Keep it short & sweet. No need to give details or a reason. It's really not their business if they're not already enrolled with fees paid.
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Old 03-15-2021, 07:43 PM
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Originally Posted by Joyfulnoise View Post
I would not say anything about the other family b/c what if this lady responds & says she's willing to wait until late August? I would just say "I've had a change in availability & unfortunately I won't be able to accommodate your family at this time." Keep it short & sweet. No need to give details or a reason. It's really not their business if they're not already enrolled with fees paid.
Thank you, I need a ghostwriter sometimes. I should have just cut it off when I found out about the napping issues. But instead, I tried to discourage her by recommending other providers. As you can see that did not work.

So this leads me to wonder if you are having an initial phone call with a parent and you find something out that you do not want to deal with, like non-napper, how do you politely say not going to happen?

Because I always try to change the subject by recommending/referring them to the state list of providers but that, I am finding, does not work. Then I just do not know what to do when they call back.
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Old 03-16-2021, 03:35 AM
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Originally Posted by 284878 View Post
Thank you, I need a ghostwriter sometimes. I should have just cut it off when I found out about the napping issues. But instead, I tried to discourage her by recommending other providers. As you can see that did not work.

So this leads me to wonder if you are having an initial phone call with a parent and you find something out that you do not want to deal with, like non-napper, how do you politely say not going to happen?

Because I always try to change the subject by recommending/referring them to the state list of providers but that, I am finding, does not work. Then I just do not know what to do when they call back.
There's always the straight forward "It was a pleasure talking to you but unfortunately I don't feel my program would be a good fit for your family at this time."
I don't ever commit on a first conversation & I make sure they know that. The truth is you are interviewing them as much as they are interviewing you. Just present it like you are interviewing multiple families for one spot & you will get back with them once you've made a final decision to offer the spot. Then you have a day or two to consider any red flags. If they call back & you don't want to take them, "I'm sorry the spot is no longer available."

Last edited by Blackcat31; 03-16-2021 at 08:03 AM.
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Old 03-16-2021, 04:15 AM
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@OP, I used to have the same problem, until I decided to write a contract stating ALL my expectations, that way I'm covered.
I hand a copy to parents right at interview and as far as nap goes, it says right there "When a child outgrows the need for a nap, he/she has outgrown my program".
I have not have had an issue of say: non nappers, potty training, late pay, late pick ups etc
They break the contract at any point, they get a reminder and then they're out.
... enrollments expire yearly, that way, I'm no longer stuck with a family that refuses to realize that their child should move on to a more suited program
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Old 03-16-2021, 07:52 AM
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[quote=Joyfulnoise;727058]
Quote:
Originally Posted by 284878 View Post
Thank you, I need a ghostwriter sometimes. I should have just cut it off when I found out about the napping issues. But instead, I tried to discourage her by recommending other providers. As you can see that did not work.

So this leads me to wonder if you are having an initial phone call with a parent and you find something out that you do not want to deal with, like non-napper, how do you politely say not going to happen?

Because I always try to change the subject by recommending/referring them to the state list of providers but that, I am finding, does not work. Then I just do not know what to do when they call back.[/QUOTE
There's always the straight forward "It was a pleasure talking to you but unfortunately I don't feel my program would be a good fit for your family at this time."
I don't ever commit on a first conversation & I make sure they know that. The truth is you are interviewing them as much as they are interviewing you. Just present it like you are interviewing multiple families for one spot & you will get back with them once you've made a final decision to offer the spot. Then you have a day or two to consider any red flags. If they call back & you don't want to take them, "I'm sorry the spot is no longer available."
When a family calls me to inquire about childcare, I always ask about how/if their child takes a nap. I let the parnet know over the phone that with the way our play space is set up that we nap in the playroom and that there is not a space for non-nappers to play during nap time.
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  #7  
Old 03-16-2021, 08:15 AM
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A non-napper and a child that resists nap are two different things to me so when a parent says their child is a non-napper, I usually ask what they mean.

If they don't nap at home, I let parents know ALL children in care are required to participate in rest time.

Whether they can/can't do that quietly depends on the child. This is where the trial period comes in to play for me.
I've encountered many children over the years that didn't take a single nap at home but rested here quietly without issue.

Infants are required by licensing rules to have a rest time and I've only had one infant over the years that simply did not sleep all day long.

Now, that's not to say I will ever consider a child that requires certain routines to be performed before they'll sleep as I am group care and am not equipped or able to rock, wear, hold or sing Yankee Doodle just so Jr can nap during the day.

When enrolling infants, I always send parents a letter stating exactly what my expectations are for infant sleep in child care PRIOR to enrolling. I am okay with an infant that needs a bit of adjustment during the trial period but if there is no progress or the whole situation causes issues for everyone else, I let them go. It just is what it is.

Older kids (over 12 months) must lay quietly (sleep not required) for rest period. If not, the same applies...they are termed.

What they do/don't do at home has no bearing on my decision to enroll unless that behavior impacts MY day.

Sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't.

A parent that requests that their child not participate in rest time doesn't make it past the first phone call. ~Bye!
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Old 03-16-2021, 08:30 AM
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Dcm told me this week she was afraid to ask but would I consider not requiring dcb4 to take a nap. I told her nap/rest was non-negotiable but could I ask WHY? She said dcb4 didn't take a nap over the weekends and allowed them (parents) to sleep late each day and now dcb4 would not even sleep in his own bed. She said all this while dcb4 was listening so I replied with "he will have to rest/nap here but it's up to yall to get him back in his bed". Dcb4 is very smart so I knew he needed to understand what I expect here.
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  #9  
Old 03-16-2021, 11:12 AM
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Your home, do what works for you. Short and sweet for explaining that you require naps.

Last edited by coloradoprovider; 03-16-2021 at 11:15 AM. Reason: different post
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Old 03-16-2021, 11:35 AM
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Okay sometimes just make my post short and sweet. I don't put in all of the stories, I just do highlights.

So here are more of the highlights...

DCM said dcg4 did not nap but that she would lay for rest time. Which I was okay with, but then she wanted to pick dcg4 up for preschool and bring her back which I did not want to deal with especially since it was dcm that would be picking up only dcg4 and not dcb1.5. So then I suggested other DC and how to find their contact info.

Then she started texting follow-up questions and I did not know what to do so I just answered them. I considered not being truthful and reply with some outrageous thing that I would never do but I did not and was polite and biz-like.

Then came the request, Dcb1.5 needs to be in a fully dark room with no noise in order for him to sleep. I responded that babies sleep in dd room with the curtains closed. But then I started thinking about this. If I put him in there then I would have to bring the other babies out and what happens when he turns 2, he will have to be in the living room where there are noise and light.

So I decided I did not want to deal with multiple pickups and drop-offs and then a child that was not tired enough to nap or rest after preschool or arrives back here during or after lunch and has to eat alone. Then on top of that keeping my dd and the other SA child completely silent during nap time so dc1.5 could sleep in a dark quiet room.

Then she texted that she wanted to start earlier than I had told her that I would have space, I reminded her of when they could start but that did not deter her. So I needed a way to end it, which is hard for me because I did not want to upset her.

So I took what joyfulnoise said to write and I sent it but worry that she is going to ask how my availability changed. What do I do if that happens?




Telling potential families no to care is hard for me to do.
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Old 03-16-2021, 12:39 PM
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Think of it this way, with all the questions and special requests, they are, in essence, telling you “no” that the service that you offer is not adequate for them so they are putting the burden on you to offer more. It always makes it easier for me to say No, when I think of it that way.

The sleep in the dark request would be a no-go here as rooms have to be will lit enough for me to check on children and/or for them to be able to see to evacuate in case of emergency.

I have a family who needs speech therapy and the therapist comes to daycare once a week. I don’t have to allow the therapist to come to daycare, but I could allow it once a week as it causes minimal inconvenience. The parents started off telling me they couldn’t find anyone and then they asked what times the therapist could be here. I told them the times that would work best. They came back with a therapist that would come between 11:30-12:30. Of course not during the times I said would work for me. Parents told me that was the only person/time available. I simply said “No”. I make/serve lunch during that time and I’m not changing the schedule or delaying naps. I also have to make sure the other kids are occupied while the therapist is here so the therapist can work with the kids they’re here for, not my whole daycare. Since it was something I didn’t have to allow and I was already doing a favor at an inconvenience to myself just so the parents wouldn’t lose time from work, I felt no guilt saying No. Amazingly enough, they were able another therapist to come in right after breakfast.

I’ll bend where I can but when there’s too many demands and too many requests for explanation, a “Sorry, that doesn’t work for me.” is enough.
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Old 03-16-2021, 12:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 284878 View Post
I sent it but worry that she is going to ask how my availability changed. What do I do if that happens?
Telling potential families no to care is hard for me to do.
“My first priority are currently enrolled families so I am not at liberty to discuss what changes have occurred but I will let you know if any availability that meets your needs becomes available in the future. Thank you”

Or go short and sweet and just say “I’m sorry but I can’t discuss it. Thank you again for your interest in my program”
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Old 03-20-2021, 09:28 AM
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Well that back fired. I use dh fb account to respond to another person looking for care for one child a couple days a week on the 9th. Then on the 16th told her my availability had changed. Now on the 20th she found the comment on a post for care for 1 child twice a week and asked my dh if I still had openings.

Huh, it was a week before I told her that I didn't have availability and the post is for one child not two and for twice a week not whole week.

Do I ignore and let it get buried? Delete/alter dh comment (removing my website link) or comment back that I/dh was incorrect and there is no space or say that things changed after I posted a comment?

Or should I respond via email as me...

Sorry for the confusion on fb, at the time that dh posted I still had availability. A few days later things changed and I let you know right away.

Or...

Sorry for the confusion, availability changed after dh posted that and I let you know right away. Please note, if you find any other post by DH that the may be old post and do not always reflect my current availability.





(I currently am looking to fill one spot but she needs two)

Thoughts? Also should I have DH block her?
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Old 03-21-2021, 08:09 AM
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I don't communicate with potential childcare families via a public forum like Facebook. Keep it personal to the intended family only. When interviewing potential clients, have a list of questions by your phone that you ask BEFORE an in-person interview. How old is your child? if child isn't an infant, I ask about the current childcare situation. If child is currently in childcare, I ask why they want a change. I ask what hours would your child be here? Does your child take a nap? Is your child comfortable around a dog? I ask as many questions as necessary to weed out families that wouldn't be a good fit. I don't want to waste my after hours time on an interview unless I feel it might be a potential good fit. I don't know how long you've been doing childcare, but if you haven't been a provider very long, it'll get easier to say no. Good luck, you don't have to justify your business decisions to a stranger. Do what works for you and your family.
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Old 03-21-2021, 08:16 AM
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Originally Posted by 284878 View Post
Okay sometimes just make my post short and sweet. I don't put in all of the stories, I just do highlights.

So here are more of the highlights...

DCM said dcg4 did not nap but that she would lay for rest time. Which I was okay with, but then she wanted to pick dcg4 up for preschool and bring her back which I did not want to deal with especially since it was dcm that would be picking up only dcg4 and not dcb1.5. So then I suggested other DC and how to find their contact info.

Then she started texting follow-up questions and I did not know what to do so I just answered them. I considered not being truthful and reply with some outrageous thing that I would never do but I did not and was polite and biz-like.

Then came the request, Dcb1.5 needs to be in a fully dark room with no noise in order for him to sleep. I responded that babies sleep in dd room with the curtains closed. But then I started thinking about this. If I put him in there then I would have to bring the other babies out and what happens when he turns 2, he will have to be in the living room where there are noise and light.

So I decided I did not want to deal with multiple pickups and drop-offs and then a child that was not tired enough to nap or rest after preschool or arrives back here during or after lunch and has to eat alone. Then on top of that keeping my dd and the other SA child completely silent during nap time so dc1.5 could sleep in a dark quiet room.

Then she texted that she wanted to start earlier than I had told her that I would have space, I reminded her of when they could start but that did not deter her. So I needed a way to end it, which is hard for me because I did not want to upset her.

So I took what joyfulnoise said to write and I sent it but worry that she is going to ask how my availability changed. What do I do if that happens?




Telling potential families no to care is hard for me to do.
I didn't mean for you to post something short and sweet, we providers love some background information. I meant the communication with parents re: naps could be short and sweet. When we over explain ourselves to parents, some parents will argue each point. A stock answer re: naps: the state requires a daily rest period for children who are here more than 4 hours (my state does), I require a daily quiet time to recharge.
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