Logged out for privacy. I am a regular here but want to keep my privacy with this matter. I have been feeling depressed for some time now. Lately over the past couple months things have only gotten worse. I have tried small life changes to help improve but I just can't pull out of it. I pretend I am ok for the daycare kids and parents but it's getting harder to hide my misery. It's not my job really, I love what I do I love teaching kids the basics and watching them grow here. It's just everything rolled into one I guess. I also have a difficult child at times (ADHD among other disorders) Maybe I even a chemical imbalance who knows. I just have a full plate with the daycare kids, my own child, pets, family, money, and certain clients that just thrive in chaos and drama bring it in to my daycare. I battle it well, blowing off and just enforcing policies with a smile and a kind word. I just am at the end of my rope today. I was already feeling very down almost lethargic forcing myself about today on the verge of tears. I pushed through to get my last out the door. Come to find out the client did not even work today! She is not permitted child care unless working so she lied obviously. She wouldnt look me in the eye or give a straight answer to anything I asked. (wasnt dressed for work) To top it off she had friends with her also no answer for that. I just stood there getting more depressed because I could have been resting instead of tending to someone elses kids. I don't mean to turn this to a vent I'm sorry I just need some help. I picked up the phone to call for support but I worry they will take my license and job away. I am not a danger to anyone or myself. I just have a lot on my plate right now and can't seem to keep my head above water. I cry easily and am just so tired and even sore lately. I don't have many clients so money is another issue I battle. I just need someone to show me how to cope and manage things better. I guess if I have to go to a therapist I will but I just dont want to risk my daycare. Is there some place on line that can help me? Any advise, links, info, etc is greatly appreciated! Thank you so much!

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Have you spoken to a Doctor about this? Are you on any supplements or medications?

My general Doctor prescribed me Prozac before I was pregnant. I stopped taking it during my pregnancy. My baby died, and after I delivered her I started taking it again. It has helped tremendously. We live in a society that tells us to pull ourselves up by our bootstraps, but sometimes that just isn't possible. Some people's depression is not situational. Some people's depression is chemical.

You might give Positive Thoughts a try. It's a supplement. http://www.amazon.com/Source-Natural...4702592&sr=8-1

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Have you spoken to your doctor? Are you on medication? There is something called situational depression. There must be an anonymous support number you can call to talk with some one. When you are feeling depressed, sometimes just speaking with someone does a world of wonders. During winter months SAD is common (Seasonal affective disorder)Symptoms usually build up slowly in the late autumn and winter months.
http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmedhealth/PMH0002499/

There are herbal remedies like St Johns wort or ginseng, but you shouldn't take anything without consulting your doctor first.

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Sorry to hear this. My wife had a bad bout with postpartum depression after our daughter's birth. She did not want to take medication and her acupuncturist recommended St John Wort and Kava Kava. http://www.viable-herbal.com/combos/herbs/c640.htm

After initially watching her get worse everyday, she started taking the St John Wort and Kava Kava and I could see her regaining herself a little each day. After a couple weeks she was much better. Always consult your doctor first.

I think you need to treat your mind, body and spirit as a whole. I once was diagnosed with a life threatening ailment (it was an incorrect diagnosis) but for 2 years I thought I was dying. I found that my mind would dwell on negatives and I had to make an effort to think of the positive things that I had taken for granted. It can be a downward spiral unless you manage your thoughts first. Even the littlest negative thing can warp into larger thinking problems. Catch yourself when this happens and focus on anything/event/person/smell that makes you feel good. And keep at it.

I had a grandmother that would always laugh and whenever I thought I had a problem she would say "don't worry about it". Everything always turns out ok. She lived to be 100 years old.

Its a process but like anything you can start right now this minute. Good luck.

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I think we have all been there at one time or another! I so know where you are coming from and there are several avenues you can take.

Start with your doctor and see what they say. Do you have clergy or someone at your church you could talk to or a close, close friend?

Daycare is very wearing, isolated, and really can take a toll on you mentally and physicall. Your not the first nor the last to feel this way but it is very, very hard. I know, believe me.

If you would like to pm me, I am willing to talk to you more in depth if you would like. Your forum name will remain completely annomous so don't worry there.

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Talk to you doctor about this, it's important. Many medications are out there and do work for people who experience the emotions you are feeling and many also seek someone to talk to, which can help also.

We always seem to over look ourselves, never giving how WE feel a 2nd thought since so many women/mothers/caregivers have so many other things on our plates (as you said), BUT we can't over look everything forever, you need to start feeling better emotionally, go and talk to someone or give medication a try...it can help and you'll be thankful you did it for YOU!

Don't ever assume it will go away or that it can be covered up, many many MANY people suffer from different emotional issues at some point in their lives and it's nothing to be embarrassed about either. No one even needs to know you are seeking help!

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I would even suggest you use the CHAT room which allows for PRIVATE CHAT between two members.

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Please talk to a doctor. Mental health is as important as physical health, please don't be afraid to get the help you need and deserve.

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Thank you Michael! Yes, if you would like to chat pm me and I can meet you in the chat room.

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I've worked in a pharmacy the last nine years that's inside a family practice clinic. I promise you, there are many people seeking help for feelings like yours. And there is no reason you should even worry about your daycare. I can't speak for your particular area, but in my town I think at least 90% home daycare providers I filled prescriptions for take anti-depressant/anti-anxiety meds. We have 1 daycare center in town...every worker there that I knew of takes medication for depression. Doctors, nurses, pharmacist, professors, police officers, lawyers, ect...there is no profession where you can't find people who have needed help for depression of some sort. Your primary doctor is the best place to start. If medication is something something you're comfortable with and your doctor thinks it would help, don't think twice about what others may think. Your records are confidential, no one can release information on you about the kind of care you have or the kind of medication you are prescribed without your written consent. The same goes for seeing a counselor or psychologist. It's incredibly common, and against the law to give out any identifying details. Seeking help will make you a better caregiver and make you feel better physically as well.

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So many things are tied to our mental health. You should go to the doctors and get a full work up. Low thyroid and iron can make you depressed. I know I have both and I battle depression eveyday. I would see a doctor before you start any over the counter meds. St. jonhs wort is one you should not take if you have low thyroid. If you have questions please PM me and I will do my best to answer them.

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This is so true! I was involved with a homeschool group and one of the moms one time said she was amazed at the number of ladies in the group who was on some sort of medication for depression/anxiety. I do know alot of people in our area are on something to because of the winters, rainy grey and cold. Alot of people here also suffer from SAD.

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If the member is logged out she can not PM. I think a private chat would be the best bet if she can post it here first that she will be available in the chat area. Actually, she can email me and I will PM you if need be. director@daycare.com

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Please do not feel ashamed or embarassed, like others have said there are so many people battling depression and anxiety. I would strongly urge you to talk to your DR and see what they suggest. Maybe even getting it off your chest and opening up to someone outside your circle will help you tremendously. Sometimes we bottle things up for so long that we end up in crisis. If talking doesn't help then there are many medication options.

As someone who suffers from Seasonal Affective Disorder I can attest to the positive effects of St.John's Wort as Michael has suggested. It does take quite a while to work though so you might need professional help in the meantime.

Sending you virtual hugs

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Please get help. I dealt with clinical depression with suicidal ideations for years before breaking down and seeking help. It was the best thing I ever did for myself and my family. I was on meds and in cognitive therapy (individual and group) for the greater part of a year. My doctor told me that meds work, therapy works, but they work more than twice as well when used together.
I still have periods of 'down' feelings, but not nearly as bad as it was. I can go back to the tools I learned from my therapist to prevent the moods from getting darker, so to speak. I am a much better person, wife, mother, friend, etc, because of it.

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There is absolutely nothing wrong with seeking a Dr.'s advice or with taking medication to help cope with depression - I have taken them at several points in my life, and they really do help. I can remember a time of feeling like I'd never feel myself again, but the medication made all the difference.

I do have one word of caution if you decide to take St. John's Wort - if you are female and on birth control, then the herb can interfere with the effectiveness of the BC. Just something to keep in mind.

Hugs to you.

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I've been on some sort of anti depressant / anxiety meds for 16+ years. Its very hard to admit it and go to your DR but well worth it, you can do it! I see my regular physician. You will feel so much better.

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I am the OP and just want to say thank you all for the help and support. I have not spoken to my doctor but I do intend to now. I was hoping there was a miracle link to help me but I know that's impossible. I hate taking drugs of any kind. I am very worried about meds like prozac etc because I heard before they could cause a person to have suicidal thoughts. I already feel worthless at times so I am very concerned about taking meds while caring for children. I will call my doctor ASAP and see what he suggests. I just worried if the doctor would find me an unfit care giver. I guess I am just being silly. I think talking may help too. I just feel overwhelmed. I can take family probs, or my health probs, or money, or ignorant clients etc etc but I just can't manage them all together right now. I'm sorry to hear that some of you have encountered the same emotional stress but happy that you shared with me and gave the advise. Thank you all again!

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Thanks for keeping us involved.

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All medications sound scary when you look at the possible side effects. Honestly, even with all my years in the pharmacy, I'm still not a big believer in drugs to solve every problem. About 8 years ago,I finally talked to my doctor about how I was feeling angry all the time, and he prescribed Prozac. I truly didn't think it would do anything, but I took it. Apparently, the improvement was gradual, because it wasn't until I kept forgetting to take it for over a week that I noticed how moody and angry I was, like before. So, yes, it did work!

Different medications have more side effects that are more common (keep in mind drug companies HAVE to list anything that anyone has reported while taking the medication as a possible side effect, whether it's been proven to be linked to the med or not) but I've never had a patient report a medication made them feel suicidal. Typically patients need some time to adjust to starting a medication and will usually start at a small dose and gradually increase. Your doctor should want to see you again in about 2 weeks, and talk to your pharmacist about anything that might concern you. They are easier to get through to than a doctor and can help answer all your questions.

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Aw honey, I would love to see you get out and do something for YOU. What do you like to do? Take an Art class, Dance Class, something for you because you deserve it! Fatigue is also a problem with many of us. If you possibly can, try going to bed an hour earlier each night. Chances are, you are fighting to stay awake to read that last article on the computer or watch that TV show when you really need more rest.

Working with Children can be a very demeaning job. Staying at home working with children can be even more so. People don't understand how very hard it is to manage everything you do. They think we plop the kids in front of the TV and eat bonbons every day. As if!

I'm not a fan of mood enhancing drugs but you have taken the first step in realizing you have a problem. Like the others have said, talk to a Dr. first and foremost and have them do a blood draw to see if there is anything else going on healthwise. Depression isn't always just in your head - there may be something physical bringing you down as well.

Please keep us updated. ~hugs~

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I have seasonal depression. I hate winter, being cooped up in the house, not seeing much sun in the winter, etc.

I've had it since I was 17!! And since Ive had it for so long, I can tell when it's time make changes. Changes in diet,sleeping habits and I start using a tanning bed!! The tanning was suggested by both my family doctor and my dermotologist and it honestly helps with my energy level too.

Just because we do childcare doesn't mean we are exempt from the twists and turns life throws our way. If you are able to identify it, that is the first step. Consult your doctor to see if he/she feels an antidepressant is right for you or what regimen of treatment they would like to take.

From one fellow provider that has struggled with depression to another, good luck to you.

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I think most people at one time or another have felt how you're feeling. Know that it WILL get better.

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First, I applaud you for recognizing that you are in need of some help! Life is hard- super hard on daycare providers who are over worked, under paid, and under appreciated. Difficult kids can add to the problems as well. You are under stress, and you are not alone!

Start by making little changes. Eat lots of fresh, raw, fruits and veggies, and cut out all processed foods. I also recommend taking a double dosage of Niacin (a B Vitamin). Niacin has been proven in scientific studies to help alleviate depression. I recommend watching 'Food Matters,' which highlights how food can hurt or heal you. There is a good bit on Niacin for depression as well. Many conventional doctors don't even address food and nutrition as a cause or cure for medical issues, even though we eat all day! Many of the chemicals and pesticides that we injest, combined with nutrient deficient food, causes our body to respond in strange ways (depression, obesity, cancer, etc). You will find that your body will balance out if you eat fresh, raw, and local as much as possible. I also take Vitex, and herb, to help balance my hormones. (You can take it daily for 8 months at a time- then give your body a rest). I noticed a huge improvement in my mood, and it regulated my cycle as well.

I am not a doctor by any means, but I have been researching for years about the benefits of nutrition. I studied Psychology as well for my undergraduate degree, and am familiar with lots of medical issues. Depression is real, and most often is it caused by chemical imbalances in the body. Modern medicine puts a bandaid on the symptoms, but it does not cure the cause of the imbalance. (It also adds additional problems-which then, cause you to need more meds. It is a vicious cycle.) Of course, there are amazing medicine wonders that save lives, but I think that too often the root cause of the issues are not resolved.

Seek out a homeopathic doctor and try a natural cure first. Try a niacin supplement. Change your diet. Get fresh air and exercise. I urge you to try this for a few weeks, and do some research on your own. Remember that you are in control of your life, and that you always have choices.

Another thing I read to help you feel happy is to look upwards and smile for a minute. The smile (genuine or not) and looking up can trigger "happy" chemicals to release into your brain. (The book: "I can Make You Happy" has a ton of great exercises to help retrain your brain into choosing to be happy).

Of course, if you are feeling any suicidal thoughts, etc, seek help right away! Those chemical imbalances can cause us to think things are hopeless and out of our control, but there is always a solution.

Sorry so long! Feel free to PM me if you have any questions. I have been in your shoes and have been severely depressed to the point of just wanting to give up on everything in life, but I have come out of it and learned a lot. You can do it! Start small and make tiny changes

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I was diagnosed with depression at 16 yrs old. My doctor put me on zoloft after trying many different kinds.

It worked like a charm. I havent had to take zoloft since I was 28 yrs old now.

I find that I know how to read my body and when I am starting to feel low, I try to get as much daylight as I can.

I also suffer fron SAD. Especially in the winter months.

I have taken ST. Johns Wort and Valarian to help. But not both together!

I have to take 2 Vit b12 and 10,000 IUD's of Vit D a day.

Hope it helps with all this info, but I would still go talk to your doctor about it.

It has taken me years to finally realize that sometimes I do need "help" to feel happy, and if it's from a little pill, ok then.

If there is one thing I hope you do, it would be to go get help.

My hubby and I found my mother in law On April 16th, 2000, passed away on her floor. The cause of death was suicide. She took sleeping pills, to end her life because she was sooo depressed but refused to get proper help.

We were both 22 yrs old and It is the worst thing that we have gone through.

It is not worth putting your family through that much pain, because you feel hopeless. The pain that people feel when their loved one does this, never fades.

Sorry didnt mean to spill the beans on my life, but I hope it helps.
So please, please get help soon.

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Many people suggested St Johns Wort and I agree .... you should not take St John if you are on certian types of birth control...talk to your Dr.

I hope you feel better soon.

Cont to post here!!

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There is absolutely no shame in having depression and seeking help for it, OP. I'm glad that you posted here because it brought up a subject that a lot of people feel uncomfortable talking about.

As far as medications are concerned, there are side effects with all medications. If you take the medication route, just make sure to educate yourself on it and ask your doctor questions if you have any concerns about treatment. Again, I just want you to know that suffering from depression is nothing that you should ever feel ashamed about.

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