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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Not Eating
Unregistered 04:37 AM 07-01-2014
DGG is almost 5 and will come at 7:30 am and stay till 5:30 some days but usually leaves around 4.She would drink a gallon of milk...(she gets one cup in the am here and then after she's eaten her lunch food ).She eats absolutely nothing here if it is not a snack food or one of the few items on her short menu.I serve all the same and if you don't eat it then I will save it for your next food(snack). She will see the others with 'snack' and beg for that over and over I say after you eat lunch.'...............usually she will say before I've even set the lunch on the table she is not going to eat. I say you need to at least sit with your friends.If more pouting and verbal refusals her option is then to go pick up any toys and then go potty and nap right away.She will pick up some, then realize sitting at the table is better than doing all the work herself.I don't even give her full serving because when she does it it is bird bites.Obviously her dietary cravings are being catered too elsewhere.............is there a way I can help her...........I like the no thanks you bites idea and 1-2 eataroo.........do I just keep on? She's a bright very little thing. An only. Yesterday by the end of her day she was so hungry she was getting weepy and more than usual pouty but had refused lunch.
midaycare 04:58 AM 07-01-2014
I had two like this. Both were fed a lot of fast food and yucky stuff outside of dc. I offered sweeter fruits, which seemed to help. I never saved their meal, though. I don't think I can, being on the food plan, but even so, I don't think I would. Each meal and snack is a new opportunity for them to try new things and behave like a big kid, instead of getting stuck on the stuff from the last meal - both the food and behavior.
Angelsj 05:39 AM 07-01-2014
I would not 'save' food. You are setting up what could be a lifelong issue with food by creating that battle. Just change your snacks to include only fruits and or veggies with a protein source like yogurt or cheese.
If your snack is apple and cheese, it doesn't matter if she didn't eat lunch, and there are no tears. You can't force her to eat, but you can ONLY offer good choices so if she does eat, it is healthy.
You can try to talk to the "elsewhere" but you will likely be met with denial, or even hostility.
If your snack is apple and cheese, it doesn't matter if she didn't eat lunch, and there are no tears. You can't force her to eat, but you can ONLY offer good choices so if she does eat, it is healthy.
You can try to talk to the "elsewhere" but you will likely be met with denial, or even hostility.
Unregistered 05:50 AM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by Angelsj:
I would not 'save' food. You are setting up what could be a lifelong issue with food by creating that battle. .
I agree and as a parent I would be ticked off. I would prefer my child have something even snack foods than nothing. I know most of you won't agree but we don't make food an issue. If you want to eat a pop tart all week that is fine. I personally don't believe in making a child eat a bite or two of something. Just because you serve it doesn't mean the child wants to eat it. As an adult if you put certain foods in front of me I would not eat them either...even if I had never had them before. Some foods just look or smell gross let alone having to eat them. You are not going to change her.I would not 'save' food. You are setting up what could be a lifelong issue with food by creating that battle. .
EntropyControlSpecialist 05:55 AM 07-01-2014
I was met with extreme hostility over asking that a parent encourage their child to eat better (as she wasn't eating anything here). This was over 18 months ago. Still, to this day, this parent is irritated at me and will sit next to me at community events/Church events and pretend I don't exist. 
I would just feed her small servings and if she shows an interest in something then serve her more, within reason.
I would just feed her small servings and if she shows an interest in something then serve her more, within reason.
Meeko 05:57 AM 07-01-2014
I would not save food. Infact we are not allowed to on the food program. Children must all be offered the same food at the same time.
Look at each meal/snack as a new opportunity for her. If she refuses....take her plate without a comment. You have done your part.
I get the feeling she probably loves the drama at meal times. She's getting special attention when you give her lunch instead of snack like all the other kids. The drama gets extended from lunch into snack time. She wants be begged and coerced into eating.
Offer food. Once. Don't blink if she refuses. Then talk to the other kids. Praise them for their healthy choices and talk about how yummy it is. Ignore her whining.
If she whines before meals, ignore it. Don't get caught up in her drama. A dramafest is boring if she's the only one attending.
I have kids who will say "I don't want to eat" when I tell them it's time for lunch. I say "Are you sure?" When they say yes, I say OK. According to the food program, I have offered food. I still get paid. I don't worry about it any further.
Look at each meal/snack as a new opportunity for her. If she refuses....take her plate without a comment. You have done your part.
I get the feeling she probably loves the drama at meal times. She's getting special attention when you give her lunch instead of snack like all the other kids. The drama gets extended from lunch into snack time. She wants be begged and coerced into eating.
Offer food. Once. Don't blink if she refuses. Then talk to the other kids. Praise them for their healthy choices and talk about how yummy it is. Ignore her whining.
If she whines before meals, ignore it. Don't get caught up in her drama. A dramafest is boring if she's the only one attending.
I have kids who will say "I don't want to eat" when I tell them it's time for lunch. I say "Are you sure?" When they say yes, I say OK. According to the food program, I have offered food. I still get paid. I don't worry about it any further.
Blackcat31 06:02 AM 07-01-2014
I don't ask kids to do thank you bites or anything similar.
I serve, they eat or don't.
I don't save lunch and re-serve it but I do try to avoid serving crackers and breads during snacks as a lot of kids can and will just hold out for those snacks and never eat anything else all day.
Instead I offer proteins and/or fresh veggies for snacks.
I also try an offer dips made from yogurt or peanut butter to make the fresh veggies more appealing and fun to eat.
Boiled eggs, cottage cheese, cheese and fruit kabobs, sliced salami or turkey are also healthy options for snacks.
I offer milk and water at meals and snacks too.
ALL meals and snacks are relaxed and laid back. No pressure.
I serve, they eat or don't.
I don't save lunch and re-serve it but I do try to avoid serving crackers and breads during snacks as a lot of kids can and will just hold out for those snacks and never eat anything else all day.
Instead I offer proteins and/or fresh veggies for snacks.
I also try an offer dips made from yogurt or peanut butter to make the fresh veggies more appealing and fun to eat.
Boiled eggs, cottage cheese, cheese and fruit kabobs, sliced salami or turkey are also healthy options for snacks.
I offer milk and water at meals and snacks too.
ALL meals and snacks are relaxed and laid back. No pressure.
Kimskiddos 06:27 AM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I don't ask kids to do thank you bites or anything similar.
I serve, they eat or don't.
I don't save lunch and re-serve it but I do try to avoid serving crackers and breads during snacks as a lot of kids can and will just hold out for those snacks and never eat anything else all day.
Instead I offer proteins and/or fresh veggies for snacks.
I also try an offer dips made from yogurt or peanut butter to make the fresh veggies more appealing and fun to eat.
Boiled eggs, cottage cheese, cheese and fruit kabobs, sliced salami or turkey are also healthy options for snacks.
I offer milk and water at meals and snacks too.
ALL meals and snacks are relaxed and laid back. No pressure.
I don't ask kids to do thank you bites or anything similar.
I serve, they eat or don't.
I don't save lunch and re-serve it but I do try to avoid serving crackers and breads during snacks as a lot of kids can and will just hold out for those snacks and never eat anything else all day.
Instead I offer proteins and/or fresh veggies for snacks.
I also try an offer dips made from yogurt or peanut butter to make the fresh veggies more appealing and fun to eat.
Boiled eggs, cottage cheese, cheese and fruit kabobs, sliced salami or turkey are also healthy options for snacks.
I offer milk and water at meals and snacks too.
ALL meals and snacks are relaxed and laid back. No pressure.
I also have a very picky eater and after getting over the initial frustration of her not eating, I just let it go. She either eats or not I don't stress it. It's much better for everyone. With the added bonus that in the last couple of years she has gone from eating NO fruits or veggies to eating a select few.
Heidi 07:35 AM 07-01-2014
Ditto all the pp's
My oldest was a very picky eater, and we did not do tons of fast-food.
I'd make some headway by making it a non-issue ("you want ketchup on your brocoli? Sure, why not?"), then someone else; grandma, an aunt, a visiting adult of some sort, would be compelled to say something. and we'd loose ground yet again.
He's 24 now, and still has quirks with food, but he's tried all sorts of "weird" things in the last few years. He knows what he likes and doesn't like, just like the rest of us.
I would continue to ask her to sit at the table with you all, though. "We like your company, whether you eat or not. It's time for us all to sit together and visit".
My oldest was a very picky eater, and we did not do tons of fast-food.
I'd make some headway by making it a non-issue ("you want ketchup on your brocoli? Sure, why not?"), then someone else; grandma, an aunt, a visiting adult of some sort, would be compelled to say something.
and we'd loose ground yet again. He's 24 now, and still has quirks with food, but he's tried all sorts of "weird" things in the last few years. He knows what he likes and doesn't like, just like the rest of us.
I would continue to ask her to sit at the table with you all, though. "We like your company, whether you eat or not. It's time for us all to sit together and visit".
Leigh 08:53 AM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
I don't ask kids to do thank you bites or anything similar.
I serve, they eat or don't.
I don't save lunch and re-serve it but I do try to avoid serving crackers and breads during snacks as a lot of kids can and will just hold out for those snacks and never eat anything else all day.
Instead I offer proteins and/or fresh veggies for snacks.
I also try an offer dips made from yogurt or peanut butter to make the fresh veggies more appealing and fun to eat.
Boiled eggs, cottage cheese, cheese and fruit kabobs, sliced salami or turkey are also healthy options for snacks.
I offer milk and water at meals and snacks too.
ALL meals and snacks are relaxed and laid back. No pressure.
I don't ask kids to do thank you bites or anything similar.
I serve, they eat or don't.
I don't save lunch and re-serve it but I do try to avoid serving crackers and breads during snacks as a lot of kids can and will just hold out for those snacks and never eat anything else all day.
Instead I offer proteins and/or fresh veggies for snacks.
I also try an offer dips made from yogurt or peanut butter to make the fresh veggies more appealing and fun to eat.
Boiled eggs, cottage cheese, cheese and fruit kabobs, sliced salami or turkey are also healthy options for snacks.
I offer milk and water at meals and snacks too.
ALL meals and snacks are relaxed and laid back. No pressure.
Exactly this. A child will eat when they are hungry. I don't pressure them, and I don't make individual meals. They eat it or they don't.
Leigh 08:59 AM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I agree and as a parent I would be ticked off. I would prefer my child have something even snack foods than nothing. I know most of you won't agree but we don't make food an issue. If you want to eat a pop tart all week that is fine. I personally don't believe in making a child eat a bite or two of something. Just because you serve it doesn't mean the child wants to eat it. As an adult if you put certain foods in front of me I would not eat them either...even if I had never had them before. Some foods just look or smell gross let alone having to eat them. You are not going to change her.
Letting a child eat pop tarts all week DOES make food an issue, IMO. The child knows that by refusing healthy foods, they can get junk food. A child who is offered only healthy options WILL eat those healthy options. This is coming from an adult whose parents let me eat whatever I wanted growing up. As an adult, I wish that they would have only offered me healthy foods. I won't eat chicken, fish, or pork. I eat almost no fruits. I pretty much live on beans and vegetables and occasionally beef. I envy people who snack on fruits, can go to a dinner party and eat anything there. I just never learned to like the stuff because my parents gave in to me every time. I have actually tried hypnosis to try to force myself to like those foods, but I am too resistant. I agree and as a parent I would be ticked off. I would prefer my child have something even snack foods than nothing. I know most of you won't agree but we don't make food an issue. If you want to eat a pop tart all week that is fine. I personally don't believe in making a child eat a bite or two of something. Just because you serve it doesn't mean the child wants to eat it. As an adult if you put certain foods in front of me I would not eat them either...even if I had never had them before. Some foods just look or smell gross let alone having to eat them. You are not going to change her.
My parents were GOOD parents, I'm not angry with them, but I do wish they had not catered to me my whole life, because it wasn't fun to have to face reality as an adult.
MissAnn 09:30 AM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by Leigh:
Letting a child eat pop tarts all week DOES make food an issue, IMO. The child knows that by refusing healthy foods, they can get junk food. A child who is offered only healthy options WILL eat those healthy options. This is coming from an adult whose parents let me eat whatever I wanted growing up. As an adult, I wish that they would have only offered me healthy foods. I won't eat chicken, fish, or pork. I eat almost no fruits. I pretty much live on beans and vegetables and occasionally beef. I envy people who snack on fruits, can go to a dinner party and eat anything there. I just never learned to like the stuff because my parents gave in to me every time. I have actually tried hypnosis to try to force myself to like those foods, but I am too resistant.
My parents were GOOD parents, I'm not angry with them, but I do wish they had not catered to me my whole life, because it wasn't fun to have to face reality as an adult.
Exactly! As providers we are in a sticky situation. We want to serve healthy meals and to get kids on board with eating them. We can't control what parents allow their children to eat at home. We can't compete with a chicken nugget if we choose not to serve them in our programs. I am torn myself. I've posted about eating issues over and over. We can't "fix" a kid who is picky unless parents are on board. Most of my parents are happy that they "at least" have healthy food here. It makes them feel like they are "off the hook" to serve and encourage healthy food at home. It doesn't work that way.....the kids who turn their eating habits around are the ones whose parents ask (or look at my posted menu) and serve those foods at home.....or the parents who at least start serving healthier meals. The parents who continue to cater to what the kid wants to eat.....or make separate meals for each kid......are the ones who I never can change. The ones I end up posting about here!Letting a child eat pop tarts all week DOES make food an issue, IMO. The child knows that by refusing healthy foods, they can get junk food. A child who is offered only healthy options WILL eat those healthy options. This is coming from an adult whose parents let me eat whatever I wanted growing up. As an adult, I wish that they would have only offered me healthy foods. I won't eat chicken, fish, or pork. I eat almost no fruits. I pretty much live on beans and vegetables and occasionally beef. I envy people who snack on fruits, can go to a dinner party and eat anything there. I just never learned to like the stuff because my parents gave in to me every time. I have actually tried hypnosis to try to force myself to like those foods, but I am too resistant.
My parents were GOOD parents, I'm not angry with them, but I do wish they had not catered to me my whole life, because it wasn't fun to have to face reality as an adult.
mamamanda 09:39 AM 07-01-2014
I had one that just wanted to drink & not eat all day too. I just give milk at meals & snacks now & water in between. If a kiddo doesn't eat that's ok. No pressure, but neither will you get something else. Hunger is a natural consequence. If she realizes she won't get any milk to tide her over & no special snack she "should" eat better eventually. I agree with others about offering everyone the same healthy snack.
Leigh 09:43 AM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by MissAnn:
Exactly! As providers we are in a sticky situation. We want to serve healthy meals and to get kids on board with eating them. We can't control what parents allow their children to eat at home. We can't compete with a chicken nugget if we choose not to serve them in our programs. I am torn myself. I've posted about eating issues over and over. We can't "fix" a kid who is picky unless parents are on board. Most of my parents are happy that they "at least" have healthy food here. It makes them feel like they are "off the hook" to serve and encourage healthy food at home. It doesn't work that way.....the kids who turn their eating habits around are the ones whose parents ask (or look at my posted menu) and serve those foods at home.....or the parents who at least start serving healthier meals. The parents who continue to cater to what the kid wants to eat.....or make separate meals for each kid......are the ones who I never can change. The ones I end up posting about here!
I have started trying to educate parents on nutrition by sending home occasional hand outs and even recipes for kid-friendly, healthy meals. The parents get excited about them (most of them), but only one has told me that they actually have implemented changes at home (I don't ask whether they do).Exactly! As providers we are in a sticky situation. We want to serve healthy meals and to get kids on board with eating them. We can't control what parents allow their children to eat at home. We can't compete with a chicken nugget if we choose not to serve them in our programs. I am torn myself. I've posted about eating issues over and over. We can't "fix" a kid who is picky unless parents are on board. Most of my parents are happy that they "at least" have healthy food here. It makes them feel like they are "off the hook" to serve and encourage healthy food at home. It doesn't work that way.....the kids who turn their eating habits around are the ones whose parents ask (or look at my posted menu) and serve those foods at home.....or the parents who at least start serving healthier meals. The parents who continue to cater to what the kid wants to eat.....or make separate meals for each kid......are the ones who I never can change. The ones I end up posting about here!
MarinaVanessa 10:06 AM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
I agree and as a parent I would be ticked off. I would prefer my child have something even snack foods than nothing. I know most of you won't agree but we don't make food an issue. If you want to eat a pop tart all week that is fine. I personally don't believe in making a child eat a bite or two of something. Just because you serve it doesn't mean the child wants to eat it. As an adult if you put certain foods in front of me I would not eat them either...even if I had never had them before. Some foods just look or smell gross let alone having to eat them. You are not going to change her.
Although I agree with not making food an issue I lean towards more the idea of not saving uneaten meals to be served later. If I serve breakfast and a child does not eat I don't save the food and serve it at snack, the child eats whatever snack I serve the other DCK's at snack time and so forth. I provide the food, the kids decide if they want to eat it or not. I don't force the child to eat it and (IMPO) I would consider serving the food that was refused before instead of what was being served to the rest of the group a lot like trying to force. There's no choice there, it's "eat this or don't eat but I'm not giving you what I'm serving the other kids because you didn't eat this earlier".I agree and as a parent I would be ticked off. I would prefer my child have something even snack foods than nothing. I know most of you won't agree but we don't make food an issue. If you want to eat a pop tart all week that is fine. I personally don't believe in making a child eat a bite or two of something. Just because you serve it doesn't mean the child wants to eat it. As an adult if you put certain foods in front of me I would not eat them either...even if I had never had them before. Some foods just look or smell gross let alone having to eat them. You are not going to change her.
What I don't agree with is serving the child whatever he/she wants (referring specifically to the quote above). Allowing a child to eat Pop Tarts all week is like not serving anything at all. There is no nutritional value there whatsoever and in fact you could be creating eating issues thi way as well. "Hmm let's see. Mom wants me to eat chicken, peas and carrots but if I say I don't want to eat it she'll give me a pop-tart instead" ... what do you think will happen? What choice do you think any child would make in this situation?
I would offer healthy meals and if the child doesn't eat then she doesn't eat. Try again at snack, again at lunch etc. Don't force it, let her make that choice. "Okay Suzie, you're not hungry. Sit until our friends are done." If you don't allow play during mealtimes then don't let her play and if she's disruptful at the table I would remove her and have her sit nearby but away from the group. If this is a regular problem and she is disruptful on regular basis be proactive and maybe have her sit in a high chair "Suzie you're going to sit here in the highchair because you get up during lunch." then try again later at the table "Suzie do you want to sit at the table today? I need you to stay in your seat.." etc. Remove her if she disrupts etc. Wash and repeat.
If she is not thin and frail I'd assume that she is getting at least something in her belly at home so I would just let DCP's know at pick up how much she ate or didn't eat and leave it at that.
Kids have absolute control over only 2 things .. eating and toileting. I don't make an issue with either of these 2 things because it can create long-term issues. Never punish with or over food or toileting.
Heidi 10:35 AM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by MV:
Although I agree with not making food an issue I lean towards more the idea of not saving uneaten meals to be served later. If I serve breakfast and a child does not eat I don't save the food and serve it at snack, the child eats whatever snack I serve the other DCK's at snack time and so forth. I provide the food, the kids decide if they want to eat it or not. I don't force the child to eat it and (IMPO) I would consider serving the food that was refused before instead of what was being served to the rest of the group a lot like trying to force. There's no choice there, it's "eat this or don't eat but I'm not giving you what I'm serving the other kids because you didn't eat this earlier".
What I don't agree with is serving the child whatever he/she wants (referring specifically to the quote above). Allowing a child to eat Pop Tarts all week is like not serving anything at all. There is no nutritional value there whatsoever and in fact you could be creating eating issues thi way as well. "Hmm let's see. Mom wants me to eat chicken, peas and carrots but if I say I don't want to eat it she'll give me a pop-tart instead" ... what do you think will happen? What choice do you think any child would make in this situation?
I would offer healthy meals and if the child doesn't eat then she doesn't eat. Try again at snack, again at lunch etc. Don't force it, let her make that choice. "Okay Suzie, you're not hungry. Sit until our friends are done." If you don't allow play during mealtimes then don't let her play and if she's disruptful at the table I would remove her and have her sit nearby but away from the group. If this is a regular problem and she is disruptful on regular basis be proactive and maybe have her sit in a high chair "Suzie you're going to sit here in the highchair because you get up during lunch." then try again later at the table "Suzie do you want to sit at the table today? I need you to stay in your seat.." etc. Remove her if she disrupts etc. Wash and repeat.
If she is not thin and frail I'd assume that she is getting at least something in her belly at home so I would just let DCP's know at pick up how much she ate or didn't eat and leave it at that.
Kids have absolute control over only 2 things .. eating and toileting. I don't make an issue with either of these 2 things because it can create long-term issues. Never punish with or over food or toileting.
Although I agree with not making food an issue I lean towards more the idea of not saving uneaten meals to be served later. If I serve breakfast and a child does not eat I don't save the food and serve it at snack, the child eats whatever snack I serve the other DCK's at snack time and so forth. I provide the food, the kids decide if they want to eat it or not. I don't force the child to eat it and (IMPO) I would consider serving the food that was refused before instead of what was being served to the rest of the group a lot like trying to force. There's no choice there, it's "eat this or don't eat but I'm not giving you what I'm serving the other kids because you didn't eat this earlier".
What I don't agree with is serving the child whatever he/she wants (referring specifically to the quote above). Allowing a child to eat Pop Tarts all week is like not serving anything at all. There is no nutritional value there whatsoever and in fact you could be creating eating issues thi way as well. "Hmm let's see. Mom wants me to eat chicken, peas and carrots but if I say I don't want to eat it she'll give me a pop-tart instead" ... what do you think will happen? What choice do you think any child would make in this situation?
I would offer healthy meals and if the child doesn't eat then she doesn't eat. Try again at snack, again at lunch etc. Don't force it, let her make that choice. "Okay Suzie, you're not hungry. Sit until our friends are done." If you don't allow play during mealtimes then don't let her play and if she's disruptful at the table I would remove her and have her sit nearby but away from the group. If this is a regular problem and she is disruptful on regular basis be proactive and maybe have her sit in a high chair "Suzie you're going to sit here in the highchair because you get up during lunch." then try again later at the table "Suzie do you want to sit at the table today? I need you to stay in your seat.." etc. Remove her if she disrupts etc. Wash and repeat.
If she is not thin and frail I'd assume that she is getting at least something in her belly at home so I would just let DCP's know at pick up how much she ate or didn't eat and leave it at that.
Kids have absolute control over only 2 things .. eating and toileting. I don't make an issue with either of these 2 things because it can create long-term issues. Never punish with or over food or toileting.
I think it's odd that we spend so much time teaching young children protective behaviors like "don't let people touch you unless you want them to", but then try to force them to eat. Eating is so intimate, when you think about it. It's something goes in one's body.
You know by now I can be a bit of a "tough guy" with kids, but this is one area that I totally respect the child's right to say no.
AmyKidsCo 12:20 PM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by MV:
Kids have absolute control over only 2 things .. eating and toileting. I don't make an issue with either of these 2 things because it can create long-term issues. Never punish with or over food or toileting.
Kids have absolute control over only 2 things .. eating and toileting. I don't make an issue with either of these 2 things because it can create long-term issues. Never punish with or over food or toileting.
Originally Posted by Heidi:
I think it's odd that we spend so much time teaching young children protective behaviors like "don't let people touch you unless you want them to", but then try to force them to eat. Eating is so intimate, when you think about it. It's something goes in one's body.
Ditto both of these statements, as well as most of what everyone else said. I think it's odd that we spend so much time teaching young children protective behaviors like "don't let people touch you unless you want them to", but then try to force them to eat. Eating is so intimate, when you think about it. It's something goes in one's body.
I choose what is offered at meals/snacks, the children choose what and how much (up to a point) to eat. I do encourage "practice bites" but don't force them.
So much of children's "misbehavior" comes from our wrong expectations or because they're trying to find a little control in their own lives. I've found when I change my expectations and give children control whenever I can there's much less "misbehavior" all around.
MarinaVanessa 12:33 PM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by AmyKidsCo:
Ditto both of these statements, as well as most of what everyone else said.
I choose what is offered at meals/snacks, the children choose what and how much (up to a point) to eat. I do encourage "practice bites" but don't force them.
So much of children's "misbehavior" comes from our wrong expectations or because they're trying to find a little control in their own lives. I've found when I change my expectations and give children control whenever I can there's much less "misbehavior" all around.
This is what has had the most impact on me and my daycare. Having realistic expectations of each child and changing my own view (when I was being too strict) has relieved so much stress and the children have noticed I think because they are overall a better group Ditto both of these statements, as well as most of what everyone else said.
I choose what is offered at meals/snacks, the children choose what and how much (up to a point) to eat. I do encourage "practice bites" but don't force them.
So much of children's "misbehavior" comes from our wrong expectations or because they're trying to find a little control in their own lives. I've found when I change my expectations and give children control whenever I can there's much less "misbehavior" all around.
Happily_wed 02:31 PM 07-01-2014
I serve what I want to make and they can either eat it or not. I encourage them to eat a little but I don't force it. I have only had a child throw a fit one time over something. I put salad on her plate and she wouldn't touch it or anything else on the plate until I removed it. I told her no, she didn't have to eat the salad but I was NOT interrupting my lunch to remove it. She had a fit and I removed her from the table. I offered her to come back but she wouldn't so she missed lunch.
I don't save meals. When breakfast is done it's done. When lunch is over, it's over. Each meal is fresh food. We also don't drink all day. They each have a cup of liquid but it stays on the table and they go and get a drink as needed. However I don't allow them to pick it up and just suck down the whole cup. I have one who is addicted to the cup and if I allowed her to she would stand and twirl her hair, go into a daze and just suck on the cup all day long.
I don't save meals. When breakfast is done it's done. When lunch is over, it's over. Each meal is fresh food. We also don't drink all day. They each have a cup of liquid but it stays on the table and they go and get a drink as needed. However I don't allow them to pick it up and just suck down the whole cup. I have one who is addicted to the cup and if I allowed her to she would stand and twirl her hair, go into a daze and just suck on the cup all day long.
MarinaVanessa 02:42 PM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by Happily_wed:
I serve what I want to make and they can either eat it or not. I encourage them to eat a little but I don't force it. I have only had a child throw a fit one time over something. I put salad on her plate and she wouldn't touch it or anything else on the plate until I removed it. I told her no, she didn't have to eat the salad but I was NOT interrupting my lunch to remove it. She had a fit and I removed her from the table. I offered her to come back but she wouldn't so she missed lunch.
I don't save meals. When breakfast is done it's done. When lunch is over, it's over. Each meal is fresh food. We also don't drink all day. They each have a cup of liquid but it stays on the table and they go and get a drink as needed. However I don't allow them to pick it up and just suck down the whole cup. I have one who is addicted to the cup and if I allowed her to she would stand and twirl her hair, go into a daze and just suck on the cup all day long.
This is me to a T except that I have cups of water for each DCK which they can drink out of at any time that they want. Only water though. Milk is served at big meals and they can drink water at snack time. I can understand if you have a girl like this though. For me I'd ask if she was drinking and if she wasn't I'd redirect her to an activity. BUT I'm in CA and I have to provide water at any time they want it.I serve what I want to make and they can either eat it or not. I encourage them to eat a little but I don't force it. I have only had a child throw a fit one time over something. I put salad on her plate and she wouldn't touch it or anything else on the plate until I removed it. I told her no, she didn't have to eat the salad but I was NOT interrupting my lunch to remove it. She had a fit and I removed her from the table. I offered her to come back but she wouldn't so she missed lunch.
I don't save meals. When breakfast is done it's done. When lunch is over, it's over. Each meal is fresh food. We also don't drink all day. They each have a cup of liquid but it stays on the table and they go and get a drink as needed. However I don't allow them to pick it up and just suck down the whole cup. I have one who is addicted to the cup and if I allowed her to she would stand and twirl her hair, go into a daze and just suck on the cup all day long.
Happily_wed 04:24 PM 07-01-2014
Originally Posted by MV:
This is me to a T except that I have cups of water for each DCK which they can drink out of at any time that they want. Only water though. Milk is served at big meals and they can drink water at snack time. I can understand if you have a girl like this though. For me I'd ask if she was drinking and if she wasn't I'd redirect her to an activity. BUT I'm in CA and I have to provide water at any time they want it.
They each have a cup available at all times. It just stays on the table and is not allowed to be carried around with them. They can go to the table and get a drink any time they want. I just have to watch this particular girl because she will take a full cup, go into her daze and stand and suck it all down, then ask for more. If I allowed it she would carry it with her and drink constantly all day long. At meal time I have to watch her like a hawk or she will drink it all immediately and then not eat a bite. She is almost 5 and has been doing this since she started with me at a year old. I think at home they have unlimited access to food and drink at all times and she uses the cup as a comfort type thing. This is me to a T except that I have cups of water for each DCK which they can drink out of at any time that they want. Only water though. Milk is served at big meals and they can drink water at snack time. I can understand if you have a girl like this though. For me I'd ask if she was drinking and if she wasn't I'd redirect her to an activity. BUT I'm in CA and I have to provide water at any time they want it.
I don't serve milk because the family only drinks a lactose brand. It's been my policy with this family that if they want the kids to have it they need to supply it and mom chooses not to. They each drink a huge sippy cup full of chocolate or strawberry milk 5 minutes before they come here. I do juice at breakfast and then water or sometimes kool-aid during the day.