Daycare.com Forum
Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>You Really Hurt Me
daycare 01:20 PM 03-06-2014
I have a dck that is 3.5 months old. The child is VERY slow in anything that he does. LIke, walking to the table, talking, eating, sharing ,etc etc.
The child has only been with us for a few months, is sweet, but I need to find a way to nip this small issue that has not only bothered my staff and I, but has caused DCM to bring it to our attention too.
DCK has pretty good verbal skills, cognitive, not so much.
Another child will touch him, not hard at all and the DCK will dramatically yell, OUCH, you hurt me really bad. I immediately will say NO, you are not hurt, NO one hurt you, go play.
To make matters worse, the child tells the DCP this as soon as they walk in the door or at home. I have told DCM what is going on and the DCM says I want him to be able to validate how he feels. Ok, but he is not hurt. This could have been a pat on the shoulder and he will say this. I did not say much to the DCM, just that the child is over exaggerating the situation and that no one is hurting him, I am 100% certain of that. He never says that it is me or my staff, always another child.
I have read some of your horror stories about kids who make things up, I have never had this happen before to this extent.
Tips, advise, etc...
The child has only been with us for a few months, is sweet, but I need to find a way to nip this small issue that has not only bothered my staff and I, but has caused DCM to bring it to our attention too.
DCK has pretty good verbal skills, cognitive, not so much.
Another child will touch him, not hard at all and the DCK will dramatically yell, OUCH, you hurt me really bad. I immediately will say NO, you are not hurt, NO one hurt you, go play.
To make matters worse, the child tells the DCP this as soon as they walk in the door or at home. I have told DCM what is going on and the DCM says I want him to be able to validate how he feels. Ok, but he is not hurt. This could have been a pat on the shoulder and he will say this. I did not say much to the DCM, just that the child is over exaggerating the situation and that no one is hurting him, I am 100% certain of that. He never says that it is me or my staff, always another child.
I have read some of your horror stories about kids who make things up, I have never had this happen before to this extent.
Tips, advise, etc...
Evansmom 01:29 PM 03-06-2014
My only term that was immediate and with only documented email as further communication (no phone) was in a situation just like this. Child was making up stories about being hit by other children, parents coddled and believed him even though I assured them he was not being hit. It went on for a week when it I occurred to me it was only a matter of time before DCB could make up that I hit him. Next time it happened I termed immediately and like I said, only email communication that I could document. Scared me to no end the possible implications of what could have happened had I let it go on. I realize DCB was only 3 and trying to get attention, but I wasn't taking the chance bc the parents did not trust me enough for it to blow over.
nannyde 01:30 PM 03-06-2014
I would nickname him HurtMe
daycare 01:56 PM 03-06-2014
Originally Posted by Evansmom:
My only term that was immediate and with only documented email as further communication (no phone) was in a situation just like this. Child was making up stories about being hit by other children, parents coddled and believed him even though I assured them he was not being hit. It went on for a week when it I occurred to me it was only a matter of time before DCB could make up that I hit him. Next time it happened I termed immediately and like I said, only email communication that I could document. Scared me to no end the possible implications of what could have happened had I let it go on. I realize DCB was only 3 and trying to get attention, but I wasn't taking the chance bc the parents did not trust me enough for it to blow over.
The dcp have been over the top great, but you know the saying blood is thicker than water even though the child is 3. I am going to email the mom now and let her know that it happened again today and that I am not up to deal with this matter in the long term. The safety and well being is my number one concern and priority of every child here and I don't take it lightly when someone says you hurt me....................My only term that was immediate and with only documented email as further communication (no phone) was in a situation just like this. Child was making up stories about being hit by other children, parents coddled and believed him even though I assured them he was not being hit. It went on for a week when it I occurred to me it was only a matter of time before DCB could make up that I hit him. Next time it happened I termed immediately and like I said, only email communication that I could document. Scared me to no end the possible implications of what could have happened had I let it go on. I realize DCB was only 3 and trying to get attention, but I wasn't taking the chance bc the parents did not trust me enough for it to blow over.
thanks for sharing your story
daycare 01:57 PM 03-06-2014
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I would nickname him HurtMe
ok.........Nan you have to explain that one.............I would nickname him HurtMe
melskids 02:01 PM 03-06-2014
Could he have SPD?
daycare 02:03 PM 03-06-2014
Originally Posted by melskids:
Could he have SPD?
I dont know. the child is new and I have not gotten to learn quite that much about the child. the child is well behaved, listens most of the time, is gentle, but does seem to be overly sensitive.Could he have SPD?
nannyde 02:29 PM 03-06-2014
Originally Posted by daycare:
ok.........Nan you have to explain that one.............
https://www.daycare.com/forum/showth...ghlight=hermieok.........Nan you have to explain that one.............
daycare 02:32 PM 03-06-2014
so what would you do if the child goes home and says everyone calls me herrmie or you hurt me??? do you think that the parent will see it as the name calling?
nannyde 02:47 PM 03-06-2014
Originally Posted by daycare:
so what would you do if the child goes home and says everyone calls me herrmie or you hurt me??? do you think that the parent will see it as the name calling?
I would just tell them this is how I will handle it.so what would you do if the child goes home and says everyone calls me herrmie or you hurt me??? do you think that the parent will see it as the name calling?
daycare 02:49 PM 03-06-2014
Originally Posted by nannyde:
I would just tell them this is how I will handle it.
I am sure my DCP don't see me like they would see you. DO you think if I said that I would get away with it?I would just tell them this is how I will handle it.