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kayla 09:12 AM 02-27-2012
so yeah this is def the last time i ever call cps, they didnt do anything and im sure ill be hearing from the parent... any advice on what i should say when she brings up that a social worker was at my house talking to her son??? also i gave the father a termination notice this is causing me way to mmuch stress to keep the child.. the social worker came and she talked to him but she just kept saying oh it sounds like they have a busy house and making up a ton of excuses for their bad parenting... why o why do i care if no one else does...
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SilverSabre25 09:18 AM 02-27-2012
Because the report has been made. It's on file.

The next time something happens (if something does) and there's a report made...the file gets thicker.

And again. And again. And eventually, they will see there is a pattern and things will be looked into further.

Your butt is covered if something more serious happens. By law, you are required to report even suspected child abuse, and you can be held liable if they feel that you could have done more and didn't.

And if there is abuse going on and even if it's never caught, that child is going to know that SOMEONE cares, SOMEONE believes him, SOMEONE will help him if he needs it.
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Ariana 09:22 AM 02-27-2012
Because if anything ever happens you can go to sleep at night knowing you did what you could. That's the best peace of mind anyone could ask for IMO.

I saw a terrible story on Dr. Phil about a little girl locked in a closet and although social workers were sent to this home countless times, they failed to see anything going on. Unfortunately what else can you do but report it
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familyschoolcare 10:09 AM 02-27-2012
Originally Posted by kayla:
so yeah this is def the last time i ever call cps, they didnt do anything and im sure ill be hearing from the parent... any advice on what i should say when she brings up that a social worker was at my house talking to her son??? also i gave the father a termination notice this is causing me way to mmuch stress to keep the child.. the social worker came and she talked to him but she just kept saying oh it sounds like they have a busy house and making up a ton of excuses for their bad parenting... why o why do i care if no one else does...
The truth.

Because of what DCB said and the marks on him, you where required by law to call CPS. CPS came and did what they are supposed to. If the parent has any further question tell them to ask CPS. Remind the Parent that your part in all of this ended when you called CPS as the law trequires you to.
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Heidi 10:10 AM 02-27-2012
Kayla-

You did you job, and you did the right thing.

BTW, just because the caseworker kept her reactions low key, doesn't necessarily mean she didn't take things seriously. I am pretty sure they cannot ask leading questions, and they can't "fuel the fire". In theory, they are trained to ask the right questions the right way...
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AmyLeigh 10:27 AM 02-27-2012
Originally Posted by bbo:
Kayla-

You did you job, and you did the right thing.

BTW, just because the caseworker kept her reactions low key, doesn't necessarily mean she didn't take things seriously. I am pretty sure they cannot ask leading questions, and they can't "fuel the fire". In theory, they are trained to ask the right questions the right way...
Exactly. Due to confidentiality, the worker can't tell you what actions the agency is taking right now.
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Blackcat31 10:44 AM 02-27-2012
Kayla~ (sorry this is long...)

A few years ago, I reported a mother who had 2 (and later on 3) kids in care for some really bad things. I reported her to CPS atleast a dozen and a half times. Each time, I felt as though nothing was done. I kept the kids in care because I believed that at least during the day (M-F) they were safe. Mom never mentioned to me that she was at all aware of the fact that I turned her in or that anyone had turned her in.

My heart broke daily for the stories these kids told me. I listened, I documented and I reported. Every. single. time.

I went through a phase of being really angry at social services for not intervening and helping these kids. In all honesty, it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. But I kept reporting everything because I still believed that some day they would do something for these kids.

This went on for 3 FULL years. In the end, after the birth of another child, CPS finally did something. I couldn't believe it had taken so long.
I spoke with a Guardian Ad Litem for the children and he said that they finally removed the children from the mother's custody because after 3 years and ALL the reports I made, that they knew beyond a reasonable doubt that there was sufficient evident to remove (and keep) the kids from the mother. He said that if they had done it sooner, the kids would have been placed in foster care, mom would have gotten them back and they would probably have gone elsewhere for childcare and who knows how they would have been able to keep an eye out for them.

That would have been the repeated cycle for years to come. Take kids, put them in foster care, give them back, take kids, put them in foster care, give them back...etc etc...

The file of reports and "information" I supplied to them while they were building this case was seriously 3 inches thick!

Anyways, the point of my story is that looking back on it today, I can now see why they acted as they did. They were building a good case against the mom and they also knew the kids were safe with one consistent caregiver and not having to be in and out of the foster care system.

These kids were taken from their mother and placed in care with their grandmother and avoided foster care all together. The mom also received the help she needed (mental illness was the root of all this) and the family has gotten better so in the end, it did work out for the best.

I, however, will probably never be the same as the whole experience had a very profound effect on me and the level of attachment I allow (or rather don't allow anymore) with the kids I currently care for, but you know what? I see these girls now and then and every time I see them, they run up and hug me like they haven't seen me in years and every time they tell me thank you for caring about them.

So I do believe it was worth it in the end and like other poster's have said, at the end of the day, no matter what the outcome (if any) you still did the right thing and really that is all that matters.
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Cat Herder 11:35 AM 02-27-2012
CPS are trained to show no emotion and act casually during the investigation process.

It is one of the hardest parts of the job.
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Lilbutterflie 11:51 AM 02-27-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Kayla~ (sorry this is long...)

A few years ago, I reported a mother who had 2 (and later on 3) kids in care for some really bad things. I reported her to CPS atleast a dozen and a half times. Each time, I felt as though nothing was done. I kept the kids in care because I believed that at least during the day (M-F) they were safe. Mom never mentioned to me that she was at all aware of the fact that I turned her in or that anyone had turned her in.

My heart broke daily for the stories these kids told me. I listened, I documented and I reported. Every. single. time.

I went through a phase of being really angry at social services for not intervening and helping these kids. In all honesty, it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. But I kept reporting everything because I still believed that some day they would do something for these kids.

This went on for 3 FULL years. In the end, after the birth of another child, CPS finally did something. I couldn't believe it had taken so long.
I spoke with a Guardian Ad Litem for the children and he said that they finally removed the children from the mother's custody because after 3 years and ALL the reports I made, that they knew beyond a reasonable doubt that there was sufficient evident to remove (and keep) the kids from the mother. He said that if they had done it sooner, the kids would have been placed in foster care, mom would have gotten them back and they would probably have gone elsewhere for childcare and who knows how they would have been able to keep an eye out for them.

That would have been the repeated cycle for years to come. Take kids, put them in foster care, give them back, take kids, put them in foster care, give them back...etc etc...

The file of reports and "information" I supplied to them while they were building this case was seriously 3 inches thick!

Anyways, the point of my story is that looking back on it today, I can now see why they acted as they did. They were building a good case against the mom and they also knew the kids were safe with one consistent caregiver and not having to be in and out of the foster care system.

These kids were taken from their mother and placed in care with their grandmother and avoided foster care all together. The mom also received the help she needed (mental illness was the root of all this) and the family has gotten better so in the end, it did work out for the best.

I, however, will probably never be the same as the whole experience had a very profound effect on me and the level of attachment I allow (or rather don't allow anymore) with the kids I currently care for, but you know what? I see these girls now and then and every time I see them, they run up and hug me like they haven't seen me in years and every time they tell me thank you for caring about them.

So I do believe it was worth it in the end and like other poster's have said, at the end of the day, no matter what the outcome (if any) you still did the right thing and really that is all that matters.
I cried reading your story Blackcat. Truly you are an angel for those girls. Thank you for your persistence and patience; you know you surely had a profound effect on their lives.

I also have had to call CPS and the case was dropped. But, it's on file and I know if the incident I had to report happens again that it will help them build their case. My friend is also a school counselor; and she is practically calling CPS every week. She has told me some very, very sad stories of abuse and neglect; in which CPS just filed away. I don't really understand it; I still believe they need to act much sooner. But that's just me.
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AmyLeigh 12:15 PM 02-27-2012
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Kayla~ (sorry this is long...)

A few years ago, I reported a mother who had 2 (and later on 3) kids in care for some really bad things. I reported her to CPS atleast a dozen and a half times. Each time, I felt as though nothing was done. I kept the kids in care because I believed that at least during the day (M-F) they were safe. Mom never mentioned to me that she was at all aware of the fact that I turned her in or that anyone had turned her in.

My heart broke daily for the stories these kids told me. I listened, I documented and I reported. Every. single. time.

I went through a phase of being really angry at social services for not intervening and helping these kids. In all honesty, it was the hardest thing I have ever had to do. But I kept reporting everything because I still believed that some day they would do something for these kids.

This went on for 3 FULL years. In the end, after the birth of another child, CPS finally did something. I couldn't believe it had taken so long.
I spoke with a Guardian Ad Litem for the children and he said that they finally removed the children from the mother's custody because after 3 years and ALL the reports I made, that they knew beyond a reasonable doubt that there was sufficient evident to remove (and keep) the kids from the mother. He said that if they had done it sooner, the kids would have been placed in foster care, mom would have gotten them back and they would probably have gone elsewhere for childcare and who knows how they would have been able to keep an eye out for them.

That would have been the repeated cycle for years to come. Take kids, put them in foster care, give them back, take kids, put them in foster care, give them back...etc etc...

The file of reports and "information" I supplied to them while they were building this case was seriously 3 inches thick!

Anyways, the point of my story is that looking back on it today, I can now see why they acted as they did. They were building a good case against the mom and they also knew the kids were safe with one consistent caregiver and not having to be in and out of the foster care system.

These kids were taken from their mother and placed in care with their grandmother and avoided foster care all together. The mom also received the help she needed (mental illness was the root of all this) and the family has gotten better so in the end, it did work out for the best.

I, however, will probably never be the same as the whole experience had a very profound effect on me and the level of attachment I allow (or rather don't allow anymore) with the kids I currently care for, but you know what? I see these girls now and then and every time I see them, they run up and hug me like they haven't seen me in years and every time they tell me thank you for caring about them.

So I do believe it was worth it in the end and like other poster's have said, at the end of the day, no matter what the outcome (if any) you still did the right thing and really that is all that matters.
Three inches is nothing, ladies. I have moved files so thick, they had their own drawer in the filing cabinet!
Just as workers know what questions to ask, abusive families know how to answer the questions. After a while, they get tripped up in their own lies. The state(s) has specific regulations when it comes to removing children from care. It is the absolute last resort. Many times, they will offer services to the families to prevent having to remove the children. Mental health, anger management, addiction services, and the like are used to keep the families together.
Please continue to report what you see, then let the agency take over. Do your job in caring for the children, and they will do their job in investigating reports.
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Blackcat31 12:22 PM 02-27-2012
Originally Posted by AmyLeigh:
Three inches is nothing, ladies. I have moved files so thick, they had their own drawer in the filing cabinet!
Just as workers know what questions to ask, abusive families know how to answer the questions. After a while, they get tripped up in their own lies. The state(s) has specific regulations when it comes to removing children from care. It is the absolute last resort. Many times, they will offer services to the families to prevent having to remove the children. Mental health, anger management, addiction services, and the like are used to keep the families together.
Please continue to report what you see, then let the agency take over. Do your job in caring for the children, and they will do their job in investigating reports.
That is soooo sad.

You definitely hit the nail on the head though when you said abusive families know what to say and not to say and that is exactly what happened in my case. So I most definitely agree that we need to just continue doing our job (caring for the kids and reporting when necessary) and let the agencies do their parts...no matter how hard.
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kayla 12:25 PM 02-27-2012
I will keep reporting, it just hurts to know that nothing is going to happen until there is a ton of info to back it up.. It is frustrating and exhausting.
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Tags:cps, mandated reporter
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