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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>He's Not Going To Live Till He's Two
Childminder 10:18 AM 02-06-2014
DCB-17mo shows up at daycare after being sick for twelve days with lacerations all over his hands and face and neck. Mom says that his brother-almost 3 got a pair of scissors and cut him. She said that she got home from work, at 9pm and baby was asleep in his crib, brother asleep on the couch and DCD asleep in bed. She ran out for an hour to the store and when she got back brother was off the couch and the baby was crying in his crib, dad still asleep. She took him to ER and he had 6 cuts they sealed with glue. CPS has been called and is investigating.

This baby has been in hospital or ER on multiple occasions because his mother does NOT supervise them. Once his brother dumped a bottle of nail polish all over his head, eyes, ears, and mouth. Another trip because he was sprayed by a can of carpet cleaner which resulted in his developing pneumonia and a 6 day stay in hospital.

I can't put too much blame on DCD he just re-entered their life after two years in rehab and jail. Mom is young but that's not an excuse. She just doesn't watch them and it frightens me.

Boys are so much better off in childcare, really good kids. They show up every day late, with out proper clothing and supplies. They are state subsidy and I have had problems with copays on occasion but she has always gotten caught up before. I'm afraid that now dad is back she's gonna get pregnant again. This is a case, imo, where a parent should be sterilized.

Btw, baby is a cleft palate baby and FTT. He weighs 16 lbs.
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Cat Herder 10:23 AM 02-06-2014
I am so sorry

Hopefully the ER staff willl follow through....

Just awful.
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CraftyMom 10:26 AM 02-06-2014
Wow! Aside from lack of supervision there is clearly no child proofing at all! Scissors and nail polish remover and carpet cleaner in reach of children. I can only imagine what else has happened or what will happen
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jenboo 10:27 AM 02-06-2014
Thank goodness CPS is involved!! I really hope that everything works out for the best interests of the children. Those poor kiddos
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Hollydawn 10:33 AM 02-06-2014
This is horrifying. I hope that CPS follows through. It sounds like the children need to be removed from the home until the parents better able to care for them.
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BumbleBee 11:00 AM 02-06-2014
Yikes! I have a family similar to this, kids are 3.5 & 5.

The latest happened 2 days ago-3 yo fell face first down a full set of uncarpeted stairs. I know things happen & the 3 yo was messing around but dcm didn't even take him in.
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Cradle2crayons 11:08 AM 02-06-2014
My family of three is like this. The dad is in jail due to get out in the next month. I'm not sure if that's good or bad really. They are subsidy too but have to pay the difference. Mom lies a lot, is in trouble with truancy related to the almost seven year old son who is repeating kindy... And doesn't supervise at all. If it wasn't for the boy, the two smaller ones would be in danger. They get into old food and etc but because of the boy they haven't been seriously hurt YET. cps here is too busy to do anything.

Just last week, the small one got a hold of hand sanitizer and squirted all over the boys head while he was sleeping. Nobody was hurt. This mom doesn't lock up cleaning stuff or anything dangerous. The sanitizer surprised me because these kids have very poor hygiene so I can't imagine they actually USE sanitizer...

I worrye very day about their safety but I've done all I can by reporting. I can't do anything else but pray.
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daycarediva 11:10 AM 02-06-2014
How sad. My thoughts are with those little boys. So glad CPS is involved.
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Play Care 11:19 AM 02-06-2014
That's awful. Have you reported them?
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MotherNature 11:30 AM 02-06-2014
wow-how awful. And how the hell could dad remain asleep when you know that toddler was shrieking and screaming as he was being cut???!!! Also, what a twisted little child to continually keep on doing that. Once, for curiosity, ok, maybe...but seeing that it caused their brother all that pain to continue? Therapy time...those poor kids. Do you think the kid actually did it?
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CraftyMom 11:35 AM 02-06-2014
I would call your licensor to cover your butt and let them know what is going on. You don't want it somehow turned around that this happened in your home
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Childminder 12:09 PM 02-06-2014
Originally Posted by CraftyMom:
I would call your licensor to cover your butt and let them know what is going on. You don't want it somehow turned around that this happened in your home
I have voiced my concerns with CPS but because nothing has happened in my presence they aren't concerned with hearsay. Hopefully these incidents that resulted in hospital visits have CPS concerned enough.

The child was not in my care at the time of these episodes and the parent took them in from home as they have happened there. Hopefully the same hospital and urgent care facility has been used so that all kinds of flags are being raised.

Mom said that she was questioned by four different doctors/persons at ER and that CPS called in the morning and insisted on a immediate child visit and went to where they boys were. They will now do a home visit to check their living situation.
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melilley 12:12 PM 02-06-2014
Oh wow, I'm in shock. I can't believe that that happened, how sad. I'm glad cps is involved.
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NeedaVaca 12:22 PM 02-06-2014
Originally Posted by MotherNature:
wow-how awful. And how the hell could dad remain asleep when you know that toddler was shrieking and screaming as he was being cut???!!! Also, what a twisted little child to continually keep on doing that. Once, for curiosity, ok, maybe...but seeing that it caused their brother all that pain to continue? Therapy time...those poor kids. Do you think the kid actually did it?
exactly what I thought! Who could sleep through the screaming that must have happened?
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Meeko 12:48 PM 02-06-2014
I took care of two boys who lived about a block away. They were cute kids, but completely neglected at home. Mom was too concerned with her string of boyfriends, her witch-length nails etc. After a while I had to let them go because of too many issues and policy violations.

One day. my daughter came home from school and told me she could see smoke down the road. Then we could hear sirens. I just KNEW those boys had set fire to the house. Their mom used to let them play with her lighter!

Sure enough, she was out partying, grandma was at work and teen sister was supposed to be watching them and had fallen asleep on the couch.

The boys took one of the lighters that littered the house and set fire to the comforter in their bedroom.

Luckily the humans got out,,,grandma's dog didn't

The house was burned to the ground.

Mom eventually lost custody to the boys fathers....both of whom were a waste of space when young, but both turned themselves around. The last time I saw the boys (now teens), they told me their mom was living in Salt Lake City in a run down mobile home and was a meth addict.....she had another baby girl, but she was taken by social services....so sad.

The boys live quite close to each other and their dads were good about making sure they got plenty of time together as they grew.

I'm happy the boys both have good homes now though. It could have turned out so different.
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spud912 02:11 PM 02-06-2014
This is just awful! How could that older boy do that to his younger sibling? Wow! I hope the investigation is thorough!
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Leigh 02:25 PM 02-06-2014
You need to call CPS and give them the info you have, as well. This mom needs help with learning how to parent. I would have reported it myself.
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tehck_1013 01:23 PM 05-25-2014
Originally Posted by MotherNature:
wow-how awful. And how the hell could dad remain asleep when you know that toddler was shrieking and screaming as he was being cut???!!! Also, what a twisted little child to continually keep on doing that. Once, for curiosity, ok, maybe...but seeing that it caused their brother all that pain to continue? Therapy time...those poor kids. Do you think the kid actually did it?
What child wakes up after being asleep to randomly go get a pair of scissors and slice up his sibling? After my son is asleep, bombs could be exploding outside his window and it wouldn't wake him up... However, when he wakes up on his own at night, his first thoughts are 'BATHROOM' not 'hmmmm...... i'm gonna go hurt my sister MUAHAHAHA.' Idk, I just don't think that story adds up much and so it's really good that CPS got involved.

I just don't understand families abusive home lives. It just puzzles me. Its always either emotional abuse, physical abuse, or neglect like this story. And here I am over here watching my kids play matchbox cars on the living room floor and just promised them a couple rounds of Go Fish here in a few minutes... How hard is it, ya know?

I just scarred myself for life about a month ago watching "Speak 4 Those That Can't" videos on youtube, sobbing like a little baby. Sealed the deal for reasoning behind why I'm trying to do this. I guess there's reasons why good child care providers are put here on this earth because they make the difference in childrens' lives, even if by only a few. We can't change what happens at home but we can keep them safe when they are in our care
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Blackcat31 04:22 PM 05-25-2014
Originally Posted by tehck_1013:
What child wakes up after being asleep to randomly go get a pair of scissors and slice up his sibling? After my son is asleep, bombs could be exploding outside his window and it wouldn't wake him up... However, when he wakes up on his own at night, his first thoughts are 'BATHROOM' not 'hmmmm...... i'm gonna go hurt my sister MUAHAHAHA.' Idk, I just don't think that story adds up much and so it's really good that CPS got involved.

I just don't understand families abusive home lives. It just puzzles me. Its always either emotional abuse, physical abuse, or neglect like this story. And here I am over here watching my kids play matchbox cars on the living room floor and just promised them a couple rounds of Go Fish here in a few minutes... How hard is it, ya know?

I just scarred myself for life about a month ago watching "Speak 4 Those That Can't" videos on youtube, sobbing like a little baby. Sealed the deal for reasoning behind why I'm trying to do this. I guess there's reasons why good child care providers are put here on this earth because they make the difference in childrens' lives, even if by only a few. We can't change what happens at home but we can keep them safe when they are in our care
It's hard when you don't know how to parent. Generations of parents grew up in the system where "parenting skills" weren't role modeled or taught to them.

It's hard when you are trying to keep your family together but you either lack the knowledge, support, income or skills to do so.

It's hard when one or both parents suffer from addiction

It's even harder when there is mental illness involved.

It's hard when you really don't have any idea what is or isn't the right way to do things....so you work as much as you can, try to keep everyone healthy, happy and safe but sometimes have to choose because you DO KNOW you aren't going to get all of them.


I've cared for many families that had bad situations going on in their home lives and I tried to help the best I could but sometimes, just being the one consistent place for a child is hard too. Sometimes, that isn't always whats best either.

I don't know....

I just wanted to comment on your comment "How hard is it, ya know?"
because we DON'T know.

Sometimes it IS hard.
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MarinaVanessa 07:58 PM 05-25-2014
I've often wondered about this family. Is there any updates on how they are doing and whether or not they got help? I really hope this family got support for the problems they were having with older DS.
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CtheLove 09:51 PM 05-25-2014
I think what it comes down to is mental illness. There is a lot of mental illness that runs in my family and I know how bad it can effect some one. How it can effect your decision making and your judgment on a lot of things. What most people think is common sense is not to them any more. Like meeko's story I'm glad that the boys were removed for the mothers care, but what help did the mother get, probably none. This happened to an Aunt of mine she really just lost it after her mother died and did some really stupid **** and had her son taken away. They gave custody to the father which in this case wasn't any better (who had drug and alcohol problems) but they didn't check that out before placing my cousin into his care. But they didn't offer to get her any help to get better and get her son back, my mother (her sister) helped get assistants to see a doctor and get meds and straighten out her life again and it took her 10 years to get full custody of her son back even thu she had gotten better with in 2 years and was paying child support plus buying them groceries, paying the phone bill, paying for new clothes and school supplies and just about everything else.

I regress, my point is, is that I think it really comes down to mental illness even depression. I don't think every case the first response should be pulling the kids out it should be getting the parents help as in therapy, medication, or educational classes or all three.

Also kinda like what Blackcat was saying there is some people out there that just don't know, for what ever reason, what is right and wrong when it comes to kids. As providers most of us that are on here are licensed and we have access to the most updated educational classes about young children that other parents don't. Maybe we should try to pass on what we have learned to the parents and not just assume that since we know this stuff now the parents also do to.

Sorry this was so long and I don't want any one think that I''m trying to 'attack' anyone's comments on here, these are just my thoughts and I just wanted to share them.
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Childminder 01:58 PM 05-26-2014
After questioning the older boy myself I truly believe he was trying to cut his brother's hair. As far as the other episodes of behavior, the parents just don't watch the children as they should. They need to attend parenting classes at the very least, imo.

MV. I have lost contact with the family other than an update in April to the babies cleft surgery and a Happy Mother's Day text with photo of the baby's new lip.

A little awkward to call and ask, "BTW has anything else happened that CPS was called?" Kwim?
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Tags:mandated reporter, neglect, parental life choices
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