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Old 07-27-2011, 10:25 AM
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JaydensMommy JaydensMommy is offline
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Default Feeling Overwhelmed..

So right now .. I have my 2- 4 yr olds, 1-2 yr old, 1- 3 yr old and 1 - 10 month old. Not all of the children have started yet but will in the next couple weeks. I usually have the 10 month old, and 2- 4 yr olds right now. Well the problem is with the 10 month old. He cries constantly.. When he gets here he is crying.. I put him down for a nap around 9 then he is happy for a little bit.. but he'll start crying for no reason all the time. I would think at this age he would be able to play for longer.. It's just really hard for me with the other children, I feel like I can't do what I'd really like to do with them because most of my attention is focused on the baby. And when the other two kids start I feel it's only going to be harder. I'm no longer taking any more babies and sometimes feel like I should term this one and make my job easier. But the reason I don't is I really like the parents and know that they really like it here. I don't think I would have much trouble filling the spot though. But I know my days would be so much easier if I just had the older kids.......
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Old 07-27-2011, 11:42 AM
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I think you should term the 10 month old. You have already committed to these other families so the decision needs to be based on what is best for the group. Nothing is going to magically happen anytime soon with this little one. Sounds like a typical rage baby and it takes a lot of time and work to get rid of those habits and very likely would be a challenge long term. I understand that you love the family as a whole but again, you have to choose what is best for the group and that includes what is best for your sanity.
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Old 07-27-2011, 11:51 AM
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I had this same issue back in March. I had a 9mo old who I had since he was 4mo old. He was a rough baby to start with and I thought it was something he would grow out of... well he didn't. All he did was cry and not just whine... it was full blown screaming!!! ALL DAY... EVERY DAY!! The only time he stopped was if if was holding him, he was sleeping, he was eating, or there were NO other kids around. (That's hard cuz I have 2 kids of my own and 5 DCK at the time) It finally got to the point one day where he cried and wouldn't even settle down to eat. He made not only myself stress but all the other kids stress too. We were not able to go for walks... cuz he screamed... couldn't go to the park... cuz he screamed... ect ect. I finally decided it's not far to me, the other kids in my daycare but most of all it wasn't fair to him. It was super hard for me to terminate for the fact that I am VERY good friends with his grandma and his uncle but I had to do what was best for ALL of us.
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Old 07-27-2011, 01:06 PM
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The first week I had him I almost termed him because he would literally cry non-stop, wouldn't even eat because he was crying so much. Grandma has watched him until now(I've had him about 2 months), but grandma has cancer and so she can't watch him anymore. Another reason I feel bad. But he has gotten better since that first week and I thought he would continue to get better but he really hasn't. I know that it's not fair to the other kids because I'm constantly stressed out and also not able to take them outside as much as I'd like. Hopefully I can figure out a way to do this...
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Old 07-27-2011, 01:19 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JaydensMommy View Post
The first week I had him I almost termed him because he would literally cry non-stop, wouldn't even eat because he was crying so much. Grandma has watched him until now(I've had him about 2 months), but grandma has cancer and so she can't watch him anymore. Another reason I feel bad. But he has gotten better since that first week and I thought he would continue to get better but he really hasn't. I know that it's not fair to the other kids because I'm constantly stressed out and also not able to take them outside as much as I'd like. Hopefully I can figure out a way to do this...
I think you should give yourself a timeline. Like two weeks or 30 days or whatever you can honestly endure and try to make it work. But in that time frame you have to make sure you are doing whatever you can to teach this little one to play by himself and with other dck's and not cry every time he is not being held. You also need to make sure the parents are working with you and helping teach the child the same things at home. If they are simply holding him to shut him up and you are trying at daycare to do the opposite...for lack of better words, you will be screwed. LOL!

Tolerating him for a set amount of time kind of makes you feel different about the whole thing. If it works out, then yah! for you, him and everyone else.

If it doesn't work, you can at least say you did give it your all.

It seems like we never really know how bad it is/was until the problem child is no longer attending and we see how nice (quiet) it is without them. LOL!!
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Old 07-27-2011, 02:32 PM
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Have you talked to the parents about this? Is he like this at home? Have they taken him to the dr to find out if there is anything medically wrong with him?
This would be stressful. Like Blackcat suggested a timeline would be something worth trying. Unless you have already kind of done this in your head already.
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Old 07-28-2011, 09:04 AM
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Thanks for the advice everyone. I have spoke to mom about it, she told me he does fine at home on his own. She has told me she does not hold him constantly. I don't hold him here if he cries. I try to play with him and distract him. I think I will give it some more time and hopefully he will adjust. Maybe another month would be fair.
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Old 08-03-2011, 02:21 PM
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Ok, so it's a week later, this child is still driving me crazy. As soon as he is dropped off he is crying, play time inside or outside he is crying. Lunch time he is crying, it's not non-stop but he's happy for like 10 minutes at a time. So... I've decided to make my life easier and term him. I want to let mom know today, grandma is in town though so mom won't be picking him up. I really like his parents and that is why this is so hard for me and I know his mom loves him being here with me and she was really happy when she found me.. But I just don't feel like I can take care of him and still do things with the older kids... Any suggestions on what I should say, the rest of my kids are 2 and older with the exception of a 4 month old(good baby) that comes for about 3 hours in the afternoons...
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Old 08-03-2011, 02:30 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JaydensMommy View Post
Ok, so it's a week later, this child is still driving me crazy. As soon as he is dropped off he is crying, play time inside or outside he is crying. Lunch time he is crying, it's not non-stop but he's happy for like 10 minutes at a time. So... I've decided to make my life easier and term him. I want to let mom know today, grandma is in town though so mom won't be picking him up. I really like his parents and that is why this is so hard for me and I know his mom loves him being here with me and she was really happy when she found me.. But I just don't feel like I can take care of him and still do things with the older kids... Any suggestions on what I should say, the rest of my kids are 2 and older with the exception of a 4 month old(good baby) that comes for about 3 hours in the afternoons...
I would just tell her that he hasn't settled down yet so it isn't working for him being with you. Since he's really easy going at home and is able to be on his own without being held and having a lot of one to one then THAT means that he has the ability to be happy most of the time IF he's in the right environment. He just needs to be in care where it is like the care he has at home. He shouldn't have to be so upset... it's not best for him.
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