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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>How Would You Answer This Text?
Msdunny 02:50 PM 01-30-2013
I just received the following in a text from one of my DCMs: "Hey just wondering how the kids are doing lessons wise."

I do use a curriculum with my kids, but because of my kids' age range (18 months to almost 5), it is not structured. It usually gives me a jumping off point each day. Today was warm, so we played outside for quite a while. Only one "crafty" item went home. I do sit with my 2 4 year olds for a little while each day to work on writing skills, but again, not too structured. Her 4 (almost 5 year old) is advanced for her age when it comes to doing worksheets, but needs a lot of work on social skills. Her kids have only been with me for 2 months. From what I can tell, they came from a preschool center that focused strongly on worksheets and such, but I am not seeing interpersonal skills, KWIM?

My mom had been very sick recently, and died last Friday, so my lesson plans have not been up to par. I feel like she may be asking because she hasn't seen a lot of worksheets come home recently. I just don't know how to answer the text. I want to say "they are 3 and 4, and we are having fun playing", but alas, that is not how I roll!! this mom is also an old friend, though not a close friend.

Sooooo...very long story, short - how would answer a text like this?
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Blackcat31 02:53 PM 01-30-2013
I would say "Why? Do you have any concerns or specific worries about either of them?"

Play IS a child's curriculum. Never under estimate it's value. I make it very clear to my daycare parents that is how I feel.

I would respond with a question as that will allow the DCM to clarify what she is getting at.

You will know how to respond from there.
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daycare 02:54 PM 01-30-2013
Originally Posted by Msdunny:
I just received the following in a text from one of my DCMs: "Hey just wondering how the kids are doing lessons wise."

I do use a curriculum with my kids, but because of my kids' age range (18 months to almost 5), it is not structured. It usually gives me a jumping off point each day. Today was warm, so we played outside for quite a while. Only one "crafty" item went home. I do sit with my 2 4 year olds for a little while each day to work on writing skills, but again, not too structured. Her 4 (almost 5 year old) is advanced for her age when it comes to doing worksheets, but needs a lot of work on social skills. Her kids have only been with me for 2 months. From what I can tell, they came from a preschool center that focused strongly on worksheets and such, but I am not seeing interpersonal skills, KWIM?

My mom had been very sick recently, and died last Friday, so my lesson plans have not been up to par. I feel like she may be asking because she hasn't seen a lot of worksheets come home recently. I just don't know how to answer the text. I want to say "they are 3 and 4, and we are having fun playing", but alas, that is not how I roll!! this mom is also an old friend, though not a close friend.

Sooooo...very long story, short - how would answer a text like this?
I hate work sheets for kid under 4.5.

I would tell dcm that we do a lot of hands on learn through play. What we are doing is about the process and does not always produce a product.

I take a lot of pics of the kids in action in my daycare and post them to my website, because they can't see what their child is learning. I don't do daily crafts, worksheets or anything that gives a daily product.
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Meeko 03:17 PM 01-30-2013
First of all. I am so sorry for the loss of your mom. Hugs comin' your way....

It can be difficult for some parents to understand that kids learn in many ways.

I personally do not like worksheets. I explain this to parents at interview time.

For example, instead of sending home a worksheet with a picture of an apple and it's parts and have the child color it,........we will cut open apples, talk about how they smell and taste and then make some apple pie or bread or such. We'll read books about apples and have apples for snack. I think the kids learn more by touching and doing. They may not take anything home at all.

There is a great poem about "Nothing in my bag today" (can't find it right now) but it (gently) explains to parents that kids learn by DOING and PLAYING. I will try and find it for you.
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daycare 03:21 PM 01-30-2013
I missed the part about your mom. Is the parent aware of this?

I recently have had to deal with stuff about my mothers health too, which took me for a spin in my mind. I informed the dcp that I was sorry if I seemed a little off, but this is why. Everyone of the families was very understanding....
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Sugar Magnolia 03:27 PM 01-30-2013
"Fine"
Sorry for your loss. (((hugs)))
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Msdunny 03:29 PM 01-30-2013
Originally Posted by Meeko:
For example, instead of sending home a worksheet with a picture of an apple and it's parts and have the child color it,........we will cut open apples, talk about how they smell and taste and then make some apple pie or bread or such. We'll read books about apples and have apples for snack. I think the kids learn more by touching and doing. They may not take anything home at all.

There is a great poem about "Nothing in my bag today" (can't find it right now) but it (gently) explains to parents that kids learn by DOING and PLAYING. I will try and find it for you.
This sounds exactly like our days!! I haven't posted pictures lately, with everything going on with me personally.

Blackcat, I think I will respond by asking if she has any particular concerns.

Thanks for the help, folks, and for the thoughts for our family. I didn't realize this would be as difficult as it has been - remaining cheerful for the children all day, while dealing with this grief. They have made me laugh this week, though!
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Msdunny 03:34 PM 01-30-2013
Originally Posted by daycare:
I missed the part about your mom. Is the parent aware of this?

I recently have had to deal with stuff about my mothers health too, which took me for a spin in my mind. I informed the dcp that I was sorry if I seemed a little off, but this is why. Everyone of the families was very understanding....
Yes, all my parents are aware. We knew that my mother only a couple of weeks to live, so I had informed them of what would happen if there were any emergencies and I had to leave. I texted them as soon as my dad called me, so they knew the kids were at my house with a sub. and my daughter. So, yes, they have known for a couple of weeks.
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daycare 03:41 PM 01-30-2013
Originally Posted by Msdunny:
Yes, all my parents are aware. We knew that my mother only a couple of weeks to live, so I had informed them of what would happen if there were any emergencies and I had to leave. I texted them as soon as my dad called me, so they knew the kids were at my house with a sub. and my daughter. So, yes, they have known for a couple of weeks.

glad that they are aware and hopefully can be understanding.

I would just tell the mom that they kids are going great and then let her know what you are working on....This way she does not think that you are not..

I know for some people they feel they need to see proof,which usually translates to paperwork sheets....
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lovemykidstoo 03:48 PM 01-30-2013
I would do like others said and ask her what her concern is.

I am so very sorry about your mom. I lost both my mom and my mil in 1998, so I can relate. I would also remind her that you just lost your mom. What is wrong with her?

I don't know what some parents expect when we have kids of all ages. Most of them can't handle the one they have, but yet we're supposed to do it all.

I had one today ask if we were still learning sign language. Her son will be 2 next month. I'm thinking that he needs to start learning how to talk. The boy doesn't speak but maybe 10 words IF that. Does anyone here teach sign language? I felt like saying, no I don't teach sign language, I teach them to talk.
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Thetotspot 06:08 PM 01-30-2013
When i first opened, my first two full timers just over a year old ...parents said they are working on baby sign language. I thought they were crazy...didnt think it was possible. Then i had a one year old tell me she was all done. So i started helping the parents. And these kids sign and talk. These two kids are extremely advanced for their age. So we work on sign language. We sing songs and try and sign them. We talk and sign together. And its a huge learning experience for me too. So i love it. We also work on phonics and when we si g the whole alphabet in my mouth...one of the now 18 month olds sings along. Its amazi g. But we also do lots of playing...because we all know...though the parents may not...social skills are THE most important skills for kindergarten readiness regardless of kindergarten teachers expectations. So we work on days of the week and letters of the week. Matching letters...and art to go along with our letters...worrying more about process than product. We also do open ended process only art where kids can squeeze and paint and feel nd smear and all that fun stuff. But i run a daycare, not a preschool. I feel parents should be happy their kids are not set in front of a tv all day like most daycares in our area. That in itself should be enough. But yes...we do sign language.

To op...i agree...just say she is doing well and ask if she has any concerns. If i have a parent that has concerns i will add a bit more focus in that area as long as it is age appropriate...otherwise ill just explain why it shouldnt be expected at such and such an age. Keep it simple. Also sorry for your loss. (((hugs)))
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lovemykidstoo 06:38 PM 01-30-2013
Originally Posted by Thetotspot:
When i first opened, my first two full timers just over a year old ...parents said they are working on baby sign language. I thought they were crazy...didnt think it was possible. Then i had a one year old tell me she was all done. So i started helping the parents. And these kids sign and talk. These two kids are extremely advanced for their age. So we work on sign language. We sing songs and try and sign them. We talk and sign together. And its a huge learning experience for me too. So i love it. We also work on phonics and when we si g the whole alphabet in my mouth...one of the now 18 month olds sings along. Its amazi g. But we also do lots of playing...because we all know...though the parents may not...social skills are THE most important skills for kindergarten readiness regardless of kindergarten teachers expectations. So we work on days of the week and letters of the week. Matching letters...and art to go along with our letters...worrying more about process than product. We also do open ended process only art where kids can squeeze and paint and feel nd smear and all that fun stuff. But i run a daycare, not a preschool. I feel parents should be happy their kids are not set in front of a tv all day like most daycares in our area. That in itself should be enough. But yes...we do sign language.

To op...i agree...just say she is doing well and ask if she has any concerns. If i have a parent that has concerns i will add a bit more focus in that area as long as it is age appropriate...otherwise ill just explain why it shouldnt be expected at such and such an age. Keep it simple. Also sorry for your loss. (((hugs)))
I definately don't want to hijack this thread, but I should have made myself more clear. I don't have a problem with sign language I should have said as long as they are promoting speaking also. This family has a pacifier in that childs mouth the moment they come and the moment they leave. He is nearly 2 like I said. If he doesn't have it all day, he does not need it at 5:00. Let him have it out of his mouth so his language can develop. That's what irritates me that she's all worried about him signing, but not at all worried that he is almost 2 and barely speaking. Sorry OP!!
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Sunchimes 06:42 PM 01-30-2013
I did sign language when my dck were small and I'm starting again with the baby. I loved it. I backed down some when dcg became so verbal, but she still uses signs now and then.

I had a little girl who started with me at 10 months and stayed until she was about 18 or 19 months old. I keep her now and then in an emergency. She was here in August and again this week. She was the last pick up, and we were sitting on the front porch at dusk, watching cars go by. The birds were settling for the night, making quite a ruckus. I had her listen and I talked about the birds a second. When I looked at her, she was making the bird sign. I know they don't do it at home and I was very pleased that she remembered.
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lovemykidstoo 07:09 PM 01-30-2013
Originally Posted by Sunchimes:
I did sign language when my dck were small and I'm starting again with the baby. I loved it. I backed down some when dcg became so verbal, but she still uses signs now and then.

I had a little girl who started with me at 10 months and stayed until she was about 18 or 19 months old. I keep her now and then in an emergency. She was here in August and again this week. She was the last pick up, and we were sitting on the front porch at dusk, watching cars go by. The birds were settling for the night, making quite a ruckus. I had her listen and I talked about the birds a second. When I looked at her, she was making the bird sign. I know they don't do it at home and I was very pleased that she remembered.
That sounds like such a nice moment between the two of you!
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Msdunny 07:14 PM 01-30-2013
The younger DCB in this family and I sat by the window this afternoon for about an hour watching the wind blow the clouds by overhead. He loves to talk...and talk and talk! We talked about where the clouds were going, where the sun was, and whatever else he brought up. To me, that time was much more of a learning experience than any worksheet! . That is why I do this - I want to make memories with these kids, to make any time away from their parents ok and special, and maybe along the way teach them a few colors or shapes or letters. But that is difficult to translate to a parent, I know.
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lovemykidstoo 07:18 PM 01-30-2013
Originally Posted by Msdunny:
The younger DCB in this family and I sat by the window this afternoon for about an hour watching the wind blow the clouds by overhead. He loves to talk...and talk and talk! We talked about where the clouds were going, where the sun was, and whatever else he brought up. To me, that time was much more of a learning experience than any worksheet! . That is why I do this - I want to make memories with these kids, to make any time away from their parents ok and special, and maybe along the way teach them a few colors or shapes or letters. But that is difficult to translate to a parent, I know.
If I was this childs parent, I would absolutely love that you did that with my son. That sounds so nice.
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Thetotspot 07:26 PM 01-30-2013
Lovemykidstoo...i abhore binkies other than for sleeping. My son was a blanket sucker and was so hard to break him of that...he didnt talk at all...not a word...until he was three. He started daycare when i went back to work and he finally started talking. Im dead sure they just took the blanket at the door...in fact i just stopped bringing it at all pretty quickly...seizing the opportunity of a new setting maybe helping assist the change. He talked so late that he word stops very badly. He is five and this is something that should stop by age 3 which isnthe age hebstarted talking. He uses a speech therapist now and is making progress thank goodness. So yeah...walking around with things in our mouth all day...totally agree it should be broke. And i do require the kids to...in some way...use their words.

To pp...i love the way you work with your daycare kids. Learning based on what the childnis interested in. I would also love if a provider treated my children like that. You are all so amazing.
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lovemykidstoo 07:36 PM 01-30-2013
Originally Posted by Thetotspot:
Lovemykidstoo...i abhore binkies other than for sleeping. My son was a blanket sucker and was so hard to break him of that...he didnt talk at all...not a word...until he was three. He started daycare when i went back to work and he finally started talking. Im dead sure they just took the blanket at the door...in fact i just stopped bringing it at all pretty quickly...seizing the opportunity of a new setting maybe helping assist the change. He talked so late that he word stops very badly. He is five and this is something that should stop by age 3 which isnthe age hebstarted talking. He uses a speech therapist now and is making progress thank goodness. So yeah...walking around with things in our mouth all day...totally agree it should be broke. And i do require the kids to...in some way...use their words.

To pp...i love the way you work with your daycare kids. Learning based on what the childnis interested in. I would also love if a provider treated my children like that. You are all so amazing.
That's exactly what I do, I have all the blankies and pacifiers at the door and I have no problem if they have them at naptime, but I don't think they need them all day. I don't think that's good for their development. Not 1 of them gives me any problem with it either. It's not a struggle. I try to engage them in conversation constantly trying to get them more verbal, but I think that since they put it in their mouths as soon as mom or dad walk in, I'm quite sure they use it alot at home. I have 2 kids that are like this.

I love that Msdunny does this type of bonding and sharing with the children. I do that too and I just love it. We had an inside picnic today and we all just sat there and ate lunch and talked and it was so nice.
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Starburst 11:24 PM 01-30-2013
This might of been her way of asking if her kids look like they are at the right developmental milestones for their age like being able to use scissors or participate in social activities or if their is anything they need to work on.
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Msdunny 09:25 AM 01-31-2013
Originally Posted by Starburst:
This might of been her way of asking if her kids look like they are at the right developmental milestones for their age like being able to use scissors or participate in social activities or if their is anything they need to work on.
I think you are probably right, Starburst. I let her know this morning that her DD is working hard on her Kindy skills, and that we do lots if things that won't be sent home but that are still skill builders. Thanks for the reassurance, everyone!
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