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Tiffany 04:21 PM 06-28-2013
I have a family that just started Monday, June 24th. The girl is 8, very easy going and sweet. The problem is DCM...
My husband used to work with her before she was fired for stealing from clients and co-workers. She is getting on State Child Care Assistance, told me before they signed up that they would have the approval by the start of care which was the twenty fourth. I said no problem, as long as I can call and confirm by the end of business on Monday she wouldn’t have to pay out of pocket.
As of today, they still have no authorization though it is not totally their fault for this. I told them that they would not be able to start as full-time until I get the authorization, also they would have to pay as drop-in at pick up because DCM says she can’t pay for a full-time slot which is $600.00.
DCM’s boyfriend has been paying out of pocket for the drop-in at pickup. He told me Thursday that he pays for all of DCM’s bills, after he said that he told me that when I call CCA not to tell them that… Her BF also told me that he is a private contractor and his income fluctuates, also he was wanting to pay for the summer up front because “They spend all their money really quickly and they don’t want to have to worry about spending the money that was for the daycare bill.”
I was told that they would come by at 7:15am (I open at 7:30am) so we can make sure that they have everything to start care that day. I said that would be fine and was a must. They didn’t come until 9:20am, no phone call to tell me that they would be running late. DCM’s boyfriend dropped off the 8 yr old, handed me the packet with all the documents that they were told I needed before care could begin, said he was in a hurry to get to a job and left saying that if I needed anything, or if anything happened to call him because DCM didn’t have a phone.
I was not happy with this as you could imagine. The girl then tells me that she was hungry and didn’t get breakfast, my breakfast ends at 9:00am, but I wasn’t going to make her wait until Lunch at noon to eat, so I get her something to eat and sit down to look through the forms.
The first thing I notice is no shot records. I had been very specific about that she couldn’t come to daycare without them. I pick up my cell and get ready to call boyfriend and no sooner did I push the first number the girl pukes all over my floor. She hadn’t even been at daycare more than 30mins…
I send the girl home and tell the BF that I needed shot records by the close of business (5:30pm). I also made to tell BF that she also couldn’t come back until she was vomit free for 24hrs. I get a call later that night from DCM saying that 8yr old was fine now and hadn’t thrown up since doing so at daycare and asked if she could come Tuesday at 10am.
I said yes, as long as I had shot records. I also tell DCM that she might want to look over my Ill Child Policies again. At 10:30pm Monday night I get a second call from DCM telling me that the child puked again and would be straying home Tuesday.
Wednesday BF drops off the child and says that she is doing better. I ask for shot records as he’s trying to high tail it out the door, I am told that he didn’t have them and that DCM had them, but he would bring them at pickup. He tells me this as he’s getting in his truck… I do finally get the shot records at pick up.
Thursday goes great, all the kids love the new girl and she is a great kid. Friday goes good until the girl tells me that she has a disease on her feet… I had noticed what I had thought was dirt on the bottoms of her feet Monday, but didn’t really pay it any mind, thinking she just had dirty feet like most kids do during the summer and had her wipe them down with a wet towel...
Anyway, I really look this time and it was definitely NOT just dirt. It looks like the severe case of Athletes foot that my brother had a few years back… So I have her put socks on and at pickup I ask BF about it, the first thing he says it that it’s not contagious and she puts lotion on it at night. I notice that he is purposefully not saying what 'it' is, and I’m not sure if it’s because he just doesn’t know or if he does and just doesn’t want to tell me. So I once again bring up my Ill Child Policies and tell him to let DCM know that I’ll need a doctor’s note saying what ‘it’ is and that it’s not contagious.
I have not spoken to DCM since the phone call Monday night, I have tried to call her but the number I have for her goes to voicemail, which is full.
The girl is great, the other kids in care love her, and she is very helpful and if they are going to actual pay up front for the whole summer like BF said that would be great. But then my gut is telling me to tell them to find care somewhere else…
What do you think? Should I go ahead and terminate care or give them another week and see how it goes?
My husband used to work with her before she was fired for stealing from clients and co-workers. She is getting on State Child Care Assistance, told me before they signed up that they would have the approval by the start of care which was the twenty fourth. I said no problem, as long as I can call and confirm by the end of business on Monday she wouldn’t have to pay out of pocket.
As of today, they still have no authorization though it is not totally their fault for this. I told them that they would not be able to start as full-time until I get the authorization, also they would have to pay as drop-in at pick up because DCM says she can’t pay for a full-time slot which is $600.00.
DCM’s boyfriend has been paying out of pocket for the drop-in at pickup. He told me Thursday that he pays for all of DCM’s bills, after he said that he told me that when I call CCA not to tell them that… Her BF also told me that he is a private contractor and his income fluctuates, also he was wanting to pay for the summer up front because “They spend all their money really quickly and they don’t want to have to worry about spending the money that was for the daycare bill.”
I was told that they would come by at 7:15am (I open at 7:30am) so we can make sure that they have everything to start care that day. I said that would be fine and was a must. They didn’t come until 9:20am, no phone call to tell me that they would be running late. DCM’s boyfriend dropped off the 8 yr old, handed me the packet with all the documents that they were told I needed before care could begin, said he was in a hurry to get to a job and left saying that if I needed anything, or if anything happened to call him because DCM didn’t have a phone.
I was not happy with this as you could imagine. The girl then tells me that she was hungry and didn’t get breakfast, my breakfast ends at 9:00am, but I wasn’t going to make her wait until Lunch at noon to eat, so I get her something to eat and sit down to look through the forms.
The first thing I notice is no shot records. I had been very specific about that she couldn’t come to daycare without them. I pick up my cell and get ready to call boyfriend and no sooner did I push the first number the girl pukes all over my floor. She hadn’t even been at daycare more than 30mins…
I send the girl home and tell the BF that I needed shot records by the close of business (5:30pm). I also made to tell BF that she also couldn’t come back until she was vomit free for 24hrs. I get a call later that night from DCM saying that 8yr old was fine now and hadn’t thrown up since doing so at daycare and asked if she could come Tuesday at 10am.
I said yes, as long as I had shot records. I also tell DCM that she might want to look over my Ill Child Policies again. At 10:30pm Monday night I get a second call from DCM telling me that the child puked again and would be straying home Tuesday.
Wednesday BF drops off the child and says that she is doing better. I ask for shot records as he’s trying to high tail it out the door, I am told that he didn’t have them and that DCM had them, but he would bring them at pickup. He tells me this as he’s getting in his truck… I do finally get the shot records at pick up.
Thursday goes great, all the kids love the new girl and she is a great kid. Friday goes good until the girl tells me that she has a disease on her feet… I had noticed what I had thought was dirt on the bottoms of her feet Monday, but didn’t really pay it any mind, thinking she just had dirty feet like most kids do during the summer and had her wipe them down with a wet towel...
Anyway, I really look this time and it was definitely NOT just dirt. It looks like the severe case of Athletes foot that my brother had a few years back… So I have her put socks on and at pickup I ask BF about it, the first thing he says it that it’s not contagious and she puts lotion on it at night. I notice that he is purposefully not saying what 'it' is, and I’m not sure if it’s because he just doesn’t know or if he does and just doesn’t want to tell me. So I once again bring up my Ill Child Policies and tell him to let DCM know that I’ll need a doctor’s note saying what ‘it’ is and that it’s not contagious.
I have not spoken to DCM since the phone call Monday night, I have tried to call her but the number I have for her goes to voicemail, which is full.
The girl is great, the other kids in care love her, and she is very helpful and if they are going to actual pay up front for the whole summer like BF said that would be great. But then my gut is telling me to tell them to find care somewhere else…
What do you think? Should I go ahead and terminate care or give them another week and see how it goes?
Michael 11:10 PM 06-28-2013
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DaycareMom2012 01:45 AM 06-29-2013
I would defiantly term b4 you get too far along and feel bad about it. I am not one of those who likes to term bc I have no backbone, but if I were dealing with this from the beginning I would go ahead and let them go. They seem very irresponsible! First of all being fired for stealing from her workplace! Not being open and honest about the child's situations and the shot record. I once had a family that did not bring their paperwork or shot record for a month!! The parents were split up dcm was with another guy who had his own kids and eventually started bringing his own 2.5yo son and it was the same thing no paper work forever. I eventually had to get the dad of the first kid to fill it out them finally got SR from dcm. And what do you know this family did not come back after Xmas. She told me she would come back Jan 14th bc that is when her son went back to school, but I knew it was bc her bf was an instructor at a local technical college and was off until then so they were going to keep kids home until then so they didn't have to pay which was not okay bc they never told me this b4 hand so I could prepare so I told her she still needed to pay for those weeks, never heard from her since. Went all that time not filling my spot just to see if they'd come back, but of course not. They were always late paying and a few other problems. The first boys dad mentioned to me one time the kid had been in 3 daycares that year bc she tends not to pay. Also I never saw dcm the whole time they were here, her bf ALWAYS picked them up. I wish I would've just termed them from the beginning. It would've saved me a lot of time of going with out my much needed finances and filled the spot to much more responsible people. Besides the SR is very important to have for state.
Heidi 05:16 AM 06-29-2013
In our state, we aren't required to get shot records for school-agers, because the schools handle that. weird, eh? There is also an online data base where parents can print out their shot records. Also, the school should have a copy anyway, so if there is anyone at school, she can just call them and ask.
If you keep this kiddo, you are doing in out of kindness to her. Also, I would keep an real close eye on how much she scratches her head. If they don't care about contagious foot fungi or puking, they probably wouldn't notice or mention lice...
Do a head check (just do everyone so she's not singled out). Some kids have sucky lives...sad
If you keep this kiddo, you are doing in out of kindness to her. Also, I would keep an real close eye on how much she scratches her head. If they don't care about contagious foot fungi or puking, they probably wouldn't notice or mention lice...
Do a head check (just do everyone so she's not singled out). Some kids have sucky lives...sad
daycare 06:54 AM 06-29-2013
some may not agree wit me, but this is what I would do.
First off, I never start anyone without first going over all the rules, have their entire list of necessary documents (all paper work) and supplies needed for their child to attend. I usually do this the day before they start. PLUS payment. I deposit that check right away so that first thing the next day I know if it cleared my account or not. Of course cash is always great. If the payment clears on their start date great. IF not (which has never happened) then you refuse care right there. NO pay, NO stay.
If this were my family, I would require both of them to have a sit down meeting with me. I would call DCM and tell her and would tell the BF at pick up. Let them know that it is a required meeting and that if they can't make the meeting you can't continue to offer care. I am sure there are people on here would could help you to arrange the meeting or a letter to inform them of the meeting. I always like to send emails, BUT email is 90% of my communication with the parents. When I send important emails, I will normally follow up at pick up asking the parent, did you receive my email?
In the meeting you need to go over all of your rules. Print them out, have them sign off on them. Let them know that their DCG is a great fit to your program and you really enjoy her here, but she needs to be well in order to do so. Go over anything that you feel is important that they need to know moving forward. Also, I would be putting them on a 30-day probation period from that day forward. I would not tell them this, but I would mark it on my own calendar and if you don't see improvement then you can say, hey I did everything I could to help, term the family and part ways.
I have a very weak backbone, so it is hard for me to put my foot down. BUT what happens there is that everyone mistaken my niceness as weakness and they walk all over me. OF course I mind and it bothers me so much. BUT unless you do something about it, it will keep on going and going. YOu need to get in the drivers seat and take over.
I know that I have had a few new families that were breaking a lot of rules, EVEN after we went over them before starting or doing things that upset me. It took me speaking up and telling them. I know some families just don't understand home daycare, some really did forget, and some just don't care.
I love children, and I am a sucker for them. I know a lot of us are, which make it hard to do our job. It's hard to put a game face on when our emotions get involved.
You may be the only sense of normal this child gets. If I were in your shoes, I would want to try to help them before I threw in the towel. by this is just me...
First off, I never start anyone without first going over all the rules, have their entire list of necessary documents (all paper work) and supplies needed for their child to attend. I usually do this the day before they start. PLUS payment. I deposit that check right away so that first thing the next day I know if it cleared my account or not. Of course cash is always great. If the payment clears on their start date great. IF not (which has never happened) then you refuse care right there. NO pay, NO stay.
If this were my family, I would require both of them to have a sit down meeting with me. I would call DCM and tell her and would tell the BF at pick up. Let them know that it is a required meeting and that if they can't make the meeting you can't continue to offer care. I am sure there are people on here would could help you to arrange the meeting or a letter to inform them of the meeting. I always like to send emails, BUT email is 90% of my communication with the parents. When I send important emails, I will normally follow up at pick up asking the parent, did you receive my email?
In the meeting you need to go over all of your rules. Print them out, have them sign off on them. Let them know that their DCG is a great fit to your program and you really enjoy her here, but she needs to be well in order to do so. Go over anything that you feel is important that they need to know moving forward. Also, I would be putting them on a 30-day probation period from that day forward. I would not tell them this, but I would mark it on my own calendar and if you don't see improvement then you can say, hey I did everything I could to help, term the family and part ways.
I have a very weak backbone, so it is hard for me to put my foot down. BUT what happens there is that everyone mistaken my niceness as weakness and they walk all over me. OF course I mind and it bothers me so much. BUT unless you do something about it, it will keep on going and going. YOu need to get in the drivers seat and take over.
I know that I have had a few new families that were breaking a lot of rules, EVEN after we went over them before starting or doing things that upset me. It took me speaking up and telling them. I know some families just don't understand home daycare, some really did forget, and some just don't care.
I love children, and I am a sucker for them. I know a lot of us are, which make it hard to do our job. It's hard to put a game face on when our emotions get involved.
You may be the only sense of normal this child gets. If I were in your shoes, I would want to try to help them before I threw in the towel. by this is just me...
julie 07:00 AM 06-29-2013
I'm sorry to say it, but if this has been your first week with them and your husband already has a history of this mom and criminal activity, then I would just say you have thought about it, and this isn't working out. It's hard for a kid like that and I feel for her, but this will only get worse for you. I would look out for you and your family in this situation. This family will cause you nothing but stress.
EntropyControlSpecialist 02:49 PM 06-29-2013
Originally Posted by julie:
I'm sorry to say it, but if this has been your first week with them and your husband already has a history of this mom and criminal activity, then I would just say you have thought about it, and this isn't working out. It's hard for a kid like that and I feel for her, but this will only get worse for you. I would look out for you and your family in this situation. This family will cause you nothing but stress.
Yes. Exactly this.I'm sorry to say it, but if this has been your first week with them and your husband already has a history of this mom and criminal activity, then I would just say you have thought about it, and this isn't working out. It's hard for a kid like that and I feel for her, but this will only get worse for you. I would look out for you and your family in this situation. This family will cause you nothing but stress.
I actually have been there done that. I just termed a family quite similar to this and it got worse as time progressed. After a discussion, it would BRIEFLY get better but then would return to the same old same old. I dealt with it for 15 months before I terminated them and I should have done so much sooner. But, I really LOVED the children.