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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Potty Learning Help!!
Misslexi 05:58 PM 04-18-2019
So I have a 3 year old boy who recently went through potty training at home over the weekend two weeks ago. I only have him Wed, Thurs, and Fri. Mom says he pees on the training potty at home but wont have a bowel movement on the potty. She told me he had a BM in his underwear so she put a diaper back on him. I told her I didnt want to confuse him by going back and forth with undies and diapers and asked her to bring in a couple extra pairs of undies and that I dont mind if he has accidents, that's how he'll learn. Several times now he has come in in either a pull up or diaper and I tell mom I'll change him into his underwear, which I only have leftover from washing the ones he's had accidents in. Still no undies have been brought in to keep on hand. He has no problem sitting on the potty but he will hold his pee in and not actually use the potty. I know this because we will spend almost ten minutes sitting on the potty reading books, playing, etc. Then he will get up and go hide in a corner to pee in his underwear. I'm at a loss of what to do. I should also add that this boy has some challenging behaviors that I'm starting to think derive from being extremely overtired. Any advice? I know I should get mom on the same page, but just looking at if there's anything I can do to help while he's with me. Thanks!
Michael 01:37 AM 04-19-2019
I put a couple extra tags at the bottom. Maybe these threads will help:
Indoorvoice 08:46 AM 04-19-2019
I think it's clear that mom is not that interested in potty training him anymore and I would follow her lead and put him back in diapers. It's not your job to do the leg work, especially since he is only with you 3 days. If he is having several accidents, it sounds like he is not quite ready yet and that's ok!
storybookending 09:12 AM 04-19-2019
He doesn’t seem ready to me and I would go with mom and just put him back in pull ups or diapers. You shouldn’t have to spend +10 minutes “sitting and playing” on the potty if the child was truly trained. Usually providers have the opposite problem.
mommyneedsadayoff 10:47 AM 04-19-2019
If he was truly "potty trained", wearing underwear or diapers wouldn't make any difference. It's not confusing. He is not ready and I would put them back in diapers or pull up until he is able to handle it.
ColorfulSunburst 11:59 AM 04-19-2019
never ever allow to kids play and read while sitting on potty. A couple of minutes sitting on potty - it is the max I allow. Done nothing? Free to go, but I keep my eyes on that child. If (s)he tries to hide somewhere I send the child back to potty.
ColorfulSunburst 12:08 PM 04-19-2019
Originally Posted by mommyneedsadayoff:
If he was truly "potty trained", wearing underwear or diapers wouldn't make any difference. It's not confusing. He is not ready and I would put them back in diapers or pull up until he is able to handle it.
when a child wearing diapers or pull-ups during potty training it confuses a child a lot. Of course, it happens not because of a diaper. It happens because of adult reactions. If a child wears underwear, adults do everything to avoid an accident. If a child wears diapers, most adults always find something more important to do then assists with a potty.
Yes, if a child is completely potty-trained, it doesn't matter what (s)he wears.
Mom2Two 12:25 PM 04-19-2019
I don't potty train dck. If a child is still BMing not in potty, I would ask for diapers at my place, because even pull ups are hard to change with a mushy BM in them.

I charge a fee for underwear accidents.

I don't take kids potty unless they are ready for pull ups and when I take them, they need to actually be peeing, or it's not a good use of my time to be taking them. I also try to only take those kids about every two hours. So if they can't stay dry two hours, I don't really try too hard to keep them dry.

The downside to all this, is that my dck usually end up potty trained at a little bit older age than some providers would wish. But I'm okay with that.

So based on my preferences, I would be telling mom to bring in diapers. But many providers do things differently than me.
ColorfulSunburst 12:43 PM 04-19-2019
I potty-train DC kids. Right now one 19mo boy is in a process. Most of my DC kids are potty-trained around 2yo.
Tags:potty, potty accidents, potty issues, potty training, won't go potty
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