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melodyfire 07:27 PM 10-09-2013
First time posting, long time reader. You guys have helped me out alot! However, right now I need a really good vent and some advice on my next moves.

I am a recently graduated music education major, but my love has always been small children. That is why I went for a degree using the two things I love: music and children. This job at the daycare I'm at right now (lets call it Happy Time Daycare since I don't want this coming back at me... you will see why in a second) is the first one I have been on payroll at. Other daycares I volunteered at or did it for cash (like at the church I taught at for so long). I have to say, I love the children and my coworkers so very much, but the boss and her boyfriend is incredibly shady. I have been here for less than a year so I do not feel as though I have any authority to say anything to anyone. Here's the rant and concerns:

1. The bosses boyfriend.
I have noticed this is a common trend for the boss to let her boyfriend take over by reading on this forum frequently. I wonder why that happens. My boss was a very nice woman that always put her employees and the children first. She knew she made enough money from tuition to keep everyone happy and everything in working order. Not so much anymore now that her boyfriend has stepped in. He spends several hours a day sitting in front of the TV's downstairs the cameras go to and writes down everything every employee does wrong. Even if it is as small as "you got the kids out of bed at 3:45 instead of 3:30" you get grilled for it. And I mean he drags you to another room to yell at you. He also comes in during naptime to do any construction work and wakes the kids up, then plays with them. Even if there is an hour left of naptime, he will get them up then we have to deal with the unnecessary cranky kids. My coworkers and I have asked him to wait until after naptime to do work, but it never happens. We're pretty sure he checks us on Facebook and anywhere we go online in our private time because he asks about things noone has told him.

2. Holiday Pay? Yes and No.
At first, we were all told that we would get paid for Labor Day. She is just implementing holiday pay so all of us coworkers we excited. Ask her again later and only full time employees were getting paid. Ask again later, and only employees who worked full weeks before and after the holiday got the holiday pay. The paycheck was today and NOONE was paid for the holiday. Apparently she changed her mind (again) and now to get paid you have to have a certain amount of training each month (that we have to pay for) to get holiday pay. I can get behind any rule for pay, as long as it is decided on and followed. This going back and forth is driving me crazy.

3. Son lives in the building...
This just seems highly unprofessional to me. She 23 year old son lives in the basement of the daycare and comes and goes as he pleases. There have been times we were punished for leaving the door unlocked when we were absolutely sure we have locked it the day before. We have smelled pot coming from downstairs (we have CHILDREN in the building!!!!) and beer cans in the playground outside. These parents are paying over $1000/mo and this just seems like that money could be spent better somewhere else.

4. Where are the bagels from?
We have bagels. Lots and lots of bagels. There are mountains of bagels frozen int he freezer downstairs. Anytime we ask for food for the kids we are deferred to this bagel freezer until she fits it in her schedule to go shopping, which could be weeks later. She says these bagels are day old bagels from the place down the street, but she brings them in garbage bags. I am not sure if she bought them from this place or if she dug them out of the trash can. I want to believe she bought them but wouldn't a business put anything you bought from them in nicer bags and not giant trash bags? She freezes these bagels for months. In fact, we were just given a bag with a date from LAST YEAR on it. Day old frozen bagels frozen for a year just doesn't sound like a nice snack for small children. We usually throw these out and sometimes buy extra food on our lunch to feed the kids something that not hard as a rock.

So that is my rant. Sorry it is so long and I do feel pretty bad about starting my time here on an unhappy note. You people are so nice and helpful I just needed to tell you my concerns about this place and ask for help. I have no idea what my next move should be. I love these kids like crazy and if I fin a new job then I feel like I am leaving them in an unhappy environment. Everyone employee is doing their best to not let these things effect their jobs, but you know somedays it just happens. Are there any options for me, or should I just move on? I really do not want to leave these kids. Thank you everyone!
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butterfly 07:33 PM 10-09-2013


I would move on. It's not worth the mental exhaustion from having to deal with these issues that will probably never change. Find a new, better, more fullfilling job. Or start your own daycare.

And welcome to the forum.
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KidGrind 08:03 PM 10-09-2013
I think you should file a report with the licensing body. Look for other employment options and hope the children you love have an opportunity to go to a different facility.
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Maria2013 05:17 AM 10-10-2013
Based on what you wrote, this person is not suited to care for children and should not be allowed to keep the business
I would file a report with licensing and then move on

someone mentioned "starting your own Daycare" why don't you consider that?

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daycarediva 05:34 AM 10-10-2013
1. Call and file an anonymous complaint with licensing.

2. Start your own home day care and QUIT!
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Shell 07:08 AM 10-10-2013
I wouldn't stay there a minute longer - this is not a good situation. There are so many things that could go wrong for you and could potentially damage your career /reputation. Get out asap!
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Maria2013 10:05 AM 10-10-2013
Originally Posted by mrsmichelle:
I wouldn't stay there a minute longer - this is not a good situation. There are so many things that could go wrong for you and could potentially damage your career /reputation. Get out asap!


I agree 100%
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Sugar Magnolia 10:06 AM 10-10-2013
I would be taking photographs. Beer cans in the playground? Snap. Old bagels? Snap. Unlocked basement door? Snap. Boss's boyfriend yelling? Recording. Smell weed? That one......."hey boss, I smell weed. Fix that immediately or I will call the police this very second."
Then quit.
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preschoolteacher 10:28 AM 10-10-2013
You ALWAYS have the authority to say something. Please take this gently because I'm not trying to sound rude... but your opinion that since you've been there less than a year, you don't think you have the right to say something... that way of thinking is dangerous. You are worth it and should be able to speak up for yourself. The children are worth it, too. Frankly, it is your responsibility to speak up for them.

This daycare sounds like a horrible place to work AND a horrible place to be a child. I used to work in Human Resources, and the way they are treating their employees is so unprofessional. I wouldn't put up with that.

I would report her to CPS. The kids are in an unhealthy environment... not being able to nap... pot smoking son downstairs... unhealthy food being served...

But I have to admit that the bagel part of your post made me laugh out loud because of how ridiculous it is. Seriously, it is so crazy!! She must have a friend who drives the Bruegger's Bagels delivery truck or something...
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ShyMommy 10:44 AM 10-10-2013
Originally Posted by melodyfire:

4. Where are the bagels from?
We have bagels. Lots and lots of bagels. There are mountains of bagels frozen int he freezer downstairs. Anytime we ask for food for the kids we are deferred to this bagel freezer until she fits it in her schedule to go shopping, which could be weeks later. She says these bagels are day old bagels from the place down the street, but she brings them in garbage bags. I am not sure if she bought them from this place or if she dug them out of the trash can. I want to believe she bought them but wouldn't a business put anything you bought from them in nicer bags and not giant trash bags? She freezes these bagels for months. In fact, we were just given a bag with a date from LAST YEAR on it. Day old frozen bagels frozen for a year just doesn't sound like a nice snack for small children. We usually throw these out and sometimes buy extra food on our lunch to feed the kids something that not hard as a rock.
I gigglesnorted. "Bagel freezer" really did me in.

But seriously, you need to report this to licensing. Imagine all those parents who think they're sending their kids to a safe environment everyday.

Year old bagels? Doesn't sound so safe to me. I can only imagine what else is slipping through.

Please report this and move on, not just for the children and their parents but for yourself.
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Hunni Bee 10:45 AM 10-10-2013
This sounds sooo much like my old job.

People living on the premises, random rules that change to fit her purposes, weird questionable food, not being able to confirm whose in charge, not having proper supplies...

Please do a favor to yourself and GET OUT. I stayed for five years and I was so stressed, this forum will help you get away. When something terrible happens, and it will, you will go down with the ship.

Definitely call licensing.
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Sugar Magnolia 10:46 AM 10-10-2013
Also,.sounds to me like a "hostile work environment" to me. Lawsuit material, IMO.
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Hunni Bee 10:51 AM 10-10-2013
Originally Posted by preschoolteacher:
You ALWAYS have the authority to say something. Please take this gently because I'm not trying to sound rude... but your opinion that since you've been there less than a year, you don't think you have the right to say something... that way of thinking is dangerous. You are worth it and should be able to speak up for yourself. The children are worth it, too. Frankly, it is your responsibility to speak up for them.

This daycare sounds like a horrible place to work AND a horrible place to be a child. I used to work in Human Resources, and the way they are treating their employees is so unprofessional. I wouldn't put up with that.

I would report her to CPS. The kids are in an unhealthy environment... not being able to nap... pot smoking son downstairs... unhealthy food being served...

But I have to admit that the bagel part of your post made me laugh out loud because of how ridiculous it is. Seriously, it is so crazy!! She must have a friend who drives the Bruegger's Bagels delivery truck or something...
My SO works for Panera, and they bag the unsold bagels up at the end of the day and give them to churches, places that feed the homeless, etc. She either is perpetrating as a non-profit or she has a friend who works there who is passing them off to her.

What a creep.
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Unregistered 10:53 AM 10-10-2013
Thanks for all of the responses. I have some pictures on my phone of these infractions. I have brought my resume back out and started sending it out this morning since it is my day off.

Something else happened this morning while I was eating my breakfast. I received a text from my boss saying she made a mistake on my paycheck and I need to pay her back. I wasn't aware of this mistake since my paystub is at work and I have direct deposit. I haven't responded, and I have no idea how. As far as I know I have to pay her back but I'm getting real tired of this.

Anyone in Denver, CO hiring a music teacher? lol
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melodyfire 10:55 AM 10-10-2013
Sorry that was me... didn't know I wasn't logged in! Still getting used to it you know?
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Hunni Bee 10:58 AM 10-10-2013
Originally Posted by Unregistered:
Thanks for all of the responses. I have some pictures on my phone of these infractions. I have brought my resume back out and started sending it out this morning since it is my day off.

Something else happened this morning while I was eating my breakfast. I received a text from my boss saying she made a mistake on my paycheck and I need to pay her back. I wasn't aware of this mistake since my paystub is at work and I have direct deposit. I haven't responded, and I have no idea how. As far as I know I have to pay her back but I'm getting real tired of this.

Anyone in Denver, CO hiring a music teacher? lol
Please make her sit down with you and show you where the mistake was made. Have her have a copy of your timesheet and paystub with her so you compare your hours.

Refuse to pay her back until she does.

This sounds like BS.
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melilley 11:10 AM 10-10-2013
Get out now! And report her! I wouldn't want my kids to go there. You are the only one who can help the children, the parents obviously don't know the things that are going on, you need to be their advocate. Hopefully if you report her, licensing will come out and shut her down! And I agree with Hunni-make sure you sit down with her and make her show you the mistake with your paycheck!
Good luck!
Reply
My3cents 11:34 AM 10-10-2013
Originally Posted by melodyfire:
First time posting, long time reader. You guys have helped me out alot! However, right now I need a really good vent and some advice on my next moves.

I am a recently graduated music education major, but my love has always been small children. That is why I went for a degree using the two things I love: music and children. This job at the daycare I'm at right now (lets call it Happy Time Daycare since I don't want this coming back at me... you will see why in a second) is the first one I have been on payroll at. Other daycares I volunteered at or did it for cash (like at the church I taught at for so long). I have to say, I love the children and my coworkers so very much, but the boss and her boyfriend is incredibly shady. I have been here for less than a year so I do not feel as though I have any authority to say anything to anyone. Here's the rant and concerns:

1. The bosses boyfriend.
I have noticed this is a common trend for the boss to let her boyfriend take over by reading on this forum frequently. I wonder why that happens. My boss was a very nice woman that always put her employees and the children first. She knew she made enough money from tuition to keep everyone happy and everything in working order. Not so much anymore now that her boyfriend has stepped in. He spends several hours a day sitting in front of the TV's downstairs the cameras go to and writes down everything every employee does wrong. Even if it is as small as "you got the kids out of bed at 3:45 instead of 3:30" you get grilled for it. And I mean he drags you to another room to yell at you. He also comes in during naptime to do any construction work and wakes the kids up, then plays with them. Even if there is an hour left of naptime, he will get them up then we have to deal with the unnecessary cranky kids. My coworkers and I have asked him to wait until after naptime to do work, but it never happens. We're pretty sure he checks us on Facebook and anywhere we go online in our private time because he asks about things noone has told him.

2. Holiday Pay? Yes and No.
At first, we were all told that we would get paid for Labor Day. She is just implementing holiday pay so all of us coworkers we excited. Ask her again later and only full time employees were getting paid. Ask again later, and only employees who worked full weeks before and after the holiday got the holiday pay. The paycheck was today and NOONE was paid for the holiday. Apparently she changed her mind (again) and now to get paid you have to have a certain amount of training each month (that we have to pay for) to get holiday pay. I can get behind any rule for pay, as long as it is decided on and followed. This going back and forth is driving me crazy.

3. Son lives in the building...
This just seems highly unprofessional to me. She 23 year old son lives in the basement of the daycare and comes and goes as he pleases. There have been times we were punished for leaving the door unlocked when we were absolutely sure we have locked it the day before. We have smelled pot coming from downstairs (we have CHILDREN in the building!!!!) and beer cans in the playground outside. These parents are paying over $1000/mo and this just seems like that money could be spent better somewhere else.

4. Where are the bagels from?
We have bagels. Lots and lots of bagels. There are mountains of bagels frozen int he freezer downstairs. Anytime we ask for food for the kids we are deferred to this bagel freezer until she fits it in her schedule to go shopping, which could be weeks later. She says these bagels are day old bagels from the place down the street, but she brings them in garbage bags. I am not sure if she bought them from this place or if she dug them out of the trash can. I want to believe she bought them but wouldn't a business put anything you bought from them in nicer bags and not giant trash bags? She freezes these bagels for months. In fact, we were just given a bag with a date from LAST YEAR on it. Day old frozen bagels frozen for a year just doesn't sound like a nice snack for small children. We usually throw these out and sometimes buy extra food on our lunch to feed the kids something that not hard as a rock.

So that is my rant. Sorry it is so long and I do feel pretty bad about starting my time here on an unhappy note. You people are so nice and helpful I just needed to tell you my concerns about this place and ask for help. I have no idea what my next move should be. I love these kids like crazy and if I fin a new job then I feel like I am leaving them in an unhappy environment. Everyone employee is doing their best to not let these things effect their jobs, but you know somedays it just happens. Are there any options for me, or should I just move on? I really do not want to leave these kids. Thank you everyone!
Anyone who works with children is a mandated reporter!!! This is not right and you know it. Report it. Find a new job. know your states rules and regulations, it is your right to know these. If you love these kids you won't put up with this anymore. Tell the parents before you leave-

Good luck and do the right thing. Sorry but you just don't sound like a disgruntled employee there are legit issues here that should be addressed by licensing. Find another place to work that values you and treats you well, or open your own daycare.
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preschoolteacher 10:17 AM 10-11-2013
Run, run, run!!!! Make sure you are 100% before you pay back any money. My gosh. I can just see her trying to screw you out of what you earned. I bet they are not paying you enough as it is to work there anyway!

Please report her before you leave. Or soon after. Don't leave those kids there without helping them.
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melodyfire 01:19 PM 10-11-2013
I have 2 interviews set up at new places. My coworker is also offering to be a nanny to a brother and sister here so she is also getting out. She's a very very good teacher and she gets it worse than I do sometimes. Both of us have pictures on our phones to give to anyone in licensing that comes when I call them. I want to have another job lined up before Icould possibly lose this one.
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