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  #1  
Old 05-30-2017, 09:20 AM
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In all my 17 years of doing daycare, I have never signed on a family then have them not show up. I am so pissed right now. They seemed like nice people didn't have any bad feelings about them (only thing was they are the only people that seemed to have concern about my husband working from home but seemed to be cleared and fine after we talked). I did not take a deposit so my fault I just didn't feel I needed to. I feel like leaving her a message thanking her for wasting my time. Obviously I am thankful maybe it is a blessing in disguise.
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Old 05-30-2017, 09:24 AM
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I have. I had one parent now show for a good three months and then suddenly show on my door step with baby in tow. Had to turn away...after the shock wore off.

Sorry you have to deal with that. It is NEVER fun and ALWAYS frustrating.
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Old 05-30-2017, 09:29 AM
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I just don't understand, this lady was so concerned that I would fill her spot and called me 3 times on a saturday (I don't do business on weekends) to let me know they wanted the spot and was concerned I would offer it to someone else. Being nice I didn't want them to worry all weekend so I called her later that day and told her great I wanted to offer it to them. She thanked me and said she appreciated me calling and relieving her worry I would fill it.
I want to leave her a message but know that's probably not the "adult" think to do lol
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Old 05-30-2017, 09:31 AM
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Did you try calling? Maybe something happened then?
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Old 05-30-2017, 09:36 AM
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I thought that too, and actually they called once this morning, it rang only once, when I answered no one was there. So I waited until 8 am and called but it went to voice mail, I left a message. My husband thinks maybe they accidentally called me instead of their "new" provider.

Do you think I should call again or just wait it out.
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Old 05-30-2017, 09:42 AM
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I would call and leave a 'concerned' message or at least a text message. "I called earlier but havent heard from you. I hope everything is ok. Please call me later and let me know if Susie will be starting tomorrow. Just worried something might have happened. "

It does seem odd though they called and then hung up but who knows. Seems even more odd that they really wanted the spot and then didn't show.
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Old 05-30-2017, 09:52 AM
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Do you have any paperwork? I would totally charge them for two weeks. I HATE rude people.

Also- lesson learned, get that deposit!
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Old 05-30-2017, 09:53 AM
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I had one do this and actually, she was the reason I started requiring a deposit. Interview went great, ours kids got along, lived close by, told them about my vacations (it was about a month before one), signed contracts and thought we were good to go. Then I see the care.com ad she posts looking for care and says "if you take time off, I have to take time off and I will not do that." Yeah...well, if that was a deal breaker you should signed on Very annoying and childish. It's like really, we're all adults, these people ought to be able to at least say they had a change of plans etc. *Sigh* you probably did Dodge a bullet though and hopefully the next one will be better!
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Old 05-30-2017, 09:56 AM
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Nope no paperwork. I am to trusting. In all honesty in my 17 years of doing this I have never taken a deposit and have never been screwed. But I will for sure start doing it now. It's terrible how one person can ruin it for everyone else. I just am so angry right now I feel like calling her and thanking her for wasting my time. Putting together her file, printing extra worksheets, adding them to my June newsletter. What a waste
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Old 05-30-2017, 09:57 AM
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I had one do this and actually, she was the reason I started requiring a deposit. Interview went great, ours kids got along, lived close by, told them about my vacations (it was about a month before one), signed contracts and thought we were good to go. Then I see the care.com ad she posts looking for care and says "if you take time off, I have to take time off and I will not do that." Yeah...well, if that was a deal breaker you should signed on Very annoying and childish. It's like really, we're all adults, these people ought to be able to at least say they had a change of plans etc. *Sigh* you probably did Dodge a bullet though and hopefully the next one will be better!
I agree that it was a blessing in disguise and for that I'm thankful, better now than having to deal with it later.
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Old 05-30-2017, 10:15 AM
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Nope no paperwork. I am to trusting. In all honesty in my 17 years of doing this I have never taken a deposit and have never been screwed. But I will for sure start doing it now. It's terrible how one person can ruin it for everyone else. I just am so angry right now I feel like calling her and thanking her for wasting my time. Putting together her file, printing extra worksheets, adding them to my June newsletter. What a waste
Sorry that happened.

I require paperwork the week prior to them starting.... I like to review all the medical docs and make sure those are in order especially the vaccinations - and that takes me dedicated time still so it cannot be done with my full attention while little ones are present. I also don't want a family who is so pressed for new care they cannot wait a week to gather the supplies needed and prepare their child for coming.

Yes a deposit is needed to cover for the financial loss but also the paperwork is needed because you don't want a parent there without the emergency numbers, a child not up to date on vaccinations, etc.
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Old 05-30-2017, 10:45 AM
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I wouldn't call. I'd send a text or email saying that, since they hadn't paid or arrived at the time we'd discussed starting, I assumed they had gone a different direction and I would be interviewing to fill the space.

I would NOT put in any effort to make them show up. Definitely wouldn't want to work with this family regularly.
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Old 05-30-2017, 10:52 AM
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I would call and ask them if everything was ok, it definitely seems odd. Maybe the mom has a mental illness and this is part of it? Who knows!

If I did not hear from her I would definitely start looking for someone else. Lesson learned for sure. I have dealt with people like this too and it is always shocking to me. Showing up late for an interview, not responding to emails etc. They think good childcare grows on trees!
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Old 05-30-2017, 10:58 AM
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It is a lesson ed learned for sure. I guess I have been super lucky that this has never happened before. I have had only a few people over the years not show up for an interview which is rude but nothing like this. This lady even said are you sure you don't want a deposit I don't want you to give it to some one else and I assured her I wouldn't do that and even asked her to call me if anything changed.
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Old 05-30-2017, 11:24 AM
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It is a lesson ed learned for sure. I guess I have been super lucky that this has never happened before. I have had only a few people over the years not show up for an interview which is rude but nothing like this. This lady even said are you sure you don't want a deposit I don't want you to give it to some one else and I assured her I wouldn't do that and even asked her to call me if anything changed.
This seems so strange and not at all like a regular no show. You didn't get any red flags. I really hope everything is ok with that family. I don't know, I have a feeling something might be going on.
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Old 05-30-2017, 11:56 AM
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The only thing that concerned me at first that it could be a problem was, a couple days after the interview, after they had called and wanted the spot she had questions about my husband working from home. She wanted to know if the door was left locked during the day, and if his clients came into the home ect. I told her that the door is not left locked as he frequents coming in and out, I explained all of it very well to her, I told her his clients do not come in to the home but he does have clients throughout the day in the garage and shop, they drop off stuff and pick up stuff they do not stay extended periods. No one has ever questioned this but I get it.

She explained why she was concerned as was the reason for their change in childcare.
she said where her daughter was going when she picked up there were always a bunch of different people in the home, people she didnt know and these people were around the daycare kids. I understood her concern as I would be upset by that. I wanted her to know know everything because at first I thought hmm maybe this wouldn't be a good fit but as I talked with her and explained that I can't ever say someone may not be in the house and gave her an example that my son very very rare occassion may forget something and him and a friend may come into the home for 5 min to get something and leave (that is NOT against state regs). I also wanted her to know that my husband plays a huge roll in my daycare, he gets to know them, he doesn't "care" for them but he likes to be silly with them and she said she was totally fine with that and appreciated that. She just didn't want a bunch of people sitting around waching ball games every day.
I explained to her that this is a home based business and I'm not going to stop my "home" from being a home.
So this was all explained to her and I asked her if she was ok with all of it and she said yes she seemed like she was be honest.
Even if they were still feeling uneasy about it, common courtesy would have been to call me and tell me.
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Old 05-30-2017, 11:58 AM
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This seems so strange and not at all like a regular no show. You didn't get any red flags. I really hope everything is ok with that family. I don't know, I have a feeling something might be going on.
I was thinking the same thing. Maybe the kid is sick or the parents have something else going on. I would call and be very concerned. Worst case scenario, I move on but by being super nice, hopefully it will make them feel crappy for how they treated me
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Old 05-30-2017, 12:50 PM
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Well since I left a message this morning with no phone call back, I left her an email stating that since they didn't pay and didn't arrive on their scheduled time we had that the opening was no longer available to them as they must have went a different direction.
She emailed me back and claims that she tried calling me to make sure we were on for her start date tomorrow, which she did call but hung up when I answered, then I called her left a message 30 min later.
I am feeling rather uncomfortable maybe they are flaky because I have her email that states she wanted to start her on the 29th but I told her that was Memorial Day and obviously I was closed, she said, oh yes I'm sorry the 30th, we went through how much she would pay for the week.
So I feel like they are trying to pull one, maybe one of them got an extra day off and didn't tell me, but I just feel really uncomfortable with them now.
What would you do????
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Old 05-30-2017, 01:01 PM
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Well since I left a message this morning with no phone call back, I left her an email stating that since they didn't pay and didn't arrive on their scheduled time we had that the opening was no longer available to them as they must have went a different direction.
She emailed me back and claims that she tried calling me to make sure we were on for her start date tomorrow, which she did call but hung up when I answered, then I called her left a message 30 min later.
I am feeling rather uncomfortable maybe they are flaky because I have her email that states she wanted to start her on the 29th but I told her that was Memorial Day and obviously I was closed, she said, oh yes I'm sorry the 30th, we went through how much she would pay for the week.
So I feel like they are trying to pull one, maybe one of them got an extra day off and didn't tell me, but I just feel really uncomfortable with them now.
What would you do????
Hmm, that's a hard one. Do you have other prospects to fill the space? If not and you feel like you are wanting to give this family another shot I would go ahead and do so but with the understanding that you have a trial period (that way you have an out if things start feeling "off" with them) and with the understanding that communication has to be open, honest and within a reasonable time period.

Not being able to reach them would have me concerned but the date/time for start wouldn't really phase me as I just spent the last week thinking the date was X when I was actually off by one. I knew it was Tuesday today but thought it was the 29th today...kwim?

I don't know though....it's got to be your call. If it just feels like a lot of miscommunication, I'd give it a trial at the very least but if it feels wrong all together I'd pass.
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Old 05-30-2017, 01:08 PM
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It does feel like a lot of miscommunication, but it is stated that the 30th is Tuesday unless she just quickly read through it. But one other thing that makes me wonder if there is lack of communication on her part is, back in our original phone call, she asked me if her daughter was normally suppose to be here at 7:30 but she had an appointment and didn't come in until 10 if that was a problem. I said no as long as I know before hand that she will be arriving late that day. She said oh ok, because where she is going now they flipped out on me (her words) because my daughter was late today, she claims she told them but now I'm wondering if she actually did and then I could see them being angry not knowing what's going on.
Oh and as far as filling the spot, that isn't a big deal, I can fill it easily.
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Old 05-30-2017, 01:22 PM
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I'm seeing tons of red flags with this. I would tell her that you are now requiring a 2-week deposit before enrollment and that if she wants to enroll, she'll need to pay that in addition to the tuition. Put her $ where her mouth is. Give 2-3 days for them to decide.
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Old 05-30-2017, 01:54 PM
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I have - twice. Both times it was a mom on assistance so I didn't ask for deposits, although they both filled out the paperwork. Now I don't consider an opening to be filled until I have money in hand.
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Old 05-30-2017, 02:01 PM
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Ok now I am seeing a few red flags, especially bad mouthing the previous provider and this "miscommunication" that happened today.

I would proceed with caution
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Old 05-30-2017, 02:20 PM
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I would tell her she lost the spot. Move on. I am SO SICK of this communication issue with parents these days. Not answering calls, not responding to voicemails, text messages, ect. That is fine when it comes to other things, but if you are looking for and enrolling in new daycare, ANSWER YOUR DAMN PHONE! No excuses! I call BS on all of it! And yes, I have had my phone go dead,be on silent, missed a VM or text, ect. Not when it came to the provider I was lining up care with to start tomorrow. When I know my doc is going to call me with test results, or my dad is going to call me to talk about the clouds int eh sky, I keep the phone close and make sure to answer or at least call back in a timely matter. I am sick of parents doing this to providers. She is wasting your time and we are in 2017. Everyone can choose to be available by phone 24/7 or not, so she has made that choice when it comes to you and daycare and I would not enroll. She doesn't need to be available 24/7, but she can respond to your calls/vm/text. It is NOT hard!
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Old 05-30-2017, 02:41 PM
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I agree. It's a bunch of bs that our answering machine wasn't working. There have been other messages left today for my hubby. Plus I left a message for her this morning so I think either they were not intending to call me thinking I would just move on or they realized one of them had today off and they just didn't call and try to act like it was tomorrow.

Either way I am not getting a good feeling about them so I am not going to take them now. I just do the know if I should email her back or just leave it and hope they don't show up tomorrow morning then having to turn her away.
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Old 05-30-2017, 10:55 PM
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I agree. It's a bunch of bs that our answering machine wasn't working. There have been other messages left today for my hubby. Plus I left a message for her this morning so I think either they were not intending to call me thinking I would just move on or they realized one of them had today off and they just didn't call and try to act like it was tomorrow.

Either way I am not getting a good feeling about them so I am not going to take them now. I just do the know if I should email her back or just leave it and hope they don't show up tomorrow morning then having to turn her away.
Well, if she is not answering your calls/messages at this point, she either won't respond or she will show up tomorrow regardless and claim she never got the messages. If she ends up coming, don't answer the door or answer it with a "wtf?" look on your face and tell her too bad, so sad. Sorry I sound so cranky, but in this day and age of communication options, not being able to get a hold of someone is 99% of the time a CHOICE by the one receiving the call/text. That is fine for life and friends and telemarketers, but when it comes to your child's care,...
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Old 05-31-2017, 02:21 AM
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Well, if she is not answering your calls/messages at this point, she either won't respond or she will show up tomorrow regardless and claim she never got the messages. If she ends up coming, don't answer the door or answer it with a "wtf?" look on your face and tell her too bad, so sad. Sorry I sound so cranky, but in this day and age of communication options, not being able to get a hold of someone is 99% of the time a CHOICE by the one receiving the call/text. That is fine for life and friends and telemarketers, but when it comes to your child's care,...
Agree wholeheartedly. You snooze, you lose. The more you talked about what was going on, the more I felt she was stringing you along and not wanting to come right out and say 'we're no longer interested'. Why can't people adult up and just say it instead of ignoring it? I do this too often, in other ways, but damn, I don't leave people hanging like this. It's childish, selfish and rude.
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Old 05-31-2017, 09:42 AM
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Update- After I emailed her and told her since there was no payment and she didn't show up at her scheduled time and never called me back the spot was no longer available to them and I would be interviewing for the spot.

She emailed right back and said that she tried calling to confirm her drop off for today. Well wouldn't one think that after I call her and leave a message of, are you still coming, I had scheduled drop off of 7:15 ect?? so anyways I didn't email her back, she called me later which I didn't answer because I had kids here so I called her as soon as my last child left. No answer, left a message, no call back, so I called her again at 7:30 and said what is going on. She said well I just wanted you to know that it must be my error I thought I told you that her grandmother was watching her today but I must have thought I did. I explained that communication was already not starting out well and that concerned me. I said I left a message for you this morning and she said yes I know I was at work but had other calls to make on my lunch Ok well obviously she wasn't worried at all about her spot here.
So she claims that since I emailed her I was moving on and she understood that but wanted to apologize for her error and that she didn't want to ruin her future opportunity for an opening later(yeah right). Then she said so when I picked her up at daycare today (I thought she was with grandma???) I told them the situation and they agreed to keep us and I would have to go through the two weeks again.
I said well good luck to you bye and she seemed put off that I didn't answer her question of whether they had a chance for future care. Obviously I am sooooo thankful it turned out this way and they are no longer going to be a problem.
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Old 05-31-2017, 11:18 AM
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Wow it looks like you dodged a PIA parent. Better to know now than later.
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Old 05-31-2017, 11:28 AM
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I had one do this and actually, she was the reason I started requiring a deposit. Interview went great, ours kids got along, lived close by, told them about my vacations (it was about a month before one), signed contracts and thought we were good to go. Then I see the care.com ad she posts looking for care and says "if you take time off, I have to take time off and I will not do that." Yeah...well, if that was a deal breaker you should signed on Very annoying and childish. It's like really, we're all adults, these people ought to be able to at least say they had a change of plans etc. *Sigh* you probably did Dodge a bullet though and hopefully the next one will be better!
Same here!

The deposit is the greatest thing you can do for yourself!
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Old 05-31-2017, 11:30 AM
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Update- After I emailed her and told her since there was no payment and she didn't show up at her scheduled time and never called me back the spot was no longer available to them and I would be interviewing for the spot.

She emailed right back and said that she tried calling to confirm her drop off for today. Well wouldn't one think that after I call her and leave a message of, are you still coming, I had scheduled drop off of 7:15 ect?? so anyways I didn't email her back, she called me later which I didn't answer because I had kids here so I called her as soon as my last child left. No answer, left a message, no call back, so I called her again at 7:30 and said what is going on. She said well I just wanted you to know that it must be my error I thought I told you that her grandmother was watching her today but I must have thought I did. I explained that communication was already not starting out well and that concerned me. I said I left a message for you this morning and she said yes I know I was at work but had other calls to make on my lunch Ok well obviously she wasn't worried at all about her spot here.
So she claims that since I emailed her I was moving on and she understood that but wanted to apologize for her error and that she didn't want to ruin her future opportunity for an opening later(yeah right). Then she said so when I picked her up at daycare today (I thought she was with grandma???) I told them the situation and they agreed to keep us and I would have to go through the two weeks again.
I said well good luck to you bye and she seemed put off that I didn't answer her question of whether they had a chance for future care. Obviously I am sooooo thankful it turned out this way and they are no longer going to be a problem.
Liar liar pants on fire (and irresponsible, inconsiderate "adulting") has led her to have no back up option. Oh brother.
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Old 06-01-2017, 08:49 AM
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Yes I definitely will be taking deposits from now on. Sad how one parent can ruin it, I have never taken a deposit in my 17 yrs. She was back peddling and really digging herself deeper, I didn't say anything but just said great good luck and I think her startled reaction was actually kind of funny like she thought I would feel sorry for her or something. So glad thankful right now
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Old 06-01-2017, 09:20 AM
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Yes I definitely will be taking deposits from now on. Sad how one parent can ruin it, I have never taken a deposit in my 17 yrs. She was back peddling and really digging herself deeper, I didn't say anything but just said great good luck and I think her startled reaction was actually kind of funny like she thought I would feel sorry for her or something. So glad thankful right now
Good riddance
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