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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>For those with Middle/High Schoolers
Country Kids 08:25 AM 11-18-2011
I'm in a pickle with what to do and wanted to see if anyone with older children could help me figure a solution out.

I have three children that are in middle school and high school. One for middle school and 2 for high school.

The middle schooler has signed up to do an after school club for yearbook. The time for it to be done is anywhere from 3:30-4:00. Both very, very hard times for me to pick up. Someone had offered me to pick her up but can't now due to health issues. Well another child that we are good friends with mom offered her a ride yesterday!!!! Awesome I thought!!!!! All of a sudden my daughter walks in at 3:15 and I could tell she was in tears. What happened-other girl had to leave early due to something. My daughter was upset because they were learning something in yearbook and now she doesn't know how to do it. She is now worried she can't do this afterschool thing because I never know if I can pick her up and both rides have fallen through.

Second dilema-high schooler that is staying after to get extra help in class two days a week. Have another one there till 5 doing an afterschool activity but the one getting help is only getting help till 3:30 maybe 4. There is then no where for them to really go because school starts closing up. Can't really be in with other child as its for that group only.

I really want my one child in middle school to participate because they are pretty shy and this is helping tremendously. The other one needs the help and grades are very important if you are going to pass. I'm so at a loss though of what to do!!! Any suggestions from those who have done this?
youretooloud 08:35 AM 11-18-2011
When my youngest was that age, we moved, so the school was far away from home. So, I shortened my hours so I was getting off work at 4:30, and could pick her up. She might have to hang around the school for 30-ish minutes, but it wasn't two hours or anything.

None of my parents WORKED til fiove or six though, so it wasn't hard to make the change.

Before that, we lived less than a mile from all the schools, so the kids could walk to and from without my help.
MyAngels 08:59 AM 11-18-2011
Are either of the high schoolers driving yet? When my oldest turned 16 we bought a car and he became more responsible for helping to get his brother and sister where they needed to go. If my oldest was tied up and the younger kids had to wait, they just went to the student lounge and did homework until he was done.

If that was not possible, then we depended a lot on other parents whose kids were in the same activities to shuttle ours around. My daughter did yearbook all through high school and got rides home from other girls whose parents were able to pick up. She made a lot of new friends that way. I picked up the slack on the weekends for some of the parents who drove during the week by taking their kids to and from.

We also have a public bus system here that we would have used had it been necessary.
graham.shellbell 09:02 AM 11-18-2011
Could you maybe find someone to provide the transportation and pay them?? Maybe a college kid or someone retired and just looking for a few bucks here and there. Or ask whoever is leading that activity if maybe they could talk to other parents in the group to see if they could provide a ride for your daughter.. we have high schoolers and are forever giving other kids from their groups rides home here and there.
christinaskids 09:07 AM 11-18-2011
When i was in high school, i rode the public busses everywhere and knew the routes pretty well. Thats a good option for the older ones, not sure if you feel comfortable with the middle schooler.
wdmmom 09:08 AM 11-18-2011
I'd check with a neighbor, friend, cousin, etc.

My kids know full and well that picking them up is not an option and walking is about 2 miles.

They are welcome to do anything extra they want but they are in charge of finding their own way there and back.
melskids 09:55 AM 11-18-2011
our school is 12 miles away...and my son REALLY wanted to do art club this year. so my hubby has to leave work by 3:00 to get him by 5:00! (the hubs works 70 miles away in the other direction...but we have no choice.)

maybe you could ask another highschooler who has a license?
daycare 09:57 AM 11-18-2011
I think a lot of us are in this same boat.

I really rely on ride shares. I reach out to everyone and anyone I can trust to help.

My kids school is far, over 8 miles away. No way that they could walk.

I am also new in town, so I don't know too many people. BUt, I have figured out how to make it work.

Make your high schoolers stay together. The one that gets done early can take up reading, or crafting something like friendship bracelets. Maybe they can go to the library and read or study ahead.

As for your daughter, talk with the teacher and let he know how important it is to her. I did this when my daughter wanted to be in ASB and I could not deal with the crazy schedule they had. Not only was it after school stuff, my daughter also had to participate in community service hours.

the teacher was kind enough to send out an email asking other families for a ride share, of course with my permission. We got one within a day.

My husband and I do all we can to ride share. We drop off and pick up as much as we can.

Right now, I pay my son's friends mom $25.00 a month to take my son to and from school. The only issues we have is that when her son gets sick, we have no way for him to get there.

There is always a way to do it...It's just going to take work.
Solandia 10:13 AM 11-18-2011
We are a few miles from the school, but we are lucky...the school does an extra bus run for kids in activities. School is out at 2:45, most activities/practices end between 3:30-4pm, the late bus runs at 4:20ish.

For kids who are out of town, who can't hitch a ride with someone, cant make or miss the late bus, or it doesn't run near them....they walk to the public library to do homework or hang out until mom/dad/grandparent can pick up. There are a ton of kids who do that. There is a wonderful teen area setup, and it monitored fairly decently by the library staff.

The teachers are also really good about helping with finding rides and asking for help for families who do need transportation.
Sugar Magnolia 10:29 AM 11-18-2011
I can offer no advice, just sympathy. My son is in 11th grade and struggles with chemistry, so he stays after school twice a week for tutoring. He knows we can't get him, so he walks home or uses the city bus. Its 3.5 miles. I feel like crap about it. I'm sorry you are struggling with this too. Best wishes.
familyschoolcare 08:12 PM 11-20-2011
I am assuming that the schools are too far to walk. That is how I handel extra school activities but the middle school is 4 blocks down the street and the high school is just on the other side of an over pass right next to the middle school.
Meyou 03:46 AM 11-21-2011
My 7th grader has a bus pass and rides the bus everywhere since I'm tied up with the kids afterschool. She has a schedule, route map, cell phone and pass daily so she can keep in touch.
SilverSabre25 05:08 AM 11-21-2011
Is there a SAHM in your neighbor hood you could pay $20/week to pick up your kids? Especially if the schools aren't that far away.
permanentvacation 02:26 PM 11-21-2011
See if you can afford to buy a vehicle that fits everyone in - I used to have a 15 passanger van - so you can get your children back and forth to wherever they have to go. Tell your current daycare clients and new ones on the interview that you have to take your children to/from school at the specific times your kids need you to. Let the parents know that this will be your routine. I did this for for about 7 years! I took my daughters to private school, piano lessons, soccer, karate, church functions, etc. For YEARS during daycare hours with the daycare kids. Yes, some parents will fuss over it and not hire you, but for the most part, I didn't have problems with my parents about it. I made it clear to my parents that I provide a great daycare service to their children and also want to be a great mother to my own children which includes making sure they get to and from the places they need to go.

You can also see about hiring someone to work for you during the times you need to take/pick up your children. The only problem with that is if your employee doesn't come to work that day, you can't get your kids picked up. I personally like to rely only on myself if possible!

Often times, an arrangement made with other parents/kids to get your children where they need to go don't last long and your kids might be left stranded somewhere with no notice! If at all possible, I would try to be able to get them yourself.

You can also see if you can get them to ride a public bus. Or, if you can afford it and feel comfortable, have them take a cab. If they make/have friends whose parents pick them up at the same time, maybe your child can go to their house to hang out until you get off work and can pick them up from their friends' houses. But then you have to hope they don't leave you hanging out of the blue one day. You might be able to change your daycare hours so you are off work by the time you have to get your kids. You can try to start advertising now for an earlier shift of kids. Or see if there is a need for overnight care in your area and offer that shift.
Tags:high school, shy, teens
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