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Old 08-21-2019, 06:29 AM
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Msdunny Msdunny is online now
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Default 3yo Freak Out

Looking for a little help. I have a 3 yo dcb (turning 3 in Sept.). He absolutely FREAKS OUT if he hears a baby cry. starts a screaming cry, and rubs his eyes. He cannot be consoled. I've never experienced this before. I have tried holding him and consoling, ignoring the behavior, and yesterday I put him in a spot alone to try to calm down. When he would try to start up again, I would say, "Nope, this is not a crying thing." He pulled it together eventually. But I don't want to be cruel to him. I have an infant starting in 2 weeks, so I really want to try and figure out how to best handle this before we jump into the deep end with a new tiny one.

Now for more info. - This little dcb has a dad that is...strange...to say the least. Like I said, he is nearly 3, but dad still brings a bottle of milk for him every day because he 'won't sleep without a ba-ba'. (I take the bottle, then pour the milk into a cup for his snack. He never gets it at nap time.) Dad came in last week when it was raining. He picked up dcb and said, "listen buddy, It is raining, and you are going to freak out, but I will get you in the car as quick as I can." Kiddo was fine up until this point. Dad comes in in the morning, and before he even speaks to me, he starts whispering in the boy's ear - things like 'I love you so much, you are the best thing in my world, etc.' So Strange. Both parents baby him like crazy, but he is very sweet and generally not too needy here. But this freaking out! I just can't!!

Thanks in advance for any words of wisdom!!
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Old 08-21-2019, 06:40 AM
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Cat Herder Cat Herder is offline
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Marriage issues?

I would just keep sending him to the calm down spot to self soothe. I would also make Dad take the bottle with him when he leaves.

Do you have the parents complete ASQ's? Track milestones and development?
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Old 08-21-2019, 06:46 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cat Herder View Post
Marriage issues?

I would just keep sending him to the calm down spot to self soothe. I would also make Dad take the bottle with him when he leaves.

Do you have the parents complete ASQ's? Track milestones and development?
I haven't, but I think I will start this fall. His parents are just now starting to try to potty train, and dad tells me when they try to get him to sit on the potty, he screams and throws a fit. I don't have any trouble getting him to sit on the potty, but have never had success with him actually using it. I'll be honest, though, I don't try too hard since mom and dad don't seem to be trying very hard.

Thanks!
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Old 08-21-2019, 06:47 AM
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I can't stand when parents foster these feelings.I think your best bet would be how you just said "nope not doing that here".I also would ask for a meeting with the parents .I would call the Dad out for making the child scared and nervous.In a diplomatic way of course.Something like '' I notice when you drop off or pick up you give negative feed to little Johnny".He will probally look at you funny like you are the crazy one.Maybe explain how you perceive the drop off should go.As far as the bottle I wouldn't except it into my house. I always read books about new babies when a new one was coming to DC.Let the children know babies cry,because they can't talk.Good Luck hopefully you can save him from the crazy .
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3 year old, contagious behavior, developmental milestones, unreasonable parental expectations

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