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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>Help With Polite But Firm Words For Pick Up Issue
Indoorvoice 11:54 AM 09-20-2017
Grandma recently started picking up 3x a week and has not been made familiar with my pick up policies since I didn't know she was going to be picking up so often. She is pure chaos in person form. Worse than any child I've encountered. Comes in singing loudly, screams dcg's in high pitched voice to greet, extremely show offy, brings in school aged grandkid and let's her run around house with shoes on. When I try to discipline or ask her to she ignores/does not back me up/keeps talking. When I walk away/try to shove out the door, she refuses and keeps talking or follows me which is even more disruptive. Plus little sweet dcg who is normally awesome completely picks up on the chaos and runs around, breaks rules etc. Babies are scared and crying and she just. Keeps. Talking. I can't do bye bye outside because she comes at random days and times. Never know when she's coming and parents don't know their schedule day to day so can't let me know ahead of time. They're self employed. Trying to figure out this situation and exactly what I'm going to say. I don't want to be harsh because I actually want her to pick up since she picks up at least an hour earlier than parents, but I need to reign in this behavior. I've allowed these things to go on thus far so she's going to be resistant and ask questions when I try to make new rules. Help?
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daycarediva 12:14 PM 09-20-2017
Be direct, but kind.

Grandma, I would love to chat but I'm working and the babies are afraid of strangers. I'm going to have to ask you to be quick at pick up times. THANK YOU!

SORRY!!!
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Kajada 12:45 PM 09-20-2017
Good grief. I don't have any experience with this kind of situation, but here are my ideas :

- if I understand correctly, you never know when Grandma will be picking-up? I get that the parents' schedules are unpredictable, but I would ask that they let you know who will be there to collect the child, even if it's a quick text during the day.

- try to set a pick-up time or ask for a call or text that says she's on her way. I always prefer to have a general idea of when kids will be picked-up so I can help the kids get ready (not just shoes and jacket, but end-of-day transition stuff, like putting away toys.)

- make it clear that kids who aren't enrolled cannot enter the playroom or daycare space. It upsets the others, throws off your schedule, gets dirt everywhere...these are all valid reasons to me. Can you put a gate up near the door to stop them from coming in any further? (assuming regulations let you do this)

- if you have pick-up policies already in place, give her a copy. Ask her to sign it. If she will be picking up regularly, she needs to follow the rules.

And yeah, be firm. You're busy! The babies are crying! Good-bye, Grandma!
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Blackcat31 01:07 PM 09-20-2017
Originally Posted by daycarediva:
Be direct, but kind.

Grandma, I would love to chat but I'm working and the babies are afraid of strangers. I'm going to have to ask you to be quick at pick up times. THANK YOU!

SORRY!!!
This ^^^ or you can always go directly to the parent of the child and let them know that grandma is "difficult" for pick up and why.
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nannyde 01:29 PM 09-20-2017
Require the Grandma call or text you five minutes before arrival. Do NOT answer the door until you have the kid dressed and physically hand her through the door.. then shut the door.

If she comes without calling do not answer the door. Get the kid ready to go and step out the door with one foot and place the kid far enough out the door that you can shut the door behind her. Just say "she had a great day" and go shut door.
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hwichlaz 01:44 PM 09-20-2017
Yes, lock the door at the earliest possible time for her to pick up so she can't just walk in, then don't let her in. Inform her ahead of time that picking up at different times is really disruptive to the kids, and that you understand that she needs to do it, but it'll be happening on the porch from now on to keep the babies from freaking out.
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284878 06:06 AM 09-21-2017
Originally Posted by nannyde:
Require the Grandma call or text you five minutes before arrival. Do NOT answer the door until you have the kid dressed and physically hand her through the door.. then shut the door.

If she comes without calling do not answer the door. Get the kid ready to go and step out the door with one foot and place the kid far enough out the door that you can shut the door behind her. Just say "she had a great day" and go shut door.
This is basically what I do.
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MarinaVanessa 07:51 AM 09-21-2017
Everything Nan.

Also as far as bringing SA sibling ... blame it on ratios and licensing. Nope he can't come in, he's not a registered kid and he puts you out of ratio.
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Tags:locked doors, pick up issues
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