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Daycare Center and Family Home Forum>I Hate When They Are Slow To Leave
DancingQueen 09:33 AM 04-13-2011
I have a daycare mom who struggles with getting her dd out of here. I think a lot of it has to do with not wanting to cause a scene in front of people. I'm fine with the scene. I'd rather you dragged her out of here kicking and screaming than let her play you for 20 minutes!
Happened again Monday when we were outdoors playing at pick up time. Drives me batty.
so now I drag her to the car for mom (who is carrying an infant in a car seat at the same time). I told mom "I'm OK if she kicks me, I'd rather she understood that when you told her it was time to go then it was time to go."
Mom seemed put off by it but seemed to get it at the same time.
How do you handle these situations?
Happened again Monday when we were outdoors playing at pick up time. Drives me batty.
so now I drag her to the car for mom (who is carrying an infant in a car seat at the same time). I told mom "I'm OK if she kicks me, I'd rather she understood that when you told her it was time to go then it was time to go."
Mom seemed put off by it but seemed to get it at the same time.
How do you handle these situations?
BentleysBands 09:36 AM 04-13-2011
Been there done that and I also dreaded pickups. I tried everything and nothing worked.the parents I have now r awesome in everyway. I'd love to hear others advice tho
kitkat 09:39 AM 04-13-2011
I would have done the same exact thing! Hopefully Mom gets it. I'm sure she will if you have to do that a few more times. I also warn the kids that when mom gets here, it's time to go...no more playing, put your toys away, and go home.
PitterPatter 09:43 AM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by DancingQueen:
I have a daycare mom who struggles with getting her dd out of here. I think a lot of it has to do with not wanting to cause a scene in front of people. I'm fine with the scene. I'd rather you dragged her out of here kicking and screaming than let her play you for 20 minutes!Happened again Monday when we were outdoors playing at pick up time. Drives me batty.
so now I drag her to the car for mom (who is carrying an infant in a car seat at the same time). I told mom "I'm OK if she kicks me, I'd rather she understood that when you told her it was time to go then it was time to go."
Mom seemed put off by it but seemed to get it at the same time.
How do you handle these situations?
I have a daycare mom who struggles with getting her dd out of here. I think a lot of it has to do with not wanting to cause a scene in front of people. I'm fine with the scene. I'd rather you dragged her out of here kicking and screaming than let her play you for 20 minutes!Happened again Monday when we were outdoors playing at pick up time. Drives me batty.
so now I drag her to the car for mom (who is carrying an infant in a car seat at the same time). I told mom "I'm OK if she kicks me, I'd rather she understood that when you told her it was time to go then it was time to go."
Mom seemed put off by it but seemed to get it at the same time.
How do you handle these situations?
I had the same problem and got a lot of relpies from the group here. So now I TRY to have coats on ready at the door with the sign out sheet on a clipboard. Nope not working well. Mother squeezes past me and just starts a convo. If it's about the kids I engage but when it's gossip or complaining about her life I just say oh sorry to hear that and open the screen door back up trying to get the hint across since me telling her I have to get dinner etc doesn't sink in. After DCM squeezed had past me the kids now have the oportunity to take off back through the house and get toys out as I stand on my porch with the screen door open waiting.... and the drama continues. I wish I had some advise for u but I'm lost here as well.
TBird 09:47 AM 04-13-2011
These are the kids/parents where if you're outside and you see them coming down the street, you RUN to their car with the kid and take the entire process out of their hands. If you're inside, it's the same thing...keep one eye on the window and have them READY at the door (push them through the crack while telling the parent about their day), LOL!!! If none of that works...GOTTA RUN, BYE!!!
mickey2 09:54 AM 04-13-2011
I don't put up with it! No hoochy cooing for any length of time at drop off in the am and at pick up if mom or dad do not have control of their kids I take over. I have had to do it once or twice but now I have no problems.
I flat out tell them at interviews I DO NOT allow drama or drawn out pickup or drop off times.
Make it short and quick!
I flat out tell them at interviews I DO NOT allow drama or drawn out pickup or drop off times.
Make it short and quick!
PitterPatter 09:58 AM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by TBird:
These are the kids/parents where if you're outside and you see them coming down the street, you RUN to their car with the kid and take the entire process out of their hands. If you're inside, it's the same thing...keep one eye on the window and have them READY at the door (push them through the crack while telling the parent about their day), LOL!!! If none of that works...GOTTA RUN, BYE!!!
Oh no summer is coming! I just remarked how I loved summer on another thread but now I do know 1 thing bad. When we are outside playing and a parent arrives for pick-up. The parent NEVER leaves!! I think there's still 1 out there in the yard from last summer These are the kids/parents where if you're outside and you see them coming down the street, you RUN to their car with the kid and take the entire process out of their hands. If you're inside, it's the same thing...keep one eye on the window and have them READY at the door (push them through the crack while telling the parent about their day), LOL!!! If none of that works...GOTTA RUN, BYE!!!
Seriously 1 would actually open the gate come in and sit down on the patio and chat. I would be telling dcb 4 I would see him tomorrow by bye and the Dad would tell him go play for a few minutes and stay there for over an hour sometimes!! I would just walk around pushing kids on the swings and even ventured to the end of the yard (125 ft out) pretending too look for butterflies with the kids. There's DCD still relaxing on the patio. UGH!!
TBird 10:04 AM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by Tygerluv:
I think there's still 1 out there in the yard from last summer
OMG, STILL LAUGHING!!! Please don't say things like this...it's nap time here!!!I think there's still 1 out there in the yard from last summer
ninosqueridos 10:07 AM 04-13-2011
https://www.daycare.com/nannyde/the-...in-daycare.htm
Nannyde has a great way to handle pickups and dropoffs in the "buh bye outside" section of this article linked above. If you're already outside, you could use the "gate" as your "door."
Nannyde has a great way to handle pickups and dropoffs in the "buh bye outside" section of this article linked above. If you're already outside, you could use the "gate" as your "door."
cheerfuldom 10:08 AM 04-13-2011
so hilarious. I don't let parents hang out period. I have everyone ready to go, hand parent the bag and push kiddo out the door and then shut the door. One mom wouldnt take the bag in effort to chat longer so I put the bag on the porch and closed the door. see ya! I have some that are in my front yard for awhile trying to wrastle kiddo into the car seat but thats not my problem. They leave a lot faster when I force them to.
TBird 10:11 AM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
One mom wouldnt take the bag in effort to chat longer so I put the bag on the porch and closed the door. see ya!
BWAAAAAAAAAAA HA HA HA HA HA!!! I swear you guys are in rare form today...One mom wouldnt take the bag in effort to chat longer so I put the bag on the porch and closed the door. see ya!
MamaBear 10:14 AM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by Children First:
I don't put up with it! No hoochy cooing for any length of time at drop off in the am and at pick up if mom or dad do not have control of their kids I take over. I have had to do it once or twice but now I have no problems.
I flat out tell them at interviews I DO NOT allow drama or drawn out pickup or drop off times.
Make it short and quick!
Me too! I cant stand the long drawn out drop offs and pick ups... Just drop and go... pick up and go. Give me a 'quick' report of anything I need to go and then bye bye. I have them ready to go at pick ups so theres no chaos. Sometimes I even hand over the child if there the type to run back in the house & try to play again.I don't put up with it! No hoochy cooing for any length of time at drop off in the am and at pick up if mom or dad do not have control of their kids I take over. I have had to do it once or twice but now I have no problems.
I flat out tell them at interviews I DO NOT allow drama or drawn out pickup or drop off times.
Make it short and quick!
I had a mom who nearly drove me crazy a few years ago that would stay for 30 minutes EVERY morning. I think she wanted to be my friend and chit-chat. Finally I had it and now they know from the tour date that I dont play that. If they dont like that type of situation, then they can choose another daycare. At least theres no surprises later and the parents dont seem to mind.
I've learned over the years that you just cant be buddies with the daycare parents... It just doesnt work for me. It makes for sticky situations. The quicker the drop offs the easier the transition is for the child. The longer the parent hangs around, the more difficult it is on the child and becomes so disruptive for everyone else. Thats what I think anyway
morgan24 10:16 AM 04-13-2011
When they won't get ready for their parents and the parents seem to want to hang around. I take over. I drop down in front of the child who is refusing to put on their coat or shoes and tell them that it's time to go. If they are old enough to put their own shoes on I hand them their shoes if not I put them on. After I'm done helping I stand up and say I have things to do see you tomorrow. Bye. When we are outside, as the parents are walking up the sidewalk I open the gate and put Junior out and close the gate and lock it and sit down on my swing. They usually get the hint after a couple of times.
DancingQueen 10:21 AM 04-13-2011
with my random pick up times it gets tricky. I can't say "time for you to get out of my yard" when I have 2 kids still needing to be picked up
But I do rather ignore the parent and play with the kids (or rake LOL) if they linger.
I used to have a mom - my latest pick up - LOVED it when she hung out - she brought me wine and we shared it every friday by the sand box.
But this is different.
But I do rather ignore the parent and play with the kids (or rake LOL) if they linger.
I used to have a mom - my latest pick up - LOVED it when she hung out - she brought me wine and we shared it every friday by the sand box.
But this is different.
PitterPatter 10:29 AM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by cheerfuldom:
so hilarious. I don't let parents hang out period. I have everyone ready to go, hand parent the bag and push kiddo out the door and then shut the door. One mom wouldnt take the bag in effort to chat longer so I put the bag on the porch and closed the door. see ya! I have some that are in my front yard for awhile trying to wrastle kiddo into the car seat but thats not my problem. They leave a lot faster when I force them to.
OMG no u didn't!!! so hilarious. I don't let parents hang out period. I have everyone ready to go, hand parent the bag and push kiddo out the door and then shut the door. One mom wouldnt take the bag in effort to chat longer so I put the bag on the porch and closed the door. see ya! I have some that are in my front yard for awhile trying to wrastle kiddo into the car seat but thats not my problem. They leave a lot faster when I force them to.
What did she say?? Holy moly u got a steel backbone girlie!! lol
Can u make 1 of those up for me?
I am very polite and still get comments and looks like I am rude for rushing them out the door. The average DCP spends 5-15 minutes saying goodbye at pick up. To me that's 5-10 minutes too long.
PitterPatter 10:33 AM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by morgan24:
When we are outside, as the parents are walking up the sidewalk I open the gate and put Junior out and close the gate and lock it and sit down on my swing. They usually get the hint after a couple of times.
When we are outside, as the parents are walking up the sidewalk I open the gate and put Junior out and close the gate and lock it and sit down on my swing. They usually get the hint after a couple of times.
That's too funny!! I can just picture that!! Do u pick up a magazine and hold it up to your face too? j/k
Blackcat31 10:38 AM 04-13-2011
Because the weather in my area has been fairly decent in the last few days we have been getting to spend more time outside. So last week I had a dcm come pick up her 2 yr old dd. DCM hung around outside for a bit and after about 10 minutes, she was ready to go so she looks at me and says
"Are you going to be taking the kids inside soon so we can leave?"
I told her "Ummm, we just got out here."
she says "Well, I hate to be the bad guy and MAKE her leave so I just thought it would be easier if I said everyone is going inside. Maybe you could just have the kids all stand in the coat room and pretend you are staying inside until we leave?"
Umm, yeah that would be easier for YOU but I am not going to make everyone pretend to go inside so dcm doesn't have to be the bad guy.....
"Are you going to be taking the kids inside soon so we can leave?"
I told her "Ummm, we just got out here."
she says "Well, I hate to be the bad guy and MAKE her leave so I just thought it would be easier if I said everyone is going inside. Maybe you could just have the kids all stand in the coat room and pretend you are staying inside until we leave?"
Umm, yeah that would be easier for YOU but I am not going to make everyone pretend to go inside so dcm doesn't have to be the bad guy.....
cheerfuldom 10:39 AM 04-13-2011
She didn't say anything. Drop offs and pick up times, I don't mess around. I am way to overworked and exhausted to entertain people at the end of the day. I had one mom complain that I rushed them out and obviously didn't like their son otherwise I would want him to stay longer (like 10 hours a day wasn't enough) Needless to say, she was so needy in many ways and they left after awhile. I was going to term him soon anyway. this is the parent that wants "someone to love their child just as their mom would". Unreasonable....no one can love you like mama does and you can't pay someone to love your child.
PitterPatter 10:44 AM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by Blackcat31:
Because the weather in my area has been fairly decent in the last few days we have been getting to spend more time outside. So last week I had a dcm come pick up her 2 yr old dd. DCM hung around outside for a bit and after about 10 minutes, she was ready to go so she looks at me and says
"Are you going to be taking the kids inside soon so we can leave?"
I told her "Ummm, we just got out here."
she says "Well, I hate to be the bad guy and MAKE her leave so I just thought it would be easier if I said everyone is going inside. Maybe you could just have the kids all stand in the coat room and pretend you are staying inside until we leave?"
Umm, yeah that would be easier for YOU but I am not going to make everyone pretend to go inside so dcm doesn't have to be the bad guy.....
Oh my gosh! Pretending to make them go inside would make me the bad guy because when I try to get them in a couple throw fits! How rude of her to expect u to do that to the children to spare herself.Because the weather in my area has been fairly decent in the last few days we have been getting to spend more time outside. So last week I had a dcm come pick up her 2 yr old dd. DCM hung around outside for a bit and after about 10 minutes, she was ready to go so she looks at me and says
"Are you going to be taking the kids inside soon so we can leave?"
I told her "Ummm, we just got out here."
she says "Well, I hate to be the bad guy and MAKE her leave so I just thought it would be easier if I said everyone is going inside. Maybe you could just have the kids all stand in the coat room and pretend you are staying inside until we leave?"
Umm, yeah that would be easier for YOU but I am not going to make everyone pretend to go inside so dcm doesn't have to be the bad guy.....
Blackcat31 10:55 AM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by Tygerluv:
Oh my gosh! Pretending to make them go inside would make me the bad guy because when I try to get them in a couple throw fits! How rude of her to expect u to do that to the children to spare herself.
Yeah, she ended up literally dragging her dd to the car and then this morning she asked me what time we plan on going outside! LOL!! Oh my gosh! Pretending to make them go inside would make me the bad guy because when I try to get them in a couple throw fits! How rude of her to expect u to do that to the children to spare herself.
I said all day if we can! I know she was just trying to avoid a big tantrum and all and I do feel for her since 2 yrs old is tough but seriously? She is going to have to learn to deal with it! We live outside in the summer!
daycare 02:34 PM 04-13-2011
yesterday at pick up one of my kids who turns into the devil as soon as a parent walk in the door had to sit in time out. I made the dad sit in his car while the kid sat in time out. I then printed out my phb section that covered parents needing to enforce DC rules when present.
When the time out was over, I walked DCB out to the car and handed the dad the note. He said Im sorry about that and I said please dont let it happen again. we smiled at each other and on their way they went.
I am interested to see what will happen today at pickup...lol
When the time out was over, I walked DCB out to the car and handed the dad the note. He said Im sorry about that and I said please dont let it happen again. we smiled at each other and on their way they went.
I am interested to see what will happen today at pickup...lol
SandeeAR 03:05 PM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by MamaBear:
I've learned over the years that you just cant be buddies with the daycare parents... It just doesnt work for me. It makes for sticky situations.
I keep seeing folks post this sort of thing. Does everyone else feel this way?I've learned over the years that you just cant be buddies with the daycare parents... It just doesnt work for me. It makes for sticky situations.
I was friends with all my parents before I started, and we are still friends. Never been a problem for us.
daycare 03:21 PM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by SandeeAR:
I keep seeing folks post this sort of thing. Does everyone else feel this way?
I was friends with all my parents before I started, and we are still friends. Never been a problem for us.
I do... Business and pleasure never mix together in any type of business....I keep seeing folks post this sort of thing. Does everyone else feel this way?
I was friends with all my parents before I started, and we are still friends. Never been a problem for us.
SandeeAR 03:27 PM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by daycare:
I do... Business and pleasure never mix together in any type of business....
I do... Business and pleasure never mix together in any type of business....
See, and I think it is all in how you handle things. I've been in other business with friends before too. My parent all know that this is a business for me. But, as caring adults, we are able to keep things on an even mix.
daycare 03:37 PM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by SandeeAR:
See, and I think it is all in how you handle things. I've been in other business with friends before too. My parent all know that this is a business for me. But, as caring adults, we are able to keep things on an even mix.
maybe its becuase i dont trust most people as far as I can throw them....See, and I think it is all in how you handle things. I've been in other business with friends before too. My parent all know that this is a business for me. But, as caring adults, we are able to keep things on an even mix.
I have owned other companies and it never worked out. But maybe this is just me..
I think the fastest way to lose a friend is to:
do business with them
become their roommate
date thier ex's
lol
MsMe 04:26 PM 04-13-2011
I do not nor would I ever hang out socialy with Daycare parents. I am planning on getting together to refinish a piece of furniture with a Mom I have had for four years. I am nervous but I think it will go well.
I am however the opposite of everyone here and I don't mind at all when a parent comes for pick up and we are outside playing and Johnny plays for another 10-15 minutes. We chat about the child, what exciting new theme we have a daycare, new toys, general news (noever politics or religion) .....ect. We DO NOT talk about our personal lives. They don't normaly stay so long on days when we are in the house. I do however require that they come in and get the child. I do not help with shoes and coat and I would NEVER have achild ready to go and waiting at the door.
I am however the opposite of everyone here and I don't mind at all when a parent comes for pick up and we are outside playing and Johnny plays for another 10-15 minutes. We chat about the child, what exciting new theme we have a daycare, new toys, general news (noever politics or religion) .....ect. We DO NOT talk about our personal lives. They don't normaly stay so long on days when we are in the house. I do however require that they come in and get the child. I do not help with shoes and coat and I would NEVER have achild ready to go and waiting at the door.
PitterPatter 05:25 PM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by MsMe:
I do not nor would I ever hang out socialy with Daycare parents. I am planning on getting together to refinish a piece of furniture with a Mom I have had for four years. I am nervous but I think it will go well.
I am however the opposite of everyone here and I don't mind at all when a parent comes for pick up and we are outside playing and Johnny plays for another 10-15 minutes. We chat about the child, what exciting new theme we have a daycare, new toys, general news (noever politics or religion) .....ect. We DO NOT talk about our personal lives. They don't normaly stay so long on days when we are in the house. I do however require that they come in and get the child. I do not help with shoes and coat and I would NEVER have achild ready to go and waiting at the door.
Well if it were just that, convo about the child(ren) then that would be ok with me but it's usually DRAMA. Newer DCM, all she does is talk crap on her friends and family. She doesnt care what I have to say about the kids. The worst are the stories about her case worker trying to boss her around during home inspections. I'm just so sick of hearing it. I don't even know any of the people she talks about so why would I care anyway. I do not nor would I ever hang out socialy with Daycare parents. I am planning on getting together to refinish a piece of furniture with a Mom I have had for four years. I am nervous but I think it will go well.
I am however the opposite of everyone here and I don't mind at all when a parent comes for pick up and we are outside playing and Johnny plays for another 10-15 minutes. We chat about the child, what exciting new theme we have a daycare, new toys, general news (noever politics or religion) .....ect. We DO NOT talk about our personal lives. They don't normaly stay so long on days when we are in the house. I do however require that they come in and get the child. I do not help with shoes and coat and I would NEVER have achild ready to go and waiting at the door.
Then there's her complaints like she didn't get her gas card from the state like they are supposed to send. She already gets food stamps, free daycare, a welfare check, a free cell phone with 250 free minutes loaded evey month by the state and now she stands here whining because her gas card isn't loaded yet? It actually makes me mad to hear her ungrateful attitude. She doesn't even really work. She does community service! I also stand there wondering what she must say about me if she has all this gossip about everyone else. AND her doorstep needs a DEEP cleaning before she dares tread on anyone elses. I feel sorry for her poor kids! That's all I will say about them. J
ust today she was here for 35 minutes walking around my house on her cell phone carrying on a conversation AFTER the kids were signed out. I got the kids ready and took them to the door. She walked away talking on the cell. I cut her off and said the kids are ready to go. She had the nerve to hold her hand up like wait a minute turned away from me and walked through the house again into my kitchen.
I was STEAMING!!! I thought ok let it go maybe it's a Dr or something. She finally hangs up and says it was her Avon lady! WTH??? I just handed her the bag and opened the door and said I'll see u guys tomorrow. I REALLY had to bite my tongue there!
MsMe 06:01 PM 04-13-2011
WOW that would be terrrible. I have never had anything like that happen!!!!! I wouls have told her to go as well. I have never even seen a DCP have their phone in there hand!!!
daycare 06:04 PM 04-13-2011
I would not mind if they wanted to ask questions about their kids or talk about what did that day, but the cell phone thing Oh heck NO.... (yes I was shaking my neck) lol
As long as they have a grip on their kids and they are not acting out then they can talk to me. As soon as the kids start to go crazy, you're outta here...
Tiger you have a lot of patience...
As long as they have a grip on their kids and they are not acting out then they can talk to me. As soon as the kids start to go crazy, you're outta here...
Tiger you have a lot of patience...
PitterPatter 06:43 PM 04-13-2011
Originally Posted by daycare:
I would not mind if they wanted to ask questions about their kids or talk about what did that day, but the cell phone thing Oh heck NO.... (yes I was shaking my neck) lol
As long as they have a grip on their kids and they are not acting out then they can talk to me. As soon as the kids start to go crazy, you're outta here...
Tiger you have a lot of patience...
When it comes to dealing with rude clients I try to keep a lil 'prayer' in mind.I would not mind if they wanted to ask questions about their kids or talk about what did that day, but the cell phone thing Oh heck NO.... (yes I was shaking my neck) lol
As long as they have a grip on their kids and they are not acting out then they can talk to me. As soon as the kids start to go crazy, you're outta here...
Tiger you have a lot of patience...
Please keep your arm around my shoulder, And your hand over my mouth!
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