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Old 02-28-2013, 01:37 PM
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MNMum MNMum is offline Member
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Location: Minnestoa
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Default Biting Policy?

Background: I have an 18 mo dcg who attends Tues/Thurs, she is with Gma M/W/F. She has always been an intense, fast moving, stubborn personality. She is the one I had major issues getting to nap, and I nearly termed her for that a few months ago (she is now napping fine).

She has now successfully biten other children twice, breaking the skin both times. About 1 mo ago and today. Last week I intercepted a near bite, and again today intercepted a near bite. I have been observing the group. The child she bites doesn't necessarily do anything to the biter, she is just playing near her.

What would you do? Luckily the child she has successfully biten (twice) has reasonable parents. If it had been the other toddler I would already be letting this child go, as her mother would pull her child (fulltime and not aggressive). Should I be warning the parents of the biter that this could lead to termination if it happens again?

I'm not willing to try to segregate the biter permanently and I can't shadow her all the time. This has happened over about a months time.
MnMum married to DH 9 yrs
Mum to Girl 11, Girl 8, Boy 4.5, Boy 9 mos
DCK's 3, 3, 18 mos, 4 mos
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Old 02-28-2013, 01:51 PM
Willow Willow is offline
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I think the problem likely lies in the instability of her schedule.

If I were you I'd probably be willing to keep her only if I could have her m-f. I don't think you can fix this when her schedule is so different day to day.

I'd term if the parents can't agree to that and segregating her or having her shadow you isn't an option.
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Old 02-28-2013, 03:33 PM
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MNMum MNMum is offline Member
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Location: Minnestoa
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I wonder if the 2 days per week thing isn't making her life difficult. I think many kids could adjust to this. Mine always did fine in these situations. But this child's personality might not be able to smoothly make the transition each day...

Any one else with thoughts on what they would do?

How long do you "work" on this?
MnMum married to DH 9 yrs
Mum to Girl 11, Girl 8, Boy 4.5, Boy 9 mos
DCK's 3, 3, 18 mos, 4 mos
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Old 02-28-2013, 03:50 PM
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Holiday Park Holiday Park is offline
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I had a dcg the same age and exactly how you described! I let it go on fr 3 months and finally had to term. I told the bitten dcb's mom that if it happened again the biter would be terminated.
Im glad I told her that because it made it easier to actually do it since I had made that promise. I also had her only two days a week. Mom had her wednesday's, I had her mon&fri's, and gramma's took turns having her tue's&thur's . One of the gramma's babysat a cousin who was doing the biting to her first, and that is where she learned to be aggressive.
Come to find out mom&dad were not so nice themselves when it came time to terminate care. They got really mean&nasty with me and behaved just like bullies toward me. Now I know where she also got tht behavior from too! Never again!
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Old 02-28-2013, 04:10 PM
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CedarCreek CedarCreek is offline
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Location: Texas
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I'm dealing with a two year old biter right now as well. Sigh.

She has been my shadow lately but I made the mistake of walking away from the table at lunch today and she bit the crud out of her 4 year old sister. Looks like she she'll be eating in the kitchen in a high chair until I can get this under control.
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Old 02-28-2013, 04:19 PM
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daycarediva daycarediva is offline Member
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I have a 3 strikes rule. Never had to term anyone over it though.
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Old 02-28-2013, 08:27 PM
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saved4always saved4always is offline Member
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Location: Ohio
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I have a biter now, too. He is 2.5 years old and is non-verbal so cannot voice his frustration. He bites when other children take toys from him or when he wants a toy that another child has and that child refuses to give it up. In the last few weeks, he has bitten a child who is his age three or more times and another child who is younger 1 time. He has attempted to bite countless more times but I was able to intervene before he could get a grip and leave a mark. It really stinks because I find that I have to keep my eyes on this child constantly so it is affecting the activities I can do with the group. The only thing I know to keep him from biting is shadowing him. Since I am in a center, I do not have control of terming although I am keeping a log of bites as well as writing up incident reports for each one. If this had happened when I did childcare in my home, I would have termed by now.
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Old 03-01-2013, 08:34 AM
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dEHmom dEHmom is offline
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I have a 1 year old biter that I posted about before. She is a bit better, but she's sure pushing limits lately in other ways. She's left several bruises on one of my dcg's that i've had for a long time. Basically, I have to be with her all day, and I spoke with my licensor as well, she says really all I can do is make sure i'm with her 100% of the time, or keep her separated when I can't be.
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